chakra_7654321

Hey there, long story short.... I spent most of my 20's figuring out my Life Purpose... so I bounced back and forth in different subjects. I have a lot of college credits in different topics (Accounting, Ana & Phy, Business, Computer Science) After several years, I am going with computer science.. in specific , Software/Data Engineering I enjoy computer science topics, I enjoy taking the classes at a university, i also enjoy hearing the content in a different language. Just finished up an internship in Data Engineering, and would love to learn more about the topic The major problem...... To get my engineering degree (and to get a full time job, where I can take the income and invest it in my heart's purpose) I have to take BIO part 2, Chem 1, and Physics 1. None of which has anything to do with the field I want to go in, I am 100% done with the Computer Science curriculum... I have a lot of resistance taking this, it's causing a lot of anxiety, frustration, and a lot of negative emotions (which can lead to negative manifestations) These subjects have nothing to do with my degree and my concentration, so how can i go about this? I would love to take this time, instead of learning BIO,CHM, PHY to learning more about the technologies my part time uses to get a job that starts off at 97k Yeah.. this is Orange Spiral Dynamics thinking... Any advice? Instead of learning the material, I am more interested in learning about the cheating algorithms, than the actual contents of these subject that do not apply for my degree It's like a Basketball player doing Cricket drills to get better at Basketball which makes zero sense Thanks, drinking a little to reject the reality I am presented with right now PS. No offense to anyone that needs to take BIO, CHEM or PHYS to actualize their life's purpose.

Hey there hope you're having a great day. Just want to get this out of the way. I am 27 studying Comp Sci at a university, i have a solid gym routine, eat healthy, meditate, understand purpose. I would like to burn through this material pursuit asap. I don't have a problem with the initial attraction, I am confident in my looks (i am 6'3, brown skin, long curly hair, and have been told in the past that I am "anatomically gifted" in reference to my dick. I've meditated so much that I have the control to not bust and last as long as I can (girls have told me their mouths are to tired lol) Anyways, more serious.... I am really struggling with not being in my head. I am so far in my head, that I have crippling anxiety to the point of breaking down because I struggle so much with the conversation topics. It's not so much I am in fear of rejection (I'd say it's 20%), but the other 80% is the fear that I will make a mistake. I struggle so much with letting go of previous mistakes and going forward. Here's the overview, if I am not logical and "being myself" I end up saying some weird shit that turns people off in general. If I try to stay in "a masculine frame" then it just becomes way to logical. Sure, the solution maybe just to talk to more, but I am really struggling with this, I don't know how to convey this over message. Reading over this, it seems like a pointless forum. As a matter of fact, I made a post with this same topic. I read over the solution everyone gave but I am still back in square one. I would like to approach more females, but people wear masks everywhere and it's hard to gauge if they want to be approached or not. I also have this worry that if i am at the gym, and get rejected, that other females at the gym will see and I just can't approach them either. I have so many thoughts in my head: "Will this come across as creepy?" , "Is this too friendly?" , "Does she want to be approached?". Even with "High Interest Girls" where they are "choosing me", I just dont know how to go about things. I have destroyed the interest of High Interest Girls way to many times to have any confidence in my verbal game. How do you engage a Females Emotions? How the hell do you text them? I just for the life of me cannot figure out. How do you sexualize the conversation without being a creep? I done some soul searching, and in my childhood/teen/early 20's is that I am able to make friends initially (i can make friends ranging from Deep Republicans, to Deep Democrats) but eventually down the line I end up saying some bizarre shit. And I just cannot seem to be okay with it. My friends have left me in the past, all throughout my life. I do have some friends, just I keep myself quiet in fear that they will be pushed away. One of my old friends sat me down and told me I needed to chill, and guess what? I took that into consideration, and unfortunately he stopped talking to me. What do I do? This has caused me so much anxiety, emotional pain, and it has gotten out of hand and has led to things such as self harm. I have reached out to a Psychiatrist and scored very high for having ADHD. On the first visit to the Psyh, he was very quick to prescribe me Adderal. Adderal does help chill me out (actually when I take it occasionally it would chill me out more than when I use to smoke weed. First time taking it I want to build a hammock, instead of studying) but consistently use does not help , but I am questioning if this medication is right for me. But this is something I have to bring up with my Doctor. This issue has been going on before taking any meds. Leo talked about "it's very root chakra" in terms of conversation, dating, and just out getting laid, but how do you get into your root chakra if you're so far in your head? I watched a lot of conversation advice, and when I am in actually conversation, I am not able to think about these principles, while not being too logical. I've tried "letting go" of thinking about the right thing to say/text, and watch a lot of Aaron Doughty's video about raising vibration and working through childhood trauma. If I go out there, see some positive feedback, and it goes down the drain, I get stuck in this "you gotta take responsibility" and it becomes this Self Gaslighting and it like I'm walking in a mine field not knowing where the mines are at. I'm not needy per say, I just want to handle this area of my life as soon as I can, because if not, then it will come out later on in life and it will be creepy as hell. "Fill your own cup bro". Look, i've had girlfriends who have told me they love me, and I almost broke up with one because she kept wanting to drink and I want to not drink so I can recover for my gym sessions. It's not about the girlfriend. But it's satisfying the basic need of sex. How do you let go of sexual desire when you have a very high drive? I'm thinking that because I have such a strong desire for sex, I kind of don't care about getting to know the girl. This may sound weird, but I've tried to watch porn (i stopped watching it in my early 20's) and just tried letting go of sexual attachments, and when busting a nut I also let go of the cheap orgasm so I don't feel it anymore. But this sounds insanely unhealthy. What am I missing besides confidence? I genuinely enjoy talking to people. As a matter of fact, I've worked at my Father's Truck Stop for 10+ years so my Customer Service Skills are on point. Sorry if this is a long post. But this literally the only thing holding me back from being successful with women. Thank you, much love

Hey there, hope all is well. Just want to start off by saying I've been following Self Help especially Actualized, and have even took the Life Purpose Course for awhile. After watching the recent video about Exhausting Materialistic Desire, there's a particular domain that needs to be handled ASAP. Doing the Letting Go technique has helped, but needs to be Exhausted, as it as made a huge impact on my mental health, deteriorating it to the point where I cut out caffeine, and take 5mg Adderall to calm me down. The topic is... dating. In no way shape or form am I blaming Leo, but after listening to his content, I've become very analytical. That is not a bad thing, I am glad I've developed the ability to think deeper. But this has had a major negative impact on my dating life. I think too much in social settings. ''Just be yourself'', well, that's a problem. When I am myself, I tend to say some really bizarre, socially uncalibrated things which pushes people away. I am able to create a good first impression. ''Why not read Dale's famous book''. I think so much in social settings that if I were to think about any social principles, I would start thinking too much and lose the ''flow'' of the conversation. It's been like this before watching self help content, just got worst after investing a lot of time into Leo's work (which is NOT a bad thing, very happy that Leo does what he does) The thing is, I've placed a high value of being able to attract a partner, being a man whore, and making a lot of friends, because socializing with people is very fulfilling because it's fun. I also enjoy my alone time just as much. But the thing is, in conversations, I think too much, plain and simple. After hearing and contemplating things such as ''social matrix has no meaning, being alone is the way to go, not needing other people etc.'', it's safe to say I've taken that to the extreme and it doesn't help the situation. Currently I am in college, studying Computer Science and love every course that I've been in except non relevant classes. I see a female that I find attractive, and I would like to approach and make a conversation. Things run in my mind such as what do I say, how do I show intent without being creepy, this and that thing. On the other side of the spectrum, I'll say some bizarre things. Case in point, I went out on Halloween with a Female friend who brought 2 of her female friends with her. I got to know them, we had fun pre gamming. We went to a small house party before the main event, and there were a bunch of females there. Did I get into my head about what to say? Nope, I had some alcohol in me to loosen me up. I talked to almost everyone there. 45 min into the party, my female friends came up to me and asked me ''Are the other girls being mean to you?'' I said ''No why?''. My main friend, who knows about my social skills, and knows how I am big into self help told me 'because you're being cringy'. She didn't say this in a bad way, she followed up with ''just be yourself''. Welp... that was myself. If I start filtering what to say, I then think to myself, ''this socializing is pointless''. My friend has told me ''I am too woke to be socializing with college people'' This translate into dating as well. I've had success in the past. but I'm too much into my head about what to do. I've also seen way to many dating advice on YouTube, and there's so much information out there, it becomes hard to apply anything. Currently, I am following the channel Alpha Male Strategies. He does have some pretty toxic content, as it is Red Pill, but he also talks about having Purpose, Hobbies, and not needing women for a source of happiness. Does anyone have any recommendations? Please don't say ''Let go of outcome'' because I try my best to do so. It's even been as far as letting go too much. Also, you're probably thinking ''don't hang out with people that don't appreciate you''. While I agree, there's comes a point in time where you sit down and say ''what's wrong with me'' Another issue is that if I am socializing with someone, and I say something bizarre, I have a lot of difficulty letting that go. I get angry, shameful of myself because I am way to hard on myself, which is a topic for another time. Hope this wasn't too long. Have a great rest of your day

Before I discovered Actualized.org, I was more on the social side. For about 3 years or so I followed Leo's work while at the same time, I slowly stopped hanging out with my friends, and I became more introverted. For the past year and a half I was dating this girl that's more extroverted than I am (big into self help and religion) so that was the most of my social life (also hung without from time to time with her religious group (couldn't bond because I wasn't at stage blue)). We split ways and 5 months post break up, I isolated myself. I isolated myself and now slowly getting back into Leo's work. (I fell off big time). Now I decided to go back to college at what's considered to be the most diverse, and the 5th largest school in my state. I went to middle, high, and community college in a rural area where diversity was at it's minimum. Because for the past 3 years of being introverted, I find it a bit difficult wanting to connect with people at my new diverse school. Listening to Leo, contemplating about the ideas, and meditating, it makes me not want to talk to people. It makes me think more than I already do. I would love to have a healthy social life, but I feel as though I would have to cut down listening to Leo (or any self help that's above stage orange (Actualized, Infinite Waters(maybe) , Elliot Hulse) to become more social as I won't have deep topics to think about. Has anyone else experienced this before? What are your recommendations for balancing this out?

*****Not pro mormon or pro religion******* I am not promoting this or any religion bare this in mind Hope this isn't going to be taken down as this is gray area, but please bare with me, this is a bit crazy and I need some help/ your opinion with reconciliation. Althought Leo says no religion, this is focused on what I felt, not the religion itself. Not sure if this would go under the dating section, but this has to do with being conscious and direct experience. Quick background info, I have been watching actualized.org since late 2015 and have been meditating on off (yeah I know it needs to be daily) since early 2016) Early 2017 I dated this full blooded mormon (yeah crazy of me right?) and not only was she beautiful, but her personality was so strong such that I gave her a chance and didn't judge someone just because they are a certain religion. She would share with me things about the religion and somethings sounded good, some didn't sound right, but we never got into an argument over these things. We went to NYC to see my sister for New Years 2018, and before we went to see the ball drop, she had requested if I took her to see the Mormon Temple in NYC and so I did. (For those that don't know, you can occasionally go inside if you are a super mormon, but anyone can go in the front lobby). I glanced inside the temple and I had this weird vibe about it, I felt "calm and tranquility" and I was 100 % aware of what I was feeling and I was questioning it to death. I briefly contemplated the situation and moved on, it was cold as balls. After we left NYC we headed back home (Virginia) we took 95 so we had to pass through Washington DC, and within DC is another temple that my girlfriend requested to see. This is were things started to freak me out a bit. When we were headed back, I had an option to take an exit that will eventually lead back to the same road, something happened that caused me to take one of the two road (not sure which and why) but several miles down the road (this was at night keep this is mind and my girlfriend was asleep) in the distant on top of a hill, out of nowhere, I saw this gigantic building that was lit up and it was marble and gold, kinda looked like a castle. I was not expecting the temple to be on this road. Immediately when I saw it I automatically felt good inside, I felt some joy, excitement, and relief and in my mind was PURE SKEPTICISM. I woke my girlfriend up and she was happy to see that. She asked to take the exit for the temple and I did. While driving on the back road to get there, I felt this STRANGE feeling in my Solar Plexus Chakra, it was feeling of joy and major confusion. I felt as though that what ever I was feeling could grow more and more throughout my entire body and eventually I can burst into tears. When we went to the front gate, it was closed, but oddly something inside told me to drive farther up (this temple was closed) and the second gate was open. We drove in and she wanted to say a prayer so I let her do her thing. I like to close my eyes and witness the peace and quiet where ever I can find it and I did so after she prayed. When we drove out, immediately the building lights (lights on the physical building on the outside) turned off. This honestly felt paranormal. What do you think this feeling is? I am curious. The reason I am posting this 8 months later is because she recently broke up with me because I wont be able to "understand her" and will create problems and I can't stop thinking about this situation. Thanks friend.

Has Leo talked about OM for meditation? If so, can you reply with the link to the video. If Leo has not talked about OMs, any idea on why he has not? Is it not important for meditation? When I use Oms, I feel lighter, much more quieter inside. Have you tried saying OM or Aum in your meditation? Reply with your experience. I could imagine him not talking about it because it's roots are from religion, but I could be missing something. Also, my current meditation looks like this: deep inhale, deep exhale, deep inhale, deep exhale, then... deep inhale, deep OMMMM, deep inhale, deep OMMM for a few minutes and then deep inhale, deep exhale, and then at random times I would inhale so slowly and quietly, the only thing I hear is the external (or should I say the present) and nothing from the internal, and then back to breathing. The order is very random and is not like A,B,C, A,B,C. Looking to deepen the meditation, besides Kriya yoga, and Shamanic breathing (which I need to be doing considering I've been a big fan of actualized.org since 2015) any suggestions? Thanks.