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Interesting view, but I feel like I'd get a bit depressed if I believed it as inherently true. On a basic level I think a lot of employers are just people like you and I who have an idea, some money (borrowed or saved) and they create it into the world. This leads to needing employees who they themselves need a job so they can live (everyone needs work, or how to survive in the wild). Now I'm not sure if your saying this, but I dont think its an evil plan of some sort that bosses are keeping going and not telling anyone else about (like a shadow government). This is just how bartering is taking place these days. Since people dont have goods they make themselves to trade they work for someone who produces goods and pays them. This "money" allows for people to buy and sell/barter through labor put in.

Maybe try again, but do half as much as you were trying to do before and see if that works. Allow yourself to watch some movies and learn something new. Sometimes rigid learning fails. Respect your desires and interests to, but remind yourself that you do want to make progress in the new learning direction and stick to it. If you fail on your commitment for a day or two, dont panic beat up on yourself and throw it all away, just remind yourself that change is hard (AND IT CAN BE) and just get back to where you left off sooner than later. After doing this for a period you will feel more empowered and do a little more. Then you probably will retract to your old ways, but again just remind yourself of the above, and rinse and repeat.

Who are you trying to impress? Yourself or others? Do you need to prove to yourself or others something in particular? Perhaps looking into this will yield something interesting.

Well said. And yet I do still wonder if "spiritual" practice makes you more enlightenment prone, but just not doing it with this particular desire for it. Perhaps better safe then sorry.

haha, Ive been down that road as well. Perhaps you just need to be honest with yourself at this point, and admit, you dont know who or what you are, but 'something" appears to be happening. What does that feel like to do, just admit you dont know..... What got you on this quest to answer this question to begin with? Perhaps I can help you more from there.

Sometimes a good hot bath with epsom salts can help. Its good at clearing energy. maybe listen to some relaxing music at the same time. Another good thing that has helped me is a reminder that this shall pass and its only happening now, not every minute, things will return to normal, and have faith in that, even appreciate that.

Is your brother preventing you physically from getting your life together? I get that he can be emotionally a drag or hard to be around. I also understand due to his/your hard life I imagine it would be very hard on him for you to up and leave. But do you think you can find a balance where you can achieve your best outcome and you can also be strong enough to help your brother, either through tolerance or by being a positive influence in his life and perhaps a reminder of how he can maybe better his life. Of course if he rejects this and makes him worse, you want to back off, but still achieve what you need to. Does that make sense, do you think its possible for you to do?

Welcome to the world, young 14 year old. Don't stress to much, honestly your normal and have frustrations like everyone. Maybe you just need to give yourself a little more time for you and something your less frustrated with doing such as meditating or contemplating a question for 2 hours. Its great that your interested in developing, but what are you developing towards and why? What is it about life and you that you feel you need to develop within it? Are you trying to solve a problem in the world, or a problem you think you have? Sometimes people on a "spiritual" path tie them selfs in knots and cause their own suffering thinking they are fixing something that doesn't need to be fixed, or repenting for something they believe is inherently wrong to begin with. Maybe I can help you help yourself.

@Tistepiste My answer will require you to really role play for a moment. Let in as an absolute fact for as long as you can that there is no “wrong” decision you can make. Now after doing this, is there really a problem in not knowing what decision to make? Or can you at least see the possibility? Now another date try this one. Jonnybravo did a good job of giving a perspective on this as well. Can you accept the absolute worst that may happen in a situation and the best? If not really go into why. You’ll probably find out a lot about yourself. And with this you can work at accepting these possibilities that can happen and making the choice you feel best about despite or because of your reasons.

Maybe Leo's view is not for you and this is perfectly fine and important to recognize. There are lots of other sources of nonduality and spiritual teachings out there. See if any of them connect with your heart and go about them slowly to see how your mind/body/ego react. I've had to take large chunks of time off from "spiritual" stuff and just live life (sometimes years off). Interestingly enough though, if your desire is still truely to know truth and what this all is, you'll learn lessons even when you drop the meditation stuff, reading stuff and just do "normal" things (again so long as you truely desire truth).

In my experience you cant really get rid of fear, but you can overcome it. Start with asking yourself what you want to do genuinely. Then from there go out and do those things and if fear comes up, recognize the fear by inwardly saying, this is fear, its natural and normal and even CEOs and the best actors, sports players, soldiers all have fear arise. It's not going to kill me, and I'm going to do what I want and not let this fear be the reason I dont go forward. It will get easier and easier the more you do this. The first times doing this will be challenging, but stick with it.

Congrats man. Have fun!

Good realizations man, now you can make some steps forward. Lots of kind people out there.

Neither one is ‘you’ everything exisists within the one. But this one is not singular or multiple.

If you want to vid chat and see where it goes or are open to learning, I'm available, just send me a message.

So you offer a path of knowledge of which there are many that will take a person to a place of understanding what?

Your welcome. And like I said if your up for talking just to see where it go’s im available. Either way you sound like your approaching this thing openly and honestly.

Read my post again I edited at the end. What can you prove I’m not sure what you’ve learned or know.

What are you offering? Immortality? Knowledge? Honestly you come across as a bit arrogant, boastful and a Know it all in some of the posts I’ve seen you in. Youve made mention of that here so I must not be the only one to have said this. What it ever it is you do know your audience. If your trying to be helpful and heal people or work with the spiritual community then you will be judged most likely along those values. And if you do have value to offer to these people maybe it’s inportant to change that about yourself so what you have can be heard.

Hey KMB4222, Sounds to me like your in a authentic place of "spiritual" development. Its a wonderful place, sound exactly where I was for a year in my process (if one is to give this a word). A deep sense of not knowing, yet knowing you dont know and no need to know and a peace that comes with this. Although in time you may even find you dont know if you are a "this" experiencing "this" and honestly its not even important if you do or not. Let me know if you resonate with this video. Also much like yourself, I'm open to helping others with where ever there at with my free time. If you are up for a chat/video or what not, send me a message.

This may make you pause but let it in for a moment. If it’s true that nothing means anything but what our ego gives it. Then isn’t that itself a ego statement. A view which is nihilistic perhaps. Can you drop even that view.

I was going to make a video about this subject, and still will. But I think one thing that is important in letting new stuff in is the willingness to temporarily trust and let in what another is saying as real, instead of putting it into a box in which you analyze how ever it is you analyze and then if it matches your then believed world, you let it in, if not, you discard it. This is almost like trusting with the willingness before proof is given, to see and feel what may be there, see from that view and learn. Now of course if the person is telling you to kill, rape, harm, what not, I'd advice to not just let that in and act, but if its along the lines of something like; The world is fundamentally good and is connected in mysterious and magical ways, and we can feel and see those ways if we just become a little more quiet, see synchronicity and follow are hearts. Then here I'd say let it in (even if it is wrong in some ways) and just let that temporary mask/perspective lens on for a period and see what shifts over time. I think a lot of people need lots and lots of proof in how ever they accept proof, to let anything new in, which on some level makes sense, with survival and a body thing going on here, but perhaps its not something that has to be lived by so strictly all the time.

If you are up for a mind fuck and looking to grow, ask yourself a few questions. What makes the person you think is less conscious, actually so? And is it actually so? What makes you think your more conscious then this person? IS this so? Is it ACTUALLY true to its clinging to what one thinks is what causes suffering? Or is it partially true? Or is it true at all (do you know for a fact that suffering is even in your hands to change or not).

It sounds like your tapping into something and authentic to your journey into yourself. I know its temping to want to identify and label it and see if its connected to what others call "their nothing/god/self" but I'd resist the temptation right now. In the end it doesn't matter if what you connect with as Nothing matches others, no one can tell you what that really is except for yourself. This is kinda tied to you ultimately being alone AND (perhaps later you will see) everything. In regards to your last question "Oh and, just one other thing - If I am Nothing, then who is it that feels the depression? the very PAIN of the depression? That thought has me sincerely confused. I have always thought we are incarnations, a part of source. So naturally, source is feeling a part of the pain (our souls)...but If I am nothing, I don't know how to look at things at all right now.." Don't get attached to the word and belief you are Nothing in a literal sense. Here, I think your mind/part of you is literally trying to believing itself to be it's idea of a nothing, as in a absence of something. This is a mind trap. There is no such thing as a literal nothing. Infinity/God/Self is a "something". Literal nothings do not exist, if they did, it would mean there is the absence of infinity/source/god, and this is never the case. So ultimately who is it that feels depression? You do. The very pain? You do. Does this mean you have to solve why its there, or make it go away....no. Does this depression mean something about you? No. The pain? No. Does this depression perhaps have a logical/linear reason why it arises, like because you have a belief about life or yourself or a pain from a past life, very possibly yes. Does doing some degree of inquiry and honest looking into have the potential to help it shift, change or disappear....possibly yes, but even if you do come to its reason/bottom, it still may arise in the body/mind (which is totally ok and means nothing about you, and doesn't make life a problem, minus the fact it may be some degree of unpleasant, but even this can be understood and accepted).

Its a process of "deepening" that one could say is both in and out of our hands, hard to pin down, its a goal/desire that is pure and true to your incarnation and in line with "waking up". I get the sense that you have a belief now that there is no you that could get this, but there is only YOU that gets this. You see, Not all god/self/life incarnations (if you want to call it that) are about the going from living a normal everyday human perspective life to one t hat is shedding that or waking up to what we all are underneath the appearances. Its always and has been the case that your IT. Again I sense You still have an idea that what ever you think you are is not it and you have to shed that (ego maybe you call yourself). But your IT, theres not anything thats not you. Also, Other accident prone habits that increase this happening is meditation, looking at the nature of your own and others death and the practice of gratitude and appreciation.