Shadowraix

Except you are everything. I am you. You are me. You are the rock, the sky, the Earth, everything. The ego is a pesky thing that can make the self inquiry process tricky as you've pointed out.

I'm sure you are aware of such a method. Where a programmer would talk his code out to a rubber duck to find out flaws in it. I often use my girlfriend as my rubber ducky and i'll start explaining to her my new realizations and so on and often times in my explanations i'll just go on and explain some new realization or aspect that ties into it that I didn't even know until that very moment of explaining it. Simply trying to take my understanding and explain in my own words I have found to be a great help in my self inquiry process.

Try a search engine ad rating job. Thats what I do. Depending on the company you apply for $12-$15/hr Generally you work when you want. Pretty good lifestyle.

You are it. Figure it out Its all within you.

Simply because you desire to do it. Life purpose is about finding your true authentic desires. It may be an illusion but it feels very real for us. This is as real as real gets!

Keep your mind on the stars but your eyes to your feet. Yes nothing is real. Its all an illusion. But it feels real to you and you are bound by the properties of this illusion. You seem to be new to this paradigm. I suggest you contemplate on it. As far as the paranormal, anything is possible. I won't take a stance on that.

They are great tools for having profound realizations, but people jump in here and think the community is just like "yeah go drop some acid you'll be good" thats not the case at all. there's always been promotion of doing your research before doing a drug. "Materialism is a form of philosophical monism which holds that matter is the fundamental substance in nature, and that all things, including mental aspects and consciousness, are results of material interactions." Basically the assertion that reality is physical. He has criticisms of mainstream science and what not but he has never just shit on science as some useless thing.

Why would you assume that? Just because you are having this kind of experience does mean thats all you are. To say you are human requires to make a distinction that doesn't actually exist. You act based on desire. Nothing you do is wrong or right. You can wish for the world to be a certain way and certainly advocate for it but you must surrender to whatever the result is. You may succeed you may not. You can have a career and build a meaningful life if you desire to. Or you can be homeless scavenging or whatever on the streets. That works too. One of the things about this kind of work is it changes how you see the world. For example you no longer see yourself as just the human body but as everything. That alone will change how you treat the world you interact with. The end result will be total surrender but you can still do what you want. I can try to pick up the hot girl at the mall. Success or failure, I accept and move on.

Is Leo enlightened? Depends on how you define enlightenment. Is enlightenment the end result or is being enlightened simply a profound realization? All Leo is doing is sharing what he has learned on his journey. Its like someone on level 2 asking a level 10 how to get to level 3 when the max level is infinity. Only way to try and find out if it works is to apply it the advice and knowledge.

There was never a reason to begin with. One of the things you actually seem to be doing is tying a negative meaning to nihilism. Why bother doing anything? The only answer to that is because you want to. Keep your mind on the stars but your eyes to your feet. At the end of the day meaning is self created from your own desires. Realizing that I am more than my ego allows me to see everything as myself, all there is is me. And this is a influencing factor that drives my desires. God (or you/me/all) created this and its exactly why we are caught up in our own creation.

This whole forum will probably end up having a negative outcome for someone this down in the pit. It ends up as mental masturbation with no real progress. This kind of work will require swallowing many bitter pills.

@Arkandeus Suffering is self created. Its not that people are trying to invalidate his pain they are trying to get him to face his pain. When you accept yourself as some nearly static thing, you are shoving all of the problems on genetics. "Oh, guess I just got the bad card out of the gene pool" its redirecting the blame onto something else to avoid it. Many people have been through the same kind of mentality as him and have overcame it. It takes a lot of deep inner change to recognize your own bullshit. People avoid facing the pain head on when its too difficult for them to handle. You either get so sick of it you get your shit together and make a change. You ram it into your subconscious or you simply give up and suffer until death. Only Mikael can make that decision. Its obvious no amount of advice will work right now. To accept advice means to acknowledge your willingness and potential to change.

I agree. The implications of marriage are pretty serious and need to be talked about. Personally I accept the dynamic that I may love my SO for the rest of my life or I may want to move on down the road. Divorce is a costly thing in of itself. So I really don't ever plan on getting married. Don't feel a need to get law involved.

My first time taking MDMA I had this realization about love have no real restriction to a single person. I also saw these intimate agreements with labels to be these invisible strings that bind people together. People are often cautious about the forming and breaking of these strings enough for them to not really be truly open and honest about how they feel. One of the things to me that felt the most natural is to get rid of such strings. You just hang out with and enjoy people as you and said person wants. Come and go as you want. Connect to the degree you want. We always try to fit your connection to someone with labels like a 'friend' or a 'girlfriend' etc but it can be more nuanced than that. So maybe it is you seek this sort of free flow path with building connections with others? Some may call it polyamory, others may call it that + open relationship, but I find the lack of such labels allows one to be more authentic to how they are feeling/

19. 20 here in a week or so

Do you want a life in which you are constantly trying to appeal to everybody and how they think? Because the answer will be you will lose. Always. Take a path in not caring about what others think and to be secure. Leo has plenty of videos on this stuff.

If a fundamental substance exists, it is you and me and everything. I am all of it. Not just this tiny ego identity. And this substance is what is called God which is where you get "I am God" from. Siding with something doesn't mean you are attached to it. These concepts are only tools for my self improvement. Being comes before thought. Nobody will fully be able to understand the truth. But you are it. I am well aware how illusory thought it. You make a lot of assumptions. You only separate being the truth from you through thought and distinction

Weed is interesting. All the strains in my area I always end up very stimulated. Like my leg will have an involuntary spasm or quick tightening of the muscles for a second. The weed peak for me is a bit rough but the come down I feel so relaxed and everything is more entertaining. I regularly get auditory and visual hallucinations from it. I took one hit on a DXM afterglow once, and it felt comparable to my 500ug+200mg candyflip in many areas. Out of this world headspace, everything was spinning etc. Such a versatile drug.

Keep following that path. So hard you pass the inflection point of theism. You will find the answer then.

Firstly, that comment makes a huge misconception about consciousness. Consciousness in context of the human brain is often equivalent of self awareness. To say everything is consciousness is just a word given to the most fundamental building blocks of the world. See consciousness in context of the brain is a layered concept ontop of the building block, as everything is. Its both solipsism and not solipsism depending in what context you consider it. You can't know the truth, but you can be it

Contemplate about your feelings and the cycle of your feelings. Also contemplate how harmful and/or beneficial it would be to stay or leave her. What do you desire?

Complete 180 in terms of overall thinking structure. Currently working on the application to supplement it. Meditation and healthier eating etc. All the insights I have had due to a substance, I am able to retain into sobriety. At that point it becomes up to me to inquire about the insight and apply it for it to become valuable. Its like telling someone why they aren't succeeding in something as much as they want to. It may make sense but it only truly becomes valuable if you apply it. Else, you'll forget it and go back into your usual ways improving much more slowly. You don't need some sort of trip schedule. When you have it you have it. But it is possible to have multiple insights through multiple trips. Only if you tell people to take a drug without research what so ever. Promoting a drug as a tool for this kind of work doesn't inherently imply everybody should take it. or is ready for it at their current state. I won't need psychedelics when I am dead.

People won't understand you or your perspective if you just give weak statements to everything. Saying you notice ego in a video and leaving it at that doesn't get people anywhere. It leaves people wondering what point you're trying to get across only to speculate.

@Joseph Maynor Good to note that the DMT amount in Changa makes a breakthrough difficult. Difficulty being on the DMT % in the blend. Possible, but may take some practice. If you're looking to go all in then just DMT is the way to go. Changa would be a good introduction though.

I have no knowledge on what you define as ego or how you came to that conclusion. I can't actually make any considerations if what you are saying could be valuable for me. So this thread ultimately will lead to a dead end I think. A warning with no indicator of where it is or what it is.