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Everything posted by allislove
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I live in one place for a few years but I never experienced such thing in a bus to home. I see a street neighbor staying in the bus, the man 45-55 years old. I was talking to him before, maybe few sentences, it was half year or year ago. So, I just smiled to him. He comes to me and sits near to me (I had a free place in bus near to me). He asks: "We saw each other before?". I say: "Yes, we live on the same street". And he remembered me.. He starts like that... I am a genius philosopher... This already was a red flag to me. He says: "I go to the event about importance of...." Then one guy (maybe 25 years old) joins our conversation where I mostly not talking. This older man starts to express a lot of different strong opinions in the bus... "The main problem of our country is Christianity.... There is no God. God is a toy, if there was God I would go to hell, but I am not, I am here...." At this point I was just smiling, breathing deeply and not caring what anyone says. So, it turned out the younger guy was a church guy (I don't know how to call him properly, the people which go on the street and asks to join their churches). I felt it was really insulting to hear for younger guy. Tension was quite high in this situation. I felt older guy was so holding to these beliefs. And I was just not reacting at all. So, then on the next bus stop older guy left the bus for joining the event which he talked about. I happily wished good luck to him. Then younger guy asked me about my opinion on this situation. I happily said, I don't want to share my personal opinion in public and said nothing, just listened to the younger guy. Then, younger guy went to someone else to ask to join their church. I felt like this was a micro examine for my personal development. And I can happily put the highest score for myself. You are good Dima. I love You. Seems like I haven't reacted at all. I was just smiling, breathing, with understanding it's all me, they just on their own path. And I really happy that I don't hold to the beliefs at this point that much. Thank you Leo and everyone else. Love You.
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Just start to be grateful for everything and things will start to work out well. Today, grandmother and wife wrote to me after a short break.
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Amazing guitar play
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Somebody putting me lower energetically when I am not that high. Say, on psychedelic comedown nobody can put me lower. I am so high, because I am Source. I just understand that this is all play of Love, this is all me, I listen to people better, I have compassion to everyone. But when I am not fully align with my higher self some people who feel not that good about themselves can influence my mood. So, the solution is as always understanding. Understand, it's not someone else who is putting you down, it's your reaction on what someone says or does. It's your feeling about Yourself putting you lower since you think you are not Source which is not true. Say, somebody said what you don't like. Rather than to feel let's say guilty, investigate the feeling. Say, okay, now I feel guilty. This is right here is guilt. Then, try to understand what is guilt, does it exist at all? If we are all one, if everything is Love, is there guilt? Let guilt go, zoom out, breath deep and just feel love.
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@Raptorsin7 happy be of help.
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I want to share something which Nahm helped me to understand, grateful for that. Here's the Maslow's hierarchy of needs: So, the pyramid is quite simple. If your lower needs are not met it's harder to think about higher one. Say, if you don't have water to drink, it's hard to think about good employment. How many people on the Earth had an awakening experiences through psychedelics or meditation, self-inquiry? Let's say 1%. In other words the very top of pyramid has been reached by very little number of people around. So, if you suggest to someone go meditate for solving the issue, it's like saying nothing to other person or even worse, they just think you are insane. Everyone wants to be heard, rather than to have a solution from you, specially girls want to. So, to listen to somebody, breath deep, relax, create space for conversation, talk less, make a long pauses in conversation, even like a minute, two minutes pause is completely fine. Ideal ratio of talking you when you want to listen somebody is 10%. And when you listen somebody they tend to say from their heart. It feels really good. There is a difference between needs and wants. Try to contemplate what other people need if you want to improve conversation with them. Show that you understand their needs, you are with them with their needs, with their obstacles. That's the way of perfect conversation. And if you are experienced the top of the pyramid, you know that the pyramid is one, there is no difference between levels. But I find it useful as a relative knowledge for listening to people.
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I wanted to start the appreciation practice for some time. I think I start in now. I am grateful for my health so I can do any physical activity I want. I am grateful for my wife for every caring she did, for every intimate experience with her. I am grateful for my parents for helping me to grow in a good environment. I am grateful for my kid which is healthy and happy. I am grateful for living in the place where I live. I am grateful for having enough money for a living. I am grateful for friends, for people around me, for environment. I am grateful for having access to psychedelics, for doing meditation. I am grateful for this forum. I am grateful for every experience. I love You.
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I want to change focus of this journal. Shift focus from trying to share wisdom for the reader to contemplating my life, open up a bit, take responsibility for everything I create around, put thoughts to public, let them go, look into them and throw it away in a sense. This is a better approach for my personal growth I think. Help yourself first in other words. It's harder for me to contemplate in English, I use not that much words while writing/speaking English. It's way easier for me to contemplate in Russian. But I still think I can go deep with English too, put light on some beliefs, to let them go. Something was keeping me back from opening up here. I have a friend in real life in the forum. But I think that's even better. I don't need to care how other think. I think I don't need my friend at all, in the same way friend doesn't need my friendship, so I believe this is a really good basis for friendship. So, if you are reading it Max, I just show you a big fuck and I love you, you are me, grateful for our friendship. So, I am just going to throw what is in my head, what bothers me, what holding me back, what I resist to face in a sense. I want to post much often, so often so only I read this shit ahaha. I have a free time, need to use this opportunity, enough of preliminaries. Few weeks ago I faced loneliness again. It always was hard to me to be alone. In the past I was trying to run away from myself if I am alone, go live to friends, go to parents, find a girl as fast as possible, spending hours in social networks, having a mess in a place where I live as a result. Now it's a little different story. I enjoy my environment now. It's relativity clean since I have my robot vacuum "Monica". Sometimes I spend also hours online, but not for finding somebody to be with me in real life, just for talking with somebody, listening to the story, struggles of other people. I found amazing online Russian speaking resource for that. So, I want to feel fully complete by myself, love environment, myself, everything while living alone. I think I have a good opportunity to actualize it. My mother stopped talking to me few days ago saying it's better to not talk with me for my own good. I also stopped talking to my wife for a week or so. Mother wants me to do what she wants and I really not going to do anything unless it feels really good to me. With wife it's a little different story, I was too clingy in a time, so I wanted to make a break for some time, to give her time to rest. I also said to myself it's fine to masturbate once a week or two with no porn, otherwise I can't think about anything except to fuck some girl. I have quite serious disease with skin. It's not visible if I am with my clothes. But I think with the Path and work which I do now I know the reason why I created it to myself and it's okay for me to accept this disease, this is part of my journey as everything else. I think I feel quite happy now. Sometimes I feel lack of sex and lack of spending time with kid. I think what is really important to me is not spending time with kid but to know that kid is happy. I am pretty sure kid is happy in environment where she is now, so all is good. Few weeks ago I had one of the deepest trips so far, grateful for that. It's gonna be all good, it's all good now, it's all good always. I started to enjoy origami, making home made cappuccino in the morning (thanks friend for inspiration!), 3D printing, improving home environment. I realised I love measurement tools for solving the task in ideal way for some things, like making a tea. I went to 18km hiking this weekend, was quite nice trip, grateful for that. "giving love, feeling love... this is last thing I gonna check out before I check out"
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allislove replied to Nahm's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
It's been seven hours and fifteen days Since you took your love away... Song about going down after deep psych trip ahaha -
Happy for you my friend. Best wishes ?❤️
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We are all channeling, Shin. Mandy, all is good? Sending you love and peace.
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Always LOVE YOUr videos
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Life is the game, giant game. Before the game you have chosen the biggest moments of your life to live through. But it doesn't mean that the whole game is predetermined. Choice can be made. Focus on what you want, feel it. Then relax, do simple things which brings your a joy. On the higher level you are everything. But everything is nothing - game. And you are the only creator. In order to live what you are. Every character, every decoration in this game is you. Love your character, love your environment, love everything. Because this is all for you, this is all yours, this is you. Every character has his own unique path to live. Every character chooses by himself how he wants to live, search for love, love. Show empathy for everyone in this game. Help them if they ask for it. Because they all are you. Focus on a good stuff, give love, be it. There is no one who chooses because all is you. But there is a choice, choose what feels good, listen your heart. You wanted to play, so play, play in your ideal game. There is only now. Everything what is now is miracle. Everything is ideal. You wanted this. You made it everything for yourself because you wanted it like this. I love You. I love. Love.
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The sky is the limit
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allislove replied to traveler's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Feeling a good vibe here. From nobody to nobody, sending ♥️ -
? I did microdosing for quite a some time. I see the benefits but somehow I felt to discontinue doing it and so I did. Recently my main tools are meditation and full trips. Happy New Year ?
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Short walk in Nature This mix takes me higher
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Today I said 'goodbye' to my kid at least for a few months. I realized I still have a lot of attachments. ? Going to do few psych trips pretty soon, will see what happens. Still, I love such attachments and wanna show lovely?to everyone. ?
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Thank you, Mandy. Google Photos added the effects ☺️ BTW your last video is great, looking forward to the next one ?
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Light&Water ♥️
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"You are here in your physical bodies as extensions of Source Energy, experiencing specific contrast and coming to specific new decisions about goodness of life, and every time your experience poses a question to you - an equivalent answer is born in the experience of Source. Every time your experience poses a problem to you - an equivalent solution is born in the experience of Source. And so, because of your willingness to live and explore and experience contrast, you are giving birth to constant new rockets of desire - and All-That-Is expands because of what you are living. When it becomes your dominant intention to find good-feeling thoughts, then you become one who is most often a Vibrational Match to the Source within you, and the good feeling that will then be usually present within you is your indicator that you are fulfilling your reason for being and that you are continuing to keep up with the expansion of your own Being." - Abraham
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I am not going to think about the goals for 2020 too much. I am just going to do a dream boarding exercise every day and just try to follow a good feeling thought. Surrender to the flow of life and see what happens.
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I was thinking 2018 is the year of change. I was wrong, 2019 is a life-changing year. A few things which I've got back in 2018: • first and foremost I became a daddy • I dropped drinking alcohol • I dropped smoking weed • I started to do sport after few years break (run a half-marathon distance) • I read around 30 books (it was close to zero on the previous year) I even don't know how to describe what happened in 2019 LoL I just leave the tags here: #lsd #5-meo-dmt #shrooms #meditation #vipassana-retreat #microdosing #leo-booklist #leo-videos #leo-lp #actualized-forum Grateful for everything ? I feel 2020 is going to be even more mind-blowing. New phase is going to begin. Excited to create consciously. Happy Holidays Everyone ❤️