LordFall

Yeah a lot of people settle for relationships where they're not even sexually satisfied, I find that such a shame. Sexual compatibility is one of the most important parts of a relationship. This guy I knew in Toronto I Invited to my speed dating event said he coudn't make it cuz he just got back with his sex. He told me before they even broke up a couple of years ago that their sex life is terrible and they barely fuck yet he ended up going back to her. Happens so often.

It's very important for me, I'm an emotional guy I like to love deeply. I don't think you need a traditional relationship setup for that to be the case though. Alternative dynamics require a much deeper level of trust and communication than regular relationships so I think in some cases it can lead to a deeper intimacy and love than regular relationships. There are some times where they blow up due to that increase pressure but some others that blossom beautifully for many years. You can read that subreddit for examples of couples in those types of relationships now, I've also met people in real life currently in an open or a BDSM type of relationship that had a partner they seem to quite enjoy but also had the option to have more fun outside of that 1 connection.

Makes sense, I'm also like that. I think it can be troublesome if there is not agreed upon dynamics in the relationship and you and your partner grind teeth instead of working together collaboratively to build an awesome life. Have you ever looked into BDSM? It's also a dating niche like polyamory but it centers more around control based dynamics. BDSM stands for B/D (Bondage and Discipline), D/s (Dominance and submission), and S/M (Sadism and Masochism) Myself I'm much more dominant in relationships and when I'm with more submissive women I find it flows much better and our frames integrate with each others as opposed to it devolving into nagging or arguments. When I hangout with dominant women even platonically there is way less polarity and I find myself having to censor myself just to keep social cohesion and I don't tend to vibe well with those types. This is a also a good subreddit to read more on the different dynamics that people use to date in that community and also to ask your own questions. https://www.reddit.com/r/BDSMcommunity/ This site is good for finding local events in your city, platonic meetups at pubs or bars or more spicy scenarios. https://fetlife.com/

Got it so you felt like you guys were fighting for control and you had issues laying down boundaries that were accepted by her without constant nagging? I can see that situation being irritating and leading to you either losing your cool at her or just retreating into avoidance and the communication lines starting to break down in the relationship leading to a breakup.

What does that mean though like incompatible hobbies like she likes camping and you like watching football? I have a feeling it's deeper then that, can you share more about it, you didn't really give clues to the core issues. If you want to get into polyamory I would recommend reading up on it so you can see how other people have done it before you just jump right in. The Polyamory subreddit is a good resource. They have a wifi and an extensive frequently asked questions section https://www.reddit.com/r/polyamory/wiki/faq There's also good books on it like Polysecure by Jessica Fern, Opening Up by Tristan Taormino or one that I personally enjoyed The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy. As I said Feeld is a great app to find people into that sort of dating paradigm. You can also find local events like Poly Munches on Fetlife or Meetup.

Self-awareness and introspection have always helped me in diagnosing my blind spots and the parts of me that were codependent and pushing people away. What caused your last few relationships to not work out? Do you think you could've done something different to change it or it was more of a inevitable clash of different traits or differing standards or goals you two had?

Haha yes the classic whipped husband that only gets blowjobs on his birthday A fate worse than death if you ask me

Why does it abuse so many people and leave them with cognitive dissonance if not straight up trauma then? You judge a tree by it's fruit not by how poetic it sounds.

Yes most people settle for the first relationship that's semi stable even if they're not super into their partner or they aren't really compatible in terms of their desired life purpose. Abundance is a concept that sounds simple but goes very deep.

Different things each time. Recently it was helping my dad doing construction work in the house. Last time it was doing squats. I'm quite sure I had good form but since my injury when I was like 19 it hasn't recovered that well.

I think this can happen but not as described. A lot of career women become high income and then their dating options because a bit limited as usually women like to date men that earn more then them. It can also rub off men the wrong way that have a victim complex and default to sour grapes and disliking those women as opposed to just learning to seduce and attract women that make more money than them and offering value in other ways than financial or just working on their career/business and levelling up their income potential.

I see what you mean yeah polycules have a lot more dynamics to manage over a regular regulation. For someone that really enjoys systems like me I'm quite compelled by the idea. I don't think power dynamics have to be unethical, depends on the level of development of the people person that are involved in it.

I don't think Owen's game relies on him being particularly attractive as an individual. It relies mostly on lifestyle design and aligning his business with his social life so he makes money going out 4-5 days a week and being an online authority for men. I'm sure he's dated plenty of attractive women from it but there are other aspects of self-development that he ignores that should be paid attention to as well. His lifestyle makes it easy to meet a lot of women, he makes millions of dollars travelling all the time without being stuck at a job all day .

What does that mean to you being a selfish bastard? Like you're not good at compromising? Can you give us some examples, I think that will help a lot to break it down.

Wow you're very precise here and really encouraging high quality conversation.