luqqzr
Member-
Content count
46 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Everything posted by luqqzr
-
@Zak Yeah it's true, I've got many male friends but I'm like tired of hanging out with male people, I just feel that I'm missing too much female input in my life, if you know what I mean.
-
See the title, thanks.
-
Heyo, I've got too little motivation to motivate myself for different stuff in life, for example with continuing the life purpose course. About half a year ago I was able to get pretty far with the course but then some kind of ego backlash happened, I was too perfectionistic because the topics got "too deep" for me and suddenly I stopped continuing the course. This is probably common issue but I'd like know how can get this motivation problem solved. As I've seen in my life so far, I can be at my best when I have time pressure. It's crazy what I can achieve in the last few let's say "minutes". About two weeks ago I began with the course again because I'm very unhappy with the work I'm doing, mainly because our department is out of work and I was told that it won't be any better in the near future. Furthermore I'm not getting paid enough in my opinion. I could do similar work at another company with more money but the work itself does not fulfill me anymore. I know that at the beginning of march there is a registration deadline for a school I might go to for a year or two. This means that a few weeks before the deadline I'll work through the life purpose course really hard because I "need" to know until then what I'll do the next few years, just because of time pressure. It's stupid and I'm asking myself why I can't be motivated without time pressure.
-
My goals are eating more healthy to have more energy in life and furthermore gaining more weight through muscles, so I'm trying to eat as many proteins as I can. I go to the gym about three times a week and I've been going for 1.5 years now. I am 21 years old, 6 ft tall and weigh 176 pounds. I think my goal is to gain like 15 more pounds. After eating salads with vegetables only, I feel that great energy, that's why I'm eating those more often now. They do not contain proteins but I know salads are still very important for me. I like eating nuts without salt, drinking my protein shake, eating pizzas and yeah... I'm trying to stop eating (or drinking) addictive and useless sugars like in milk chocolate or coca cola. The same for salts, for example in doritos. I like to eat/drink more sugar from fruits as they tend to give me more energy too and surely are a great replacement for sweets. If I drink something sweet, it's a smoothie, besides that I'm drinking much water. But now I'm asking you guys, what do you eat/drink that does wonders to you? What can you recommend?
-
Hey, I have a question on these two videos. In the first video at stage one Leo says that you need to watch where the thoughts are going but not take them seriously. In the second video at do nothing he says to let all the thoughts and feelings be (like all the absolutely crazy thoughts) without taking control over them. What I understand on both stage one and do nothing: I should not take the thoughts seriously. My question: Am I understanding something wrong or don't these two videos contain conscious thinking? Like thinking about a business and going deeper and deeper. Is this conscious thinking a different kind of meditation that's not explained in his videos or does he have a video about this? The only difference I see between stage one and do nothing is that at do nothing you are furthermore controlling your body, is that right?
-
luqqzr replied to luqqzr's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
So using the mind to think of something useful in life is not content of any kind of meditation? Or has that something to do with self inquiry? -
Let's use a vegetarian frozen pizza with vegetables as an example because I think it tends to be more healthy than for example a salami pizza. I'm trying to eat more healthy but I really love pizza. I don't know how unhealthy it really is, that's why it's hard for me to decide how often I can eat it. So I'm asking myself these questions: Are frozen pizzas much worse than pizzas from restaurants? Is it maybe okay to eat frozen pizzas with vegetables? If it's unhealthy then what exactly, can it be compared to something else unhealthy? How often can I eat frozen pizzas without them draining energy from me, being unhealthy for me? Not at all, sometimes, or doesn't it matter?
-
Sounds great, thank you guys! I'm relieved to hear that I am not doing too bad. Every week I'm eating like 1-2 pizzas and I have to say it drains a little energy from me but not as much that it would be a big issue. The rest of my nutrition is really good, it compensates the pizzas I would say ?.
-
@OctagonOctopus I thought about letting him cry too, but I'm concerned about him feeling that he's not given the right amount of love needed in these situations. Just a few hours before, this happened again. My mother (his grandma) turned on the TV and I told her to turn it off to not let him run away from these emotions. Then he started crying again for his mother. I think we handled the situation better this time. We did some other stuff where most of the time he was still crying, we went out to get some fresh air, then played a bit with his toys, painted, etc. He usually stops crying when watching TV and now he didn't.
-
Hey, I see that my two year old nephew always desperately cries after his mother when she's not near him. It goes on like forever and never stops until he gets distracted with for example watching YouTube videos for kids. Often his mother brings him to my grandmother, because sometimes she has to go to work, go to the gym or other stuff. Everytime he starts crying she just starts the TV and the problem is "gone" until his mother arrives at him again. In my opinion this seems like a distraction of those emotional feelings when the mother is gone. What I'm asking myself is: Am I thinking too much about this? Is it okay to just let him watch the videos? Is he too small to talk to about this? I've tried it but he won't listen at all. He's just crying for hours saying "maaama, maaama ?".
-
Hey, most of the time in my life I spend looking for how to attract women. The physical attraction is my biggest issue, everytime I see a woman, mostly if I see their booty, I'm like hypnotized. But really more than other people. I'm addicted to that. After seeing that I'm always sad because I can't have sex with them right now. I am lucky that I live in a small town and that there's not too much see. In the last few weeks I spent more time in larger cities and it hurt very badly inside, seeing all these beautiful women... Even if I would have sex with them, I am sure that this wouldn't fix the root of the problem. Furthermore what I feel I'm missing is the feeling of being loved by a woman. I don't think self love can replace this feeling. All my life I was chasing women, I was even depressed because I couldn't do it. In therapy I stepped my communication skills up and even got into a relationship. Even though it being very toxic, I eventually got to see what real love felt like and I've never been more happy. It was hard for me to let go until after like the 10th breakup it hurt so freaking bad that I had to break up with her. I was able to let go intrinsically, had no inner resistance anymore and it felt liberating. Now I don't know what to do. I can't look away if I see a nice booty, why should I, isn't it natural? But at the same time I'm doing it TOO MUCH. The most important point is to do the inner work, I know. It won't change if I only change the outer world. I was able to have sex with a random girl and it just means nothing to me if no feelings and no deep connection is involved. But how do I do the inner work properly?! I already asked myself these questions a few times, but I only found out that I am lacking love (only from women, I don't know why exactly). Why I'm so EXTREMELY addicted to sexy bodies of women, I don't know either.
-
Hey guys, usually I get new projects to work on from my team leader. But sometimes I have days where I literally have nothing to do. I know that the ego says it's not okay to do nothing, I have to be more productive etc. Is it bad to not do anything or do I have to find something else to do at these times? I suck at creativity on some parts of life and finding something to do at work is one of it. I really am not able to find myself "a new project" or something to work on. That's why I have an inner conflict going. Most of the time I just scroll through Spotify to find new songs, I love listening to music. Last year I listened to music for over 55000 minutes. I don't really feel too bad when doing this, it's more of a problem for me when my team leader is in the office, he sits right behind me and I don't want him to see that I'm doing nothing. Sometimes I asked him what I could do, then he told me some stuff and I've had a look at that but in the end it didn't matter, we've never talked about it again. So to summarize it a little bit: I don't know what to do when there's nothing to do, I feel bad when doing nothing, I don't want to be seen while doing nothing.
-
@Leo Gura Yes I should try to meditate more for sure, I've been pretty successful at being present in these situations. Meditations are getting better as well, I've only meditated a few times in my life and I'm just starting with a routine now to meditate every day. I still have to watch some more meditation technique videos because I only know two techniques for now. But most importantly is the LP course I know, I was able to watch it frequently, made it to video nr. 50 and then I stopped about a month ago. I think that in this case I am identified with the ego again, it was scared of me going deeper, getting more insights about me. Now I'm scared to start again, but I believe that I should start the values assessment from the beginning (video nr. 41) or what do you think?
-
@How to be wise Yeah true, I always feel anxious at these times and try to look like I'm working on something even if I'm not. This has to be because we're scared of getting fired, losing the job, not getting money, not being able to eat anymore etc. But this is just stupid, I know that this company would never fire me and even if they would, I knew that every other company would welcome me. I always try to be liked by other people, especially from my bosses. I don't care too much about my colleagues, but when my boss is in the room I feel very uncomfortable and that's only on me, he is not a bad person at all.
-
@Commodent I'm working as an application engineer for an automotive supplier, basically we build checking stations and we are responsible for cameras, lights, the PC and software on the stations. So the software we have is already developed and we can just use it as it is, on some projects some extra stuff has to be added specifically and that's the only time we have to program something, or when something is broken on stations that are already used in production (it's in C# btw). Basically I'm doing 50/50 mechanical stuff and stuff with the PC aka software. So if we have projects to work on, I really have much to do. But when there's no project to work on I have a digital C# book open on one monitor, because I could improve my C# programming skills. It's just that I can't find too much pleasure in programming, that's why I don't even read one page of that book on the whole day ?. I like that my job doesn't involve too much programming, and when it does, it's fortunately really easy stuff.
-
Thank you all for your answers. I know that I still want to get more experience with women, I just didn't have enough until now because I've had too much anxiety in the past and still have it a little bit but not in a degree that it will hold me back anymore. I just finished watching Leo's "overcoming addictions" video and I'm pretty sure that I'm addicted to women. I think by doing the techniques explained in the video I can overcome this issue and all the other addictions that I have. Sure I still want to be attracted to women but not as extremely anymore. In all my teenage years through puberty I was heavily addicted to skin picking (on my face). With being present, conscious and most importantly mindful, I was able to see how my hand was going to my face unconsciously. That was my breaking point. After that I was hearing this voice in my head saying "Just pick this one hair, it doesn't matter, after that I can stop". From there on it was important to stay conscious, watch the hand go up and put it back down, watch the thoughts, seeing these coming from the ego and let the thoughts go. And most importantly I had to feel this feeling, this heavy energy flowing through my body while resisting the skin picking. This was the feeling of the ego being hurt, sometimes it was such a hard feeling that even tears came up. Strength and will was needed there. So yeah I'm going to try this stuff for all my addictions and see how it goes
-
Haha I just watched the "how to overcome addiction" video and saw this comment, it was pretty funny to see cause it's related to this "issue" now ? Yeah probably I should play it by ear and stop caring too much about it. In the end it doesn't matter at all (at least for me, it's a big company that I'm working for). I can ask the team leader first, if he has nothing to give me then just let it be, maybe I'll find something, maybe not, both is okay for me. I'm only thinking about this situation: If my team leader can't give me anything to do and I don't know what to do as well -> I chill on the internet -> He says it's not okay, I should be able to find something productive to do by myself. I just can't, I don't know...
-
@JohnnyBravo Thank you, good to know. Now I know how to act when I'm for example at a club dancing and that it's good to feel this sexual energy. I'm just thinking that all these hypnotising booties are distracting me from really living. But I know women are a part of life... What about being on the streets? Let the sexual energy flow through me and then?Should I try to talk to every woman I find attractive? Let's say that I am going with a friend, we have a destination, for example going to nature. Should we stop every time when I see a hot woman so I can talk to her? We would never arrive at our destination and my friend would just always have to wait for me. What about being at home? Letting the sexual energy flow, and then? Masturbate? Use dating apps? Do nothing and just sit there with that energy? You may say that I could go out to approach women, but the city I live in is too small for that. Do I have to drive half an hour or an hour to approach women every time I get horny? Maybe the best solution would be focusing on finding a girlfriend again to satisfy my high sexual drive? I would've just hoped that with self discipline or meditation I'd be able to stop this neediness but it's probably my mind's way to escape the fear of picking up women.
-
Hey people, I've got a problem at texting with women. For example I am using Tinder, getting matches is no problem for me at all, I am 100% sure that for many attractive women I seem pretty handsome, I go to the gym, have a great sense of style, have a nice car, listen to great music, have an interesting bio and so on... (just talking about the stuff that gets you matches on tinder) So I have a lot of women to message, it's just that all those things are useless if I can't communicate to women via chat. Right now I gave up writing to them because I know something I'm doing is wrong. In real life it's no issue for me, I do not have problems to talk, I'm okay at interacting with women. Sure some things could be better but for the "real life problems", the difference here is: I know where to start and it's fear that is holding me back, but I'm getting better and I know what I may do better. So, I don't know what I should write to women to get them want to meet me. Mostly, they don't even answer my "opener", if they do, then they stop answering me after one or two messages. I hate texting and the best option for me would be just to write a few messages back and forth and then meet already, but it doesn't work for me like this. It worked once, but with a person that grew up in the same small town as me so we could talk about stuff that's happening locally so it was pretty easy. After meeting her twice I knew that I was only interested in having sex with her but I was scared at making the first step to touch or kiss her, as I said I think the problem is fear and probably because I don't know where and how to begin, maybe you guys can help me with this issue as well... this is probably the biggest issue in life for me right now. I am aware of my messages being pretty boring, I think women want "creative messages", attractive women get written to probably from hundred people a week so my "hey, how are you?:)" won't stand out too much. Creativity is awful on my side (probably because I grew up getting everything that I wanted from my parents), so yeah maybe you can help me here. By the way I am almost 21 years old, had my first kiss, sex, relationship with 19, she was the first and last woman that I had kissed/sex with. It's a long story, basically it was a toxic relationship and I grew very much out of it, it changed my life completely. I was always scared of interacting with women, we needed like five tries until the first sex was working, mainly because of too much porn and because I was so freaking scared. That's why I'm thankful, grateful and blessed to have had her patience and the whole relationship. My self esteem was boosted to the top in and after this relationship! I had issues with communicating generally, was very introverted and didn't know how to talk because I spent most of the time playing computer games alone in my room in the past and did not know how to look people in the eyes, that was my main problem for the communication. These problems I was able to overcome. My active problems are everything that I already wrote and sometimes it's still hard for me to look people in the eyes because for me it feels awkward. On men: It feels gay to look to long in their eyes (no offense against homosexual people), On non-attractive women: I don't want to hurt them by getting their hopes up, I don't want them to think that I'm flirting with them. On attractive women: I don't want to stare at them too long to seem as a creep and the bigger point is probably that I am scared. It's really not that bad, it's just pretty bad on attractive women with the fear issue. It gets easier when I start to know the person. I'm looking forward to your answers, hope these issues are written understandable and clear
-
I actually just met a girl over tinder. She was not my type at all for her looks and character, she is very negative minded and a daily drug consumer. But I still used this situation to my advantage. I was able to kiss and touch her easily so yeah... I fingered her, got three blowjobs and that was it. I did not want to have sex with her, but still it was my first one night stand really. I stayed over night because normally I love cuddling but with her it was just bad, it felt very wrong. But I am very happy that I did this because I have made the experience for myself and now I know what I want, I don't want to have meaningless one night stands. This lower consciousness pleasure does not fulfill me at all. Many people say "you are young, just have sex with many girls and live your life". I'm grateful for knowing that "living my life" is different than that, I don't need to have sex with random women. I think this was a bit egoistic but it seemed necessary for me to boost my self confidence and get to know myself better. At least I won't ghost her, I will write her what I really feel and hope it's not too sad for her. Hopefully she can solve her problems and find a guy that really loves her. I'm going to recommend her Leo's videos and Eckhart Tolle (who really helped me too), hope she's going to use my advice. At the moment I want to focus more on myself, finding my life purpose. On meeting women from now on: I'm stopping to actively search for a woman and I'll be putting my energy into myself. But if I meet someone that fits me, I am going to be open for her coming into my life. I want it to be a high consciousness connection/love, nothing else. By the way what do you think of this "egoistic" stuff that I did? For me it felt right to do this because I needed this heavily. Now I think I won't be having so many problems with women anymore and as I said it helped me getting more confident in life. Thank you guys for helping me, I couldn't have done it without you!
-
Thank you all for your replies! I think the best way to go is just say what you really desire.. it has almost worked for me now, I met a girl at a concert, talked to her a bit and asked her for her number. The next day I told her that she's looking good and I'd like to have sex with her. She actually agreed, unfortunately she started dating someone else who she has known in real life and that's why she can't have sex with me now. Furthermore she's going to move to another city too far away from me in about two weeks so yeah it's over with her. But I'm not too mad as I saw that this approach made it almost possible and now I know how to interact with women, at least I am going to try it more now.