bejapuskas

The issue of racism should be looked at less like some sort of "situation by situation stage yellow issue that green does not get".

N-word is never OK, unless you are black or partially black. If some black person then tells you not to call them that, stop, they might have some seriously bad experiences related to it.

I don't wanna be disrespectful here to the black users who are ok with Leo saying this, I understand the context kind of too, but this is a serious problem. Just because some very offensive thing is ok with some part of the population for me does not justify that it should continue to be used. The racists people will see this as a green light to keep being mindless. Just because some women are ok with patriarchy or just because some queer people are ok with jokes targetted at them does not mean the jokes are ok. Consent is key here. Stay open-minded and do not assume something potentially very offensive is OK in public settings where you do not know the people you talk to.

Guys, especially if you are not black or partially black, stop justifying something you do not understand or have no personal connection to. I think Leo reacted maturely here and he might take that video down. If you ever see that word written somewhere, just say "N-word" out loud, do not pronounce it, or just leave the word with a pause. You do not have the pass. I believe it is ok for minorities to use slurs that are meant to offend them to call themselves these slurs, unless somebody is uncomfortable with that specifically too. Even the people who contribute a lot of value to society like Leo can sometimes make such mistakes and it is good that they can accept criticism and learn. No kind of contributions can give you a justification to use racist slurs, even if you donate billion dollars to an uncorrupt charity that saves million lives.

@Derek White I know all this, I recently read Landless People and watched some Kashmiri movies. Please stop being closed off and denying islamophobia. @Preety_India You are sometimes supposed to not be defensive when you are at the moment not being attacked.

I understand you are not anti-muslim. But spreading awareness about muslim specific issues is not about making Hindus feel supported and comfortable, it is about the muslim people's feelings and freedom of speech. When a man says not all men, they are right. But by saying that, they are showing that they do not understand the reason why a feminist thread is created. They are not there to learn about gender based violence, nor are they commenting in order to support the victim of abuse. They are there to get hurt and blame the victim for complaining.

@Derek White I am sorry maybe I am not strict enough. I tend to give people a chance to learn, maybe I should not. @Preety_India I lived in Assam, I dated an Assamese, I was in Assam during independence they also. I have lived in multiple Indian families and talked to so many friends, most Indian families are islamophobic. If one is dark skinned and also muslim, that is worse. I am not attacking you though, and I agree with Derek that your reaction is just as immature as 'not all men'. Feminists do not deny that females can sexually abuse men by talking about their struggles. Sometimes it is not about your feelings but about listening and learning. Ofc some muslims hurt some Hindus and I am not denying that in muslim majority countries, the dynamic is opposite, but this thread is about India. You are making muslims feel uncomfortable here just like men are making you uncomfortable in other threads. I will not accept further islamophobia like this. Muslims may be high in numbers in India but they are still a minority.

If you yourself are peaceful Hindu, then god bless you, I am happy you are like that. But then if you are like that, why do you take these attacks at Modi so personally? I can imagine attacks that are motivated by religion exist on both sides, but on the level of government, this can be different. If a black African kills a European white person, maybe they are doing it because they have prejudice against white skin or maybe they are very nationalistic, I dont know, but at the same time on the systemic level, it cannot be said that Africa has power over Europe as it is the other way around. In a similar way, Hindi is a colonizer language within India and Indian text books do not even include Assamese history. That is quite fucked up. You could be religiously blind and say you are accepting, but then you are ignoring islamophobia and are not acknowledging it. I understand you do not like Modi, but do not be so quick to judge the ones who accused you, as it will prevent you from being able to reflect on your biases related to being Hindu.

@Preety_India I cannot agree with you here. Of course oppression happens in every country, but that does not justify the idea that we cannot expect peace. I am not saying Hindus should be lynched and all, nor discriminated against abroad, but at this time, being a muslim in India sucks harder in general. I know how difficult it can be to grow up in a dogmatic close minded Hindi family and I do not think that any person has only an easy life, we should not build any hierarchies on this binary good and bad kind of assumption. But systemically, you might not realize how serious this islamophobia in India is, just how a white person in Europe does not realize how serious other forms of discrimination are if they are well-meaning and naive like you. I dont want any type of discrimination to be welcome on this forum and all minorities should be able to express non-violent ideas. But denying oppression of a group you are not part of is not cool.

My friend saw a muslims getting lynched in Pune and Mumbai in 2021. I don't know how peaceful that is.

@Nivsch I am sorry to hear that

@IAmReallyImportant Could you give an example of when this happens? @BlueOak Sorry if I triggered you. I did not mean abusers should be free to create discussion forums about their plans to abduct children. But systems should be available for them to become better. Prison does a bad job at this, because it is expensive and does not make one a better person most of the times. It does not matter how long you spend there. These systems may not be what you imagine them to be, it might be controlling the offenders' friend groups, curfew times, family therapy, community therapy etc... Those systemic approaches have been proven to be way more effective then one on one talk approach. What do you mean by few terrible commentators dictating law? What does speaking truth mean for you? Is it speaking what you currently think or is it being curious to undermine your own biases and speak the truth after some reflection time? Speaking truth requires open-mindedness imo.

I also never really lived through stage orange, although arguably yes, but not in the way you are describing. Then I tried doing it and got burnt kinda. Maybe it is not right for you. There is different kinds of orange and green both, think about what is your way of going around things.

To be clear, I wish pedophiles had more free speech, if they are struggling with their sexuality and looking for help, not trying to offend. If they have offended, there should also be more treatment for offenders, there is some good evidence about complex community level treatment for offenders that reduces re-offending probability. I am very radical in my views on who should get more free speech and in what ways. I do not believe in suppression. I also believe that minorities and women should have equal free speech rights (and before you all westerners from countries were women are more equal starts ranting about me mentioning women, consider that their rights are still less in every country in the world and also the world is not only the West, but also for example Afghanistan) as majorities, and that is not possible when xenophobes are respected as "people who just have different opinions." I do not support cancel culture, I belive in people having a second chance (maybe because I am white and am not really fed up with people offending me all the time globally) and should receive resources to reinforce their views on equality. I think call out culture is better than freedom of speech for xenophobes.

@BlueOak I agree that its good to know about racists that they are racists. I dont think its an excuse to not educate yourself though. I am also not a person of colour, so I dont know what racism is like. I have only experienced prejudiced. And also, just because you are not a minority does not mean people cannot say shitty things to you, I hope you realize you should avoid people who are just super mean with you for other reasons that are not systemic discrimination. Btw guys hate speech against minorities here is a bannable offense on this forum.

@Tristan12 I think it is possible to know whether you do not want something without trying it. I do not have as much life experience as some older people here, but not dating is ok. If you have no desire... I mean, it is really not something super rational to do if you dont have the needs, maybe you can see that yourself.

What exactly are you worried about? Getting a partner, maintaining relationship, sex? You could be aromantic asexual and be totally uninterested in this area and that is valid, or even experience attraction and not be interested, that is also fine. I think it is good to estabilish commitment to truth, that makes relationships easier (if you commit to truth in the beginning, if you do it later, it can be a fuckup for you). Sex is easy to learn if you can listen and ask, you do not need like years of experience to be good.

@Raze I think there should not be freedom of speech to say anything. If you start spamming on this forum and telling people you will kill them, I will ban you. I would never think I should let you do it because it is better for you to be free. I have good reasons for this, everyday, at least one new spam bot appears on this forum and you non-mods usually do not even know this happens because of how quickly they are banned. If we were not banning them this forum would be flooded with spam and trojan horse links. I also think racism and other biases should not be included in freedom of speech. Absolute freedom of speech sucks.

I disagree that they are less credible. As @puporing points out, studying views of oppressed groups can give a person radically different perspective which is really different from some mainstream white cisgender heterosexual allosexual perspective. And those minority perspectives can sometimes give you the largest amounts of wisdom and food for thought, because they strike the heart of world's issues and that is why they matter so much. A person who rarely experiences inequality of an unequal system can be very biased and therefore less credible. Even physical sciences can get fucked by nazi and other views, but I think you talked about that in one of your videos. You cannot do credible science without studying these "noncredible" things.

@Windappreciator What do you mean?

This is a limiting view for you and also others. Equalizing feminine and masculine in a world where they are considered to be totally different to an excessively large extent (even though it sometimes, only sometimes works) is what we should as a society be aiming for, because it lets us question our biases, become more open-minded and also free. What you generalize in this context as truth and freedom is often used to offend women for unfair reasons, justify their absence of right to vote or drive (women do not have driving focus, their attention sucks etc.) and advocate for other shitty perspectives. I would argue that some feminist ideologies (not all of them, there are different feminism from which some are violent) actually do value truth. What you see as feminism is also your biased view. Equalization is both good and bad, it depends on for whom. I do not think saying genders are always same is right, because it is not. Legally I think there should not be a difference, I cannot think of an example just now where it would be counterproductive to not make all genders equal, but other than that, there are people who are assigned female gender at birth but can be completely 100% male. They might still undergo some female conditioning, which others have mentioned, which is keeping them from perhaps fully expressing themselves. Internalized transphobia exists and it is powerful, I do not know whether you have ever experienced it, but it can be activated when trans people for example feel like they have to justify their rights for self expression to Ben Shapiro likes. There are also intersex, nonbinary, genderfluid and other identities that are not included in this binary limiting ideology. If you break out from this ideology, you can be more free to self express. You can try going to a pride parade to experience this and face your biases and maybe even see how they backfire at you by limiting your freedom and causing you to have internalized fear of your self. Understand me, some people are just misgendered by most others and if their views would be equalized, that would really help those individuals. (it is not just about perception and ideas, it connects to responsibilities, gender roles, expectations etc. which limit all genders including men) However, telling somebody else who is perhas struggling as a woman to express her sexual freedom and femininity can be harmful too. There are genderless people as well who do not conform to these ideologies at all and they are also valid.

The problem is, when the "right for freedom of speech" is used to justify nazi, fascist, racist, homophic, transphobic, islamophobic, casteist and other harmful views because of which people literally die. If you do not have anything nice to say that is not constructive criticism or giving somebody honest feedback, it is better to shut up. Such insensitive behaviors create atmosphere which actually decreases freedom of speech, because many people might feel excluded.

I think there is a lot of cultural stuff that gets mixed in when people examine colours, for example racism, colourism and other phenomena. Same with this, you could find both things you like and dislike of any colour you think of probably and justify some stance.

@mivafofa Thanks for sharing, that sounds really eye-opening. Did you use to tell yourself it is something not natural and given but perhaps something you can get better at, like the time management and all those other things? I feel like at one point when I was watching Leo everyday, I would always think about this 100% responsibility rule and never thought there could be any limiting conditions to anyone's life. Do you know what I mean or does that not apply to you? I am sharing some videos, one of my ex girlfriends had ADHD and we watched these together, she said it really helped. There are more on the same channel.

Would you be comfortable with sharing more details about how you discovered this? I also have Shutter Island feelings these days haha, want somebody to relate with.