flowboy

@levani If you've got some sort of messed-up belief that it's not okay for you to talk to people, then you gotta attack that belief, friend. That's got nothing to do with the news. You're just using the news to fuel that insecurity. Maybe try The Work by Byron Katie? Quite simple but powerful method.

I don't read, watch, or listen any news or twitternonsense, and so if I wanted to do pickup I'd go do it right now.

Hey keep posting results please! Would be interesting to see your review of the overall process

Awesome! Yeah, "no-fap" is awfully restrictive and calvinistic. Almost masochistic I would say. Why not freely enjoy your sexuality? Just don't ejaculate all over your dreams. Enjoying and cultivating desire (without having to resolve it) is a Tantric practice that has benefits for many facets of life.

Wrote a second article for my website today. I had other plans, but I suddenly felt inspiration to write, and had the wisdom to go with it. Every day I am putting some work, and if not some work, at least some thought into my upcoming coaching business. Today's accomplishment was putting that article online, as well as including a link to book a call into my facebook profile summary. Something I didn't dare to do last week. Also I am having another mutual practice sales call with my friend Brian later today. It seems to become a pattern that whenever I have just talked to my lover, the next day I feel extra inspired to work on it. Not all women are distractions Edit: SOMEONE BOOKED A CALL WITH ME????‍♂️?‍♂️?‍♂️????‍♂️?‍♂️?‍♂️ Double edit: THE SALE CALL WENT AWESOME??️‍♂️?‍♂️ The guy came in to "first orient himself" and thanks to my amazing sales skills I convinced him that he wants to start coaching right now, so he's super bought in!!! However, he may or may not be able to come up with the money. He's figuring that out right now. Doesn't even matter. What matters is that my sales pitch works, my message works, my whole thing is resonating because I know my market, because I AM my market. And whether this particular client works out or not, I now KNOW that I can sell this and help many people, and make money in the process. This calls for celebration.

There's also fantastic high-performance coaches who never played professional basketball / run a fortune 500 company. Judge them by the results their clients get. There's also excellent players whose pickup advice limits itself to: "Just get loose and be yourself, bro" Being able to do something ≠ being able to teach it to people

@machinegun That's so cool. Congratulations! I also know how transformative inner child work can be? My take? Nothing's wrong! Just give yourself some time to get off the anxiety drug, and sensitize yourself to the subtle voice of your intuition. It's okay to be okay. It's okay to want nothing to change. Why wouldn't it be? Chances are, if you don't get too lost in Netflix or weed habits, after awhile you will naturally feel inspiration. We are humans after all ?

@Recress I appreciate it brother

Did 40 pull-ups today. Did 40 pull-ups yesterday. I can really feel my back muscles being rebuilt, and I like it. One day I'll do those 40 in a row. Then a hundred. Also the gymnastic rings were a good purchase. Looking forward to using those again. I've been running at least 4 times a week recently. Maybe more. The more I do, the more I want to do. As long as I don't go too far past my limits. Going a little past my limit every day is really the key to staying motivated and also getting better. And not just the physical limit of what I can do, but the mental limit of what I am willing to do.

Found this little guy/girl waiting for me on the stairs when I came back from a walk. It immediately trusted me and crawled on my finger. I tried to let it go in the patch of grass across the street but it didn't want to let go of my finger. Guess we're taking another ladybug-rehabilitation walk today? "Come on, buddy!"

@Recress Awesome! So now you know.

This is... it makes me cringe a bit because of the over-the-top hippie quality of it, but underneath it all, I think it's amazing and I want it. I would totally live here. Not ready right now, but perhaps in a few years. I definitely will put this on my list of places to visit and see how it feels. EDIT: damn it, now youtube knows I'm a hippie. Suggesting rainbow gathering documentaries. See you in 49 mins?

Great video ? thanks for sharing

David Deida says it's natural for the masculine to want many partners. What he does about that desire, is his own responsibility. There's no right and wrong here. If you are fine with being single and enjoying it, I can recommend learning to feel the difference of where impulses come from. Is this an addictive impulse? Am I being needy, greedy, or running away? Or am I just having fun and enjoying freely? Then decide on a case by case basis whether or not to follow an impulse. Making a rule is too simplistic. That's what was tripping me up for a long time. Alternatively I can recommend falling in love, you won't see the point in doing any more pickup.

You are being lonely and experience lack, because you want to experience those things. You love this kind of suffering. You're just not aware that you do.

What is this nonsense about texting and worrying about the responses. Just be a man and call her up. Say: "I've always found you cute, but we work together. Now that we don't, we don't have that restriction. Let's have a walk / coffee / (whatever you want) If she agrees, tell her the time and place. Or she won't, and then you won't have to waste mental energy on this anymore. By calling her and making your intentions known, you are making yourself vulnerable. Making yourself vulnerable is what gets perceived as masculine and attractive. So this is the approach you could take that is most likely to win. And guaranteed to save you both time and energy regardless. It's okay to be scared to take this approach. I would be. But do it anyway. If you let fear make your decisions, she'll sense that and won't want you inside her anyway

It's certainly possible for a female to become a good dating coach for men. This is not some sort of sexist thing where we assume they can't build the same knowledge and skill. The issue is when females think they know how to get girls, just because they are one. It doesn't work that way. Just like I can't tell my friend who's a girl, what to do to find better guys. Just because I am one. I could certainly study and get better at it, though. If I worked hard. Sex doesn't make a difference here. Females also have masculine energy, and they can use it to understand and master the art of pursuit. If they so desire. And really put in the work. They'd have to be really conscious though, to not fall into the trap of thinking only from the feminine perspective. They would have to practice hitting on girls. So being bisexual helps. But I know of some who do. Judge coaches by the results their clients get, not by whether they have tits?

@somegirl Perhaps it's an idea to imagine the same situation, but with oral herpes. Those people simply have to not kiss for a month sometimes. The reason I say that is that it's very similar, but there is less stigma and shame around it, because it's not on the genitals.

So do I... I think it's curable though. That's one of the nicest things an internet person has ever said to me Not sure I deserve it. I'm not that great. For example, reading this thread made me remember that I didn't even tell everyone who I slept with. I didn't hide it, and very often it would naturally come up in conversations and I'd be upfront about it. And it was never made a big deal out of. But the thing is, people should make their own choice whether to make a big deal or not, whether to accept that risk, tiny or not. Before they sleep with me. And so what I should have been doing was declare it beforehand, put a warning label on myself. Yes, my doctor told me it's unlikely to be spread by me, and they told me whether I tell people about it is my business. But I made the choice then to go with that, and assume I'm clean, because it's much less painful than being a forever-dirty person. And so I could defer to authority in my mind, not listening to a voice that may have been there in the beginning, to not get soul herpes. I can't have this karma anymore though. I just told 7 people who I could think of that I didn't tell, or maybe didn't tell. So far, the reactions haven't been favorable. Most of whom are my good friends now. And I can't lie to my friends, so this just proves how much I deceived myself / wasn't conscious. That doesn't mean it's okay. But yeah. The people I told, didn't make a big deal, so I never felt bad or wrong. Until I read this topic. So thank you guys?? The growth, although painful, is appreciated. Update: just got another reaction: "Thanks for telling me, but I was already aware of your small contagion risk, and I thought it was worth it." And another who tests for everything, doesn't remember if I told her, and is not mad at all. ❤ Okay. So it's really not black and white. Depends on how people react to it. I'm going to be upfront and explicit from now on, and stop obsessing over this and punishing myself now.

Hello, tremendous feeling of guilt and sadness. You have overtaken and paralysed me. Thank you for being here. What are you here to teach me? That you are alone. What does that mean? You must make your decisions alone. How do I prevent hurting my lover? You can't, and you will. What do you want to tell me? That you've got a big stupid ego and you must not let it bullshit you like that. It hurts the ones around you, it hurts you, it hurts your growth. You were stuck, and I un-stuck you. Am I a bad person? Where are your smart-ass remarks now? If someone asked you that, you'd have a whole speech prepared on how there is no such thing! I'm shutting up now. Am I a bad person? Only you can know that. I'm asking you. You're a selfish person. Is there a cure? No. Deart Guilt. You've made me cry a lot today. What else can I do? .... Dear Tremendous Guilt. What is it like to be you? Squeezing. It's hard work. Ungrateful work. I have to squeeze and suffocate people until they pop. What happens when they pop? They see through their favourite kinds of bullshit. *crying break* Dear guilt. I can feel myself manipulating and being selfish with every word I write and think. Then I've done my job. Why am I so scared? Because you don't know what's going to happen. You don't know what you'll do wrong next, what your next fuckup will be, you can't decide to make no mistakes and control reality. You don't know where relationships will end and what they will survive. You're terrified of being the reason, and you have no control. Okay, Tremendous Guilt, what is the point of all this? I don't even know whether I am asking the right questions. That's because you are copying this method from your woman, in the hopes that it will impress her. I don't know what else to do with you, guilt. I have no other methods besides running away in drinking and talking. I did not say it was bad Just that you are in unknown territory, and you should humble yourself. How do I humble myself and still be useful to people? What makes you think that that's a contradiction? Women feel safe when you are confident. Are you? No. Fake confidence is not useful to anyone. Least of all yourself. If you can't be confident, be authentic. Right. Okay. I guess I'd ask you again: how do I prevent this? There's that manipulator again *deep breath* How come you weren't there before I looked on the forum? I WAS. You were? I wasn't gonna ruin your weekend for you. I waited till the right moment. You needed your perfect weekend with your lover. A teaspoon of honey helps the medicine go down. How do I stop manipulating so much? LISTEN. I've barely answered your question and you're already on the next one. By listening. If I promise to listen better, will you come back before I do something dumb again? My promises are only as good as yours. *chills* Touché. Okay, thank you, Guilt. I have seen why it was necessary to choke me today. I see now that real honesty is not something you do to get rewarded for. I've been too caught up in the "pretty" honesty. I thought I had it nailed down, but I didn't. I was still picking and choosing. There you go again. Making pretty speeches, hoping to get rewarded. So good with the words, you smooth boy. Do I even care about honesty? I don't think you want to know the answer to that. You certainly can't publish it on your blog. Do I even care about honesty? *pain in solar plexus area left side* You think you do. You care about survival and getting your needs met. After that, you are as honest as you can, assuming it won't hurt your survival. You care about the principle. But the principle is not the practice. The principle is pretty, the practice is ugly. There's been so many times, uncountable, where I have been honest and expected the opposite of a reward. That's right. I stood right there to whip you. That's true, you did. So I don't care about honesty, I'm just avoiding your whip? I am you. So what are we doing then. How do we work together? Honesty hurts your short-term survival but improves your life long-term. I'll be there to whip you when you've gotten too obsessed with the short term. You sound like that guy Alex from youtube. I whip him too. He likes it more than you. Screams harder. I'll do my best to enjoy your whippings. *pain moves to heart area* I am still scared. How do I resolve that? You are so scared because you are biased. You resolve it by realizing that whatever decision she makes, to forgive you or not, to stay with you or not, it will be the right one. Dear Guilt, if I fuck things up and make mistakes, am I still a man worthy of love? You are being such a drama queen now. Okay fine: Yes. But don't expect anyone else to think so. Good advice. Thanks. My pleasure.

I don't know. Better ask a doctor. I don't think the "you'll eventually get it" position is necessarily true, because the virus content does decrease in the body as your immune system gets it more and more under control each season. So the longer ago the original infection is, and also the healthier the person's immune system, the smaller the chance of transmission, is what I would say. But again, I didn't go to med school.

There was an unfortunate period where I didn't know I had it or what it was. I transmitted it to two people before I found out I had it. Since then, I've been careful, followed doctor's instructions and have not given it to anyone else. Doctors I've talked to don't consider that a serious risk. I agree it looks scary when you read about it. In real life: have never had someone make a big deal out of it. Reactions range from "Thanks for telling me I guess" to "Come on, just fuck me". Excuse my french. On the internet: well... No. It's painful for me, but that doesn't mean it's unreasonable. And I can relate. I'm pretty scared of HIV, so I probably wouldn't sleep with a person who has HIV, but has zero viral load due to good medication (and so super low risk of transmission). But I have met a guy I knew who had that, and met his girlfriend, and she obviously has no problems with it. Is one better than the other? I remember thinking: "How irresponsible of her.." Of course, it's not an apt comparison. HIV is actually dangerous, and not that common. Herpes is everywhere. No I think people should educate themselves on what it is, and then make a choice. If you have the choice between two equally attractive partners who you have equal chemistry with and are equally enthusiastic about, but one has herpes, I'd say choose the other one. Definitely.

Yes, obviously I have

You can also wait 3-4 years and nature will convince you Between 25 and 35, you reach a turning point where all the energy that you normally have during each day, and are taking for granted, will be suddenly gone, unless.... you do a lot of things right in the health area. Working out and eating clean becomes a requirement for functioning well, not just nice-to-have. If you start at that turning point, it's really hard to gain momentum with it, because A lot of habits to learn and unlearn all at once. Will cause serious ego backlashes that you are not prepared for. Takes discipline that you haven't built up over the past years. Let's face it. Most people give up at this point and start their journey towards the 40 year old beer-bellied couch potatoes you see all around you. How many 40 year olds do you personally know, who are energetic as you like to be, and you would like to trade lives with? And 50 year olds? A lot of self-education needs to take place, about nutrition, sleep habits, et cetera. Not just theory, but practice: the most work is not in reading about it, but figuring out how to implement it all into your life in a way that you can actually stick to it. And you'll have to do all this with rapidly declining energy levels. While also working a job. And potentially being chronically sleep-deprived because of the raising-babies thing. So, you know, it's better to have some momentum before your free trial runs out, so to speak

@Preety_India AGAIN, you must not have read my post. I actually had three or four periods of flare-ups with symptoms. Getting fed up with your tendency to make assumptions and not even read properly. Good evening.