nistake

Adyashanti - This man needs no introduction. Mike Shinoda (founding member of Linkin Park) - This guy is intelligent, creative, funny and most of all, able to express his emotions. Steve-O - Yes, I do think he can be a great role model. Obviously not the former Steve-O who was basically an insane drug addict, but the "current" Steve-O. He's been totally clean for a long time, he's become vegan, he regularly meditates, he owns a farm for animals and as far as I know, recently he's done some charity. That's how you go from totally crazy, attention-whore, irresponsible manchild to a useful, healthy member of society.

Good going!

@meow_meow I think you're making this more difficult than it needs to be. 1. You can't really use logic and you can't solve this intellectually (ego finds this really hard to accept but this is the truth) 2. Get familiar with the unknown. Not-knowing is your greatest asset in this work. 3. Try to stay present as much as possible. If you become aware of something (some sort of answer), it's not it, no matter how pleasant/scary/upsetting it is. If you happen to get enlightened, you'll know it in a visceral way and the realization won't be an intellectual answer. I know, paradoxes are everywhere, but that's how it is

Obligatory "who doesn't feel enlightened?"

A huge trap of self-inquiry when you're trying to find a intellectual answer to the question of Who/What Am I? It took me a long time to realize that I don't need to find an answer. These questions are not to be answered. They can only lead you to the source/awareness/consciousness. As soon as "you get there", drop everything and just observe and keep your relaxed attention on the "I" sense. If your attention wanders or thoughts pop up, just ask again and stay there. Rinse and repeat. Check out this channel. This guy has tons of videos about self-inquiry and explains it really well: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuyKuowJW8WqMl-sckc0tjg I also got a really useful advice from this guy, which is: "Recognize that “focusing on I” is not an outward focus. It is the lack of attention going outward. Awareness being aware that it is aware. Stay there."

Gentleman = Polite, high-spirited, likes to do things for other people and expects nothing in return BUT has boundaries, able to say no, able to speak up, able to defense himself if it's necessary, authentic and honest. People-pleaser = Also polite and high-spirited but is not able to say no, not able to speak up and basically does anything to avoid discomfort. Plus fears what others think of him and rejection therefore not authentic and honest. @Carl-Richard Pretty much this.

This guy has already made a thread about this, you can find it here: This thread is a great summary for this but If you don't want to read it, here's the bottom line: You go out and purposely do embarrassing stuff and getting rejected. The main idea is to do this until you get desensitized to rejection. Just think about for a second. If you're used to embarassment in every possible situation, then what's the limit for you? You see a hottie in the store and you want to chat her up? Easy. You see a group of guys playing football in the local park and want to ask them if you can join? Easy. Boldly ask for a raise in your workplace? Easy. And the list goes on. I'm not an expert at this, I've only done this twice, but I'll definitely do it in the near future. Here are a few points the way I do it: - You can do the easy stuff first as a warmup. Saying hello to random people, give them compliments, ask for the time, etc. - If you feel like you can handle more, you can proceed the the more embarrassing stuff. - You can combine this with pickup. Or it can be a great introductory method if you're afraid to do that. - The are no rules, you can do this however you want. Although it requires commitment and some balls. If you decide to give this a try, here are a few ideas: Ask for: High-fives, free stuff from a store, a selfie with random people, a cigarette then give them back, a 0-10 rate for you looks. You can also lie/sit down on a busy sidewalk. You can simply ask them interesting questions and initiate conversations. The only limit is your imagination. I've done a few of these and here are my favorites so far: - I saw a street musician and I asked if I could try his acoustic guitar. He agreed to it. Fun fact: I can't play the acoustic guitar and it was quite cringy - I asked a cute girl if she knew any great restaurants and pubs in the local area. I asked in English as if I were a tourist (I live in Hungary and Hungarian is my native language). She couldn't speak well but was really helpful and cute. It was funny as hell. - I asked a local ice cream store if I could have free samples. At first the girl didn't know what to do because she said I was the first person to ask for samples. Then, she just simply gave me a spoon and I could try whatever I wanted to try. She was also really awesome and we chatted for a few minutes afterwards. So, if you want to beat your social anxiety and resolve your sensitivity to rejection once and for all, give this a try. You won't regret it Here's the guy who did it for a month. Inspiring stuff:

Just finished my dopamine detox weekend (2.5 days in total). I read somewhere in here that this was actually a thing and I thought it'd be a good idea to try it because I realized I'm kinda addicted to the internet/social media/music and entertainment in general. I wasn't really strict with myself but I had a few rules: • No internet (except for work-related stuff) • No entertainment in any form • No music • No phones • Only 2 meals a day and only water (I do intermittent fasting anyway, so it wasn't anything new) • No masturbation/sex • No hanging out with friends Here are the things that I allowed myself to do: • Meditation / self-inquiry • Contemplation • Journaling • Spending time with my family • Working on my future career (had to use my PC for that) • Exercise My experience: I was a little bit worried that I was gonna suffer from withdrawal symptoms but to my surprise, it wasn't hard at all. It was only a little bit strange not to use my PC and not be on social media. That's all. After a certain period of time, I didn't even notice that I could use my PC and internet. My meditation/self-inquiry sessions was much smoother and focused. I could stay present much more during the day. I was much more patient doing chores and I didn't mind doing them. The whole weekend felt much lighter and freer than it usually does. Maybe because I tend to fill every little time I have with doing some activity. As for my future career, I was focused and productive. Made some great progress. Conclusion: It was a great experience. I'll definitely do more of this. Hell, I may even do this as a lifestyle. I strongly recommend doing this if you often find yourself wasting your time and not doing the actually important things that you really want to do (life purpose, meditation, contemplating, you name it). Also, check out Leo's video about the minimalist lifestyle if you haven't already.

@Leo Gura Well played

Meditation, self-inquiry, contemplation. Use your desire as fuel for your seeking. Be smart about it though. You can only find your true nature in the present moment. It's not in the future and it's not elsewhere either.

I'd say no. Concentration is getting your mind to focus on only one thing at a time for a certain period of time. Meditation is observing the present moment and allowing everything to arise without getting attached to anything. Although you need some concentration skills in order to be effective in meditation, so there's definitely some overlap between the two.

Because it 'allows' everything. Love, joy, suffering, pain, ego. Everything.

I strongly recommend doing a dopemine detox weekend. For 2-3 days, only fasting, meditation, journaling, exercising. You'll have a lot of time to contemplate and at the same time you'll be working on your overstimulation problem.

I prefer the simple and 'natural' way of doing it and I'm interested if I can pull this off without the use of psychedelics. I'm in this for the long run anyway. By the way, I don't have anything against psychedelics, I'm just not that interesed in them. Might try them in the future, dunno.

@Leo Gura He explains it further in this video:

One of the forum members explains it really well. Here it goes:

Consuming self-help books mindlessly won't lead anywhere. After a certain point, it can become a form of entertainment. However, if you cherry-pick the best ones and you find the principles that you most resonate with (not tryharding and or simply mimicking them), you can certainly improve different aspects of your life. So, in my opinion, it's the method of use that really counts.

This classic is not about enlightenment per se, but the lyrics have several spirituality-related elements in it.

This video is kinda similar:

One of the forum members made a thread about this a while ago.

I'd say it requires a complete lifestyle, not just a technique or method. Make a decision that you're gonna live your life as consciously as possible and act accordingly. That involves basically everything. Spiritual practises, exercise, health, relationships, work, etc. In your case, maybe try to build and improve your patience. You're not gonna change the world overnight.

Yup, that guy has a distinctive style and knows what he's talking about. This is kinda similar: Adyashanti shows some masculine compassion

@Leo Gura Yup, I forgot to mention that.