Brittany

A love based on conditions is blackmail. There is no such thing as "going upwards" and "going downwards". That is an illusion of the matrix mind. I am reading your post and I don't see any bad decisions. It sounds like you are on a good track. You are being honest about what you want and how you feel. Many people become doctors and are miserable because they never thought twice about their decision. Outside of medicine and German, what else are you interested in?

I WANT is the home. This is the death of the "one that wants". The "one that wants" does not WANT to die. haha To find it's home, look at the I ____ and the I AM______. Ex: I want happiness. I feel love. I AM angry. I AM SAD. I AM successful . I AM a failure. I AM ugly. I AM beautiful. I want to go to Bali. Anything you put after I_______ or I AM______, is where you will find the home.

This is not a bad place to be. Truth is everywhere. You won't find it in a box.

When you are stage turquoise, everything that you watch can bring pleasure to you.

Paul Smit made a movie about Non-Duality. I haven't had a chance to watch it yet though - so I can't give a review.

I got high when reading her "Experience of No-Self" book.

I wish I knew about "not knowing" or "unknowing" or "knowing nothing" or "before thought" or "prior to thinking". haha

Neville Goddard is a potent resource for this. But I would proceed with caution. His work has caused many people to fall into a solipsism trap of "I am GOD and the only GOD that exists.", when applied incorrectly.

This. It is a bottomless pit. You can meet someone who soothes the ache but if they leave you or die, the hunger will come back. There is nothing wrong with meeting people who soothe the ache. But using loved ones, partners, family, friends, etc. to soothe your ache is like covering a thorn. Finding out why you are aching in the first place, is pulling out the thorn. This path is not widely traveled.

Another Christian conservative example of Turquoise. "I am the moon with no light of my own." It's extremely metaphorical. The ego cannot separate itself from the whole - even though it tries to. The ego is like the moon that needs the sun to shine. The wave needs the ocean.

Christian conservative examples of stage Turquoise and ego surrender. It is like a melting into God. People in church literally look HIGH sometimes and now I understand haha Because they ARE high -- for like 3 minutes. haha Their ego surrenders for a couple of seconds. It is not liberation/enlightenment because they haven't had the "I AM GOD" realization. And they are still terrified of the creations they have made - the terror of their creations is leading to the ego surrender. "Make me. Mold me. Use Me. Fill Me. I give my life to you, the potter's hand" - this is a Christian version of ego surrender

"Everyone is you Pushed Out" from Neville Goddard is getting extremely popular online. It is a powerful application of non-duality. I am curious to know what the Actualized.org community thinks about it. The video below blew me away:

When you see these 5 statements..... you have reached the end of language: 1. The ego is [good] because __________________________________ 2. The individual is [good] because ______________________________ 3. The personal narrative is [good] because ____________________________________ 4. Having a separate self is [good] because _____________________________________ 5. Insert value system that most people admire is [good] because _________________________ Only direct EXPERIENCE can see through these arguments of the ego. Once these arguments present themselves, [mind] must stop. [Mind] is done. It is a place where language is no longer useful. The 5 statements above are when the ego appears to be on the side of God and the spirit. The 5 statements above are when the ego is trying to prevent you from becoming a zen devil...... which is a [good] thing. but to say it is a [good] thing is a judgement soooo. haha What do you do when you come to this place? How does ANYONE ever know what to do here? These 5 statements are the trickiest paradox on the spiritual journey. And I am stuck here. Aren't we all stuck here? Won't we always be stuck here?

You can leave the forum but you can't leave truth. As long as you can tell the difference. The truth IS. You breathe it. You are it. You can't escape it because everywhere you go - there it is. Everything you do - there it is.

One of the greatest skills a person can develop is to entertain themselves. Then you will never be bored no matter who you are talking to.

Yellow stage lessons from Renee Amberg

I don't have a favorite book but I am currently reading "A Course in Miracles". Every day, this book is giving my ego a smack in the face and kick in the gut. LOL The writer basically is trying to attack the ego from every angle that it can. haha It's like a war zone for the ego. I heard a lot about it but never expected the book to be this good. There are so many hidden karate chop moves in this book that when I tried to read this book in the past, I completely overlooked them. It is not a good beginners book. I am fascinated with any author or creator who sees the moves of the mind with such clarity.

Go where tons of millenials live. LOL And I am being serious. Go where millenials are the main population and you will see "green stage" elements.

Timers are king. When you consume content, use a timer. Everything I read, listen to, and watch is on a timer. This prevents you from falling into a "trance state". Also - time yourself on the forums. Time everything and you won't fall into "trance states" of procrastination.

I do this too. If the quote is really mind blowing, I will place it on my One Note.

I use kindle primarily and I highlight and take notes directly unto the digital book. Since it's digital, you can remove the highlights and notes whenever you want. And kindle also takes all of your notes and places them in a central file if you want to view all of the notes at once.

I literally read about this yesterday in Adyashanti's "The End of your World" book. LOL Here is a copy of the page from my book:

Sabrina Carpenter - Thumbs

I think this is linked to the "cultural appropriation" debate.

I don't think it is. The good feeling in romantic love is because we "temporarily access truth" -- not of any choice of our own, but through biological chemicals forcing us into alignment with what is true. For a moment, your mind is forced biologically into a non-judgmental state. LOL The chemicals force you to have full acceptance of the present moment -- which is love. But it's not .... lasting love because we always return back to ego mind. So I would argue that you can "fall in love" with someone of any stage. But when you return back to ego-mind, the stages of each person might impact how long the relationship will last. But I don't know. I could be completely wrong on this. haha