vibv

Woulda shoulda coulda. Start by taking personal responsibility for your situation.

Sexual frustration is not sufficient, but necessary.

Of course it is. Maybe not exclusively, but you can't deny the sexual aspect.

@Bobby_2021 There are no "abusers". Everyone is an abuser. It's just a question of degree and how one acts upon it. By removing yourself so far from them you're denying your own abusive tendencies.

That makes no sense whatsoever. Firstly, if he really was your friend he wouldn't demand something in return after he helped you. That just makes it a business transaction instead of helping a friend in a time of need. You do not owe him anything, let alone 3 years of free rent — I don't get where this idea of him even comes from. I can see that he wants a "thank you" in form of a meal together or something like that but the way you put it it seems he just wants to profit from the situation by making you feel as if you're in debt to him now. You wouldn't treat a friend like that.

Life is a curse. Life is a blessing.

Exactly. It does so to bring BEING into EXPERIENCE.

You're only an incel if you think that you're entitled to it and it's society's fault One year isn't that long. I mean you had no sex for more than a decade at the beginning of your life (at least I hope so). Furthermore spirituality aims to work with that energy in other ways than to release it in a sexual way — so you could even see it as an advantage! Relax. Everything will unfold at the right time in the most perfect way.

The rhetoric around pedophiles resembles a witch-hunt.

Or you're having all experiences RIGHT NOW, but you twisted your perspective enough that it seems that all so-called others are outside of your control.

That's what I think after scrolling Reddit for too long... jeez

Yeah.. but you will never know IT. And if you think you do, you're closed up to all the other possibilities. You ARE it, but it remains an eternal mystery, because that's its very nature.

I'm done here.

@Salvijus Because we diverted so far away from the actual point - I just want to highlight this statement of yours and state once again: That view is narrowly egotistical, wholly uncompassionate and a rationale for pure devilry.

That's simply not true. Also I actually question that myself the whole time, while you seem to just divert the attention away from your behaviour. Whatever, this is leading nowhere.

I'm stating my observations, while I have no idea what's going on inside you. I can see what you say and how that affects other people, while you seem to largely ignore the latter part.

Don't you see how self-serving this view is? If the other person has a problem with what you say, it's just because they are not healed enough yet to see your truth. I don't try to heal you, nor do I believe to be in possession of the truth, or that I know better than you what's good for you. I just call you out on your bullshit that you present here as fact.

Bullshit. That makes you no different than a christian crusader that tries to proselytize other people into their truth. This is pure devilry.

Good communication takes the other's perspective into consideration.

Okay, that's nice. But that's not what everyone else perceives.

I'm making observations while you think you know someone else better than they themselves do.

No, you clearly try to "heal" someone here. That's what you literally said. I don't know you, I merely observe dynamics I've been involved in myself and I can tell you how that's received from the other side.

I don't, I'm pointing out my observations.

See the issue is, you're talking about stuff you have no idea about: What goes on inside someone else. You confuse your conjectures with reality. You're not talking to the other person, you're talking to some projection of yourself. You're not really interested in her, because you've already made up your mind about her. You're not meeting her on eye level, instead you're on some high horse and behave as if you're the one that has a solution to her problem. As if you're more advanced and the other person has to listen to what you say, else they're just running away from the truth — but it's not the truth, it's your interpretation of their behaviour. That's not helpful and instead often leads to the other closing up.

That's extremely dismissive of the emotions of the other person.