nightlight

@Natasha thats a very interesting point, thank you! I've watched the whole video and I can learn a lot of it. I love this place here. It's so nurishing and here's so much understanding and love!

Hi Ayla Thank you for your answer. No, I'm not. I am sorry, I don't understand this point. What do you mean by "another"? Thank you a lot

Let me share something with you guys: I am addicted to women and I am absolutely unable to stay attracted to them any longer than 3 months. In fact, women have always been very admirable for me and you could even say they have unconsciously always been the purpose of my life. So I worked hard on myself to get better with them. And I did get better. A lot. I am a dancer know (what a surprise) and this is also how I meet many many women who are often pretty attracted to me. Sounds cool right? Well it isn't. Because the more I have the possibility to be with girls, the bigger this issue gets. Being a Playboy is not a healthy lifestyle. An addiction does defenitely not get better when you get more "addictive substance" to consume. As soon as I get together with a girl that I think is good for me and I would like to be with her, my life collapses like a house of cards. Why? Simple: I have always been working so hard on getting better with girls, because it has always been so important for me. Guess what happens with all these ideals, plans, visions, mindsets, characteristics, ..., that I have internalized as soon as I notice that I won't need them anymore, because I am actually in a situation now, in which I realize that from now on I should never ever try to get any other girl again..? Right, they just crumble into dust.. How can I describe this.. It's like your worldview you have had for your whole life suddenly has to change. Obviously not an easy thing.. Feel free to share your opinion on this. I will be happy to read your thoughts, and to answer if you have further questions.

Thank you guys! Summing up your information I think the biggest point is to be mindful on the motivation of being kind. And therefore not to be kind whenever it conflicts with my own values and goals. This is great advice. I will be more conscient on this topic from now on.

Oh wow you can get some fast and awesome replies here!! @Isle of View Well actually I think I want to be kind, not to appear kind. Because it just feels good to me to be kind and to help people. BUT I think your right and should think a bit more about your words. Maybe there is really a part of me that wants to appear kind. I will contemplate. Your answer seems pretty rich to me.

Hola amigos I am - more or less frequently - encountering the problem, that my kindness is understood as weakness by other people. The bad thing is that this happens especially with people who are close to me. Now I wanted to ask you guys for your thoughts on this. But let me make something clear before starting the discussion. I do NOT want to hear things like "you know, they are just ignorant, disfunctional people, you should actually get a lot of respect for your positive behaviour, you are doing everything well, they are bad, ..., blablabla" ==> since I encounter this problem with multiple people, it is obvious that this is a problem of mine and not of them. And even if they were guilty to some degree too, I am totally aware of the fact that I can change myself, but I cannot change them. So let's focus on the mindset and behaviour a person should have, who wants to be kind AND who wants to get his fair amount of respect too. Thank you guys for sharing your thoughts on this issue. Love, nightlight

@Mad Cat I am also totally surprised! I am living in Switzerland now but will move to Finland this summer. And as I have started this thread, obviously I am also into meeting up and making friends in a place I will be living soon And what could be better than them even being into self development?!

I would love to have to possibility to kind of have a maps or something, where we all could share our location, where we live. I am requesting this, because I would love to meet people face-to-face, who follow the same interests as I do. But somehow this doesn't seem to be so easy, because almost all people surrounding me do not care about self-actualization, and if they do, then they tend to completely lose the correspondence to reality. So I am really interested in meeting people who live close to me (it feels like almost everybody following Leo is US-American) and share the same world view. So how do we get this done? Is there a Location sharing website or something we could use, or should a new area in the forum be created? Let's find each other and grow together! Deep love, nightlight (from Switzerland/Finland)