digitalkaine

Not going to lie, this post alone is the reason I do not personally enjoy socializing. You're literally playing the ego games leo is referring to. Like sure you got the right to say things like "Instead of trying to create new "rulesets" for human interaction, it might be worth exploring why genuine connection feels so unnatural in the first place." As if you really know whats best for someone else based on your own experience, however if you were to tell me that I would just not talk to you. Whether you are right or wrong its not worth the energy going back and forth with someone about what they think is best for you without knowing anything about you. Theres nothing inherently even wrong with trying to create new "rulesets" for human interaction things just continue to evolve the way they do. Its not going to be the end of the world if the way human interaction changes. "Real authenticity isn't about deconstructing every social interaction into some mechanical game. It's about being present and genuine with others, something that happens naturally when we're comfortable with ourselves and our connections." I would agree with this but you got to realize most of the people out there are not present and genuine with themselves. Those types of people are few and far between and its not anyones job to bring people to a present state with your authenticity. And its not your job to be authentic just to connect with other people. That shit will just happen on its own. I'm introverted as fuck but I go out of my way to socialize and to be completely honest no matter how good the experience is its usually never as good as how I feel when I'm alone. I dont really have an issue with connecting with people or expressing myself either but again people want to play ego games most of the time and honestly my ego wants to do the same and what does anyone get out of that really? It seems like you and others get off on this type of behaviour and brother I am not going to stroke you off.

You sound like you're projecting like ah mother fucker man... Its not the end of the world that some people deem socializing as shallow. I dont like socializing as most of it is shallow but I've some deep and profound experiences and connections in doing so. I think the meaningfulness is what you make of it. Some people have been deeply wounded by socializing theres not really any point in neglecting their experiences. If you think human connection is more meaningful then just live your life in that way. But acting like isolation is somehow more meaningless is kind of fucked up. Some people dont even have the ability to socialize and are still able to be fulfilled so who are you to really say not really fair to treat their perspective like its less than.

Hope everyone having a good Sunday. I had a really rough last week but I feel really good today. Everythings going to be allllll rightttt. I been getting into Smooth Jazz lately hope y'all enjoy this.

It's so lame to have this type of attidude and act like somehow you're not being pussy. It's totally acceptable to just not like the way things are on this forum and have whatever type of attitude he has, but obviously if its not welcome here I would just leave and go somewhere else. Not make a big ass scene under the guise of somehow being "Manlier" or whatever. Thats soft as hell to be honest lol. Just relieve yourself of your duties and move on to somewhere else that fits your worldview or make your own forum. To me its more weak to just waste any time or energy crashing out in any capacity. If I don't fuck with the energy in a situation I address it head on and try to find solutions or understanding, and if we cant come to an understanding then I just move on as fast as possible. I don't have the time or energy to sit and just argue with people for not seeing the world how I want it to be seen. It's not even personal either its just more about what type of space do you wan't for your life. Obviously there is other people who resonate with your ideas why just make a ass of yourself when its other places that will accept you despite your beliefs. Not saying people shouldn't feel welcomed here but the whole power aspect of this thing is kinda sending me. I'm not even saying I can't relate with bro either but I would just have more respect for myself in this situation and I'm trying to put that as lightly as possible. Feel like theres more power in just being humble and assertive.

I've been watching Actualized since 2014 before then I didnt even know what self help was. I just always had the attitude that I knew everything and I was special. In alot of ways I really was special I was like nobody else but I constructed an identity that was very contrarian so it just happened naturally mainstream stuff made me sick. I ended up working at Wells Fargo in my early twenties and I felt myself being forced to be a people pleaser type so I searched "How to not care what people think." I found Leos video which ironically has the most views to this day I believe. From there I was sent into self development and learned basically anything on Actaulized along with anything referred by Leo. I had already done alot of psychedlics, I wasn't like a psychonaut or anything but for some reason using psychs and praciting things I learned on Actualized never really crossed paths. My whole point of writing this is just because I've been going back through alot of the old videos here and there and then also comparing them with other videos and content I've seen online and to me it's just the best. It didn't make me richer or healthier or happier by any means really to be honest as much as I wanted it to it just never did, and I'm not blaming the content I think the root of all my issues stemming around any conceptual problems are mostly due to my beliefs. Ironically the things that made me see the most results were LOA shit. I manifested a high paying job by believing that I am all realities including ones where I am no longer poor. I manifested a different living situation by believing I was somewhere else. My life has gotten dramatically better within the past year externally. My main issue now is I'm lonely and always desepreately looking for women to connect with and be with or try to have sex with which sucks because prior to like 2018 I've never had that problem and i've always been with alot of women but I'm sure my last relationship really fucked up the way I view dating along with maybe just the way the culture is at the moment. The most success I seen recently was by doing obnoxious amounts of LOA shit I started to see alot of girls between like feb-april but I feel like it costed me like time, money, etc. Not to mention I lost alot of followers on social media probably just by being annoying/ unhinged so in essence fucked with my business as well. It just drove me to the point where I put down the LOA shit and just went back through Leos old videos. I started to relearn about my ego and how attached I was to all this bull shit that didn't really mean anything. I started meditating more and just doing my best to stop identifying with my body and mind and just realizing how most of my issues are illusory. I'm not ignorning anything I have going on my life I still am balancing all these things but I just feel different about it. I'm not saying Actualized is perfect either but when I compare it to other stuff it just makes the most sense. Its very clear and straight to the point. It's engaging and inspiring as well as deep and impactful. It just always blows my mind that there are no other content creators in this field that are as good I guess so I am highly appreciative.

Lol

I found the thread I was refferring to maybe I painted it in a worse light then I had originally imagined. I think I kind of have a better understanding of what was being said. I owe it to this forum for me being able to dramatically make changes in my life. LOA stuff has really dramatically changed my life as well. Actualized helped me understand reality and myself and my emotions. I take it all with a grain of salt but really if I didn't reach out to this forum a year ago when I was really at my worse I dont things would have ever changed so I'm extremely greatful for this community. but I do have a better understanding of what the core is. I guess my whole issue was just seeing radical changes but also feeling the same. The whole reason I wrote this post was because last september after reaching out on this forum a member sent an LOA channel and it was talking about how we are all realities and universes. I had no money but I just continuously told myself I had money and a job I loved I imagined it until I just felt as if it was true. I genuinely felt as if I was any reality I wanted to be just because I believe we are god and to me god is just everything including anything I can imagine. So why wouldnt I be all universes and realities and whatever one I concieve and chose to be in is what I am. Even my dad was trying to project onto me the fact that I was broke. He was trying his hardest to help me but everything he said was just what he had percieved and was percieving at that moment but it didnt feel real to me. I just felt like I had a job and I was able to support myself and that was how it always was and been. Within a week of talking to this forum I applied for a graphic design position on craigslist with no type of degree and got it and I havent been poor since. I also manifested all kinds of other shit since then things are just great 90% of the time. I've been at this place since October but recently they gave me more responsibities. I want to be a good employee but naturally I'm very rebellious and also kind of messy. I made some pretty expensive mistakes and it bothered me which made me start to think that maybe thats kind of who I am. And then it made me think of that post I had read which is why I came here and wrote this.

Appreciate it. I guess I also get wrapped up in the LOA stuff. Because it feels very real to me but again I also am always skeptical. I just attribute alot of my success recently to "manifesting" spaces and just like really believing I am whatever it is I want to be no matter what. But I also dont want to be delusional and thats how it feels sometimes even though I've seen dramatic changes. Even though I see those changes I still see lingering limiting beliefs and aspects of "who I really am" that seep through. Maybe one day it wont be that way but I do struggle with it when I wish not to. I wish to just be able to believe I am whoever I want to be and move forward with that and not buying into old limiting beliefs or thought patterns that hold me back.

Okay thank you. I wasn't trying to make it into something it was not but again it just stuck with me. I'm just very skeptical I suppose but I want to make changes that would benefit me in my life. Sometimes I feel like a pulling back sensation but I believe I have the power to overcome it so hearing that helps in some sense, appreciate you.

I'm going to see if I can locate it. It was very disheartening to read to be honest but again there may be some truth to what he was saying or maybe some context I missed but I dont remember exactly I just know I read it and it wasnt in reference to grifting. At the end of the day it probably doesnt even matter so long as I believe I can change whatever I want about myself that should be all that matters.

I appreciate you not wanting to gaslight me but, he did def say that on this forum. I wish I could remember exactly where it was but It stuck with me. I even tried to search "Core of what you are." "Changes" etc. I just cant find it but I didn't look to much into it. I also remember the user being bothered by what Leo said and basically kind of saying the same thing I'm saying right now. As for what you said though I think its super valid and I appreciate your response. I do believe I can make complete changes in my being but its just nice to hear it from other people I guess esp on this forum.

Yes. Sorry for not being clear. I've made alot of changes within the past year however, I still feel as if there is truth to what Leo said about how "the core of you never changes." I do not want to believe that. I would like to think I could change the core of who I am and be whatever I want to be. I know this stuff is kind of relative, maybe there are people who change the core of who they are and others that don't. Does it benefit me to take this as truth? or would it be delusional to assume that I could change the core of my being. Mostly because again I watch alot of LOA stuff that is about just assuming whatever Identity you want and again I've made so many changes However I still feel as if there is truth to what Leo said and there is aspects of myself that will never change no matter what I do. I just dont know if it benefits me to believe that.

I can't remember where I read it, but a user was talking about him making changes in his life it was very surface level stuff but I just remember Leo responding by saying "The core of who you are never changes." Reading that really bothered me for sometime now and I'll just be as open as possible I cant determine whether or not it is true and if it benefits me to believe it at all. I was down really bad about a year ago and was constantly posting on the forum asking for life advice because I couldn't break out of the cycles I was in. I got heavily into LOA stuff Joe Dispenza manifesting shit etc. I inquired about manifesting on this forum to which Leo said "once you realize Albert Einstein is imaginary then lets talk about spirituality." which was great to hear once I started to wrap my mind around it. But this one user had told me that the way I'm talking to myself and the language I'm using is the reason why nothing was changing. My beliefs were that nothing was happening and so there for nothing was happening pretty basic stuff. The she put me onto a youtube channel called "Be Something Wonderful." ever since then my life has got drastically better. I went from having no job being poor on the verge of su*cide to finding a career making so much money, meeting so many people, moving out of my house getting my whole life in order basically and I feel like I have to attribute what continuously happens to that channel and this forum. I still struggle however with things and while I still "manifest" I cant come to grips with what Leo meant when he said the core of you never changes. Just because I felt like i've changed. But also I do feel as if there is some truth to that statement, that I dont want to believe in because I desperately want to change for the better. I cant tell if thats really true or if maybe Leo may have been projecting his own limiting beliefs which is fine but its just nice to hear other peoples opinions. I love this place and I'm in a way better place mentally but there are more strides I would like to take in my life. I believe its all already mine right now but then just reality just kind of sets in here and there every once in a while. I would like to believe I can make whatever changes I want and be whoever I want to be. This doesn't mean that I'm not content with who I am. Its cool if I am just this forever and I know that is the case but I also believe that anything is possible and change is inevitable.

I recently got sober and was at a bar with these 2 girls on saturday. They were trying to force me to drink and smoke over and over again. This one girl tried to do airplane her vape into my mouth like I was toddler lol. I honestly cant stand being at bars sober but who cares just keep drinking your water its only as weird as you make it.

Beautifuly put, almost brought a tear to my eye to be honest. Im just so skeptical it makes it hard for me to have unwaivering belief sometimes. I go out of my way to look up how things like LOA might be a scam even though I believe in it so much. Or I'll watch videos that debunk things that I learned on actualized, or just try to find some way to debunk things that ressonate with me and it really kind of feels as if my descernment has been corrupted at times. I think I do bite off more then I can chew when it comes to the attraction stuff. I do believe I am God and I know subconsciously/consciously/unconsciously I have created this reality I live in. I like the way you put things and I'm struggling to say I will get back to that unwaivering faith I have for myself but I will make it truth, thank you.