Javfly33

@flowboy ey, thank you for the motivation! Im much much better now, But Im not done, so i appreaciate your post! Im Closer each day to freedom ?

@Shin certainty of saying that "Truth is What remains when no thoughts exist." As Leo says, no-self Awakening can be great But its NOT God-Realization. If Truth is Love/God-Realization, a simply no-self/no-thoughts state is not Truth . Or in other words, sure Truth can be exactly What you are seeing right Now, no Matter if you are on DMT or just have taken a beer and are sleepy, But you Dont understand. Thank God Leo gives importance to understanding. Everyone else here just gashlight you saying "Dont be dumb Dont try to understand Truth is awareness, just Dont get It with the mind blabla". And Im not saying that Truth is an intelectual answer, the fact that we say It requieres understanding doest mean we say its a language understanding. You have sit in Truth all your Life But that doesnt mean shit if you are not Conscious What that means. Getting into a no self state with no thoughts, and then when you come back to the ego saying "that is truth" is BS. You actually Dont understand, as Leo IS saying you are just paying ganes thinking you are awake. @OneHandClap

@Shin I've had states of no-thoughts. Yet i Dont share the same "certainty" of you. How do you explain that? @OneHandClap

Well i got ya, you expect that affirmation to be truth! ? If truth is not a Word, even saying "truth is not a Word" would be false.

Phenibut is the best thing ever you can try to Game/socialize. Alcohol is a joke compared to It. The problem is tolerance and It hurts your stomach (its very acidic). Also the interaction with food is tricky. If you eat the wrong stuff you can have nausea/stomach issues that day. So its not sustainable. Actually, the best ever I've tried its Phenibut + low dose of 3-MeO-PCP. That can do an awkard social anxious incel turn for a couple of a hours into a proper player. Its fucking ridiculous how narcissistic and confident the boost of the 3-MeO gives you. But again, this is One is even more toxic than phenibut. So its cool maybe to have a couple of reference experiences But they cant be used sustainably to get good at game.

@Nahm how do you know that? How you know truth is not a thought?

@OBEler Yeah, exactly was my first time trying anything Psychedelic. Exactly was 150ug of Lsd the first trip, then another 100ug 3 weeks later, and then another 100ug 1 month later of this last one. I can recall (i can be wrong because more than 4 years have passed since this) that about +6 months since those trips i started to come back to ego, to be in the mind, etc. Its important to notice too that after those trips, i started meditating daily. Although i end up losing the habit after some months probable ( again, difficult to recall) About 1 later i was probably full on back to suffering, and this has continue till today, regardless the endless trials I ve tried to re-activate that powerful neurochemistry change, although, i also have always encountered big resistance to do +100ug trips since that several-months no-self experience happened (maybe that is the ego defense you are talking about). So its being difficult to see if that experience could be replicated again) (With the exception of As i said, last summer that i did 125ug. But i would say It wasnt really potent like i would expect of 125ug, didnt get visuals almost).

How much your average dose has been? @knakoo Mayve i havent done enough But i have become because SO MANY TIMES i had sn insight or healing realization/emotional release with the Psychedelic, yet in my daily Life everything remains the same. So one day i just realized, woah maybe psychs are really just drugs. And part of the delusory side of them is that you believe that they "heal you" this time or you discovered a super useful insight, until 2-3 days passes, and everything comes back to normal as always. I have had that thing that you said about one trip permanently changning your baseline though. It wasnt permanent But It lasted 4-5 months easily (or more). They were 3 trips, 1 , But anyway, yeah that shit was amazing. I was literally depressed and to the point of killing myself and one trip changed everything and from the Next week to the following months i basically had the best moments of my Life so far. I was on a state of flowing/almost no self (in didnt know about spirituality back then, But i can remember i was just having a thrill with Life, music sounded amazing, and i was NEVER in the mind ruminating). That I must say, was impressive, and It was What made me fall in love with Psychedelics.) However that has never happened to me again. I've tried with 5-meo, shrooms, ketamine, more lsd (But lower doses), ...etc Nothing. Nothing compares to that first few trips that really changed my neurochemistry for some good months. Maybe its the fact that i havent done almost no lsd full-on trips again ike the ones Im talking about that "changed me". i did one last summer But It wasnt that powerful. I Dont know if its that i have bad luck or Lsd is not as potent nowdays as It were.

Well you just fucking asked Why Does It Feel Like People Are Looking At "Me"? Thats my answer. If you don´t like it or think I´m right, fine. But don´t expect me to write something else that you would like me to wrote. Yes, you have that because you have an ego. (again, if you actually read my thread I also talk about ego and awareness, but anyway dude , whatever ?? )

exactly, that´s why I prefer them to coffee

Because you probably have some certain level of social anxiety. I have that (well, it really depends if I am conscious of not of those thoughts. Here, I wrote a post last week precisely about this, maybe it can help you:

So there is. ??

@ZenRising Well I got this new age idea of openness/consciousness and seeing Connor Murphys pick up videos of the new era (his enlightened era) , but turns out the real world aint like that. (OR maybe it is, but to embody it takes a tremendous work) Actually I did the microdose because I was tired and microdose lsd always gives me quite good energy. The problem is that I wasn´t expecting that my "energetic aura" would become an omega/beta one due to consciousness shadows.

Do not hate me, hate the game baby ?

@Consilience ???I agree. Sure Psychedelics Will always take you hundreds of degrees higher, But so What Lmao? 99% of people want their awakening to stick)integrated into everyday Life. And for that Im afraid Psychedelics work poorly, if not even makes It harder since It makes you see nostalgic/apathy the fact that you wont ever be Able to get to those states sober much of the time. 99% of people would choose living in a baseline of a certain high state of Consciousness such as high mindfulness/no self (But very low compared to that ones of Psychedelics) that living in identification with ego/thoughts mind, But be Able to go to absolute Infinity a couple of times a month. Like, woah, its obvious. It took me some time to learn that Psychedelics are really "hang Up the phone when you get the message", I used to believe Leo about the do 150 trips rule, But after seeing that Psychedelics really Dont up the baseline Consciousness and really they share a lot of the side effects that all drugs have,Im afraid Im beggining to clearly see they have a ceiling in terms of What value they can offer to humans, and It looks that sober Boring methods are really the only option of any kind of real possibility of living in a certain high level of Consciousness and embodying/integrating stuff

Time mindfucks me definetely

Bruh... ?

This triggered a Now Realization, no joke. You re good, i Will have to bookmark this post to read It again in my next trip ?

Loved how the post ended? ? ? ?

LOL. Very funny your personal understanding of what the word Love is for you.

@EntheogenTruthSeeker I totally agree ? Having said that, it's also true that maintaining a forum of this size isn't easy and I also understand that Leo has to maintain a certain "status quo normality". I'm sure Leo is a funny and understandable guy , I would find hard to believe otherwise knowing he's had all those psychedelic experiences and have gone through some rough patches himself. But he probably have to maintain an agenda of "normality" and sometimes "ruin the party attitude" for the forum to not go totally reckless. Consider this reflexion before leaving , please. You are loved here bro!

It seems that for some stage Orange goals which some m, you have to "push yourself" to accomplish them/do them. I have started to meditate again daily since ~2 weeks ago and ive found that my overall calmness and happiness mood is so much bigger than before (calmness was practically non existent before unless i had a screen on my hands). HOWEVER, and this is my concern, I've found that in the last two weeks i have decreased the regularity of me pushing myself towards some of this stage Orange goals. I am not sure if its because since meditation puts you in a relaxed vibrational frecuency, now things that are very far from this frecuency resonate even less with my Consciousness/Soul and i now i am even more "lazy/avoidant", to get my hands dirty. Its like i only stay in good feeling activities lately. On one hand of course ultimately What i value in Life is happiness and peace, however on the other hand i know its not realistic to deny my ego of some primordial stage Orange/survival goals. The mindfuck also is that i am not doing meditation because of trying to get enlightened or avoid survival basic needs, But because I Thought my mind was so neurotic that It was even affecting the ability of me being able to do some basic survival challenges. Seems like the classic "you are damned if you do, and damned if you dont" I need some clarity guys. Should I quit meditation and get as neurotic as i can and push myself to achieve shit? (It hasnt worked well in the past). Should I continúe and Pray that my ego Will end Up moving his ass? ? ? Thanks for the replies.

I can't relate because luckily I recently moved and this city I have little friends. But maybe it will make you feel good that they don't know you are day gaming unless you tell them that, If I see a friend approaching a girl on the street during day time, I think it's his friend, or maybe its asking her for directions or someshit. I don't know why you assume they will instantly know that you are gaming. This anxiety definitely is not rational. The biggest "danger" is you feeling bad about what they might think of you. Lol.

@Nahm Ok, I see where you going that is interesting. I probably have an overall perspective on reality based on fear, and I operate from that energy most of the time, which is from where those kind of thoughts (anxiousness, anxiety") probably arise. An empowerment paradigm shift would be to interpret the feeling as "excitement" as you say, even as joy, power, aliveness... right? But I just feel this tremendous resistance to allow that possibility. It´s like it's "too good to be true". And it's not that I haven´t experienced that. The absence of an "anxiety/I can't" story. Maybe not for a long time. But I did felt free. And Yeah that felt so good. The absence of labels and stories of anxieties, fears and etc. Yeah, It´s quite the thing. ? (fuck, actually putting this emoji made me "go there" a bit for some second) I'm just stucked and seems too good to be true to consider the other possibility. It´s like I have some "fear glasses" always put on and I always felt life like a scary place. I would love to take off hose fucking glasses but I can't see where they are. It´s like they are glued to my face. How can I unglue them? Keep meditating? I mean I will keep doing that, no matter what it always makes my day a bit better, but idk man, not sure if that would enough for the glasses to come off.

@Nahm Now you mean? Yeah definitely frustration and impatience (sense of losing time/opportunities ) ... but when comes the day to "do it" I fall down to the "overwhelment". I also have noticed that when anxiety is felt thoughts of apathy appear to try to "mask" the feeling of fear/overwhelment