inFlow

I guess I'm stuck in logical thinking about this. Will definitely contemplate it in my next trip.

@Breakingthewall and it mindfucks my mind also just to think about it. I bring up this ever lasting moment of Now and contemplate how can it exist. Was it all there all along? If it is, it baffles my mind how.

@Gili Trawangan I understand that. Now is ever present. But how Now is forever. How did Now start?

I consumed about 200ug of LSD, my most done yet. 40minutes in after I just put it under my tongue I already started to see visuals and I knew it's gonna be a strong one. And I just said damn this is gonna be a huge one so I just laid in bed and watched it come up. Main insights: Raised Consciousness can be anywhere. I literally Saw myself laying in bed through the outside, it's hard to explain the sensation, but wow. I could imagine myself being anywhere else in the world right now. The infinite hug - I was laying and hugged my legs and it felt like I needed someone to hug me. And as I searching for myself to hug Me it felt like I was catching my own tail, but I was trying to hug me. Then I just became infinite and groundless, as some kind of spinning donut LOL. Then it was obvious No one can ever HUG the whole of ME. The realities infinite gears/nuts/bolts. As I was concentrating on a object it felt like there were some kind of gears through reality, like spinning a nut on an infinite rod of reality and that felt like I was spinning a nut through the rod of time, as if I could go to the future or the past. As it stopped then the rod shoot out in a different way that was meant by location, where I was at that moment in time and space. And yet other rods sprung out of that one and more and more and more to infinity and it started to spin and spin and I understood that those nuts are like everything I experienced through life, my beliefs, my bad habits everything. And I sort of started to rearrange those nuts, spinning them in different directions, putting the big ones else where and getting them back together. That was so bizarre but interesting. This was my biggest dose and I really was so responsible with all my setting, just laying in bed and being calm, watching what happens, no ego recoils or anything just a calm mindful trip. I was also wondering how much do other psychedelics feels different, like 5meo dmt.

@Vibroverse Become conscious that what you see in front of you has no space between you and the object. The space which you see must become sort of a 2D view. When you look at a tv screen and lets say a movie is on, it looks like there is depth in that movie (space between a character and some background stuff lets say a house) but you are literally looking at a 2D view as your TV screen, start to contemplate and look for that 2D flat view in your own consciousness, thus you can realise that there is no space. Good luck. Hope I helped.

Would love if Leo at least uploaded mp3 of his blog posts

By doing nothing you always decline/degrade. Growing consciousness on a daily basis is crucial in this work, if you can get a 0.1% improvement by meditating once a day it's still a lot. Btw you need to grow your focusing muscles which then grows into having more will power, being more aware of everything thats happening around you, after some time you notice even the full moons energy which is very powerful when you start to notice it. All in all some kind of "sadhana" is important for your over-all being.

Absolute nothingness, empty void of something which is nothing. Beautiful. Those ego death moments are something magical.

Almost every morning when I eat breakfast I listen to trance music and I can hear God, this brings tears in my eyes every time. On my rides home in my car I often just fall in God's Love which also brings tears in my eyes. I could go on and on how I'am with God all the time, but I think your point is that you want to know if you can BE very spiritual sober and the answer is - ofcourse. Just meditate, exercise, eat clean, get your system IN FLOW and you will be with God very often. This work need decades of integration to get a real tangible reward in your every day consciousness. It's not only in those deep realizations where we are with God or Infinity. As time goes by you realize that you always are with it, you just need to stop, remember that and feel into it.

Haha nice. You picked the right one. Notice how the pedant is like a shield to you from other people. I once gave a black tourmaline pedant as a gift to my ex wife and one time I noticed how I myself can actually feel the "shieldness" part of her pedant on her, that was fucking amazing to notice. It's as if you become a turtle with a shell surrounding yourself from bad energy. Also here's an idea for you. If a mineral mined from the mountain can be radioactive such as the typical "Uranium" then why can't crystals send energy also?

Hah this one is tricky. One time I was so aware and conscious that I literally saw my mind lying to itself and believing. That opened my eyes to what a beast the mind actually is. It's not even describable and it's really scary when you notice it. But that hyper aware state was over in a few minutes and then I just accepted the self-deception and continued living as usual with my self-deception. Self-deception on a self-deception on a self-deception. You lie to yourself and believe it, even when it felt so real. The realness is what is the scariest part of it.

@Vision Enlightenment can happen at every stage.

Actually when you start to learn about sexual energy thats like a new field that opens up. And Im not even talking about tantric sex which is fucking amazing and does increase consciousness.

Ejaculation is bad. You waste a lot of life-energy in your system to replace your wasted semen. Actually you waste LIFE and your body has to replace it, and it taxes your body a lot. I mean when you start to notice it its like damn. You can feel the body is sucking energy even from your bones. Actually when teenagers start to fap their grades in school drop because ejaculation hits the mind very much. There is a spiritual master "Mantak Chia" he talks a lot about this in his work. He got tons and tons of videos on youtube. Its also very crucial that you master your sex energies and raise them up with practices such as "The big pull". Try not to ejaculate for a couple of weeks you will feel so much better, try to get past the urge to cum. You will notice increased creativity, energy levels and happiness. Actually when I ejaculate the next few days I feel like im stoned, I feel less interest in doing things and after 3 days of no ejaculation I can feel im getting better, sharper, more creative, which for me, as Im quite aware about these things, is important.

I use Mind Lab Pro, kinda pricey but works great. Very subtle, very potent, relaxing, you feel good on it the whole day, and it's not stimulating. In the evening you don't feel any fatigue on your mind, you can still bite books after an intense day no problem.

Smoked some weed and was minding my own business when I just stopped for a second to just take a breath and relax and for like a few seconds I witnessed reality being sort of a hologram. It was so out of this world that the second I witnessed it the mind completely melted into the hologram and shut down, as in like my mind was going "Fuck it, it's beyond me" My brain and all my thoughts became this unitive one hologram of reality. I was so wrapped up in fear after this as I was witnessing this. The ego didn't like it as it was WAY WAY WAY beyond ordinary physical life. This insight opened up like a new dimension to understanding what is reality.

@justfortoday could you say you are past that point where these insights you had are way beyond what you even had imagined to be possible?

On point.

@Frenk That's the magic of reality. Also I don't know how it works ultimately.

@Frenk Lets say you stand in front of your tv, lets say 1 meter apart. That range between you and your tv doesn't exist (well it does in normal consciousness state, but what I came to understand that it doesn't, that's an illusion). You might see range towards things, but that doesn't exist. It's a hologram, a movie screen. When you see a movie there is no range there, it's only what is shown, that's what I saw my reality being, but way more vivid. I don't even know if what am I describing even a thing. But that happened.

@Mvrs It's very hard to describe it directly, im also not a native English speaker. It's like a satori, when you see everything in unity, but the perception changes where it becomes so weird that even physical range and depth in reality vanishes. There is just the perception of your eyes and you might see your monitor/phone somewhere "further" from you, but that's was seen as an illusion, there was no further, it was like seeing a movie in a tv, but it was my own reality. Very strange, but wow was that creepy and beautiful at the same time. I even didn't try to think what that was as I instantly recognized that my witnessed "hologram" was also creating my mind/brain (also my whole body was a part of the same hologram) in "reality" and that was beyond all thinking, I could only witness it. Super weird experience, nothing that I ever could imagine or think of, but amazingly wow.

@justfortoday It's as if reality has no depth to it physically, range is like an illusion. It's like a one dimensional monitor showing a movie of reality, it FEELS like you are moving somewhere in range, going to the fridge, you move a distance inside reality, but that's an illusion.

It will come. And it's beautiful in the same time.

@Member Yeah, weak people can't pay the price of being in fear in those moments. But awakening after awakening I've grown to understand that fear is the best indicator that the ego wants to distract me from something deep. Even though you don't fully go through but by being aware of these mechanisms at peak experiences you can learn and prepare yourself for future awakenings and not let yourself be controlled by fear so much. The main difference between hardcore people who pay everything in order to understand Truth is that they go fully into it no matter the cost. Fear? Insanity? They don't care. I mean it seems like the craziest people are the ones who have the most wisdom by letting go of fear and surrendering.

I've had dozens of awakenings. Dozens of realizations of Consciousness, self, ego, God, but this is like unreal to witness. This depth of spirituality is very frightening. And I thought that I could handle the fear and ego resistance this is next level.. It's as if reality opens up your eyes to itself, like reality being a woman and getting naked in front of you.