mikey1028

Love this answer, thank you!

No, I love all parts of myself. By saying I can't love one part of my self over another means I feel that I cant have preference of any one aspect of reality over another. I feel like anyway everything turns out it's all the same. It didnt use to feel that way. GFs tend to like when u give them preference over other aspects of reality. And my ego definitely doesnt mind being her "favorite" person either. I love very intensely. I love her alot. I just wonder how much more of "the world, reality, myself, & God in its infinitude I could love without the distraction or responsibility of a "romantic" relationship. Weather I was with her or not. Married or single I would love her the same. To the same degree to which I love myself, my friends, the universe and of course whoever's reading this.

Ive been dating the same girl for 7 years, i love her very much and have contemplated marriage. we met in high school. but since then I've dived deep into psychedelics, doing week long sits on my own, and realizing my self and all as God. These awakenings have have been painful and blissful. Leo, how has your path affected your romantic relationships? when everything is me ( I ) it's impossible to love any part of myself over another. this Has lead me to looking at books on polyamory & open relationships. not for more sex, but for deeper intimacy, honesty and freedom to overcome jealousy & fear. I feel that i love her unconditionally but the more awake i become the more i realize that her love is conditional. All of this is so paradoxical. sometimes I think to be most conscious I have to be alone that a marriage or a 2 ego relationship could be a distraction/maya seeing as from my point of view most spiritual teachers are single "married to God" you could say, but also i see teachers like Sadhguru who was married and It worked for him. i find myself split between feeling responsible for helping her work through her insecurities and mind to continue to build what we've been building and maybe eventually help teach others to build honest strong unconditional unbreakable bonds. or to detach from her to have even more focus on actualizing myself and go full Guru. I feel like staying with her is selfish but also i feel that leaving her would be too. not that either could be "good" or "bad"objectively. I don't now if facing my fears means committing to her and getting married, working through anything that comes our way and not fear divorce, sickness, or disagreements. Or if really facing my fears is to maybe move away from her ,my family and friends and truely become "no one"/God. Can i count on anyone but I? Do you see yourself ever marrying? does having a wife or a GF make sense on this path. or is it better to have occasional sex/dates/fun with different people. Did you go through anything like this on your path? Thank you Leo for Everything you do, have done and will continue to do. your content in my opinion is the best out there, infinitely grateful for all you do.