Zigzag Idiot

Update My friend showed up the other day and said he'd been sickly. He also said he'd pulled a dead decaying rat out of the well. The well we had drank out of on July 4th. I said, " damn".

The Science of Idiotism is about the hindrances to becoming a Self Realized Being, plus other stuff. The term Idiot here is drawing an the old Greek usage of it as: being oneself,,unpretentious ,,,, But it is used also simultaneously as the standard modern usage of fool because until we 'have our Being', life is experienced on the emotional pendulum connected with dualistic thinking and we are pretty much just a torture to the world, of some kind or other. I used to be an a epic complainer in addition to Alcoholic and coward. After that, I went around depressed and with a long sad face because I couldn't drink alcohol and party it up forever. Some people can but I realized I couldn't. The Science of Idiotism is a little known teaching from the mystic George Gurdjieff. Bruno Martins - The Realized Idiot - is about the only book written solely about The Science of Idiotism. It's very good. I recommend it. You can find a little here and there with a google search. Zigzag idiot is #9 on the Ladder of Reason. Of all the Idiots, I thought this one made the best screen name. I've been working on my self for a few years doing self inquiry. Keeping this Journal out here in front of God and everybody meshes well with the Gurdjieff work of Self Observation and Self Remembering. The whole lot of us are just bad full of bullshit, says Gurdjieff. Justifying,,, self deception,,, Kundabuffer he called it in his book Beelzebub's Tales To His Grandson. I really like AH Almaas's The Diamond Approach. It's Gurdjieff,,, modernized plus psychological explanation of things like our defenses against inadequacy. Is it a schizoid splitting off and sticking ones head in the sand? or do we employ a Grandiose self to shield against inadequacy. This work which includes, very much processing our shadow material can be very painful and destabilizing. Being light hearted can amount to good strategy if it can be sincere and natural. This Work teaches we project any repressed guilt we may have out onto others. I've observed this in myself over time. Also, we don't have to be negative. The practice of not expressing negative emotions has shown me the existence of my own spiritual sleep. We wake up and although might never sleep as deeply again, spiritually, we take naps as E.J. Gold put it. It's very difficult sometimes to just simply feel , without repressing negative emotions and not give expression to them. It pays out big dividends in 'spiritual coin' though. Remind me of this, if, in later post, I go off on a angry emotional rant.

Obvatyl=householder - A somewhat balanced human being who can interact and get things done in the world. When they become disillusioned with life and the trappings of materialism. That is the possible entrance into the “Work”, with a head start. A teacher once said to me, “the Work is for Losers”.

That's it. I agree. The imagination is more of a curse than potential capacity for creativity for a good deal of the human race. Having it as an avenue for escapism enables the needed dissociation to not face uncomfortable aspects of oneself. Unconstrained imagination keeps people asleep in different forms of identification. I don't want to be overly negative here though. Self deception is a major hurtle for people who are interested in actualizing their potentials. By it's very nature, we can see others psychological blind spot better than we can see our own.

It doesn't matter what genre. It doesn't have to be inspirational. It doesn't need to be explained. Everything is welcome. Sad, goofy, angry, happy, inspirational, weird, profound, profane, etc.,,,,

Thanks @LastThursday

Personality Style Test Your personality style is: Schizoid Your test scores suggest that your personality style entails: A defect in your ability to form social relationships and an under-responsiveness to all sorts of stimuli. You exhibit an intrinsic emotional "flatness" where the highs don't get too high and the lows don't get too low. Emotions like joy, anger, and sadness do not move you as much as they move other people. Your natural state appears to be one where you have "retired" a bit into yourself, which is one source of the calmness that characterizes your normal state. Unlike what might be expected, your passivity and lack of vitality is not a form of self-protection, but simply seems to be your natural state. I was too retarded to copy the results like everyone else has . I don't think the result was very accurate for me. How do you copy and share the results like y'all have?

Pretty wild,,, 9 minutes

When I understand someone. I'm able to forgive any transgression or overlook a possible grievance. Understanding comes from seeing an aspect in them that l have also witnessed in myself. An aspect that might be considered a character flaw. In having experienced remorse over the 'shared experience', a feeling of empathy arises in myself for their possible uncomfortableness. Understanding becomes a treasure that brings a form of inner peace and makes patience more possible. That may sound a bit self righteous the way I worded it. Beginners mind fits well at this point.

These are my take-aways,,, True wisdom is understanding. Understanding comes about from a combination of knowledge and Being. Beingness and presence are lacking in the contemporary civilization. Time is taking precedence over space where knowledge and information are dominant juxtaposed to Being. Thinking is more often dominating over feeling. Open up to your feelings by becoming empty-headed. Get out of your head by putting attention on the physical sensation of your feet. It can also help to role play a very stupid person. Allow feelings to surface from a place of innocence. A relaxed body is an honest body. Short attention span theatre is eroding the character quality of patience in a fast paced world. Technology is increasing the prevalence of depression in humans. Before you become big hearted in a practical way, you have to experience indulgence and actually observe yourself being a selfish, impatient asshole. It’s not so much the experience of gluttony and satiation but observing it in real time which can aid the healing of addictions in a more enduring way opposed to current culture’s strategy of subtle or blatant shaming. Don’t let other people divide you against yourself. Aloha,,,

A very enjoyable YouTube combining Gurdjieff, Sheldrake, Nicoll, Jung, Lazlow, and others, rendering a thoughtful, meandering description of a whole pile things sitting next to, and within, a stack of holons. May everyone reading this be cursed with some kind of problem or inconvenience today which results in an unexpected growth or insight which broadens your perspective and adds a degree of understanding which correlates in a certain proportion to the suffering experienced from said curse. So that the sensation of time being warped results without the effect of memory loss which is usually a side effect of time warp growth phenomena. A blessing/curse of a certain kind must be long winded. Don’t axe me why results are often shattering. Have a good bad day in a heyoka kind of way.

From the teachings of A.H. Almaas What is Ontology? Diamond Approach Teachings About: Ontology Activities Don't Have an Ontological Presence This is a very important difference. It means that emotions don't really exist except in the sense that activities exist. They are activities, and activities don't have an ontological presence. Essence, on the other hand, is not an activity. As we saw in chapter 1, essence is a presence, and its basic quality is its existence as an ontological actuality, as a “suchness.” An emotion is an activity that starts and ends, whereas essence is a presence. An emotion is like the movement of water, the activity that is the motion. The motion of water is not the water. Water can be still, without motion. Essence, on the other hand, is like the water. It exists whether there is motion or not. Essence with the Elixir of Enlightenment, pg. 26 Ego is a Structure or a Structured Process Whereas the Pearl is an Ontological Presence The pearl is the real, complete, balanced, and rounded personality that psychologists believe they are talking about when they are discussing the ego. We must remember that the ego is a structure, or a structured process, whereas the pearl is essence, which means the pearl is an ontological presence. We call it the personal essence because among all the essential aspects it alone is personal. It is experienced as having a personal flavor to it, in contradistinction to impersonal. All aspects of essence, even love and kindness, are impersonal. But the pearl is personal. And this is its miraculous quality, totally unexpected and unfathomable. Some people interested in inner development try to become objective and impersonal, to move away from identifying with the personality. The personality is personal, and so the personal feeling is mistrusted and avoided. However, the pearl beyond price feels personal without being the personality. It has the capacity to make a personal contact with another human being and still be free, totally unconditioned, free from the past and its influences. Essence with the Elixir of Enlightenment, pg. 162 Essence is an Embodied Presence, an Ontological Actuality There are other classes of mental experience that are customarily regarded as the experience of essence when in fact they are not, such as the experiences of insight and intuition. In psychotherapy, for instance, one might have an insight about oneself, about others, or about the nature of reality. It often occurs as a flash of illumination and is accompanied by a sense of expansion and certainty. Such insights can provide valuable information and affective satisfaction. Still, the experience of insight is not itself essence, not yet. An insight is an event, and essence is a presence. An insight is an experience of understanding a specific truth, whereas essence is an embodied presence, an ontological actuality Essence with the Elixir of Enlightenment, pg. 21 Essence Reveals Itself as the Ontological Nature of All Existence This essentialization can include all aspects. So the soul’s action can be intelligent, compassionate, clear, steadfast, etc., in a total and full way. And this action can be physical, expressive, or mental. She is presence of essence, but also a dynamic living presence whose morphogenic transformations express the pure perfections of true nature. In this transformation the soul has progressed from the stage of the human soul, the attainment of the second journey, to the stage of the angelic soul, or the essential soul. The second side of the development of nonduality in the journey in presence has to do with essential presence manifesting its ground of true nature. Essence here reveals itself not only as the ontological nature of the soul but as the ontological nature of all existence, all manifestation. True nature begins to reveal its omnipresence, disclosing that it is the ground and nature of everything. This appears as true nature revealing its boundless and formless dimensions that transcend the limited boundaries of the ego-self, even the individuality or personhood of the soul. The soul does not experience herself here as an individual soul, but as a boundless and nonlocal presence that transcends all spatial extensions, as eternal nowness that transcends all time, and as a mystery that transcends all determinations. She is all and everything, she is Reality. The Inner Journey Home, pg. 225 It is Possible to Experience Ourselves as the Actual Ontological Presence that We Are Our experience of ourselves can be transformed from identifying with our mental self-images to having awareness of less contingent, more fundamentally real aspects of the self. It is possible to arrive at a place where we can experience ourselves as the actual phenomenon, the actual ontological presence that we are, rather than as ideas and feelings about ourselves. The more we are able to contact the actual presence that we are, the less we are alienated in a superficial or externally defined identity. The more we know the truth of who we are, the more we can be authentic and spontaneous, rather than merely living through concepts of ourselves. Among the many methods that shift the quality and depth of experience, those used by religious and spiritual traditions are more effective in contacting deeper dimensions of the self, with a more thoroughly developed understanding of these dimensions and their significance for living life than those used by the newer science of psychology. However, psychology has contributed powerful new knowledge about the human being that allows us to systematically work through the barriers to these deeper levels of self, especially the barriers to integrating these levels into one’s identity. In particular, the current understanding of narcissism is very useful for the process of inner realization, the process of learning to contact and appreciate the deeper levels of our nature and allowing these dimensions to actually affect our identity The Point of Existence, pg. 7 Ontological Presence It is possible to arrive at a place where we can experience ourselves as the actual phenomenon, the actual ontological presence that we are, rather than as ideas and feelings about ourselves. The Point of Existence, pg. 7 There are 8 or 9 more excerpts here https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/ontology

Ted Neugent through the Ages. Ted playing guitar with Amboy Dukes and go go dancers. The galloping rhythm of the song is somehow both humorous and cringeworthy when hearing the lyrics. Ted is also an accomplished bow hunter. He’s a real bad ass. Being an advocate of hunter education and gun ownership reveals his down to earth practicality.

Actualizing our potential brings us together Birds of a feather who flock together Sometimes I'm a crow in peacock feathers I enjoy lightheartedness and sometimes I enjoy arguing Thank you for allowing me some space here @Leo Gura@Keryo Koffa and everyone here,,, "We have to bless the living crap out of everyone." - Matt Kahn

4th of July Digging out a storm cellar and moving around some old railroad ties, I sweated out 3 different changes of clothes today. I put each change of clothes into the shower and stood on them and let the soapy water run over them so that they wouldn't stink as bad, having had a prewash and not stinking up the bedroom and utility. Late in the afternoon I took my tools and drove to a friend's house to help him change out a tire on one of his front wheels. I was out of practice with this kind of chore. There were 3 of us and we were working clumsily against one another but finally prevailed. Midway, we took a break. He doesn't have running water at his house. He has an old hand dug well about 50 foot deep. He lowered a bucket down and brought up some refreshing water that had a great taste! About five buckets he brought up. The temperature of the water very cool. We filled our drink containers several times and took turns pouring the water over one another to cool off. Getting water out of that old well was a neat experience.

To everyone on this thread. Thank you for your opinions and expressions. I wish you well. If you're in a highly stressful or hostile environment with someone in your face screaming, the behavior you exhibit is probably going to be different than it would be in a calm, peaceful environment. The capacity for self-deception in humans is awesome. We can be so idealistic and hooked into our self image in so many subtle ways. To divide oneself into a higher and a lower nature immediately divides us against ourself/selves,, ,however you want to frame this perspective. We have our instinctual drives that vary among different endocrine types. Humans are oversexed. Some more than others. Men have on average 10 times the amount of testosterone than women have. (Adrenal types ; mesomorphs) are way more physically active than sedate types like those heavily influenced by the (parathyroid,, endomorphs,,, those who are more fleshy). Apart from genetic influences are those of conditioning which influences the personality/ego of the individual. To frame an ideal of what constitutes a person who is interested in actualizing puts a lot of constriction on the subject immediately. But we do it anyway. We need a map of sorts. Thats normal. Phases and chapters of development. We go through times of throwing away our maps and burning our boats. Maybe we decide to lose all discipline concerning diet or reading. What the hell. I can't do all this stuff at one time simultaneously. Quite often I probably appear to be someone who is extremely irresponsible. What is your degree of Being? Do you observe that your degree of Being or Presence, fluctuates in the course of a day. No one stays the same. Expressed hyperbolically- They become a different person every 5 minutes. Rome falls nine times an hour,,, The following is from the I CHING Oracle of the Cosmic Way The idea of attaining peace, as presented by the collective ego, involves retreating from the everyday world, spending hours in contemplation or meditation, and engaging in ascetic practices. Such efforts come from spiritual ambition, which possesses a person once he has adopted the flattering self-image of "being spiritual," or "becoming a superior man. " Berlow is a link to nine separate excerpts concerning actualization by A.H. Almaas Ridhwan (diamondapproach.org)https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/actualization

Realization can arrive quietly and in an unexpected way,,, What almost inevitably happens? We start napping again by losing the inner quiet that was encountered through understanding. Becoming identified with some idea, emotion, or physical object in our outer world brings back distortions. That’s how it seems anyway. Interesting part of my I CHING reading this morning. Line 6. He meets with firm allegiance, and is still further bound. The King introduces him to the western mountain. "He" in this line refers to the person who has been freed from a loyalty spell that has bound him to the collective ego. The king refers to the Sage, that reintroduces him into unity with the Cosmic Whole, which is here represented by the "western mountain" as a place of harmony. This line informs him that through following the Sage and his inner truth, he has left behind the turmoil of the parallel reality, where opposites rule. The idea of attaining peace, as presented by the collective ego, involves retreating from the everyday world, spending hours in contemplation or meditation, and engaging in ascetic practices. Such efforts come from spiritual ambition, which possesses a person once he has adopted the flattering self-image of "being spiritual," or "becoming a superior man " "The king introduces him..." can refer to this kind of self-flattery, but also to someone who, through such flattery, has devoted himself to becoming the best scholar, athlete, competitor, etc., as mentioned in the main text of this hexagram. This line informs him that he has created a fate by following the path that leads to attaining recognition by the collective ego. He can free himself of that fate by ridding himself of the self-image he has adopted, and asking the Sage for help to restore him to the Cosmic Whole. From: I CHING The Oracle of the Cosmic Way

Karma Yoga The essence of the idea of Karma-Yoga is to meet with unpleasant things equally with pleasant things. That is, in practicing Karma-Yoga, one does not seek always to avoid unpleasant things, as people ordinarily do. Life is to be met with non-identifying. When this is possible, life becomes one's teacher; in no other sense can life become a teacher, for life taken as itself is meaningless, but taken as an exercise it becomes a teacher. It is not life that is a teacher, but one's relation through non-identifying makes it become a teacher. Nothing can change being so much as this practice - namely, to take the unpleasant things in life as an exercise. (Maurice Nicoll, Commentaries, Vol. 1) I listened to this a couple of times today. When working and listening to a YouTube I’ll often play it twice because I’ll usually miss bits of it, Below is another that I recently listened to. I like the gal who gives the introduction,,, Enjoy the life all you can and don’t try to change how you feel. Every feeling you have is correct. There’s a lesson in every feeling we experience.

Looking without expectation Faces are everywhere Their voices are heard but are mostly outside of Time The messages are heard as lies mostly and are not in agreement with the world The messages of the voices from the faces ,,,,, Are they a more involved psychological projection? Am I dipping into the collective unconscious? Intuition whispers this to me Who knows,,,,, Who knows? Only those who are not in a place of concern it seems They have no vested interest in having a body Rare is the individual who has a body and hears some of these messages from the voices of the disconnected faces. I only know of one such person but the messages he hears are not the same ones I hear. He is a poor listener most of the time and to be honest, I think he’s crazy.

One of Our Deepest Attachments is to Our Self-Image How does attachment manifest throughout our lives? It manifests in all areas, in all corners, at all levels, in all its gradations. One of our deepest attachments is to our self-image, both how we see ourselves and how others see us. Our self-image is who we think we are, how we want to be, what we want to have in our life—whether it’s a house that looks a certain way, a certain lover or mate who fills certain criteria. “I’m a good person and deserve this,” or “I’m a bad person.” The self-image we are attached to is often negative. Everyone has some negative self-image. If you’re attached to being good, then you’re always finding proof that you’re a good person. You might be attached to a self-image of being good, strong, powerful, rich, beautiful, popular, being married, single, etc. This is the most superficial layer; and it’s where most people live. The most common level of consciousness is focused on this superficial image level. Diamond Heart Book II, pg. 51 Source of Self-image can be Revealed by Essence This is where Essence is valuable; it will give you the knowledge and understanding that no one else can. If you deeply investigate the issue of self-image, you'll come to the essential aspect that corresponds to self-image. When this happens, you will experience Essence in a way that has no self-image; instead there will be space, openness, inner spaciousness. This is the essential aspect that was lost when you developed the self-image and believed that the self-image was who you truly are. The self-image always has a boundary -- physical, emotional or conceptual. When you experience space, you experience yourself as being without boundaries, without definition, just openness. Diamond Heart Book II, pg. 36

Synchronicity = an accident that is waiting to happen.

Don’t ya love these,,,,?

The gruesome video above may have not been authentic. Here’s some intimidating footage of bombs being dropped on a roadway. War is stupid. Sometimes necessary I guess. I felt my expressions about the possible future of the U.S and world economies were clumsy. Anyhow the pace of our changing world seems to be speeding up with A.I., robotics, and nanotechnology. I don’t like killing anything. I’ll kill red wasps, scorpions, some spiders and 2-3 kinds of poisonous snakes. I killed a red wasp with a fly swat the other day. It’s pretty do-able. A friend of mine used to hunt them with a BB gun. Have a nice evening,,,