Azrael

The first time you do it you might get extremely frightened. I guess my first 20mg trip was to this day the trip with most terror and fear and purging I have experienced so far. But it was also one of the trips that was the most helpful. Basically for me, it goes like this: In the beginning you'll feel strange sensations going through your body. You know something is coming on. In that period I'm mostly repeating a mantra like ("I AM, I SURRENDER, I LOVE") and focus on something I really like. Then at some point I am not able to say the mantra any more because my mental apparatus vanishes, and that's when I know it's coming. At that time you might have a big body load, your heart's beating like shit and your breath is going to 0. In the first experiences this feels like physically dying. Because you are going away and you don't know whether this is for real. Now, after doing it for sometime the transition still is a little bit difficult, but not all like it was in the beginning. So over time, you'll learn to handle it. Also, my pulse now doesn't go through the rooftop any more. When you are on the other side, you are as relaxed, chilled, focused and lost in infinity as you can be. So then, it feels like 1000 hours of holidays per minute. EDIT: Actually, I think I will experiment a lot in the future with this transition phase. Because I think that is the point where you can get a lot of permanent change in your daily life. When you learn to handle this phase so good and do it so often that it becomes second nature, you'll naturally rest in an infinite state. But it takes some guts to do this.

I'd say - but I'm probably a little bit conservative and strategic thinking with this one - at least a few months. Simply for the reason that 5-MeO-DMT won't help you much if you have no practice to integrate these experiences. If you just do drugs and then go off doing whatever you are doing, you won't help yourself much with it. 5-MeO-DMT is kinda like this nitro booster you have in these car games (at least when I was little they had this). You can push a button and get intense acceleration and speed. Well, you can only use that if you have a good car. And meditation (or the practice in general) is your car.

It's even crazier than that. You realize that you chose and choose every program, every situation, every action and reaction that ever occurred for you. You see that you did that in a kind of super-conscious way. When you become conscious of yourself as God you see that this infinite potential is self-aware. And you just say that you "did certain things" and that other things "happened to you" because you are unaware that BOTH are chosen by you in this super-conscious way. It's hard to put in words. But because of that you instantly begin to trust yourself and everything that happens in your life because even though you might not understand it rationally it is all yourself. And this brings forth a kind of stillness and relaxation in every negative and positive thing that occurs because you know that it stems from you. Picture it that way: Everything you know (your perceptions, thoughts, your attitude, EVERYTHING) is like a veil that colours a self-aware infinite potential of things that can arise. It can complicate itself, it can and does create all kinds of realities that for example shape a human perspective. Now this human perspective by design has some features like being aware of itself, being able to perceive and so on. On the other hand there are things in this perspective that that seem to be separate from the human being (simply because the centralized feeling and effort of doing something doesn't go as far as feeling the door next to you in egoic consciousness). Because of that design you think that this is not you - because you can't "control it". it's the same thing with the things that happen to you. Now remember, that what the human being calls himself and what is not in his "direct control" still stems from this infinite potential that just made up this reality for kicks. And it decides and shapes whatever is happening and it can't be any other way by design. And you and everybody else is ultimately that potential that makes all these realities. So you chose super-consciously to be miserable or to wake up. That's why every fear you have, every hope and every struggle is made by yourself and can't be any other way. And if you see this for yourself, it's like waking up out of a nightmare and knowing everything is fine. You can never die, because you were never born in the first place. What you are experiencing right now is a dual dream state in which you got lost. When your dream state ends, you rest in total infinite self-aware peace until another dream will pop again in which you play your role. I think this is the best way I can put it. It's still a picture and a finite, wrong subset of what really goes on, but it gives you a hint in which direction to look.

I've found that meditations at night are more probable to be breakthrough experiences than the morning meditations. It's probably because of the brain chemicals that your brain releases at night and that its easier to relax and so on. So yeah, do it at night. I always meditate in the morning and do sometimes an additional one at night right before I go sleep. Its beautiful.

Maybe read my trip reports if you want an in-depth description about what the dosages do. There is nothing in the MeO experience that is not intense. It is by far the most intense thing you can do. Simply for the reason because YOU die and you think that you are you and not unity and this will freak you out like shit in the beginning.

@dice I doubt that 5-MeO-DMT will help you with chronic fatigue. Maybe it would if your symptoms come from suppressed emotions that then could be worked through with the 5-MeO, but that's not more then a hypothesis. I got a few dudes asking me whether they should take 5-MeO to cure their problems and I told them all that it's probably total overkill. But maybe I'm wrong, maybe it can help with minor things (and I use the word minor here in relation to a full liberation). It is a very exciting experiment, so if you wanna do it, I'd suggest to follow a few guidelines. Read up on psychedelics and what they can used for and how you use them Do a few experiments with mushrooms, vary the dosage from low to your threshhold Read up specifically on 5-MeO and what it does Then experiment with it, start low and get to your threshold I would be very interested in your case. So if you do experiment with these substances, please post it here. There is not enough quality data on 5-MeO in particular. But as I said, maybe it's overkill and maybe you're projecting something into it that it is not. It's not a cure-all. Its a very specific tool. But do experiment and find out for yourself. Be careful and wise in your investigation.

No, it was 100% me. It was completely authentic and completely intimate. Imagine it like everything that you know as you is taken from you, every aspect, every feature, every fear, every hope, but something still remains. And that which remains and that what is ever-present in every situation is you. It's just that in your day-to-day world you like to play with all of your features and get completely lost. Interestingly, in the end of my experience I knew that my old self - my patterns and beliefs - would be coming back and this was fine for me, because in that moment I experienced authentically that everything is okay and everything is fine, so I can play in my daily world every game of "the world might end" but in the end it is a joke. You also understand why we play these games. Just put yourself into the position of God. You are everything and anything, all patterns that is and ever can be. You begin to play with it, make love to it, fight with it and completely get lost. And even when you forget yourself completely it doesn't matter because in the end it's just fine. It's just God playing all sorts of games with himself for kicks. And that's a lot of fun. Yeah, if I wanted. I chose however to melt with the experience and so have periods of 5-10 minutes in which I just sat, nothing inside moved a millimetre and I experienced eternity alone. Then a thought would kick - actually a pretty random one like "what am i going to cook later" and I would for example take my glass of water, look at it and then melted again for some time. It's very beautiful. Yeah, it sounds more special and crazy then it really is. It is that of course if you look with your normal understanding of things on it. But when you experience it, it seems completely obvious and basic. Basically, what you find out is that you and your live got lost in fairytales and stories and that that is your problem. And the actual game of overcoming this, is indeed a game you want to play with yourself, like every other. And this is fine and will go on as long as you want to do it that way. So you gain a shit load of trust in what is happening. You also lose the fear "that you might not get it". Because even enlightenment and all the rest is just games we play with ourselves. A real master has seen through that, recognized the beauty and does what live gives him to do. He shapes and makes it and works with it, not against it and not to overcome it. He uses it to transform it into something else. Do that, and you'll be fine. But because we are all little kiddies who like to play and pretend, it takes some time to get there. And that's fine. There's no rush.

Naah, it's more like this: Consider every perception you have of your day-to-day reality as a certain program that plays its part. Like for example the way you walk, the way you talk, the words you use, the way you use your body, the way you do your things, everything in fact that happens in your subjective view. Now, think back as good as you can - maybe meditate on this - how you added all of these programs over time when you grew up. You heard people talk and copied it, you learned to use your body, you learned to use your mind etc. In a 5-MeO-DMT experience every one of these programs you inhabit slowly begins to vanish until you have a raw view of reality. And in that very moment it becomes totally obvious that you are one with everything that exists and that everything stems from an infinite potential of things that can happen. And you realize that you and everything you know is fundamentally that. You just tricked yourself into believing that you are a certain set of your programs because they come up so regularly and it feels like you are that. But when all of these vanish and you are still there, you instantly recognize who you are and that you always were. It's quite overwhelming to just fathom that, because you would've never thought that you are that crazy. Now, another thing. In the experience you can still move and you might have some some thoughts. I had a few come up but not a lot. Most of the experience was complete stillness and I just looked at an object that looked like it always looked, but because my mental apparatus was gone it made a complete different expression on me. Hope, that makes some sense.

It's actually not that interesting to watch. Imagine somebody sniffing it, then sitting down and being a little nervous for a few minutes and when you're on the other side you are mostly still, I sometimes didn't move for 5-10 minutes at all, not even my eyes (which is insane). Then when you come back you might be talking to yourself out loud, laughing crying, being astonished and so on. It is fun however to be with somebody who takes psychedelics and leading him through the experience if you had a lot yourself and know what is happening to him. I did that a few times and it was always very pleasant for the other one and for myself. Especially if it's the first time and you have somebody who is very experienced. It can take a lot of stress.

It's definitely possible. It's possible even with shrooms. If you really wanna dive deep with psychedelics, it is important to have it all planned out. That's why I emphasize researching this stuff so much. It's also important to have some negative or very strong experiences to know how to handle those. In retrospect, all the psychedelic experiences that really shaped me in the long-term were at least emotionally heavy, explosive and transformative. They maybe ended in a nice calming resting no-self but to heal yourself something's gotta die. So, what you'll find out with most psychedelic substances is that there is a threshold, a point, and when you cross that point you go from having a super explosive and crazy experience to being not able to control yourself anymore. Complete loss of motor functions, of rational thinking. Plan for that. I have for every substance I take a plan with which I can get myself out of the trip (or let's say out of the overwhelming shit) in 15-30 minutes. That's important. Because when I induce these threshold experiences that are the most beneficial to me they can either be very pleasant and overwhelming or the other way around. And you want to have a plan to end this. But to be earnest, I also had to learn that the hard way. So learn out of my experiences. When I did LSD for about a year I decided one day to take 450ug. I normally take 350-400 to have a really deep experience but this time I shot over the top and my friends had to help me calm down and shit. This was - however - one of my deepest experiences I ever had and I would be even willing to induce such a negative experience again when somebody is around and can watch me. But if you trip alone for spiritual exploration - as I do - have some counter measures. A start is having some carbohydrates, sugar, a coffee, a cigarette, and a cold shower ready if you need it. Ends most trips in 15-30 minutes or at least brings you to a state of being able to control it again.

Yeah, could be. But I would be very careful with that. In my experience you could also fuck yourself up pretty deeply if you do it and have no idea how to interpret it. Because you will interpret it either way, when you come back. That's why I don't share with people where you get MeO, or why I say that you at least should have a meditation habit going for some while and some experiences with other psychedelics like shrooms or normal DMT. You don't wanna fly outer space if you never sat in a plane. Also, you should be informed what this is really doing to you. Anything that can have a big beneficial long-term effect on your brain and psyche can also have the same negative effect if you use it wrongly. For example I was very shocked how much the breakthrough impacted my thresholds with other psychedelics. I did a 3g shroom trip in December, 2016 and it was by far one of my deepest shroom experiences, good and bad. Before MeO I did 5g shrooms and had a very insightful deep experience (I posted the trip report on the forum) but it wasn't even comparable with the intensity of the last one. Fucking crazy.

Nope, you can drink it (it's brown powder) with some juice like 10-15 minutes before you do the 5-MeO. It'll bring your attention in your body, makes you calm but also very motivated, concentrated and just ready for the experience. @Leo Gura suggested it to me and I tried it. For me, both are a perfect match and make a very nice experience.

Maybe so, we have to investigate this with enough people to be sure. What I've experienced so far is more gain in awareness from one breakthrough dose then 2 years of prior meditation (and I had a couple of deep enlightenment experiences before MeO). A lot more then that. For me, that's completely insane. I also know for myself that it'll permanently liberate me if I do another 10-15 breakthrough trips of this. It's just, that you need the time and focus to do it and the time to integrate it. You can't just do it and run off, or you'll be fucked.

No, I don't think so. I guess he took like 10 and was through with the topic. I guess I wrote with @Leo Gura about this in the past and he mentioned it. Maybe you can clarify this one, Leo. Yeah, but you mix two different coups here. Being fully liberated doesn't mean you quit your whole character and loose your juice. It'll probably open you up (at least this is my experience from temporary enlightenment experiences and the integration after it) but it doesn't make you to a "I'm all nice and love all ppl"-kinda guy. Go to a Zen monastery and meet some very rude enlightened masters that beat the shit out of you and scream at you (of course this has its purpose). From my experience 5-MeO in particular has the deepest and most transforming long-term effect compared to all other psychedelics. I'd list them in this order (starting high, getting low): 1. 5-MeO-DMT, 2. Shrooms, 3. DMT, 4. LSD. But that's just from my personal 2-year experience with like 10-20 trips of acid, 20-30 DMT trips, a few shroom trips and a few MeO ones. But MeO is by far the deepest. It breaks something in your brain so that it must rewire in a more complex fashion to stand this experience (at least that is what it feels like). Meditation on steroids flying through outer space with a warp engine. No doubt Ruper Spira or Eckhart Tolle or Shinzen Young are perfect examples of the enlightened, chilled, empathic kind of person. But I would bet with you that they were kind of chilled and friendly even before they had there experience. It then just deepened this character trait.

Yeah, that's true. You gotta be very careful not delude yourself with any of this stuff: meditation, self-observation, psychedelics. The fact is, you are self-deluding yourself most of the time for ego-purposes. That's the whole problem. With 5-MeO you very quickly feel that it has an qualitative different effect then any drug you've taken before. First of all, it feels clean and endogenous, well that's probably because it's produced in your brain. But normal DMT also has this effect. Furthermore, the MeO experience doesn't add something to your experience as all the other drugs do, it gets rid of something. And this is the critical point and also the point that is so overwhelming and strange. It just gets rid of you. And when you have this for the first time and can see it clearly that there is no you and that you are infinite, there is no doubt. Especially interesting is how you "the ego" slowly come back after the experience. It's very sneaky. I can't of convey in words that I am right or that this is so, you just have to try it for yourself if you wanna find it out and see it for yourself.

Nope, I haven't so far, but I always play a very certain piece of very relaxing music in the background. It's one of my psychedelic tripping pieces. But that's just for the atmosphere. I have no problems recalling the experience after it in the sense that it'll come if I want it or not. And it'll also transform my hugely. It always does. The last time I did it, I needed until know to really integrate it. Now, I begin to feel to be able to go further. Did you have a breakthrough yet? That seems to make an lasting impression on you.

Yeah, I use HoloSync now for 5 months. I can recreate a part of the MeO-experience in meditation especially so in the days right after the experience.

That's a completely normal human behaviour pattern, don't worry. It'll go away with time. Everybody has this - unless you're an arrogant, narcissistic piece of shit. Just imagine you'd play with violin and for a few weeks and had the chance to go play with an real orchestra. The first few weeks and probably months you go play with them you won't feel that good because you are aware that there are people who do this for 30+ years. It's the same in most of the other fields in which you can be skilful or experienced. And it's also a way to make more progress faster. Who do you think will grow faster? The ambitious newbie who is together with a few experts or the few experts that are together with a newbie. It will be the newbie.

For the simple reason that it would be so nice to start as a blank slate, experience multiple lives and dimensions and love, hate, religion, science, drama and all that, go through that and carry a little bit of that around with you, forget yourself, remember yourself again and then blow up after some time completely and go to the next level. And this for ever and ever and ever. And the forgetting of oneself would make this journey quite unique every time you reach a new level. ... but I'm obviously dreaming here

I've meditated quite some time on the question of rebirth. In the beginning on my investigation I had quite some problems with the idea because there seems to be one point in this paradigm that is "wuu-huu". And that is: "How can your consciousness transform into another body when you're dead?" That just seems new-age, doesn't it? Well, it seems that way when you're very convinced that you were popped in this physical universe at some point, developed yourself over time, made your free choices and did your thing. When you live in that kind of world, it indeed seems new-age and like wishful thinking. But when you look at it again with some openness, you'll discover some obvious things. If you "the person - the individual" were popped into this world when you were born, there must be something that did that, right? Some mechanism, some thing in nature that popped you. Well if this is so, first of all how can you say that you are separate from the mechanism that did that? Transpose yourself into another dimension to get this point. Look at an apple tree. It apples. Now, at what point can you say that the apple from the tree is separate from the actual tree? For us it becomes an apple if we can identify it as an apple, right? But this is a distinction we make, something conceptual. Nothing else. Pure fiction. Now, the same thing applies to yourself. You cannot separate yourself from the thing that you grew out of. In that way everything that there is, is necessarily inter-connected by design. If that is the case - which is so - you didn't started at one point. We could say you "the absolute infinity" transform yourself quite regularly to new forms and patterns, but they are all the same thing - just looking different. So, you and everybody else, are fundamentally that - now being a certain pattern of this universe for some time. Do you get that? If you really do, that is extraordinary to begin with. So in that respect, you can never die. Because you can't stop. Because stopping implies starting, and there was no start to begin with. So later - won't you - transform into a new perspective who sees the world through its eyes. This is - in my current state of seeing it - the worst case scenario that can happen to you. You always transform to new beings and perspectives and live forever and ever. And the thing we call death is just the necessary counterpart that needs to exist so that you can say and be sure that you are really here, right now. It's a cycle like everything else in existence. I think this cycle thing really is a give-away in the afterlife discussion. Look at the planets cycling, look at nature, your own psychology, everything works in cycles. Now, I said the thing I just described is the worst case scenario because it means that you'll loose everything of your individuality that you embody right now. My guess however is, that nature is even more crazy then that. Now, this is just an intuition I have: If you drop your Newtonian world view and realize that the only thing you can know that there is - is your perspective and by that yourself, you'll quickly realize some amazing things. How can it be that nature is so stunningly beautiful? Look a stunning nature documentary and see for yourself. How can it be that nature is so dramatic? Look at our wars we fight, about the animal world and what they do. How is it that nature is so diverse and always getting more complex? See how a few billions years ago everything was dust and now we created super-human computers who are better at chess and Go then the ones who invented it - us. If you really meditate on that, you'll quickly be astonished by all these things. And so, I have the intuition that there might be a bigger game around "you the individual, the personal consciousness, the perspective, you currently have" and it wouldn't surprise me if there is an endless chain of levels and dimensions and what not that you go through. It really wouldn't. But this is all just speculation, a lot of DMT and some MeO trips and me thinking about it. The fact here is, you never started and you'll never stop. And by that you're infinite by design and have not to worry about anything in the future. Relax, and have a bowl on that. Cheers, Az

This is completely normal. As you go on with the practice you'll encounter times in which you cannot concentrate more then 5 seconds on your breath. But always remember: If you take an stimulation-addicted being and sit it in an empty room, it'll take years of decades to fully come off the addiction and be in total bliss. It's all just the process.

Big enlightenment - a realization that your head is always in you and nowhere else.

You'll have to stop your right/wrong-paradigm with meditation and this technique in particular. Throughout the practice you'll have phases in which your mind will go bunkers - meaning you have a lot of more thoughts then in your typical day - also your body will hurt sometimes or move by itself or you automatically begin to do other meditation techniques. I've literally experienced every state of mind I know with this technique, from the deepest boredom to sexual arousal to enlightenment experiences. When I teach it to people I tend to just say: Sit down for x amount of time. The rest will come by itself. And it does.

What if during a 5-MeO-DMT trip you would become the infinite potential of reality itself? Would VR even be remotely comparable to it? I don't think so.

Hey man thanks, thats nice. Yeah, I'm actually planning to visit Vancouver in the next summer for two weeks to see whether it's worth moving there after my studies (that's my plan right now). So I'll let you know!