Zigzag Idiot

Being is spontaneity. Mind is reactive. "Worry is preposterous" - Terence McKenna

Set and setting,,,, in relation to peak breakthroughs. Silence is golden but It's also interesting the effects of having very high quality sound equipment combined with a stiff dose of 5 meo dmt with eyes closed. Different genres of music as well.

I've watch Akilesh's podcast twice and Just watched this one by Martin Butler on Kant. I thought these videos were complementary to one another.

Sounds like Heaven on Earth. ?

Thanks @DrewNows i just watched the video @pluto shared. I like the distinctions he makes about anger and attention.

I like ? @JustThinkingAloud Thsnks!

"Suddenly I realized I had carried around unconsciously for five years, a masturbation fantasy about Wilma Flintstone." - George Carlin Sexual energy is considered a center unto itself in the Fourth Way Work. A system of seven centers.

I was born in 1967 so I kinda grew up in the 70's-80's. Thank you. When I quit cigarettes and stayed on pain pills for a few weeks, I fell in love with Warren Beaty for a short time. It's the only time in my life that I felt really gay. Particularly Warren Beaty in his role in Heaven can wait. This was about 20 years ago.

No problemo. I enjoy the company ?

@remember Thank you. I truly didn't mean it in a mysoginistic way but I can easily see how it could be interpreted that way. I really appreciate Your straightforwardness. We're all multidimensional- multiperspectival at times. And sometimes I can just be a dick or have a warped since of humor on occasion. Thank you again for reaching out and expressing yourself. I appreciate that.

Pitfalls on the Path This is a summary of some obsticals we might encounter on our journey toward supreme consciousness. We are each a spectrum of various degrees of the pitfalls that make up our shadow side. The shadow playing into the light and the light playing into the shadow. Love-consciousness would be the light side that is half of who we are, would it not? The darkside would be the recalcitrant neglect of cues from body-mind-soul-muse regarding the appropriate care and love-consciousness for self or other. Shadow is perhaps the separate-self-sense's blind concern and focus on that which stops the heart from expanding to infinity. Kundalini and our beliefs about God and spirituality are not important. What is of ultimate value to us is Life, love and relationship. If our kundalini and our beliefs are interfering with our Life, love and relationship then we must do everything within our power of awareness to rectify this situation. 1-Pathological Regression Retreat into infantile prerational uroboric fusion. Indulgence in dissolution and fragmentation; often due to lack of modeling, support, structure or clearly defined developmental framework of ascent that covers all sides of the whole human (survival, somatic, emotional, social, spiritual). Desire to let ones life collapse in the hope of being rescued. Retreat into depression and grief to escape more expansive perception and profound sense of being 2-Running Away Retreat and evasion through dissociation and denial. Inertial holding back to former modes of perception and being. Effort to pull energy down, back and in through substance addictions, heavy food, sedentary lifestyle and through avoidance of "opening" practices and therapy. Secondary fear chemistry due to negative interpretation of kundalini events resulting in panic, paralysis, stagnation, isolation and avoidance. Even running away from bliss and increased wellbeing with various forms of anaesthetization, self-repression and self-destruction. 3-Oblivion Bliss obsession is a preoccupation and addiction to blissful energy, using it as a form of narcotic anaesthetization to avoid real world obligations, survival and development imperatives. Hazy, diffuse, forgetful, preoccupied, heedlessness, day dreaming, castle building, directionless. Lost in fantasy, trance, myth, symbol, story, meaning making, synchronicities and connections. Creativity at the expense of survival, through avoidance of rational discernment. 4-Diffusion Loss of left-brain focusing and hierarchical prioritization. Chain of Being collapsed. Codependency, dependency, false security in catering to the egos of others, coupled with lower-order giving through forms of slavery whereby ones highest contribution is lost in obscurantism, confusion, ambiguity, paradox, double-binds due to the collapse of the hierarchical prioritizing faculty. Indistinct, labyrinthine, vague, leaky boundaries, jumbled, enigmatic. 5-Fixation on Internal Processes Overly fascinated, morbidly curious, distracted by and absorbed in kundalini symptoms, psychic phenomena and newfound spiritual powers (siddhas). This compulsive obsession with symptoms and phenomena feeds inflation and interferes with relationships and functional utility. Possible secondary fear or depression over the temporary loss of adaptive functions and left-brain sharpness. Inability to disembed to perceive emotional storms as psychosomatic events of alchemical cycles. Excessive reactivity to conditions both internal and external. 6-Chasing the Dragon Blindly engaging in practices, stimulants, relationships and events with the aim of rapidly increasing the intensity and speed of the trajectory of kundalini opening. Thereby increasing the danger of more extreme peaks and valleys, which could result in tissue damage, depression, regression and burnout. Self destructive use of the alchemy for thrills, novelty and status. 7-Inflation Expanded psychic ability, high energy and siddhas inflate the ego to feel overly special, superior and unique. This feeds into the separate-self-sense's illusion of an independent existence and promotes selfishness or "my enlightenment for me." World savior, grand mission, martyr, new religions, global ideas, evangelical crusade. Visionary over-estimation of reality and potential, generating the propensity to forcibly impose ones will on the world. 8-Internal Exploitation Turning the sacred into the profane. Lack of integration between the levels, coupled with disillusionment about achieving "higher goals." Hence exploitation of sex/kundalini/muse energy for "worldly goals" of power, status or monetary gain. "Using" oneself is an introverted symptom of inflation. The more we exploit ourselves the more others exploit us. Treating ourselves as a resource without regard for our spiritual welfare. 9-External Exploitation Using powerful psychic and siddha powers to exploit others in order to fulfill ones own drive for power, status or monetary gain. Lust, usurpation, manipulation, dominator-hierarchies. Power mongering is an extraverted symptom of inflation. The more we exploit others, the more we exploit ourselves through turning the sacred into the profane. Treating others as a resource without regard for their spiritual welfare. 10-Projecting Spirit Transference onto Gurus, lovers, alien or channeled entities, angels, saints etc...in disownership of ones own alchemical process, soul and muse. Feels like a powerful force enacting on us from outside, sometimes seeming too great for mortal endurance. Externalization of internal archetypal aspects (Great Attractors) ultimately resulting in our reclaiming them as our own through the pain generated by the projection. 11-Formalism Entrenched preoccupation with appearances, rules, forms, formulas, dogmas, details, rituals and traditions of religious sects. Fanaticism, orthodoxy, fundamentalism, letter of the word, conservatism, conventional, spiritual materialism, elitism/exclusion, need to "belong." Feeds into power, pride and defense systems of the psyche. 12-Perpetual Seeker Looking for wholeness and Self outside oneself. Fragmentation due to lack of coherent integration, individuation and boundary definition. Spirit always over the horizon, without serious intention of achieving Self, due to resistance to sovereignty and autonomous choice. Tendency toward projecting Spirit and formalism. Need for parental figures as there is an unconscious commitment to remain immature, obsequious and surrender ones personal power. Bottom dog trying to gain power through connection to a Guru or power figure. 13-Addiction to Cognition Inability to relax into the spaciousness of the transrational due to tenacious drive of the mind to "know." Unwilling to let go of focal, associative, analytic mind in order to transcend and include it in "whole-seeing" and full spectrum consciousness. Resistance to relinquishing the myopia of the representational mind and thus avoid uniting the relative will with the Absolute Will; perhaps due to lack to lack of faith or knowledge that there is anything higher than intellect. 14-Absolute Knowledge Loss of growth potential by closing off to new information due to the hubris of a premature claim to enlightenment. Rigidified bubble of the known as a defense against chaos, dynamism, dissolution and breakdown--thereby preventing resurrection to a higher order. Bombastic grandiose omniscience. Cults, obdurate, implacable, inflexible, rigid, unshakable, stagnant. Arrogance, self-righteousness, self-justification, vanity, pride, top of the heap. Forgets beginners mind due to inflation hence is ignorant of ones ignorance. 15-Spiritual Bypass "Premature transcendence--high level denial. Avoiding painful psychological issues by immersing oneself in a rigorous spiritual practice, or focusing on experiences of transcendence within the Kundalini phenomena to the exclusion of processing trauma from the past." - Michael Dubois 16-Abiding in the Absolute "Holding the absolute dimension so tightly that we can't see all the relative learning that we still have to do. Trivializing the sense of relative impermanence amidst the artificial perfection of what can seem like a permanent awakening." - Michael Dubois 17-Blinded by Clarity "When inner Vision and Intent become so clarified and overpowering, that the clarity itself fixates attention on a limited range of perceptions/interpretations/possibilities. Polishing the interpretive lens so thoroughly, that the lens itself becomes invisible as an object of perception." - Michael Dubois 18-Cosmic Paradox Religious forms kill the human spirit or stop it evolving, because religions, churches and ashrams are attempts to legitimize that which needs no legitimization (I am That). And in so doing, a defense against illegitimacy (evil) is set up, which perpetuates evil (self/other separation). Rather, what needs to occur is education in inclusivity, global embrace, We-thinking and the observation that the ego will always try and separate and elevate itself above the crowd in an attempt to acquire legitimacy (good), power and significance. From: http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=PitfallsonthePath.html

Bliss Bliss appears to be kundalini phenomena especially related to heart expansion and is a consequence of increased energy flow in the nerves. One of the functions of spiritual bliss is to incapacitate the higher cortical functions rendering the individual "childlike" soft, maluable, changable, open and to conserve energy and internal resources for the metamorphosis of the physical body that occurs. Normally our conditioned "I" is kept so busy, hypervigilant and preoccupied by the tasks of daily life and obligations that this "fall" into the spiritually receptive state doesn't occur. Hence the preponderance of unpopped humans populating the planet, all vigilantly remembering who they are. excerpt from: http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=Bliss.html

Electromagnetics of Kundalini The dry desert of Intellect,,,, "The heart generates the strongest electromagnetic field of the body, and this field becomes more coherent as consciousness shifts from the brain to the heart. This coherence significantly contributes to the informational exchange that occurs during contact between different electromagnetic fields. The more coherent the field the more potent the information exchange." 108, Stephen Harrod Buhner, The Secret Teachings of Plants, the Intelligence of the Heart in the Direct Perception of Nature; ~ GaianStudies.org During heart entrainment when the brain wave patterns are embedded within the larger field of the heart, information processing is very different. With entrainment the heart and brain oscillating together. When neurons in the brain entrain to the heart, their firing timing alters, and this timing of neuronal firing conveys several times more information than the firing count. Hippocampal activity increases significantly when the heart becomes the dominant oscillator. Increased demand on hippocampal function from feeling the world through heart-centered cognition, stimulates stem cells to form new neurons in the hippocampus. Heart coherence also reduces cortisol production thus enhancing hippocampal activity as well as boosting the immune system. With heart entrainment, brain chatter is reduced and there is more connection between brain and body. However when the brain becomes the dominant organ and the heart is entrained to the brain, the heart begins to lose its coherence. The more the heart entrains to the brain and the longer it does so, makes the heart less sensitive, less variable, more dissociated and basically less intelligent as an organ of gnosis. The focus of consciousness in the brain leads to an increased disconnection between brain and body. Since the heart's entrainment of the brain gives us the widest range of consciousness, sensitivity and health it is obviously "supposed" to be the dominant oscillator. It is afterall the seat of the soul and the organ for "Whole-seeing." The goal of life is the discovery of the intelligence of the heart. No matter where one journeys away from ones Heart-eye, all roads lead back to it...usually found again on ones death bed. "The intelligence of the heart is the intelligence of the Universe to hold itself in unison." ~ Joseph Chilton Pearce The dream of our waking life and the awakeness of our dream life are revealed. Excerpt from: http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=Electromagnetics.html

Kundalini & Schizophrenia ,,,,,,,,,After an awakening we become psychosomatically differentiated from the images, symbols, myths, stories and personal identity that we were so involved in before. Thus consciousness has become separated from its contents. Perhaps this is the difference between a schizophrenic and a mystic. The mystic has become emancipated from the persuasions of psychic content, while the schizophrenic has become lost in them.,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,Some of the chemistry could be similar between kundalini and various mental illnesses, because of kundalini’s perturbing revelatory quality, nothing is left unseen and unfelt within one...there is no where to hide. The former repressive hold of the ego is released by the dissolution and so the psychic tension is let fly...in whatever form we have stored within us. Relationships are particularly good at triggering kundalini awakenings because our brain's primary matrix is constructed in relationship to our primary caregiver in infancy—thus relationship later in life can trigger the release of incredible psychic forces bound up in such complexes as avoidance/attraction, double-bind, relentless dilemma, rejection and abandonment. Complexes, are webs of associations created by intense or repeated activation of an archetype. Psychic storms based on these kinds of primary archetypal patterns build slowly over the course of a life, underneath the repressive lid of our ego's coping mechanisms and defenses. One wonders what is left after all our compensations and camouflages are penetrated; is there a life at all if we are not doing all this secondary work of trying to prop ourselves up, defend ourselves or kill ourselves? But unless things build up to popping point, unless kundalini sparks up, we will remain in the clutches of the vice that we built to protect ourselves from the reality we were born into. The ego will not voluntarily go into that "hole" in our primary matrix...spirit however willingly goes there in equanimous embrace to find light in the dark. Kundalini is a spiritual force that arises spontaneously to save ourSelf from our self.,,,,,,,,, from: http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=KundaliniandSchizophrenia.html

Elton John wrote this ballad for his buddy John Lennon who got murdered on December 8th 1980. I was 13 years old. I remember seeing the news about the assassination on tv after school that day. It made me both sad and furious. There was a record heatwave and drought in Arkansas earlier in the summer that year. It was the first time I ever saw our creek run dry.

Bummer,,, This morning, me too. IPAD won't play YouTubes. Spandex looks great on women. That's my vote.

The Oceanic feeling. Love with a big L. Experienced but not clung to. To be swept from the face of the Earth as no self. Whoever holds the dustpan. Sweep me up. I'm all yours. Fling me back into the Ocean. Beyond this life. Outside of time. Unity in the Cosmic lost and found. Who could care and why or how so much? The Oceanic feeling is too big to talk about.

I like barf and sparkles.

Waited too long to edit. Ordered glasses on Friday. It's been 5 years since my last eye exam. Maybe that will help reduce my typos. I meant spacial realms just above not special realms. sensing thinking feeling willing combined with body soul spirit equals consciousness/God according to Keyserling's map/Wheel.

I've been avoiding becoming a member of Patreon because I don't want to have one more damn password to keep up with. How much sense does that make? Until I do, I'll probably just donate to Leo every now and then through PayPal. I would really like access to what extra stuff Martin and Leo offer through Patreon, though. Maybe I'll get off the fence and just do it. Just felt like admitting to some of my neurosis and backwardness. Have a good day everyone. ?‍♂️

@Preety_India I observe also what you're writing about. Speaking for myself, one factor is an off and on deep insecurity/ loneliness at times, maybe born out of an existential dread. Often an unrecognized fear or existential dread which is just horrible enough that anyone who pays me any attention at all, coupled with my imagination has often been the launching point for disfunctional relationships. Its difficult for me to sum up the reasons for all this perhaps because there seem to be a good number of variables. Insecurity is definitely one. In general forgiveness through understanding seems to be a starting point where both understanding and forgiveness can both grow to take more prominent positions in my life. Forgiveness and understanding which cultivate a more gentle love towards everything and everyone as a perceptual filter. This, in which Being can then attract likeness of being. I realize this is kind of vague in a sense but for now, sitting up in bed, barely awake. This is just what flowed out. Maybe it's a form of falling for the first who comes along and pays us some attention ( for various number of reasons) instead of staying rooted in ones own Being and remaining patient for the appearance of a potential mate who is truly compatible.......? ?‍♂️ The deal of having rough relationships with family members seems extra tough. I can emphasize here, for sure. Hardly anyone can trigger and knock us off balance like a close family member. I'Ve been trying/attempting radical forgiveness in general. It's not easy nor is it a popular message. Just some thoughts,,,,

I'm pretty sure Leo said that we need to study Consciousness in this video.l need to rewatch this and take note Arnold Keyserling said that The structure of Consciousness is 3x4 =12 The 4 Jungian functions multiplied by the 3 special realms of body, soul and spirit . The Keyserling wheel is a symbol or analogy of consciousness/God

❤️??