kag101

I just watched it for the first time. It's very deep. I do like his vision, as I can relate. "Be the change you want see in the world." Some of the things he said could be classified as "egoic" or something (such as his descriptions about sex, lol), but I like it. It's good to have ambition in life. That being said, in the second half, it becomes clear how he is too hard on himself. I used to treat myself that way. I had a lot of unprocessed emotional pain, trauma, and anger. Therapy did wonders for me in that aspect. But anyway, that was an interesting video. Thanks for recommending it! Nice! This is on my list. Thanks! I've heard it from a philosopher.

That's pretty symbolic, lol Yeah, that's probably my favorite of his more recent videos. Btw - the thumbnails of the videos are so beautiful. ' Interesting. I'll check it out. I see. I am not a native English speaker also, and there a lot of words that do not have a direct translation in my language. That can be very frustrating, especially when I am talking with someone that doesn't know English. Yeah. It was an amazing scene. I think I watched Hercules only when I was a child. I have only a vague memory of it. I'll try to watch it again =) I miss his rants videos... The laziness, fear, and depression stem from the resistance of the ego? Nice! I love concept of self-actualization. I don't understand why this video has so many dislikes. Very useful technique! I really like this one as well. Which of the ten things he mentions is your favorite? (Mine is probably: "You want existence to feel magical.)

Hello everybody, here's an update of how I am doing: My doc wants me to stop taking my sleeping pill @_@ Originally, I started taking this antipsychotic medication because of an hypomaniac episode I had last June. I am not at a very low dosage that basically all it does at that dosage is sedate and induce sleep. It seems as though there is not a lot of potential for bad effects due to long-term usage. This medication used to make me sleep way too much (12 hours), and I would kind of get the munchies. But at this dosage, I honestly don't feel that. I mean, I've been sleeping about 9 hours a day, which is more than I am used to. And after about 40 minutes of taking the medication, I do feel like eating some carbs. But it is nothing much. Most of the times a piece of bread or a cracker does it. The good thing about taking it is that, for the first time in my life, I have been able to sleep at decent time. Truth to be told, I have some bad sleeping habits. For example, I don't dim the light 2 hours before getting to bed. And I also lay on my bed once in a while during the day. I am trying to improve on that. I've been using it daily for almost a year. My doc wants me to try to sleep without it some days. I understand where he's coming from, and I agree that it is not a good idea to depend on a medication to fall asleep. Not the right time The psychiatrist told me that he expects that by our next session, I will have slept 25% of the days WITHOUT the medication. He gave some general tips, and he also said that I might sleep very late on those days, like 3 am. However, I am not in the mood for that. I am not emotionally available for that. I am in a vulnerable phase (especially due to quarantine). It is definitely something I want to get rid of in the future, but I just don't think it is the right time. "You're so weak. You're just making up excuses." -- a voice inside my head tells me. I have talked about this topic with my psychologist, and she has a similar opinion as I do. I am stressing about that more than I should. It is not urgent. Focusing on it is making me not focus on things that have a higher priority. So I will write a message to the psychiatrist telling about this. It is a relief to let that go for a while. "You're procrastinating". Shut the fuck up, little voice inside my head! My inner critic is very active, as you can see. No more pathological anxiety This is great news. I had some anxiety attacks early this year. I got very worried and upset. After I finally adapted well to an antidepressant; this bitch called pathological anxiety creeped in. It was really frustrating. But very fortunately, I discovered the cause. I am 99,9% certain of that. It was caused by a little guy named caffeine. I was drinking massive amounts of coffee, and it turns out I got very sensitive to it after I started with this med. And, seriously, this is definitely a price I am willing to pay. Much better than losing libido, gaining a bunch of weight, or sleeping too much. I haven't drunk coffee or coke since the last time I had an anxiety attack, and I'm fine. Reviewing the antidepressant I'm on at drugs.com I did it mainly because the overwhelming majority of the people who write reviews on antidepressants are the ones who had a BAD experience. The people who were successful usually do not want to talk about it. But, because this medication has helped so goddamn much, I decided to write my experience. Here it is: I got like 25 likes. The only thing that I did not like afterwards is that AVICII quote at the end. It was unnecessary. But. fuck it. At least I did it. I just read a review of a guy that said that he had hair loss due to this medication. I'm gonna ask about that to my doctor. My new powerful mantra for curing perfectionism Do It Imperfectly (D.I.I.) When I set the intention of deliberately doing something imperfectly, I do not tune in to some stupid minute details that robs my energy and momentum., Experimenting with shaving my body & getting piercing I have always wanted to experiment with those things since I was very young. But I didn't have the balls to do it. Was too shy. Last month, I had my first earring. It looks nice. I was pretty embarrassed at first, especially with my parents. But as often, it was much easier to deal with their reaction than I was imagining it to be. It's like this: As with shaving, I have shaved by now every part of my body, except armpits. And it feels good. One of the characteristics of depression is lack of self-care. One way people spiritualize this is by saying, "Oh, I don't care about worldly appearances." BS! It is healthy to care about it. The problem is that many people are obsessed with it. Anyway, an annoying thing that happened is like red dots. It itches like fuck. But I am figuring out ways to prevent this from happening. "The mind has always something to worry about."

Haha, this show is so good. I'm still in the second season, though. I hope the quality doesn't drop. This song is so heartwarming <3

Based on my personal experience, I would recommend you stop your meditation practice. I think you'd benefit much more from good psychotherapy. Mumbo-jumbo... That's great! You shouldn't want to die! As obvious as this might seem... You don't have to get rid of anything. EXACTLY! That's the trap of "enlightenment". It becomes a spiritual bypass. Dude, I have been where you are. In my case, life seemed meaningless and I found no joy in virtually anything. So I started the self-actualization/enlightenment journey as a (desperate) attempt to heal myself. I started it when I was 11 (!). It took me 14 years of trial and error to find what truly stabilized me. And it was something that was always right in front of my nose...: Science. Little did I know, I had depression and I wasn't aware of it. Only when my psychiatrist decided to gave me a medication called wellbutrin did I feel normal again. I read stuff I wrote last year, and I'm like, "OMG! Did I really feel that empty?" Also, my social anxiety simply vanished. In fact, antidepressants are the first-line treatment for social anxiety. Not exposure therapy, not meditation, not psychedelics. It is antidepressants... Looking in retrospect, all the books I read, all the meditation I did, were in a way, a waste of time. Bottom line is, I was trying to "self-medicate" my depression with those kinds of practices. I spent so much time trying to free myself, achieve higher states of consciousness. All in all, I was trying to spiritualize my mental illness. But now I understand that what made me suffer was, indeed, a chemical imbalance. Nothing more, nothing less. And that is liberating! Nothing spiritual, just chemical... And btw - you are very honest and insightful. It also seems to be that you have a high level of self-knowledge. All the best!

Do you remember why did you like it? Btw - I just watched the video of the link of your signature, and wow that was a great scene! Epic!

This video helped me get into the habit of searching for definitions. And also to search basic concepts of various fields. This is very helpful so that I can have a general grasp of economy, psychology, philosophy, etc. I usually use Wikipedia to do that.

Sorry but that doesn't sound very healthy. It seems that you're numbed out.

Friday, March 27th 2020, 2:37 PM Big Trap Impatience is certainly one of my biggest enemies in the path of self-actualization. I am very bad at putting things into perspective. That is, to see the big picture of my life. To take a moment and realize how much I have improved over the last year, 5 years, 10 years. It's been quite a ride, and I finally feel like I am heading in the right direction in life, like truly. Back to feeling how I used to as a child I feel like that joyful 7-year-old is back again. I don't mean that I am now acting as if I were 7 years old. I mean that my natural self is present. Depression completely suppresses spontaneity, so it is a huge blessing to have that back. My mind loves to nitpick Sure, there are some annoying problems but overall things are going really well. Mymind has this tendency of nitpicking each aspect of my life and see where I am not doing well. A microscope kind of thing. So it is important to sometimes take a moment to strategize for my life. That is, to reflect on how I have improved compared to the past. And what I want to be aiming for in life. Realistic expectation is a must That's why I think it is extra important to set realistic expectations. Otherwise, the chances of me getting overwhelmed and stressed out are really high. If I set in my mind a modset timeframe in which I want to accomplish something; I can have a much better sense of perspective. Reading For example, I have started to read the book "Thinking, fast and slow". It has about 600 pages. This is definitely outside of my comfort zone. I have started to get into the habit of reading on a consistent basis this year, and I have been having great results. I have read since the beginning of the year about 10 books (each one has more or less 200-250 pages). If I expect to finish this long book I am reading in the same time I did with the others, then I will surely get stressed out and anxious about that. So I set a timeframe of 1 to 3 weeks to finish it. Bottom line The most important thing is that my mental health is stabilized. Worldly problems cannot be comparable with biochemical problems in the brain. My mood has ups and downs, but they are proportional to what I am experiencing. With depression, bipolar, or even pathological anxiety; the feelings are out of proportional. And I am glad I am not feeling that. Random Thoughts > I have been thinking about ideas of tattoos. I thought about tattooing the chemical structure of my antidepressant. Lol. > I have also done an earring. I have always wanted to do that since I was a kid, but I didn't have the courage to do so. It was great. > Panic is a bitch. It leads to neurosis (excessive action). And when I focus too much on something, the results are not good.

OP is: >> Not excited for what's ahead in his life >> Not suicidal, but feels like life is a burden. >> No feeling of belongingness and joy for being a human. >> No inner freedom. He feels like a slave and imprisoned. >> Doesn't get any peace whatsoever, except when he is asleep (because he feels it is a certain type of death) This is like a textbook case of depression.

I don't stop taking it. In fact, one of the most common problems with people who start taking antidepressant is that once they start to feel better; they stop the medication. But this illness doesn't work like that. Depression, which is the cause of my social anxiety, has no cure. The medication helps me to get it under control. If I stop taking it, I will feel shitty once again; and social anxiety will creep in once again. It's just like someone who has diabetes. It has no cure, but if the person takes insulin in a correct way, the problem will not manifest. Therefore, continuous use is required. I spent MANY years trying to overcome it through all sorts of alternative methods, such as affirmations, visualization, yoga, psychedelics, cannabis, meditation, comfort zone challenges; but none of which were effective in the long run. In fact, they did much more harm than good. If I had only sought a high-quality traditional treatment 10 years ago, I wouldn't have suffered so much.

Interesting. Thanks for sharing.

Seek professional help. You are sick. The chemicals in your brain are out of balance. What you described is a classic description of clinical depression. Well, from this, we can say that at least you don't have suicidal tendencies. So, if you don't treat your depression adequately, you'll live 60 more years in a distorted version of reality. I like this analogy: depression is like wearing a glass with which you can only see B&W. Even though other people tell you about the beautiful colors of the world, you can't see it. But just because you don't see it, that doesn't mean colors don't exist. I've been there. For many years I was a prisoner of depression. And it was a battle that was impossible to win by myself. Medication was a must for me. Yeap. The same with me. Sleep was the only time that I could have a break from my endless mental chattery & rumination. @Mikael89 @Red-White-Light I hope you guys get better! I know how painful it is to be in that place! But there is hope, because science works!

“Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence” --Carl Sagan

By the way you're trying to "enlighten" me, as if you were in the "Now", and you know that I am steps behind you. Eckhart Tolle does a lot of that. I find it very irritating, because it is as if he was in the pedestal of the "Now". He has entered the Ultimate Reality, and all the people who are listening to him are lost in the "egoic mind". So he says something to effect of: "There is no past or future, the only thing that exists is the (deep tone of voice) Now. You see? This moment. Not that what you're thinking, but the Eternal...... NOW." He basically tries to make people enter the "portal" of the present moment. From my personal experience, the people who speak the most about being in the present are the ones who are the least in touch with it.

I don't justify it. I am aware of the suffering it causes. I am not a hypocrite. I was a vegan for 4 years. And I used to have a feeling of moral superiority over people who eat meat.

I wouldn't say I am "cured" from Social Anxiety, but it is certainly tamed. I fought this demon for more than a decade. I'd win some fights here and there, but it was clear that I was losing the war. In my case, I came to the conclusion that my SAD was directly related to my untreated clinical depression. So, as soon as I started to take an antidepressant that was effective for me, social anxiety simply disappeared -- like magic. Now, I feel like myself once again. My natural self. Sure, there are some aspects that I am still working on with my psychotherapist, but the pathological aspect of shyness is gone. I now actually look forward to stepping out of my comfort zone. Before, that would be torture. But now it feels more like an adventure.

Hopefully not.

Without imposing duality, there is nothing. There is no Yin without Yang. Proven record? I'd like for you to show me that. Or are you talking about online testimonials? There are bad psychiatrists, and there are good psychiatrists. Like in any other profession. Which resources are you referring? I honestly don't remember because people in this topic have mentioned dozens of them. I have experimented with plenty of "alternative" (aka not proven) resources. I'd get better for a while, and then... BAM... I'd hit rock bottom once again. Sounds like you haven't figured out that you're being really condescending. Thank you They are the best chance someone have to get better. Sure, you might come across with a bad professional. Then, you have to keep searching. Which variables? Are you implying that because I noticed that you were projecting something onto me; that means I am also projecting something onto you? What things am I rejecting? Why do you think that is so? Idk who the guy you quoted said, but yeah... psychiatry can certainly be a life-changing thing for those who really need it (like myself).

Omg... that's soooo neurotic. My suggestion: install Tinder and go out with "unattractive" girls, so that you practice. If you think you can get "HBs" right off the bat, then you're bound to fail. It's like learning how to play the piano. You have to start with simple and easy songs. Master the basics. If a beginner tries to play, for example, Hungarian Rhapsody N. 2 (which is a very difficult piece), it's definitely not going to work.

Yes!

No, don't fool yourself.

It seems like you're suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder. What do you think?

“Do you want to improve the world? I don't think it can be done. The world is sacred. It can't be improved. If you tamper with it, you'll ruin it. If you treat it like an object, you'll lose it. There is a time for being ahead, a time for being behind; a time for being in motion, a time for being at rest; a time for being vigorous, a time for being exhausted; a time for being safe, a time for being in danger. The Master sees things as they are, without trying to control them. She lets them go their own way, and resides at the center of the circle.” ― Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching