Will

Maybe try and keep the judgements to a limit.. words like bad without some sort of context can be confusing.. I like to believe nothing is good or bad.. it just is.. possibly try and relate your experiences and discuss any observations and learnings??

Excercise 1: Do not give a fuck what other people think you should be like. live your own life.. Prolly need to learn to not care what people say in an environment that is not soo personally related to you. practice a bit before taking the new skills to your family.. Excercise 2: deconstructing what they are doing... If they start talking to you.. say out loud to them.. oh cool your like a bunch of colours and shapes and these noise are coming out of your thing that is wiggling around.. once you get used to deconstructing things real time youll see it for what it really is nothing.. same goes for your thoughts ect.. Excercise 3:Discover you and your boundaries When you read something or listen or observe anything. do not accept it fully.. this leads to belief.. and dogma... addd to what ever your observing and improve on it.. i.e."life is god" you can add to it.. "actaully I am life, there is no god".. Get used to making things your own.... this way you will discopver who you are... Excercise 4: defend you boundaries.. draw a line dont not let people come over it.. be as harsh as you like.. be clear about your boundaries and be harsh.. you will overcompensate at first but thats ok.. you later become more savvy which boundaries are benefitial for you and which are not.. Everyone can we all please add to this list please??

Most people want it.. whether they like to admit it or not.. Some can transcend it ,some can be born without the desire.. allot have some sort of emotional hangup about it... Some people need it to live healthy, some need it to live unhealthy Some people just need to have it to loosen up a bit!! But those who dont get it as much as they want prolly need it more than others seems obvious but want that are not met can quickly turn into needs..

@John challenge them in a funny way.. experiment and challenge yourself.. do things you would not normally do.. give yourself lil assignments to understand what woman love.. all woman are different soooo. some like role playing.. some like to imagine being on holidays, some like to be dominated.. some like to be treated like a princess, some like a good storyteller, some like to winge.. have fun trying all these things out and see what you learn spark is not out of your controll. its just out of your practice.. spark is something that cuts through the drizzle of everyday life.. not money or cars or position or even looks.. If you can captivate and fantasize a woman, try and hold her off you!!!

Leo is no genius .. he just applies himself.. we could all learn a thing from his commitment..

@stephan For me its a sign your not challenging yourself enough.. your probably floating a lil bit too much.. time to step up and challeng yourself more.. does not have to be much but each day you will feel your progressing and you want worry anymore because she lucky to be with a guy who is getting a lil better every day...

write, and then break it all apart.. try and de construct it as much as possible.... look for cracks in your foundations and then research the crap out it to figure out what you need to do to fix it permanently.. good thing with this type of pain is that you will have plenty of motivation .. your mind will be pouring itself out all over the place.... When you write it helps you to get it out , just try and organise it so you can break it down..

Same!! Id like more Fbuddies though. But most girls arent evolved enough for that.. Still way too many silly idea about changing men into something you want.... I would say 90% of women would settle.. ie more scared of being single than they are of being with a dude that is not quite there.. Weird.. And us men are made out to look like players or sex addicts or some shit.. guys have needs and girls have needs.. you dont have to love someone to have your needs met sheesh!!

I dunno.. I have met a few girls now that are bloody amasing, but just not the remotest interested in them sexually... its not fair on them to let them get there hopes up if your always thinking about dream girl.. I would rather just keep working for my dreams than settle and break hearts along the way..

this just makes me not want to date.. i want to have great sex not obligatory sex.. I think I just make these great people my best friend and treat all hot bad chicks like fuck buddies.. pointless wishing they where better people but also pointless imagining someone you dont find attractive as sexy...

So .. Yesterday I decided to tell my ex that I still loved her.... did not go so well hahahaha.. Back story I was getting needy because we where drifting apart. She found it easier to bring up past wrongs and I felt she was obviously doing this because She was not happy, getting what she wanted or just felt she could do better than me now.. Kinda sad coz we have a 4 year old.. So I had enough and decided to move out.. the lack of intimacy and sex was a breaking point. Part of me just wanted to threaten her (obviously did not work) another part of me wanted to give her some space to feel things without me.. (that did not work either) hahaha , ugghhh.. and yet another part of me just needed my own space to figure out wTF i was... anyway.. After going backwards and forward for a few weeks she had finally said enoughs enough and that I should go and bother someone else.. at this stage I was seeing a dating confidence coach and I was actively practising how to not be a wimpy lil bitch.. nature called and I had sex.. that very next weekend my ex and I probably had the best sex Id ever had in my life.. Next morning she went through my phone and started to accuse me of cheating. I told her I did have sex and from that point on she judged me as a cheater.. I mean seriously. I had moved out, we were not even a couple or dating and she still labelled me a cheater.. Well she found her excuse and now she loaded all her past daddy issues onto me and said.. "see all men are arsholes" Great!! What now.. So I dug deep tried to learn everything I could about how to be the best person I could.. joined this group.. what 1000's of video on personal development written god knows how many notes and who knows how many exercises.. dated. got rejected a million times.. grew and grew and grew.. fast forward to today.. Or yesterday rather.. We had been chatting via sms, she would send the occasional song that she liked and.. you know.. I took it to mean she was thinking of me.. Well.... (how wrong I was) sms here and there with an x at the end and a love smiley face there... all going swimmingly but not really getting any resistance.. I lept in.. I still want you in my life....... SLAP... Kick Punch!! Not interested.. Why would I want to be with a cheater, ive been trying to fix you for years..... (curious, not once can i ever remember a kind word or some advice) I do however remember youve got a problem, or speak to a phsyc or I cant fix you or, just flat out walk off half way through a discussion.. I never felt heard or understood or accepted, my needs and desires went mostly unmet.. Hers probably did too because she was afraid to talk about them.. hmmmm. My question is.. I feel totally comfortable in who I am and have forgiven myself for stuffing up. I gave my all to be the best I could be but I just had no good sources of info at the time.. Then why oh why did my silly ego go absolutely berserk today .. It was way more keen to tear me apart and make me feel worthless.. more so than it wanted to build me up and reassure me... Today was one of those days that the love of my life and my ego conspired to bring me down like a pathetic stack of cards.. I did my best to observe my thoughts and distance myself, but they ran rampant and where so unrelenting at causing carnage.. still I watch unable to do anything.. Thoughts suggestions..??

@charlie2dogs sounds like this guy "argue" is taking the piss.. surely you cant be this clueless?? he is evenm listing everything perfectly.. could be trolling.. @Saarah Well done!!

@Neuroticon @Cuzzo Its meant to be hard.. you have two choices learn to use it to your advantage or leave all the hotties to me!!! your choice Bro!!

@Neuroticon there about 100 different skills that you need to get good youve touched on a few.. cold approach demonstrating high value social value, comparing yourself against others state pumping reframing and theres plenty more.. Keys is that these are all just step and they all have to play well together with timing and awareness.. Cold approach is actually quite easy by itself.. Your getting bent out of shape by what you want from the cold approach.. Usually guys want a good result which is counter prodcutive.. Cold approach wont get you laid. It will teach you things and enables you to overcome fear , doing something when your mind says no learn conversation skills learn about high pressure situations.. This is why you just need to put the result out of your head and focus on the skill and learning about yourself , the skill and the other person.. demonstrating high value its not about demonstrating higher value than the girl, you both should be able to demonstrate high value.. High value is basically that you have a mindset of abundance and have knowledge, awareness and make decisions and communicate with all these things as a basis Its not about making the other feel less. actually quite the oppposite, you need to be able to pump them so they enjoy your contribution. State pumping Just do star jumps slap yourself yell loudly all that kinda stuff and your state will be pumped. State pupming is easy .. Its the doing things your afraid of or the having the social skills that hold modst people back.. reframing is all about not being told how the world is.. Its about deciding for yourself what the world is. Things dont ever control you unless you let them.. ever.. You just need to be constantly aware of this and act appropriately..

True that.. pretty rare to catch a fish without bait unless you have it tied up or in a bag.. To be fair though an interaction starts of way before the actual words come out.. done right with prior build up and entitlement you could actually do it but .. yeah..

@Canadian there's really two paths for sex and make outs.. to pressure them or push. To attract them by pulling push pull is a way of giving them a cheeky funny light comment that challenges and rewards.. Its all about how you exchange value. You dont just give yourself to anybody..Ever.. If they earn it then you give of yourself.. little bit like fishing. do it enough times and they will get hooked.. kinda like video games.. However, this can also be judged as manipulative.. Like all things it has to be done correctly in the right manner and with the right timing with plenty of calibration along the way.. In order to do it well you need to have your mindset correct and your life needs to be going in the right direction. You also need to be honest in yourself and to others.. Otherwise. Karma is going to bight you on the ass... The technique itself is not what attracts the girl it the display of the way you handle conflict and how you resolve situations and demonstrate you have an understanding about composure and self control.. All very attractive things..

@zakur0 Bold !! @Elton@Wouter We are already in business.. If you have ideas and like to add to things, develop and grow. you just have not sold or produced anything yet.. Kinda stuck in the ideas phase like most people are.. put pen to paper and make that first step. thats all everyone else does.. some business people are dumb , in fact their stupidity is what allows them to step and thats why they learn and succeed.. because they had no clue what they where doing.. @T1r1on qudos to you bro!!

@ana maria take all the negatives in your life and write them down.. all your regrets everything..!! Things that anoy you. wasted time. feelings of betrayal. all the times you felt like you had nothing left.. all of them .. all of them.. all of them.. are opportunities to learn grow and develop.. find out where you are lying to yourself.. If you have true passion, to hell with what others say.. Start your own. commit your very life to your passion.. I have feeling your bullshitting yourself.. dont feel bad... we all do.. What do you have left?? there always only two choices to hovell in a corner and cry, or to fight nail and tooth until your done!! (bit of both at times)

@Abhijeeth There is no requirement for life purpose.. sit and do nothing if you want.. this life is just a bump on the fabric of everything.. But your here so you may as well have a full life.. this existance is experiential in nature. It is also causative.. who knows what else is hiding out of our perception?? sit in a corner and worry and hovel if you like.. Or have a go?? Upto you!!

WTF?? Do what you wanna do bud.. Its your life..

@DizIzMikey @Lyn Yeah sounds like an OBE. pretty rare though.. Out of body experience. where you float up out of your body and you can shoot around space and through walls and stuff.. lucky bugger.. Ive been trying this for ages.. If you felt a buzzing, loud hum in your hearing or a weird sensation like your dissociating with your body.. check out lucid dream tricks on youtube..

@Rayko I would persoanlly like to see more real stories.. People give allot of view points and information they have learnt but not many examples of how they apply and what the results are..

@Canadian Try digging down into it.. define nervousness.. you might say something like.. I get scared to think about talking to them What is scared? ..Afraid you might say the wrong thing and look like an idiot What is so bad about looking like an idiot? .... people will judge me and label me what does it mean the wrong thing? ... When somebody says something incorrect When are things not correct? .... when the reply and the answer are different.. Correct this and refine as you see fit.. its up to you to make it yours.. But youll find that it comes down to your personal boundaries.. i.e. you have none.. you let everyone boss you around.. time to start standing up for what you believe.. Time to start finding things you believe in.. and defending them.. its your life dude!!

@Cuzzo Really appreciate the story.. Not nearly enough stories in here!! Great value!!

@future I agree with Ajax.. Learn to banter push pull Own who you are and really go hard being what you want.. If you run around trying to please or impress your already behind.. your just like every other dude kissing her butt.. Its not easy and you will overcompensate but like anything worthwhile, practice.. Cant lie to yourself either or be scared.. you have to learn to calibrate/educate on the go to...