Arman

Hmmm sounds to me like energetic openings and release of charges as a result of meditation. I think it is a common experience for people to swing all the way back into unconscious behavior after minor 'awakenings' or energetic shifts. There's kind a pendulum effect. Anyway it sounds to me like you're holding on to something you refuse to let go of. The experience wants to release and integrate but you may be resisting it. Rest more, meditate more, and completely allow the experience to happen. Hit up a doc if you feel too bad.

This is an interesting one, because the implications are kind of potentially nightmarish, at least when you let the mind wander on the subject for a while, lol. Allow me to share the perspective and understanding that I most resonate with: Gonna try not to trip over my own words. I think the infinite aspect of creation is primarily a probabilistic one; meaning there is infinite potential for creation, and that there is no limit to what can be created and what 'Everything' can expand into. However, does that mean creation is going to run on creating everything into infinity, or that it has already all been simultaneously created? Maybe. My perspective is that while I think while all things are equally possible, only what is functional is rendered (created.) Now the term functional is a subjective one. I do suspect however that the universe creates towards some kind of ideal or direction. To my mind that direction is Love, whatever that is. I see it as the path of least resistance that allows for the greatest expansion and further creation so that the universe can further know itself. For example our physical domain seems to be super effective for growth of consciousness, creativity, discovering potentials, knowing onself, etc. However the universe is far less inclined to render a potential universe where everyone is ripping there arms off simply because it's not practical or effective for expansion. This would be governed by the dynamic intelligence of god. Side note: I think even the nature of our physical universe is mostly probabilistic and rendered. Meaning an empty space isn't even really 'real' or rendered until we step into it; purely because it's just more optimal for the universe to render what is most functional at all times. It also allows for greater creation potential: because if the contents of an empty space or empty room are set in stone, there is less creative potential there - however to the degree which we can forget or let go of its contents, that allows for more malleable probability if we were to interact with it. There's just no point to rendering the vast majority of physical reality, or the vast majority of infinite potential reality, because most of it isn't in alignment with the goal of expanding into love. It's like leaving an unused computer running while you leave the house. It's a waste of energy. Therefore when people say that all realities are equally and simultaneously real, I do not believe that means that they are all rendered and happening. I believe they are potentials that are waiting to be actualized if 'necessary' or useful. Therefore, if your personalized point of intelligence decides it is worth accessing, then so be it, you as an aspect of all that is has accessed that potential and rendered it for whatever reason.

Videos of fractals always put me into a state of shaken awe when I watch em. I always think about the first dude who programmed the first visual fractal simulator. Back then I think it was minutes to render even a single frame, but still. 'Understanding' fractals theoretically and experiencing the first visual representation would be two completely different things. Imagine that first dude sitting alone in a darkened room actually trying to comprehend the implications of what is suddenly very real. These things are the very epitome of mind boggling

Book recommendation: The Ultramind Solution. If you don't like the way your brain is operating, then aim to change it by studying what impacts focus and high functioning, and aim to make those changes. The brain is highly adaptable and capable of tremendous recovery.

Well said. My understanding is that as a result of evolutionary imperatives, we are built to receive and translate incredible amounts of information in what seems to be an instant. Historically, we may not have had time to shake someones hand, look them square in the eye and ask them their life story before deciding whether or not they were of sound quality. A moments hesitation could mean you have your head bashed in with a rock. So from the instant you see someone, you have already registered a vast amount of subtle information. How tall are they? How are they standing? Is their chest puffed out or is it receded? What race are they? How dilated are their pupils? Are they nervous? What about eye contact? What is their social status? If I had to fight them, would I win? If I did win, would the tribe turn on me, or embrace me? Then there is the micro-expressions and micro muscular movements on the face that even the adept can't hide. How they are positioned in relation to others, their vocal tonality and from where in their body they speak? Then we get into even deeper levels like pheromones. Of course there is no way we could possibly consciously go through all this information and make a decision in a meaningful span of time. So instead, within an absolute split second, all this information is combined, calculated, processed, translated and refined into the most convenient package creation can muster: a gut feeling. That's just the first encounter. We are always taking in vast amounts of information and translating it out of necessity, because social dynamics are life and death. I think women are even more adept at this kind of receiving and translating, as they have to take in an even deeper realm that deals with family, fertility, protection, and judging every value of a man. Girls have the ultimate bullshit detectors. And these are just one slice of the spectrum of observable empirical values. So what of the vast, vast amount of subtle energies that are also in constant exchange? I believe that every aspect of our being is always on communication with the whole, and certainly in communication with those in which we encounter. So every neurosis, every dysfunction and every deep seated secret is already out in the open. People know your energetic and psychological make up even if they think they don't. We can lie to ourselves but we can never lie to others. At best when someone lies to us, we're not fooled so much as we are willing to lie to ourselves. Some people are adept at reading into their feeling, and therefore intuitively knowing what to do, or how to act in relation to someone, or at any given moment, for the greatest outcome. The rest of us are profoundly talented at the opposite: ignoring our feelings and regarding them as base illusions. Perhaps that is true for much of what we feel in our bodies, but one must be able to discern between fear and other illusions, and between the still voice of intuition that is actually the concentrated deliverance of deep, deep intelligence.

Cool post. Yeah. People either stagnate, spiral up, or spiral down. Given brief encounters you can see where someone is heading. You can also get an idea from their behavior or how they speak as insight into their inner realms. Unless they have the awareness, or the grace, they are going to continue to cultivate the same vibrations and expand on them. To that degree, depending on your sensitivity, you can predict someones direction with decent odds. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

I think purpose depends on the individual. We meditate for different reasons. I suspect that regardless of why we meditate however, you get all the benefits in time, despite what you specifically desire. So explanation of meditation and its benefits depends on their temperament. You should cater to them. Some people will like the idea that meditating will make you happier. For others, that will actually be a turn off because it will remind them of woo-woo nonsense. Maybe it is better to point them in the direction of studies that show its improvements on health or concentration. Concepts like awareness and stillness are so commonplace for us that we forget that many people simply have zero reference of these ideas, and they are not particularly useful to them. Better they come to them experientially. Using these as motivators can be like putting the cart before the horse. For some, you can say it makes praying more deep and enjoyable. Or it helps to sleep. For some, you can say it is a tool for enlightenment. Others will like the idea that it helps move towards extrasensory phenomena, OOBE's and the like. There's no single sales pitch. What I think is more important than what you say, however, is when and why you say it. If you go around being fanatical or evangelical about meditation, you will find it quite ineffective. If you try to tell all your loved ones about meditation out of a great excitement, you may also find your attempts to sway them impotent. I think it comes down to an intuitive knowing of when someone is ripe. When someone is ripe all you need is the most gentle and general nudge and it is effective. You can sense in to yourself and know when you're being ineffective (and possibly doing more harm then good) by asking yourself if you sense any neediness in yourself, and if you would feel any less good if they rejected the idea. If you feel equanimity and gentle joy on the matter then you'll find your sharing very effective.

It is lovely that you empathize in this way. Consider the beauty of plants. Not all plants can be flowers, and not all flowers can be roses, but still they are equally beautiful. Maybe they are not fulfilling their potential to your eyes or your experience, but who is to say they should be anything other than what they are? Maybe they have chosen to be that way? Maybe there's another level at which your potential and their potential are equally fulfilled? do you feel sorry for this plant because it doesn't bloom flowers? would you avoid it because of this? Best to just shine light equally among everything

A large determinant of whether psychedelic experiences are positive or negative, is set and setting. This generally comes down to where you are, how you feel, who is around you, and what is going to be happening. These are the important factors. So simply, make sure you are in an isolated place where your mum or dad isn't going to come barging in... unless they're really cool. The last thing you want is to start coughing while you're blasted into hyperspace and your dad walks in to see if you're OK and thinks you're having an epileptic seizure or something. Make sure you're not having a bad day, that you're not in a scared place or anything like that. Just common sense. Stay hydrated and eat clean. good luck discovering The Truth. write it down on a napkin in case you forget it.

Nice dude. That's exciting. 21+ recommendation is probably for mental health, emotional stability and the fact that the brain is still heavily developing around that age. I used psychedelics at your age. You should be fine, but definitely do not do 5meo or other psychedelics often, and take great spaces inbetween for you to integrate it and let your brain rest and do its thing. My mistake was using them too often, without space inbetween and not taking care of my health and well being. It does come with its costs. For that reason I would never approve of anyone around that age using them. Still, here you are, doing your thing. Have not used 5meo dmt myself, but have tried the other DMT in a few different forms. My guess is that it doesn't compare. I wish you the best of luck brother. Yeah, hold on to your MOTHERFUCKIN horses. That, and make sure you only ever engage with the substance when you're in a great head-space, Don't take substances on a whim, only after having decided ahead of time. Make sure you're feeling physically well and your environment is great and you won't have intruders. I assume since you are well researched on the substance, you are familiar with the idea of set and setting when it comes to psychedelics?

I'll PM it to ya

Hehe, that reminds me of Pete Holmes' cartoon strips. They're not all spiritually related but they're all great imo. pardon the readability on some of them. one or two of them that aren't signed by pete might be someone elses. This is one of my favs:

Ya or Philip K Dick, lol

I love that Rupert personally works with ceramics as, i assume, an art-form. There's something really fitting about it. It's nice to know that he expresses himself as an artist beyond his talks. God, ceramics and pottery have to be one of the most beautiful and 'down to earth' artforms/mediums. You can meditate in a cave for 40 years, you can smoke 5-meo-dmt, or you can watch someone slap together one of these fuckin' badboys

Yeah these things occur. Sometimes also I have noticed during my growth, especially during phases where there is long integration or release of fairly 'deep seated' stuff, there can be periods where emotional connection and the energy to be social dissipate. Kind of like I've just felt severed from people or something. Not in a particularly depressing or negative way, just that I noticed that the heart felt feeling and sense of connection had dimmed. Also periods where I felt like I'd have to abandon all my social connections because I felt as though they were holding me back and that I'd need to start anew. Then the pendulum swings the other way, and I feel like maybe as a result of an energetic shift or something, suddenly I naturally gravitate towards my old friends again and have a great time. Really revitalizing and with newfound appreciation. Then also, some people I decide I just don't want to connect with because I don't want to get into bad habits or as you said, be drawn back into my old self. So there's some of that, too. So I think you really needn't worry. You haven't stopped resonating with people because you've outgrown them. Growing and integration doesn't negate the old, it encompasses it. You'll only be able to resonate with greater compassion in time. Worry not. You'll meet lots of cool new people who you'll appreciate and who will greatly appreciate you.

Yeah, like aurum said, at least you recognize the problem. Most guys don't realize their neediness is even repelling women. At worst they think it's a good thing and just get super bitter when the girls get repulsed. No, at least the way you're expressing it, having something 'better to do' sounds more like covering up a root issue. However not focusing on it so heavily is probably a good idea. You're going in the right direction. Life and its tragedies (like you not doing so well with her) are exposing your blind spots and burning them out of you. That's what girls do. The pain is good and you're understanding its root. Keep taking action as you're doing (and ur doing good son) and allowing your blocks and dysfunctional behaviors to come to the surface of your awareness. As long as you're aware, then they will start to untangle. In order to greatly accelerate this however, use a practice like Callums recommended Sedona method, or Vipassana, shadow work, letting go, or whatever resonates with you to allow the visceral roots of the behavior to integrate. Tip: the emotions that arise, the negative feelings, that's where the money is cos that's the way it is. integration of what holds us back is a long and exhausting process, but it's worth it

LOL damn dude what an absolute pimp. You're overthinking it. Totally normal. What is there to transcend?? Embrace your sexuality dude. If you want to have multiple relationships then just figure out how to do it. It's not impossible, and can be sustainable and you can even seriously grow as a result of it.

My friend has a two year old son who often kind of babbles or speaks gibberish. Upon observing him, it feels clear at least to me that he is communicating, but more in a feeling or energetic way than by connecting words to thought forms. More an imitation of expressions or feeling ideas that exert themselves through sound. A bit like the same way we'd act if we were to comically imitate another language by making sounds and moving our hands, but not necessarily having any particular idea in mind. This is the more natural communication, before we are stifled by words. Consider your need to label as just further energetic phenomena. Your insistence that it is limiting reality could potentially be a denial or reality, because what are your labels if not spontaneous manifestations of the moment? If you want to further surrender, stop looking as thought forms or labels as any different to birds you might see, or a colour or sound.

Posture effects the way energy moves in the body, and so it has impact on awareness and consciousness. Cross legged is a good way to sit, and if you are comfortable with it, do it that way. If you can increase flexibility and have OK knees, once you get more comfortable, try looking up videos on how to sit in half-lotus as an experiment in how a not too intense change can effect your meditation. It's a good idea to look up some basic videos on getting into even the most basic postures, especially when it comes to sitting, because we can unknowingly be putting pressure on our joints which can have accumulative negative effects over time. That being said, what is probably much more important than how you sit, is the sustainability of your practice. Therefore if you're unable to sit cross legged, then sitting on a chair, or sitting, lying, or being in ANY position is fine, and not something you need to give too much thought to. Either way I also suggest back support. As for 60m for 30m, I guess it comes down to your goals. If you're aiming for overall well-being I'd go for 30m twice a day since its effects are kind of spread throughout the day and allows two points for integrating and releasing pressure.

im north of the river

Nice bro, thank you for sharing.

hot dang you got an interesting writing style don't be dismayed by not getting what you're asking here. anyone with true self awareness and love isn't going to give you what you're asking, because they wouldn't dare rob you of your own power and reinforce the beliefs that are hurting you what are you trying to do, exactly? your aim and frame are driving you bonkers. forget the time limits, forget where you think you're supposed to be vs where you are first decide where you are is not so bad - practice gratitude then get excited about the fact that you are on this path at all - that's some serious grace. then you know that you're always improving. whatever practices you're doing, whatever map you're following or however confused you are, you know you are on the path and life is guiding you towards where you're supposed to be. you say, where I am is great, but I'm going to see just how awesome things can get. there will be some down periods but those help you even more than the good times don't compare yourself to some transcendental object, or some ideal. it's illusory dude, you're fine. with all your dysfunction and neurosis you're just fine. tend to your own heart more so you know you're actually very safe where you are. knowing that you are perfectly on the path and only being led to the greatest version of yourself: only one task remains, and that is to relax and tend to how you feel in the moment. to bring ease, relaxation and gratitude to your body. this will help to unwind your overstimulated energetic system/nervous system which is coming through in your post. ps. the 'I love you's to yourself are a good practice. the crazier your husband thinks you are, the better you're doing... probably.

read the book instead, socrates is way more badass on text. it's supposed to be a true story, too

if you say so

My perspective: Confusion and inability to make decisions come from emotional blockages. Emotional blockages come from a lack of willingness to be present with discomfort/resistance. Bare with me here: Knowing the right choice comes from intuition. Intuition is the clear still inner voice that leads us down the path of greatest expansion. Growth means having to face resistance. Paradoxically intuition always leads to the path of least resistance, but for as long as we're in the physical domain, the path of least resistance means having to face some resistance now for greatest optimization. Resistance is uncomfortable, and if you're not willing to be uncomfortable then you will never dissolve the resistance that life is asking you to move through in order to grow. Confusion is not as you think it is. It is not a lack of answers. It is merely an energetic/physiological phenomena. Confusion is just like fear, anger, grief, etc. We think of it as having special connection to the mind, intellect, etc, but it's not the case. It can be useful to rid yourself of the label of confusion. Instead, you may wish to call it resistance. Emotional blockages narrow our vision. No discomfort or resistance can be resolved with an answer - only awareness and willingness to be present with discomfort resolves it. Therefore, it is impossible to be able to discover 'answers' at the level of intellect or thought that resolve discomfort. At best, these answers only sedate the discomfort which you've labelled as confusion, but the resistance will soon return and with it your answer won't make sense anymore or you are unsure of it. When the resistance is let go of, the answer comes clearly and obviously. Often in fact, we will feel so silly for not having seen it in the first place. It seems obvious obvious obvious. 'Answers' come when the resistance has been dissolved at the being level. When people let go of their resistance, or let go of attachment, an answer comes, but the mistake they make is to assume that the answer caused the feeling of resolution and the sensation of progress. The truth is, the answer was the spontaneous emanation that arose from the shift that occurred at the more subtle being level, as a result of having dissolved resistance. You were now vibrationally compatible with ideas and energies that you were previously blind to. The shift itself is what makes you feel good and allows you to move out of the illusion of stagnation. Not the answer that was born out of it. ---- So this means when you are unsure of what to do on a subject, your aim should be to acknowledge the discomfort and resistance on the subject, and then aim to 'let it go'. We let go by accepting the experience and allowing it to be there unconditionally. You accept that it's where you are and how you feel. It is useful to accept the situation and the various ways it can turn out. On larger, 'heavier' subjects, it can take time or multiple sessions of continuing to let go and allow resistance before clarity can come in - but that's not always the case. Sometimes letting go can bring instantaneous, often miraculous results. It would be very useful for you to practically play with this idea (and I encourage you discover the truth of it for yourself) by using it on less contentious subjects. For example, you can't decide between two meals to eat. Or you don't know which movie to watch, what clothes you want to wear, who you want to hang out with today, etc. When you feel unsure on the subject and its causing you discomfort, apply the practice of unconditionally allowing the discomfort and resistance to be there. Accepting it, and the various outcomes. Accept that you may even choose the 'wrong' thing but that you'd still be okay with it. Then observe the results. You will know clarity when it comes, because it is joyous, expansive, relieving and comes with a sense of vitality. As you keep repeating this process with various difficulties in your life, you'll gain an increased sense of self-esteem and understanding. Leo's video on the subject is EXCELLENT.