Aaron p

@Leo Gura @Leo Gura @Leo Gura @Leo GuraGuraGuraGuraGuraGGuraGurGuraGGuraGur (Sorry about the above, won't let me delete it) Yes, I think I'm falling into the trap of trying to conceptualise spirituality. It's so hard to side step the utter bullshit that my mind keeps feeding me to trick me. Soooo hard. It's like...literally, the only useful knowledge my head can come up with, is that any knowledge my head comes up with is utter crap to be completely ignored. This has helped me

@Arkandeus I know all of this already, I want you to tell me *why* it is so. *Why* does the essence of life flow, when a higher consciousness is active? Why?

@ajasatya but why does the thorn begin to cease to exist on its own when I become aware that it is where it is?

But @Big Guru Balls man...I'm not doing my anything to try to "change, drop or alter [something] to no longer be a prisoner" I'm not mentally doing anything at all. All is happening is me becoming conscience of what a problem really is. But I'm not acting upon any human advice or practical knowledge, it just starts to melt when I experientially know what my issue is by it's very nature...and I don't know how it works...

Also the difference between "thinking" and becoming aware. Because for me, there is a lot of confusion surrounding those differences, and if I don't understand them it's harder to progress.

Nice man keep going. As we say in Northern Ireland, "keep her lit big son."

In my (often flawed) opinion, enlightenment would only cause you to know that your misery is a mental fabrication and to subsequently overcome it. Like looking down a dark hallway and being scared of a monster your thinking about. If you were to have an *experiencial* awakening to the fact that there is no monster (ie, if you switched the lights on) the only thing that awakening will do is make you realise that you made that monster, and that it never existed in the first place. To me, enlightenment will only cause a lack of misery, it will disarm depression and kill fear. Because those things have never existed in reality...ever

Love it

To say that anything is 'wrong' absolutely is a very large statement. I was born and raised a Baptist, quickly to find that it wasn't exactly the pinnacle of truth. However, as I grew and grew in my pursuit of truth I started to have encounters with something. There was no other "person" that I was aware of, no other body in the same room. But I was experiencing a presence and I knew it. Outside of church and the Bible and teachers of Christianity, this unbodied *thing* was giving me direction. And I'm not talking about a feeling in my stomach, like a gut instinct. I'm talkin' I knew shit that was gona happen in the future. Now me and this *presence* have somewhat of a relatability and I've started to become more aware of such, Experiencially. The problem lies within the human addition of the mind, addition is ideologies, beliefs, etc. I felt impressed to drop "all my beliefs" and just *experience*. You can fake beliefs, you cannot fake experience. (Honest experience). If I slap you in the face, and you experience my hand hitting you in the face, it would be hard to convince you that my hand didn't hit you. And so with religion, the problem is that (even within Christianity) there are so many additives. The true spirit is barely visible.

I realised this last week somehow on my own. For some reason i just decided to silence myself and, while i don't fully understand why, it seemed to bring about a raised self awareness. I have been pondering silence as well as expression casually the past few weeks and i have discovered that there is more than what meets the eye within these two topics. I have found myself imposing my knowledge on other people only to become immediately aware that it is in fact only insecurity and a sense of self-lack that i am doing it out of. While i dont fully understand this either, i am very intrigued. Why do i speak when i am considering something that i am insecure about? Is it to subconsciously put the burden on someone else? Is it to make myself feel like i have conquered the insecurity and that i now teach other people about it instead? strange...