Dumivid

@FredFred @icequeen You’re welcome. Just remember. Don’t judge yourself and use the wisdom you accumulate. Trust me, even the most “insignificant” difference right now, after years will grow in a huge snowball of change.

@Nervtine There is no need to feel sorry for us or for yourself. Yes, this experience was the most emotionally damaging experience in my life but right now, we are free to choose how to react. The experience itself is gone, long time ago. In addition, the most simple truth are the most hard to grasp. If you will stick with self-actualization some time, you will see that before you even notice “one simple life changing advice”, you will stumble upon it like hundreds of times. Then another hundred until you use it. Then another hundred until you master it. Obviously, I am over exaggerating, but you get the idea.

Well, I have made some video games. Try this one. Have fun! I guess ?

@Nahm Yes, just yes. Be yourself the main pillar on your life. If other people are your crutches, well, good luck! When you lose the majority of them, especially in a very short window of time, you go full speed in a wall. Even if you survive, this will separate your life in before/after with a very bold line.

@ryuzaki If you wish. Here. I made this game at the "Darkest night before the dawn". This game somewhat an symbol, an end to my depression.

@Nervtine @Markus Funny. The problem we think is the most special one is actually the most common one. I had a similar story. Early 2017. Letting people down. Feeling suicidal. Feeling abandoned. Feeling very strong anger and sorrow at the same time. In the end, let go, find some seeds of peace, move one, learn the lessons. Now, the good news, you had a painfull experience and you have grown, The even better news, in the future this will become even better! Just think about this for a second. What are the chances that 3 different people, with very similar life situation, come up on same place and time? If you think you are alone in your pain, well, you are not. We are right here. And answering direct you question. Try all things you think you need to try until you surrender. That’s it, just give up. For myself I found that this was the right choice, yet I took me 13 months to realize it. In addition, another good news, now you have space for new stuff in your life! New practices (like art), new people (like us <3 or some similar minded IRL dudes), now you have room to think (or not, #NoMind, #TheBuddhaPath). Just chose carefully, do not replace one addiction (approval and love from past friends) with a new one (people pleasing to get more affection).

@icequeen I feel you dude. Well, as a person who have been on both extremes on this spectrum, this is what I learned from firsthand experience. 1) If he does not want help, you cannot HELP him by any means. 2) Right now you act as his crutch in life. You put a lot of pressure and responsibility on yourself. Do what you feel “need” to be done, but don’t go too far. Once you lose his trust, it’s game over. 3) Learn more about depression. Even tho I had one, I don’t know A/THE book or video about. What I found that works in these situations its expressing. Just listen to him. In addition, what I found, people who are deeply depressed find an escape in art. Show him some benefits of practicing any kind of art; this alone can be a life changer. 4) Be friendly and take a positive attitude. That is it, no more, no less. If you will remind him about “How doomed his life is”, he will just reinforce his belief without even considering the second part of this perspective, where he can actually change for good. This does not mean “ignoring his problems”, just focus his attention on good stuff. Idk, play together a video game, start some sort of “dream project” like rock band, small talk, anything that can “distract” him in a good way. 5) Feed him the seeds of self-actualization. Just tell him about this work, however let him alone decide when to start. It took me like 7 years to start this journey from first time I even heard about it. After all, I found only 2 paths for a better life. 1. You suffer enough and get tired of it. 2. You are open-minded and try new stuff until it work. Is hard to swallow this pill but just let him be. If you want to change the “world”, first change yourself. Do not avoid him. Do not judge him. Do not judge yourself. Do not use him as an excuse to distract from inner work. Bring light in his life by being positive. Now, an important nuance. All advices must be applied with a certain level of awareness. I don’t know the big picture of his situation, nor any other person on this forum. Even you don’t know. If he is not harming himself physically, is early to rise red flag. If he is, well, address professional help. One more “sad pill”. You are the five person you surround yourself with (if this is 100% accurate or not is another topic, but here is hidden some seed of truth). Now remember this, he will drag you down if you are not careful. You will mimic his emotions, behaviors, beliefs and so on. PLEASE, be careful. Self-Awareness alone will save you years and years of rebilding. Take care of your own health first and do not underestimate the danger of this trap.

Well, what you resist will persist, so this is not a valid strategy. If you have problems with motivation and LP just try thinks you haven’t tried before. DO NOT think about them, do not conceptualize, and do not even read about them. Just pick one and GO. A new hobby, a habit, a diet, maybe some events you never tried before, anything. Your passion in life might be hidden somewhere between them. Just take this advice seriously, don’t underappreciate the power of small change. Chose 1 NEW thing and try. Stop indulging in mental masturbation if you do it. About negative emotions. Try this: Ask yourself – why I feel sad? Because XYZ. Then ask, why XYZ is a problem? Because A. Why A is a problem, Because B. Why B is a problem. Because C. Do this loop until you have an epiphany. You might not be aware what you hide from yourself.