kag101

Cool! But like, does she make interesting observations or questions once in a while? I've had therapists who would nod their head and fake empathy. I personally like free-association therapy. there's an app that helps me a lot and they use some concepts of CBT to identify inconsistencies in negative thoughts. it's really interesting. it's called Moodtools. best of luck!

No, I didn't read the books. I've seen Leo's videos about it, and I did some research online as well. I mean, it's kinda interesting. But people here take it to an extreme. They start categorizing people, and I don't think it's in a healthy way. I also don't like that it's like if I want to be "green", I have to vote for Bernie Sanders, not really care about money, be a hippie, and go to ayahuasca ceremonies.

That's good to hear. With me, it has been the opposite. I am more anxious now.

woooow! you're so fucking awake, man! do you want a trophy?

I don't like SD, because I don't think it is accurate and people take it way too seriously.

3:43 PM Lactose intolerant? Lately I have been having flatulence. It's really annoying and unpleasant. I did a test and stopped drinking soda, but I had that problem either way. So I am 95% sure that it is due to dairy, unfortunately. That sucks. I don't know how much dairy will I have to cut to get better. For example, I have noticed in the past that ice cream is terrible for me. It messes up with my digestive system. And also, before I turned vegan, I was a vegetarian. But the thing was, I was consuming A LOT of cheese and things like that, and it was terrible for my digestion and everything. Anyway, cutting dairy is a pain-in-the-ass, but I'm sure "I will survive". I mean I was a hardcore vegan for 4-fucking-years, reducing 80% of the dairy I consume won't be the end of the world. Intention: So, in the next following days, I will avoid dairy as much as I can. And I will try not to be extremist. To succeed in this, I will go to the market tomorrow and buy other types of milk (almond, soy, cashew, etc.) They're pretty expensive though. Sleeping pill There is one medication that I was originally using as an antipsychotic, but because it has a very potent sedative effect, it has helped me regulate my sleep as well. I am at a very low dosage, so in this case this med acts only as sleeping inducing. Yeah, I know... it's not good to depend on a medication to fall asleep. But truth to be told, I have never woken up past noon after I started using it. A lot of my friends, especially during this quarantine period, have been waking up at like 3 pm. Sorry, but to me that's not life. There was a time that I would wake up at 5 pm. And that's simply depressing. Another benefit from this med is that I can control what time will I fall asleep. I really don't get sleepy without it. So if one day I need to be awaken till late night, I don't need coffee for example. "Let's stop it" My psychiatrist wants me to stop it. He suggested that I don't use it some days of the week. At first, I thought I definitely needed to that. But I had resistance. As a self-help junkie, what do I told myself? "You're being complacent and lazy! You need to change this habit NOW!" Fortunately, I am getting vaccinated against these types of neurotic thoughts thanks to psychotherapy. Truth is, I was spending so much energy on this, that I was not focusing on things that are more important. Negotiating with him He also recommended a series of sleep hygiene recommendations. So we decided that, for now, I will continue with the medication, but I will focus on implementing those new sleeping habits. Basically, there are two that I need to improve: 1) Use bed only to sleep I tend to spend too much time in my room, and I am often laying down. So over the last few weeks, I have been avoiding not only laying on my bed during the day, but also to not be in my room. I love my room and everything. It is my "sacred space". But if I spend too much time there, it can turn into something toxic. When I stay there for too long, I start getting negative and repetitive thoughts. So I am limiting as much as I can how much time I spend there. But, again, nothing extreme. If I manage to reduce the time I am in my room by 50% during this first month, that's already good enough. It is a process, so it should be gradual. I shouldn't demonize my room. 2) Dim the lights 2 hours before sleeping. I have never taken this much in consideration, especially because they say you "shouldn't" use your phone or laptop 2 hours before sleeping. Well, at least where I'm at right now, this is just too unrealistic. But, again, I can adapt it as a "harm reduction" type of thing. So here's what I'm doing: a) Dim the lights, in fact I want to buy an adapter so that I can control the brightness of the light in my room. b) I avoid using electronic devices, but sometimes I do use them. In that case, I make sure the brightness is low and the content I am consuming is light. So instead of watching a horror movie, I watch a sitcom or something like that.

Care to elaborate on that?

Yes, meditation can help quiet the mind. But in some cases, especially when done excessively, it can lead to the opposite. So you're saying "not attached to any outcome"? I don't care what you say. Nobody should want to die. End of story. How can someone cut attachment to happiness? And why would it be beneficial to do that? That's great, man!! ??? I hope it's a good therapist. Best of luck, and keep us posted!!

what did you get from this video besides thinking Leo is awesome? haha

Haha, that's a classic. I tried that technique with a girl once, but it didn't really work, lol.

I agree with her.

Is that supposed to be a joke?

Have you ever considered going to a psychiatrist?

You didn't offend me. I just think that whole "Don't think about anything. Just be in the Now" pretty annoying. I just don't find it to be effective. I mean, yes, reminding oneself to be in the present moment is a great thing. Most of us are lost in planning or thinking about the past. I meditate daily (focusing on the breath), so I am pretty aware of how the mind tends to wander off. But that is not the answer to all psychological problems. And thanks, I wish you well as well. True psychology works. Its practice and education is guided by research findings that are firmly grounded in the scientific method. Get back to work? What do you mean by that? Literally working at a job? Why do you think psychotherapy doesn't "tackle the issue once and for all"? To me, it is exactly what it does. Resonating with the psychotherapist is very important, but that's not enough. It's expensive, and it's also hard to find a good psychotherapist. Lol, this method has a 100% success rate "from your experience"? Sorry but that doesn't prove much of its effectiveness. I certainly prefer the first option. And, btw, how can you prove me that life is an illusion? I definitely don't want to go in the route of "spirituality". I was there for many years, and it only made me feel miserable. At one point in my life, I was meditating 4 hours a day. I was putting too much expectation on meditation - as if it were something that would magically solve all problems. Ever since I started psychological and psychiatric treatment, I have never been happier and more fulfilled in my life. After more than a decade of suffering and getting disappointed by alternative methods, I feel like I am finally in the direction of truly actualizing my full potential. It's a fabulous feeling. Yeah... It's a paradox. It's repetitive, and it makes the "present moment" look something out-of-this world. It's actually very simple. I really think there's something fishy about Tolle.

What makes you think you're not depressed? Yes, to me, it's pretty clear that this is the case here. No, technically it is not. Clinical depression is a very specific and well-defined thing. Other factors can trigger it. But depression is a whole different thing from sadness, stress, or grief. No, it won't. But at least the individual will not be a slave to the illness. This way, the "natural self" can break free, and manifest once again. Yeah, suffering can be addictive.

Wow, that's an interesting coincidence... Did you tell this concern of yours to the doctor? I don't think meditation is very effective for social anxiety. In my case, it made it worse, actually. I would get even more "internalized", more self-conscious (in the negative sense). This sounds too theoretical and unrealistic. So I "shouldn't" use should statements? Lol Ok, that's great. How many % of the population can achieve that state? Smoking weed, in the long-term, was terrible for my social anxiety. I am so glad I got rid of it. I agree. I like that. It reminds me of the book: "The subtle art of not giving a fuck."

I just watched it for the first time. It's very deep. I do like his vision, as I can relate. "Be the change you want see in the world." Some of the things he said could be classified as "egoic" or something (such as his descriptions about sex, lol), but I like it. It's good to have ambition in life. That being said, in the second half, it becomes clear how he is too hard on himself. I used to treat myself that way. I had a lot of unprocessed emotional pain, trauma, and anger. Therapy did wonders for me in that aspect. But anyway, that was an interesting video. Thanks for recommending it! Nice! This is on my list. Thanks! I've heard it from a philosopher.

That's pretty symbolic, lol Yeah, that's probably my favorite of his more recent videos. Btw - the thumbnails of the videos are so beautiful. ' Interesting. I'll check it out. I see. I am not a native English speaker also, and there a lot of words that do not have a direct translation in my language. That can be very frustrating, especially when I am talking with someone that doesn't know English. Yeah. It was an amazing scene. I think I watched Hercules only when I was a child. I have only a vague memory of it. I'll try to watch it again =) I miss his rants videos... The laziness, fear, and depression stem from the resistance of the ego? Nice! I love concept of self-actualization. I don't understand why this video has so many dislikes. Very useful technique! I really like this one as well. Which of the ten things he mentions is your favorite? (Mine is probably: "You want existence to feel magical.)

Hello everybody, here's an update of how I am doing: My doc wants me to stop taking my sleeping pill @_@ Originally, I started taking this antipsychotic medication because of an hypomaniac episode I had last June. I am not at a very low dosage that basically all it does at that dosage is sedate and induce sleep. It seems as though there is not a lot of potential for bad effects due to long-term usage. This medication used to make me sleep way too much (12 hours), and I would kind of get the munchies. But at this dosage, I honestly don't feel that. I mean, I've been sleeping about 9 hours a day, which is more than I am used to. And after about 40 minutes of taking the medication, I do feel like eating some carbs. But it is nothing much. Most of the times a piece of bread or a cracker does it. The good thing about taking it is that, for the first time in my life, I have been able to sleep at decent time. Truth to be told, I have some bad sleeping habits. For example, I don't dim the light 2 hours before getting to bed. And I also lay on my bed once in a while during the day. I am trying to improve on that. I've been using it daily for almost a year. My doc wants me to try to sleep without it some days. I understand where he's coming from, and I agree that it is not a good idea to depend on a medication to fall asleep. Not the right time The psychiatrist told me that he expects that by our next session, I will have slept 25% of the days WITHOUT the medication. He gave some general tips, and he also said that I might sleep very late on those days, like 3 am. However, I am not in the mood for that. I am not emotionally available for that. I am in a vulnerable phase (especially due to quarantine). It is definitely something I want to get rid of in the future, but I just don't think it is the right time. "You're so weak. You're just making up excuses." -- a voice inside my head tells me. I have talked about this topic with my psychologist, and she has a similar opinion as I do. I am stressing about that more than I should. It is not urgent. Focusing on it is making me not focus on things that have a higher priority. So I will write a message to the psychiatrist telling about this. It is a relief to let that go for a while. "You're procrastinating". Shut the fuck up, little voice inside my head! My inner critic is very active, as you can see. No more pathological anxiety This is great news. I had some anxiety attacks early this year. I got very worried and upset. After I finally adapted well to an antidepressant; this bitch called pathological anxiety creeped in. It was really frustrating. But very fortunately, I discovered the cause. I am 99,9% certain of that. It was caused by a little guy named caffeine. I was drinking massive amounts of coffee, and it turns out I got very sensitive to it after I started with this med. And, seriously, this is definitely a price I am willing to pay. Much better than losing libido, gaining a bunch of weight, or sleeping too much. I haven't drunk coffee or coke since the last time I had an anxiety attack, and I'm fine. Reviewing the antidepressant I'm on at drugs.com I did it mainly because the overwhelming majority of the people who write reviews on antidepressants are the ones who had a BAD experience. The people who were successful usually do not want to talk about it. But, because this medication has helped so goddamn much, I decided to write my experience. Here it is: I got like 25 likes. The only thing that I did not like afterwards is that AVICII quote at the end. It was unnecessary. But. fuck it. At least I did it. I just read a review of a guy that said that he had hair loss due to this medication. I'm gonna ask about that to my doctor. My new powerful mantra for curing perfectionism Do It Imperfectly (D.I.I.) When I set the intention of deliberately doing something imperfectly, I do not tune in to some stupid minute details that robs my energy and momentum., Experimenting with shaving my body & getting piercing I have always wanted to experiment with those things since I was very young. But I didn't have the balls to do it. Was too shy. Last month, I had my first earring. It looks nice. I was pretty embarrassed at first, especially with my parents. But as often, it was much easier to deal with their reaction than I was imagining it to be. It's like this: As with shaving, I have shaved by now every part of my body, except armpits. And it feels good. One of the characteristics of depression is lack of self-care. One way people spiritualize this is by saying, "Oh, I don't care about worldly appearances." BS! It is healthy to care about it. The problem is that many people are obsessed with it. Anyway, an annoying thing that happened is like red dots. It itches like fuck. But I am figuring out ways to prevent this from happening. "The mind has always something to worry about."

Haha, this show is so good. I'm still in the second season, though. I hope the quality doesn't drop. This song is so heartwarming <3

Based on my personal experience, I would recommend you stop your meditation practice. I think you'd benefit much more from good psychotherapy. Mumbo-jumbo... That's great! You shouldn't want to die! As obvious as this might seem... You don't have to get rid of anything. EXACTLY! That's the trap of "enlightenment". It becomes a spiritual bypass. Dude, I have been where you are. In my case, life seemed meaningless and I found no joy in virtually anything. So I started the self-actualization/enlightenment journey as a (desperate) attempt to heal myself. I started it when I was 11 (!). It took me 14 years of trial and error to find what truly stabilized me. And it was something that was always right in front of my nose...: Science. Little did I know, I had depression and I wasn't aware of it. Only when my psychiatrist decided to gave me a medication called wellbutrin did I feel normal again. I read stuff I wrote last year, and I'm like, "OMG! Did I really feel that empty?" Also, my social anxiety simply vanished. In fact, antidepressants are the first-line treatment for social anxiety. Not exposure therapy, not meditation, not psychedelics. It is antidepressants... Looking in retrospect, all the books I read, all the meditation I did, were in a way, a waste of time. Bottom line is, I was trying to "self-medicate" my depression with those kinds of practices. I spent so much time trying to free myself, achieve higher states of consciousness. All in all, I was trying to spiritualize my mental illness. But now I understand that what made me suffer was, indeed, a chemical imbalance. Nothing more, nothing less. And that is liberating! Nothing spiritual, just chemical... And btw - you are very honest and insightful. It also seems to be that you have a high level of self-knowledge. All the best!

Do you remember why did you like it? Btw - I just watched the video of the link of your signature, and wow that was a great scene! Epic!

This video helped me get into the habit of searching for definitions. And also to search basic concepts of various fields. This is very helpful so that I can have a general grasp of economy, psychology, philosophy, etc. I usually use Wikipedia to do that.

Sorry but that doesn't sound very healthy. It seems that you're numbed out.

Friday, March 27th 2020, 2:37 PM Big Trap Impatience is certainly one of my biggest enemies in the path of self-actualization. I am very bad at putting things into perspective. That is, to see the big picture of my life. To take a moment and realize how much I have improved over the last year, 5 years, 10 years. It's been quite a ride, and I finally feel like I am heading in the right direction in life, like truly. Back to feeling how I used to as a child I feel like that joyful 7-year-old is back again. I don't mean that I am now acting as if I were 7 years old. I mean that my natural self is present. Depression completely suppresses spontaneity, so it is a huge blessing to have that back. My mind loves to nitpick Sure, there are some annoying problems but overall things are going really well. Mymind has this tendency of nitpicking each aspect of my life and see where I am not doing well. A microscope kind of thing. So it is important to sometimes take a moment to strategize for my life. That is, to reflect on how I have improved compared to the past. And what I want to be aiming for in life. Realistic expectation is a must That's why I think it is extra important to set realistic expectations. Otherwise, the chances of me getting overwhelmed and stressed out are really high. If I set in my mind a modset timeframe in which I want to accomplish something; I can have a much better sense of perspective. Reading For example, I have started to read the book "Thinking, fast and slow". It has about 600 pages. This is definitely outside of my comfort zone. I have started to get into the habit of reading on a consistent basis this year, and I have been having great results. I have read since the beginning of the year about 10 books (each one has more or less 200-250 pages). If I expect to finish this long book I am reading in the same time I did with the others, then I will surely get stressed out and anxious about that. So I set a timeframe of 1 to 3 weeks to finish it. Bottom line The most important thing is that my mental health is stabilized. Worldly problems cannot be comparable with biochemical problems in the brain. My mood has ups and downs, but they are proportional to what I am experiencing. With depression, bipolar, or even pathological anxiety; the feelings are out of proportional. And I am glad I am not feeling that. Random Thoughts > I have been thinking about ideas of tattoos. I thought about tattooing the chemical structure of my antidepressant. Lol. > I have also done an earring. I have always wanted to do that since I was a kid, but I didn't have the courage to do so. It was great. > Panic is a bitch. It leads to neurosis (excessive action). And when I focus too much on something, the results are not good.