bejapuskas

@Viking Recognize how procrastination feels like shit and discipline feels great. If you love yourself enough, you wouldn't let yourself do harm to yourself like this. Just realize how hopeless the ego is.

@kindayellow Everytime you relapse, try to be mindful of your feelings and energy levels - is this what you ultimately want? @John Lula @Consept @Keyhole I read somewhere that 80 % of child abuse and rape is not done by pedophiles, but then, what actually makes you a pedophile? I feel like we cannot actually say where exactly is the distinction between pedophile and non-pedophile, because you cannot really say whether it is an actual disease or just one time craving... This problem of not talking it through is probably very severe, I can see like most pedophiles never act on their desires and they live somewhere alone and just suffer... Idk man.

@Consept Thanks, I think I sometimes do that, thanks for explanation.

@Consept Ah yeah, I see what you mean. I think it's clearer now What is an OCD brain?

@Natasha Thanks Natasha, I think the hatred has become less intense, because I've basically become more feminine than most of my male friends I'll give that book a try.

@Keyhole Thanks for so many examples Teal Swan claims, that all these weird sexual fetishes and orientations are caused by feeling of incompleteness. For example pedophiles, according to her, are people, who „killed“ their inner child, so they need to compensate that with their „partner“. Necrophilia is caused by deep fear of being rejected. I think there is definitely some truth to that. @Recursoinominado @Natasha I know that I used to be very resentful towards girls in the past, I thought that I've already overcome this fear, but it is possible that I haven't on a subconscious level. How do you think I could explore that more deeply? Do you think that acceptance and love is the best way to solve these kinds of problems?

@Surfingthewave It is also more enjoyable to not be attached to someone/something It's nice that it works both ways.

I also have those. @Consept You were saying that you used to / still have sime issues with your orientation, how did you start to understand these better? A question for everyone: Is sexual orientation genetic or learnt?

@DrewNows I think some people were making fun of her, or she was just saying it, or maybe both, I don't remember it clearly. But when the teacher came and started telling the bullies/her that she is slim, she would just scoled them that she is not slim, she owned it kinda. But I don't know if it was coming from a place of suffering or acceptance. I was just trying to show a very weird case.

@DrewNows The love you see most of the time is not love, but attachment. Intelligence hijacked by hormones. When I was in nursery school, there was one girl who was actually proud of being fat and unattractive and she really wanted everyone to know that, even though the teachers kept telling her, that she is slim and pretty.

@Charlotte It is kind of toxic, because it is based around neediness I think. It developed when I was learning Japanese and all these people that I wanted to talk to either thought I am trying to rob them (tourists) or they were so polite that I didn't really get to know them that much, it was basically all small talk and bowing. I found it very limiting For example this thread is probably my most favourite, because we don't have to be ashamed of anything, no need for barriers. @Consept Do you still have that OCD? I think that most people are affraid to tell you about their true feelings, but if you get good with body language and observing what they say and then you connect the dots, you can kind of guess. You might be able to tell what their values and interests are just by talking about something, or seeing what they order in a restaurant etc... It's really interesting

@Emerald Yeah, that's exactly what I was pointing to. Even when you have a meditation high and you fall in love with everyone, it's not like you want to spend the rest of your life with everyone... @Nahm Yeh, I would say it is a misunderstanding of being the self. For most people being yourself is a defense mechanism in my opinion, people use it to justify their mistakes and to strenghten the collective ego a lot in a group of friends or family members. What do you think is the true being yourself?

@Charlotte I have the opposite thing, sometimes I want to get to know someone so quickly, that I am not polite enough.

@Viking Maybe survival is not a good example, sorry, I am kinda confused today Saying that you need to have your needs fulfilled to be able to fulfill them is contradictory, it simply is not like that. Let's say you have to have goals to survive, but if you execute them while acting unconsciously, you'll be merely surviving. If you are intelligent and present at the same time, you will have a better sense of direction actually, that you chose, and the process will be much easier and more enjoyable. But I know what kind of people you mean, you really need to discipline yourself on this path. I'm glad I could help

@Nahm Would you be able to date literally anyone though?

@Theta I guess everyone did that? Or not?

That's just so much illusion here. Every morning when you get up from bet and go to the kitchen to have a breakfast, that is your purpose of surviving and it goes on throughout the whole day, notice that, you are just lying to yourself like this. The path is the destination, the destination is here and now, there is no happiness in the future or the past, because they never exist in your direct experience. Just do whatever makes sense to you. For a beginner, it doesn't make sense to do self-inquiry, because they just cannot make sense of it, their mind is too chaotic. For me for example, it was meaningless to do shadow work a few months back, because I couldn't go deep enough to see my shadows, I couldn't allow myself to feel them.

@Tim Stretton

There are infinitely amout of things you can know, your knowing is as far away from Infinity as not knowing anything.

Do you guys think anybody's gonna die if they actually show up?

@Master of disguise Good then

@Master of disguise Does it feel good?

@Michael569 For me it works better when I keep the games installed and accept them, rather uninstall and demonize. There is something magical about loving your addiction...

@Gili Trawangan Try explaining that to Mikael...

@Sage_Elias I don't think that you are the only one feeling this, my friend, who is 27, told me, that girls my age (16) are having much more adult looking bodies these days. I also know some girls who had a crush on a guy who was like 5 years older than them and they even dated, it was ok.