Shadowraix

You can sum it down to being horny, but the term 'sexual energy' is better in the context of talking about how you feel and using your mind to utilize those feelings. I would call 'horny' as underplaying the importance of this energy.

An idea and/or concept is only as good as those who practice it. Science can definitely be as ideological and dogmatic as religion.

Saying love is just a chemical reaction seems to be a very materialist paradigm statement. The chemical reaction is just a tool for this manifestation of consciousness. Its an abstraction up for what things really are which is mind. And guess who that mind is? You. This whole mental creation is you. You created it. One of the core problems of morality is we often take on morality as if it can't be questioned. I'm still going through his rant on morality but as he stated in that morality doesn't derive from your social programming which is unconscious behavior. It derives from being conscious and acting through that. You must question morality and all values. Get to the root of your justification for every behavior.

I think the whole point in saying brains do not exist is to say that all we observe are things interacting with each other. Reality interacting with itself. These techniques and what not are tools for certain interactions that ultimately satisfy you. Which in itself is an interaction.

I know Portugal in particular decriminalized possession of drugs for personal use in small amounts. A lot of times Shamans provide drugs for such spiritual journeys in countries where it is illegal.

This was a very useful video. Essentially the problem is I haven't done enough contemplation. The self doubt I am having is normal per se. To turn my skepticism inward and trying to sort out what I can and can't trust, but that is something where I haven't reached the light at the end of the tunnel yet.

I grew up Christian then quickly transitioned into atheism and became a pretty hard skeptic slowly transitioning to that we can't know anything. I did find nonduality in the past year or so and I just had this deep "knowing" that this is the truth despite my critical approach to everything before. I had all these experiences that showed it to me. Yet I always have these questions of "How do I know I can trust this feeling, these writings and teachings?" Nonduality makes logical sense but that isn't inherently evident that it is the answer yet I feel this feeling of just wanting to accept it. If I accept it as truth then I come off as indoctrinated and ideological. Especially when trying to explain it to people. One person would say "The kyballion is about as correct as elmo being God" How do I know and trust a mind that constantly morphs data and hallucinates what I see? My mind could easily trick me into thinking I "know" the truth.

Hope you enjoy SF! I got to explore it briefly for a few days for a game dev event with some friends. Was a lot of fun. (Unfortunately I live on the east coast)

Saying it is me doesn't seem like a solid answer. "God is in the earth worm but the earth worm is far from God." I may be a part of this big mind, but to shout and say "I am God!" is a half truth. So speaking in the perspective that I am this mind. I could simply create life like humans in which they could never know the whole answer. See if I designed this body to never be able to have certainty that I designed it and to stray away from the actual truth by forcing other ideas to be logical and the actual truth to be nonsensical in the mind. So then I can see how I myself acts. Nonduality may imply duality is false, but does that mean we should resort to singularity as the answer? You might ask "What other way could it be?" and even if I answer "I don't know" that isn't actually solid proof that alternatives don't exist. If I designed myself to be deluded from the get go, isn't the actual Truth unknowable? And if this mind is a simulation of something bigger, is it possible to design it in such a way that it can't ever know it is a simulation? I haven't gone through your entire library of videos, so I didn't catch that. Much appreciated. Will watch/finish soon.

Logic and reason is an interesting thing for it seems to be an inherent function in thinking, but im skeptical on if that even holds even ground. Infinite realities means one in which current logic and reason is nonlogical. Buying into a lot of these ideas that derive from the nondual paradigm often makes me feel deluded even though they make a lot of sense.

@Nahm And whats to say this infinite and infinitely intelligent mind is not a simulation of something bigger that is then mentally creating what we experience? Whats to say a lot of nondual concepts hold some truth but aren't entirely true and its all one big path/possible outcome being simulated. The raw idea of duality vs nonduality is a matter in how the mind perceives. But what if there is an alternative answer beyond comprehension? We all rely on a few core principles to shape knowledge 1. Thought 2. Experience through mortal faculties. Both of which can be utterly false. Imagine a person utterly convinced duality makes perfect sense and is the truth. In general its about like that for mind to manifest us and project any idea it wants on its creation. Almost feels like some big cosmic joke mind can choose for us to be aware of or not, or even make us think we are aware of some false alternative. Also I am using nonduality very loosely than a very tight linguistic term. Consider it now all of the ideas of writings like the Kyballion or the more recent topics that Leo has taught. I'm talking about all the ideas that often come with nonduality paradigms. (I just often shortened it to nonduality for easy sake)

"this is the only way out of this endless hell in which consciousness keeps changing forms forever" What exactly is this endless hell you're talking about? There is no way out of consciousness and its manifestation. Reincarnation doesn't exactly conflict with the one life idea. Being born in another life is just another manifestation of consciousness. Motivation for the current corporeal form you have ultimately comes from an innate desire to make use of it. Its about living in the present and using the potential "future" to morph your present into what you want.

Describing things as a hallucination is really just a good analogy and I don't think is meant to be taken literally. I mean if all is mind where do we even define what is "real" The word real is entirely flawed from the get go. We often attribute mind to hallucination so its a good perceiving tool.

There are a lot of various ideas that come with the nonduality paradigm. You can say everything is one but that is unsatisfactory and thats where you draw conclusions of some all infinite mind, true nature of consciousness etc. A lack of something to compare it to isn't evidence that nonduality ideas is correct though. Not being able to think of an alternative doesn't inherently mean that an alternative does not exist. What if our inherent structure of logic and ideas is entirely false and illusory. What if ideas within the nondual paradigm are partially correct and partially false? How can I be certain and KNOW these things? I don't think I can. I can draw most likely conclusions. Wouldn't to see the true nature with certainty require absolute infinite knowledge?

Correct, full enlightenment would imply drawing back into the all mind and knowing what the all mind knows. This would require us to be beyond our corporeal form. We may have figured out aspect about the nature of everything, but that doesn't mean we will have access to everything the all mind does. Fitting infinite into finite doesn't work. We are basically forced to experience the various depths of the all mind though until the mind decides its time to draw us back in. This mind is our home

I'm not sure I am understanding. Why would you experience acting upon stuff if it couldn't act upon you? To question why something isn't a certain way you must have a reason on why it should be that way. The manifestation of the universe is bound by the laws and we are bound by human faculties in the experience of the human body.

"Stop asking the universe for things," Why? Asking the universe for things is a very useful tool in receiving answers. Or rather asking questions to the universe as you are essentially asking yourself.

That emptiness you experienced is a good equivalent to pure consciousness. The ego does not want to let go and turn finite into infinite. You still have to navigate this world even as an enlightened one, enlightenment just gives you a recontextualization on how to do it through not only knowledge but experience. Dissociation is scary at first, I've experienced and embraced it many times, not necessarily through meditation. Acknowledge how you feel instead of trying to interpret it as good or bad.

That is because mind is attributeless and can take on any form, including interpretation of itself.

On my DXM+LSD trip one visualization that helped me understand meditation was I saw energy in me and that energy was connected to everything, the universe. Meditation is what draws me back into myself to foster and harmonize with that energy when usually we are so focused on the outside. This is a very dualistic idea but it is a start.

The Kyballion makes great emphasis on the phrase: There is absolute truth and relative truth, beware of half truths.

God is in the earth worm but is far from being God.

One of the problems I see while yes we all do have a very vague mutual understanding of social norms in how to act and communicate there is a LOT of variation from individuals. And this often derives from personality. I love dark humor jokes and a lot of my friends and I share them. Other friends, not so much. I have friends in which insults are normal and friendly, others would get offended. Does your gf realize that while her social norm standards have some truth in what people might expect that it doesn't apply to every person? You have to really get to know a person before you truly find out what is and isn't acceptable to them which that inherently is arbitrary. Aren't you a direct example of this variation in norm standards? So why should you follow her standards and why shouldn't both of you adopt the standards of a different person? One problem with behavior is that you can act intending an expression of one thing and they interpret it another. In private 1-1 contact if your gf is still interpreting you as rude then its not only about social situations with others but she is forgetting a key component that not everybody will abide by her social standards. What she should do is be learning your behavior and intentions behind such behavior so that she can accurately interpret you. In the social standard I think there is some possible grounding in being more thoughtful in if what you could say could upset someone and potentially rephrasing it differently. People like to jump to conclusions based on voice tone and attitude and also depending on if you are challenging their ideas or not. So saying "Aw it can't be that bad!" is a direct challenge to his ideas and can make people defensive. In social situations you could see it as some kind of puzzle. Now if you get to know someone better you then you can start dropping such caution in social situations as its far less formal.

Good points. Although I did find one study regarding photoreceptor toxicity with LSD (Yeah 1 study so grain of salt) and the whole HPPD thing for some people is definitely a concern. It is a drug with one of the highest physical safety profiles though. I'd say prolonged use of psychs has resulted in mental problems for some, but tolerance levels and overall mental strain makes it harder to abuse. Prolonged disso abuse can lead to kidney damage and cloudy minds/ scary dp/dr symptoms if you don't give your body ample recovery time which isn't helped that you can do it every day and feel fantastic. (Erowid recommends 3 week break for 3rd plat doses 4 weeks for 4th etc between DXM doses) Maybe 5-MeO will be the single substance for me, but I do still see myself trying dissos like Ketamine and maybe mixing it with psychedelics to have the experience. If I can obtain 5-MeO instead of N-N DMT I will do so. I'm actually going for lsd+mdma pretty soon and hope to get something really special out of it. MDMA is basically a therapist for me, helped me uncover and deal with some deep trauma I wasn't aware of. 125ug for all out God mode? Wow! That blows my mind. I can't even fathom when I only got a taste of it on 1mg Information is much appreciated though. I find dissociatives to be the darker cousin to psychedelics in a way. Very interesting.

Hello! This is going to be a very drug oriented post. Psychedelics are highly regarded as being capable of being tools for personal development and getting introduced into nonduality. My first experience of the nondual paradigm was on 1mg of LSD. An absurdly high dose. I was basically on the floor most of the time but during my come down it was pure bliss in which it clicked like a lightbulb that everything is one. I didn't know why. I just knew. It took such a high dose I think because I've grown up as a highly logical and connected person to my perceived reality. Although I don't know if autism has any role in that as I was told that I am a high functioning autistic when I was young, No idea if I was diagnosed. I also expressed many attributed behaviors as a child to this. But I digress. I stumbled upon DXM in OTC cough medicine soon after graduating high school and the idea of a dissociative intrigued me so I began to experiment. I ended up going into 3rd and 4th plateau territory in which you can perceive landscapes in darkness, tons of shapes and images. I remember visually seeing time come to a halt and seeing what I perceived as God. If you decide to experiment yourself after seeing this post, beware that high amounts of dissociation can be scary if you don't know how to handle it. Its also very habit forming. I had a bit of a problem for a little bit, but fortunately wasn't very hard for me to correct. Always do research! To the meat of the story: this one instance I decided to combine DXM with LSD. 300mg of DXM and about an hour in I took 500ug of LSD. I was also in a call with a friend for this. and OH BOY was it a ride. Its a very hard experience to recall. The first thing that happened was my mind went to heavily focus on the electrical sounds of my computer. Almost like I was tuning into it. It was then I knew I was in for a ride. Visuals and colors were cycling on everything I saw, the colors blended like a smooth gradient, the visuals like the tracers were SO intense that I felt like I could create my own reality as if my hand was a paintbrush. I remember perceiving the universe being built up from its most fundamental form up. It was as if LSD made me hyperfocused on my perceived reality but DXM was the key I needed to take my mind out enough to really let the LSD lead my mind. I remember talking to my friend about reality once I was able to get myself together to talk and I was in awe at the sheer infinite scale of reality and I just started laughing and said "IT JUST WORKS" A full near 8 hours stuck to my bed and my mind like pushed me off a cliff straight into nonduality at hyperspeed. It was this trip that meditation made perfect sense to me and I questioned why I was even confused by it. It was realization after realization. It shattered what I had thought before and I spent a long time after it just trying to fathom the knowledge I had received. This trip was also when I was shown Leo's video "The magnitude of reality" and was introduced to Actualized. This sole trip was what caused my entire paradigm shift unexpectedly when I kept doing LSD before to try and understand what all these guys on these psychedelic forums were talking about. Now it all made sense. So this has made me question. We see so much about psychedelics for nonduality purposes, but can dissociatives be a tool for such too? Has anyone had any profound experiences due to dissociatives? Maybe I just found the drug combination that worked for me? But still it blows my mind to see just adding a low dose of DXM what it can do for me that high doses of lsd was nowhere near close to doing. (I have no experience of 5-meo but DMT will be soon )