TheAvatarState

@KeenokF This forum is the best resource. I only have one real-life friend that is on this path, but there are thousands of super friendly self-actualizers here that will help you in any way they can. I recommend starting a journal in the "self-actualization journals" section, as that level of honesty and accountability will really help you act on the positive things you want to! Best of luck!

So you've known about this amazing resource for years, and you're just now getting to the point where you're asking for advice? Notice that you have this self-image (ego) of identifying as the guy that usually doesn't ask for help. Really try to see this, and how this has no doubt hindered your growth over the years. There are thousands of fellow self-actualizers here that only want to help and grow together! I'm very happy you reached out, and my point is that you should transcend this self-image and keep asking/learning! We're here for you bro. Your OCD and anxiety are fueled by lack of purpose and vision. It sounds like you are in a good enough financial position to buy Leo's Life Purpose Course... Please do, it'll change your life. I'm currently working through it.

@Hardkill I feel you, cause my parents also babied me too much in my schooling, and while I was grateful for their help especially in my writing classes, it did NOT do me any favors overall. I think it would be mature of you to have a discussion with your parents about this, to really sit down with them and lay it out from a broad, high-level perspective. Know that your parents really mean the best for you, but they probably don't have the strength (because you'll always be their baby) or insight to understand the harm that they're doing. Do not shame them in any way, just tell them that in order for you to grow as a person, that you need to do things yourself. There's nothing wrong with a little help here or there, but you and your parents need to come to an understanding that this type of crutch is really harming both parties. Believe it or not, they will actually deeply appreciate this kind of talk! Also, let me share something that will be a hard pill to swallow, but it's true. You are stuck in a rut BECAUSE of your negative self talk. Really try to appreciate this cycle, and you will be able to transcend it and grow immensely. This right here. You have wrongly labeled yourself, and that is contributing to your lazy work ethic because you'll unconsciously put yourself at the effective operating level of what you perceive a loser to be. A loser doesn't have a good work ethic. So how can you expect to have a good work ethic while thinking of yourself as a loser? Do you see how this works? You are trapping yourself, my friend. And I have good news for, you can un-trap yourself today. Literally right now. The key to overcoming this is through the present moment, which is a conscious practice that you'll have to develop at all times until it becomes habit. Accept your entire being exactly as you are now. All of your flaws and insecurities, everything that has happened to you has put you in this beautiful position to enact great change. Great things await you if you practice this, but it won't be easy and will take a lot of maturity and strength. I believe in you!

Be careful not to throw ages around like you think you know what you're talking about... Children are much closer to enlightenment that teenagers/young adults are. Nonduality is the thing that actually makes sense to a heart-centered, non-infoctrinated person, not the other way around. I have seen children and young teenagers talk with Rupert Spira, they can get this shit. It's readily accessible. Start them young, I say!

Stupid and wise are relative dualities, with the only real measure being one's level of humility: the level to which one knows he knows nothing. So it's a matter of perspective. The universal perspective, your little ego literally knows nothing. But it's also important to have confidence in one's own abilities. And you're right, it goes full circle to where you know that you know everything you NEED to be a rational, loving human being! Knowing that you know nothing while simultaneously being happy that you know everything you need, and if you don't currently, then you have the tools to gain greater understanding.

I really resonate with that, cause I'm slowly but surely getting there. I've been extremely unhappy with a resting bitch face for most of my life, so it's REALLY strange to smile and get happiness back! And that freaks me out, almost like I did something wrong. I also notice that perhaps the way I maintain eye contact (is it too intense, too inquisitive?) can really weird out some people, so that's new. That's where all this stuff is headed, is it not? All this is is a love simulator...

This is not a gospel to actively seek spreading. That in itself is very dangerous, as most people are honestly not ready to hear that we're living in a dream, everything they've ever been told is a lie, and that they are God. Unbelievable, I know.... And not only that, that's how this shit gets turned into a cult, an ideology, and a religion, because the masses are not developed enough to think for themselves in a radically openminded manner. Leo pointed this out very eloquently at the end of his latest video on Cult Psychology. I share the same sentiment as others here, and that is to lead by example. If you truly love this stuff, that is the only way to embody these teachings in a healthy way. THE ONLY WAY for low consciousness people to listen and take note. Love is a superpower that is wonderfully infectious and instantly recognized by all walks (or crawls) of life. Spread that, and the people will come.

Yes, I was unable to post anything for a couple days. It is working now!

@lostmedstudent there's a great lesson to be learned here, and it's a paradox: that we are the most indecisive when we know exactly what we want, and are strongly intuitive about a situation. Indecisiveness arises when we aren't in touch with, or actively deny this intuition, because the intuition simply won't allow us to let it go like it didn't matter. But trust me, it's there. In fact, you know what the right choice is so deeply that your rational mind can't explain it, and you're driving yourself crazy with all this mind interference to try and drown it out. Notice that you can convincingly reason for both choices, and that the reasoning process is not "scientific" but highly driven by emotions and egoic desires. Try to LET GO, and the right choice will become apparent soon, although it may take some time to get in touch with intuition and to deconstruct your walls. I hope this video sheds some light on the phenomena of interference that I'm talking about:

I wasn't able to post the last couple days because of problems with how my phone and PC were responding to this site, but rest assured, I've stayed strong! If you're reading this, thank you for the support. This is big stuff for me! Day 9: Energy: 4 Awareness: 4 Sexual thoughts/urges: 3 Self-esteem: 4 Social confidence: 4 Day 10: Energy: 3 Awareness: 3 Sexual thoughts/urges: 4 Self-esteem: 4 Social confidence: 4 Day 10 was yesterday. It was definity an "off" day. I have set my expectations properly this time, and I completely anticipate feeling moody and down in the dumps for at least another 2 weeks. I get it.

Huge ego trap, and pretty common.

Precisely. There are many degrees and forms of the realization of ego death (almost synonymous with enlightenment). The ego death itself is an experience (like an enlightenment), but the actualization is the steady and difficult process of learning to live harmoniously with it. Do not shame your ego, for that is a part of you. You could not continue being YOU if you demolished your ego! You'd just dissolve into the universe as nondual consciousness, unable to function as a social creature. Of course what we're after is non-dual awakening, but you have to integrate that with reality. That is where the real growth happens. It is the paradox of staying on your toes, but never taking life so seriously, an idea so beautiful illustrated in The Alchemist by the parable of a man sightseeing while instructed to hold a spoonful of oil without spilling it. It's easy to see why this is such a difficult task for the ego.

@CreamCat think of ego death as losing attachment to your sense of self, and seeing it for what it is. Your ego still exists, but you have the ability to not be controlled by it. You still need the ego to survive, but your relationship with it is quite advanced and nuanced. I hope that helped!

@ShugendoRa get a new gf. Not letting your SO do something like spiritual practice is a huge red flag. You COULD try to convince her that what you're doing is beneficial, but it usually never works out when you try to change other people. Don't waste your time with people who bring you down.

@billytblack I highly recommend a lemon tek preparation, and my favorite method of ingestion is a fruit smoothie. Just throw some fresh fruit, cold spring water, mushrooms, and the juice from a squeezed whole lemon into a blender and blend. Afterwards, keep it in your fridge for 20 minutes before drinking. Delicious, and in my experience no nausea. The lemon tek will make it stronger, so shoot for 2.5-3g on your next dose, it will be as strong as 4g regular, if not more.

Day 8: Energy: 4 Awareness: 4 Sexual thoughts/urges: 3 Self-esteem: 4 Social confidence: 4

Day 7: Energy: 3 Awareness: 3 Sexual thoughts/urges: 3 Self-esteem: 3 Social confidence: n/a

You got this man! Cannabis and psychedelics are also a trigger for me too. So I'm taking a complete break from these things until my 90 days are over. It would be wise for you to do this same.

I wouldn't even be mad

Day 6: Energy: 3 Awareness: 3 Sexual thoughts/urges: 2 Self-esteem: 3 Social confidence: 3

@Ampresus That's amazing you're starting this stuff at such a young age. This video is extremely important in order to organize and retain all the self-development info: Also, Leo's LP course is NOT a waste of time or money. You definitely want to do it before you finish high school, perhaps in a couple years. Plan to watch ALL of Leo's videos over the next year or so, and take careful notes. You will grow so much it won't even be funny. Treat it like another class, but much more fun and helpful. You will be in the top 0.00001% of kids your age, no doubt. This won't take too much time and effort, just an hour or two a day. It's also important to not over-do this work at your age. An hour or 2 a day AT THE MOST, the rest should be socializing, playing, whatever. Good luck!

Leo said he HAS been working on it for years already. I bet it comes out within 3-4 years at most, and I'll be looking forward to it.

@zambize my initial reaction: There's no playing shit like that off. You kind of have to laugh about it, and accept it. Syncs of this magnitude have become normal for me. I'd say repeat insane syncs were key in my awakening to the reality we are in, then they settle down eventually a little bit. But it's just a way of life now.

Liquid mushrooms are that good, huh? I was wondering if they were worth it for the smoother trip and lowered nausea, perhaps I should try them sometime...

You can just eat them... You can also do something much better. There is a technique known as Lemon Tek. The absolute best method of ingestion is to make a fruit smoothie by putting fruit, cold spring water, your mushrooms, and the juice from a squeezed whole lemon into a blender and blend it. Let that sit in your fridge for 20 minutes. Then drink. The lemon potentiates your mushrooms and allows for a smoother and stronger trip. The smoothie makes the ingestion palatable and enjoyable. It's so good. I would say 1g is really low, you won't feel much. 1.5-2g would be a much better starting dose, but still very manageable. Good luck! And remember, set and setting are everything. Make it as comfortable and stress-free as possible.