Zigzag Idiot

I felt I run full speed into a brick wall with your statement that Leo hates you.,,,,?

@jbram2002 Have you tried typing yourself according to the Enneagram of personality. Contained in this system is what's called the idea of 'chief feature'. This can give someone a place to start from in dealing with things of this nature. Apart from endocrine (essence) types which are fixed and unchangable, The attributes of personality are said to be not as fixed and thus changeable. Something we can have the actual capacity to do something about. I can empathize. I struggle often at times with escape into comfort food for dissociation from reality.

http://www.primasounds.com/the-discovery-of-primasounds/

Greg Braden's talk I posted in High Consciousness Resources reminded me of the Work being done at Heartmath.

Orange materialistic worldview needs to hear this.

@seeking_brilliance ???Oh that's great! That's rich.?

I've had a long battle with cynicism. It kept me from understanding forgiveness.

? All the synchronicities My attention is hooked. ??‍♂️

The capacity to hold one's tongue and just feel and observe. There is almost always honesty in silence.

At about 47:30 ,,,,, similar to Fourth Way/Gurdjieff Cosmology

@MrWolf ?‍♂️?‍♂️?‍♂️?‍♂️?‍♂️? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centers_(Fourth_Way)

I'm happy when I remember to let go. Someone said Zen mind is Beginners mind.

According to David N. Wilkin, "The Latin Fathers translated metanoia as paenitentia, which came to mean "penance" or "acts of penance.""[4] Tertullian protested the unsuitable translation of the Greek metanoeo into the Latin paenitentiam ago by arguing that "in Greek, metanoia is not a confession of sins but a change of mind."[9] "Conversion" (from the Latin conversiōn-emturning round) with its "change in character" meaning is more nearly the equivalent of metanoia than repentance.[13] The Greek Orthodox Church in America teaches that "The Greek term for repentance, metanoia, denotes a change of mind, a reorientation, a fundamental transformation of outlook, of man's vision of the world and of himself, and a new way of loving others and God. In the words of a second-century text, The Shepherd of Hermas, it implies "great understanding," or discernment."[19] In his 1881 The Great Meaning of the Word Metanoia, Treadwell Walden, Episcopal priest and sometime rector of St. Paul's Church, Boston, designated cathedral of the diocese in 1912, asserts that metanoia conveys the essence of the Christian gospel. Walden holds that the meaning of the Greek metanoia is very different from the meaning of the English "repentance". He describes the translation of metanoia as repentance as "an extraordinary mistranslation." Walden believed the meaning of metanoia as a "transmutation" of consciousness contrasted with classical Greek which he viewed as expressing a superficial change of mind.[20] Walden sought to promote the proper meaning of metanoia as "change of Mind, a change in the trend and action of the whole inner nature, intellectual, affectional and moral" over against its translation as repentance.[21] In Repentance: A Cosmic Shift of Mind and Heart, Edward J.Anton observes that in most dictionaries and in the minds of most Christians the primary meaning of "repent" is to look back on past behavior with sorrow, self-reproach, or contrition, sometimes with an amendment of life. But neither Jesus nor John the Baptist says to look back in sorrow. For St Paul, "metanoia is a transfiguration for your brain" that opens a new future.[22] excerpt from https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metanoia_(theology) If you find this inapplicable or of little use please let me know and I will 'hide'it. ?

I appreciate the wisdom. For years on this journey, I've wandered off and on into the desert. In regard to this, I once heard Arnold Keyserling, a student of Gurdjieff, mention about this in a talk he was giving about the path to Actualization. Sometimes we just find ourselves in the desert unexpectedly. It can be a bitter pill to swallow in the moment but then eventually we find our way back out of it. ?

Autobiographical accounts which read like novels - https://www.amazon.com/Warriors-Way-Challenging-Life-Games/dp/0440593859 https://www.amazon.com/Meetings-Remarkable-Men-All-Everything/dp/0140190376/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=Meetings+with+remarkable+men&qid=1569869817&s=books&sr=1-2 Meetings with Remarkable men is autobiographical, but reads like a novel. Gurdjieff on an expedition crossing the Gobi desert- "The first thing next day, with the consent of our consciousness, degenerated like those of all contemporary people and and corresponding exactly to the requirements of hell, we killed all the goats, which only the day before we had regarded as our sincere friends and associates in overcoming the difficulties of the journey." After this admirable Christian-Mohammedan manifestation, one of use began to cut thier meat into small pieces in order to roast it.,,,,,,, PD Ouspensky- Strange life of Ivan Osokin

@Mezanti Seems like good council from @Average Investor @Ibn Sina @universe @Deepconcepts Early in life, I noticed the guys who didn't give a shit had women all around them and knocking down their door. I tried faking this attitude but it didn't work at all and was discouraged further. For Me I considered the anxious vibes that still radiated from me while trying to fake this nonchalant cool detachment which most intuitive females recognize at a glance. Developing an authentic embodied, spontaneous, basic trust as opposed to calculated Fonzareli acting cool amounts to a vast difference In relaxedness which our feminine counterparts can intuit at the drop of a hat. Whereas the confused and needy potential female mate will be captivated by the "Fonzarelli" types. Happy days sitcom analysis. The world was seemingly at Fonzi's beck and call but honest and authentic Richy Cunningham held the treasure of true Being in his authenticity. I struggled for years with this phenomena, even after fully being aware of it. I couldn't implement it due to my deep insecurities mostly. For me it has unfolded extremely and excruciatingly slow despite being aware of the general phenomena. I hope you're aware of the old tv series Happy days or this post won't make much sense,,,,, ?‍♂️?

No. For me, it in itself is not wrong but something to taste and observe to the fullest. Sometimes it means an encounter with unrequited Love which is said sometimes to open up a radical breaking apart and healing the onesidedness of unrequited love. Possibly the Love which stays repressed to a degree in which finds the door to the outside as a perceptual filter which everything is perceived through Love and the resultant oceanic feeling.

Technically, fear is itself, is a delusion. Fear is an over consideration of the past and also so of the future where as being is radically in the present.an openness to whatever is or will be. On having this thought come through me , the old Mary Tyler Moore sitcom thing appeared in my mind.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golf_in_the_Kingdom https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Journey_to_Ixtlan https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Celestine_Prophecy https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Tenth_Insight:_Holding_the_Vision

With the possibility that I may stumble into a place of partially losing my marbles, I shared a link to my Journal with my former and potential Therapist a few weeks ago. Hi Jim! I put Jim potentially in charge of the big safety net. I still intend to seek council from Emerald on a couple issues in the near future, though. Silence is Golden... Sometimes by Dr. Jim Rosen ©2019 Dr. Jim Rosen His mini-column just released this morning. There are times when you need to speak up and express yourself. But for those of you who grew up with abuse or neglect, expressing yourself is most difficult to do. In your early world, it frankly wasn't safe. It wasn't even safe to feel things, let alone show those feelings. And saying them to outsiders was especially taboo. Dysfunctional homes can have a lot of "family secrets." These secrets add fuel to the idea that you are somehow terrible and awful. Your early world invades your present life and spills over to other things that should be shared. You dread that the people you want to share with will think you're bad. So you keep quiet. And the negative feelings about yourself spiral. Psychotherapy can end this vicious spiral and release you from your hiding place. The silence is broken, and at long last the pain and bad feelings are cast off. Dr. Jim Rosen is a PhD Clinical Psychologist. He is an experienced psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, and couples counselor. He offers treatment for anxiety disorders, panic attacks, depression, relationship problems, self-esteem issues, assertiveness training, anger control, stress management, and overcoming the effects of sexual, physical, and emotional trauma. Dr. Rosen sees patients in his home in Magnet Cove, Arkansas (20 minutes from Hot Springs). Because he doesn't accept insurance, his fee is only $55 for a full 50-minute hour of treatment. Of course it's best when you can work with him face to face, but when that isn't possible, telephone sessions are available. He can be reached anytime at 501-623-2050. If you like Dr. Rosen's column, you are free to share it with other people. There is no fee for this column. It's free. If you're not on the list to receive it, just send an email that says "Please Send Column" in the subject line. You will receive a new column each Sunday. If you are on the list and you don't want to receive Dr. Rosen's column anymore, just send him an email that says "Stop Column" in the subject line.

@milii possibly study different typologies in order to find ways or recognize how to undo some of these possible twists. You mention anger which points to the personality Enneatype 1 (the perfectionist) who's chief feature is anger This suggest possibly you may also fall into the category of man#2 as well in the (endocrine) essence type ( center of gravity) in the Queen of hearts, feeling everything in such an intence emotional way,,,, just my thoughts,,,,, good luck ? With your work.