LordFall

My girl tries to look better for me continuously and uses AI to enrich both of our lives? That's a keeper.

No worries, it's your life. Can you elaborate on your life circumstances and what you do for work and what kind of women you're approaching and looking to go on dates with and where you're approaching them? Have you found some success overall from doing this previously like getting a girlfriend, hookups or dates from it or is it your first time giving cold approach a real go? I'm having trouble getting a clear picture of the situation, the more you flesh it out the more helpful getting feedback from the forum will be. The reason I pitch social circle so much is because I've been in pickup community since I was 19 so for 12 years now. I've seen hundreds of guys go through it and in my experience this is what happens to guys: 60% no results at all for various issues, usually due to giving up too early, lack of consistency or lack of improving by using a feedback cycle. 30% mediocre results like 10 dates over 5 years and maybe get laid with 2-3 different women in that time. Some people in this camp end up getting a girlfriend that seems from the outside like they settled and got tired of the pain of dating or accidentally got a girl pregnant and stuck with it. 10% Actually get in abundance in dating and date multiple girls from it and/or all the casual sex they were looking to get from this journey and 30-100+ body count as a result. The guys in that boat seem to have be able to get cool girlfriends they like pretty reliably. Less than 1% actually use it to change their whole life outside of dating and actually build successful networks and brand and end up with it as part of their life purpose and it funds their lifestyle You don't need to necessarily dedicate your whole career to a game adjacent business and build a big social circle game out of it, its a good way to not end up in the 90% that basically lose their time though. I'm not pulling these numbers out of my ass, these are real men I've met and real stories. One of the coolest game trips I've had in my life we roadtripped from Calgary to Edmonton and stopped at the biggest mall in Canada west Edmonton mall to talk to girls and do game challenges and went to this new club as well. The guy that drove ended up getting this random girl pregnant a year after that and from his social media doesn't look like he's doing much in life. The other guy that came with got a hard drug addiction and ended up in like an 8 year messy relationship, continuously breaking up and getting back together and doing drugs with her. He met her like 1 year after we did that trip after picking up multiple other girls beforehand. Another guy I knew like 8 years ago before I went to Toronto was an overweight brown guy that was pretty charming in a funny way and we used to go to the college campus at like 23 years old and he was really good at cold approach and he would get into the sets with the hottest blonde girls ever for like 40 mins while I stood there awkwardly. I was really impressed by his game. He had this strange thing that he brought up where he kept talking about his porn addiction and how how was was on nofap but he just needed a bit of time to get over it. He said the same thing about getting in shape. He never actually pulled any of those hot girls and he fucked a lot of escorts. I came back to that city recently and he was working the same job he was working back then at Fedex and was still trying to figure out his nofap situation and had never gotten a girlfriend in that time and he's still overweight. I tried to invite him to shoot content with me or come to the events I was hosting with hot models now that I figured out social circle a bit but he seemed to ashamed to come and I only saw him 1-2 in my time back in that city. To contrast, one other guy I know paid my club promoter roommate for game coaching since he was getting laid left and right and that guy didn't have a social life and just ran an HVAC company. That guy pulled one of the girls I was going after(just briefly it was not a dishonourable thing just seizing an opportunity) and actually put a lot of time effort in his game and also developed a social circle out of it. We ended up partnering up on a business for a few months and although that didn't work out he started a popular fashion show and events brand in Toronto that is still operational today that he runs with his model girlfriend. I got inspired by his success and he was part of the reason I threw my own fashion show last year in Calgary. https://www.instagram.com/stories/highlights/18060769145048516/ In Toronto all the hot girls were like socialites that got invited to events hosted by clubs, promoters, boat owners, restaurant owners or concerts and events like the Toronto Film Festival. It's hard to break into that scene and if to play you have to pay to play and spend a lot of money which I don't have or date random girls in the suburds. I was lucky to a couple of club promoter roommates and I was educated in the value arbitrage and socialite scenes so I got a textbook multi year education in how it works. It's really the funnest way to live life, it sounds pretty complicated but it just starts with hosting your first event and building your leverage from there. The guys that don't seem to have really benefited from their game journey never built systems around it. Just did purist cold approach on the street and never partnered up with other operators to increase their results and build something long lasting. This is in 2014 from the first RSD Inner Circle meetup I went to and the first night I went to a club. I'm the guy on the left of the two guys with glasses. Later that year RSD had their scandal and they stopped running the groups themselves but a lot of them survived and in most cities there was groups of 50-300 guys regularly day gaming and night gaming with each other. That was so fun and the golden age of pickup for me but I'll just say that if you told those guys the results they would've had 12 years later on that day they probably would be quite disappointed and quit. That guy in the pink is the exception and he seems to have built a cool for himself and became one of the 10% that got many results and changed his social and dating life. I'm not where I wanna be yet but if you told me then the results I would've had since then I would've been pretty mind blown and not believe you. I'm shooting for that 1% life changing results and not quite yet there but everyday closer.

I think Leo has fallen into dating complacency and is using cope like "there are no spiritual women out there!" to avoid the hard emotional labor of finding someone compatible with his lifestyle and having to build back the social muscle to attract hot women that are also mentally healthy and compatible with an individual with an entrepreneurial mindset. I think reducing wanting to date a man that's financially secure and abundant to stage orange desire is a bit of a cop out. Dating is supposed to be about enriching eachother's lives and raising kids if you want to go down that path. Even just living a basic life without worrying too much about the rising costs of groceries and rent requires a pretty high income these days and age. If you want to add to that occasional vacations to see and explore the world and being able to take time off to explore life purposes without being stressed by work, you definitely need to make a lot of income in a quite flexible way and have decent savings. To me the way I think about is what kind of dating life can I have vs me the exact same but I actually spent a year to figure out my business and now have $10k+/month in disposable income. The difference is one version of me has to budget immensely and mostly does coffee/cheap drinks dates or walks in the park and have to juggle now having emotional partners and also still figuring out my business. The other version can now afford to spend thousands on his dating life a month and I already pull decently so I can jump to a rotation of 3-5 girls if I wanted to and also travel the world with them while working on my life purpose and helping them explore theirs. The difference is so drastic to me that I have been in a monk mode for a couple of years now to figure out my business and it's working slowly but surely. To me that's also the difference between looking for acceptance vs actualizing your potential across different niches as a man. If I was my actualized self I would have more women then I'd know what to do with, I have built my life with wide access in mind so now only disposable income is the real bottleneck. It seems reductionistic but I would say 60% of men are in the same boat and 35% of men have already good disposable income but struggle with more technical game and dating strategy and 5% have truly unique issues if not even less then that. I'm more an introvert than you are and I still do a lot of socializing through my communities, it's not like I decided to be a hermit but I found a lot of strength and clarity in this path and the women I've been able to cultivate in my acquaintance circle and in my owned communities has jumped through the roof in these past few years. I don't know what you do for work and what your income is but I think focusing on that will yield more clarity and effectiveness over demanding acceptance and vulnerability from women when you are in the building phase.

Do you think you are the best option of most women that you go on dates with? Often times being deep can simply be a defence mechanism for not having your shit together and using dating as a distraction from getting money in the bank and figuring out viable cashflow verticals that will allow us to life out our life purposes to their fullest potential.

You're on the right path my friend. I relate with your journey. Deep diving is great and really fun to do with women especially with some drinks/weed and spending the whole night contemplating the mysteries of the universe. That's how I started dating my first girlfriend. I think it can be very straight forward and logical though. What it comes down to is what are this person's goals and where are they at in life and how do my own goals and spot in life mix with that? Does it make sense for us to to keep hanging out together over weeks/months/years and does it look like our life will get better as a result or are we incompatible but fuck it lets flirt and she's got some big titties and hopefully I get on those tonight if I say the right things which I believe is what you referred to earlier by dark game which I get. I stopped cold approaching for a couple years because I realized that me and my friends at the time were basically doing Tits or gtfo game where the whole point was to hook the girl and see if she's DTF or not and then next girl if she's not. For me personally I appreciate a wide variety of women but my ideal relationship type is like a mentor dynamic or a dom/sub relationship to put it in BDSM terms. For me personally I want to figure out a few more things with my business to be comfortable adopting this frame in relationships because I think a lot of people into BDSM are geeks and sex nerds and don't offer a lot of value and it's not really the life I wanna live. That's my own ideal relationship format and the way I view things, you will have your own. Each of the 16 MBTI type has more or less an ideal relationship type that they're usually most happy with. I'm an INTP so I like systems, to me they feel liberating and safe and I have tried to date more willy nilly and I found it deeply unsatisfying and unsettling each time. They can see you that's great. I think forums and social media are a good place to test more radical forms of openness and vulnerability. Dating is literally an interview though they are seeing if they want to make the effort to keep seeing you repeatedly and you are worth the effort to tangle your life with. I think it's very easy to well romanticize relationships especially on a spiritual forum but basically it's a ruthless life interview with usually only room for one viable candidate out of whole city.

Have you tried social circle game? I would recommend you organize an event while it's still summer and just spend 2 weeks inviting girls to it. The good thing is it lowers your bar for a successful approach, she just has to be vaguely interested in your event or even future events that you might throw to give you her IG. If the vibe is good you can still lead it to an instant date or more direct and forego the event but this dual purpose of approaches is how I've seen the guys that were really successful socially operate. An event can be very basic it can be all you can eat sushi dinner and you just tell girls that we're doing this sushi dinner wanna come? That's probably the cheapest and best. If you're artistic you can also throw an open mic or a photoshoot. If you are simply looking for pure dates from cold approach that can work but this way is way better IMO as it builds your social capital and network on top of getting you dates.

Calibration in your expression is very important in dating. I think it's a stage green trap to want to always express yourself freely and be accepted regardless of what comes out. The point of dating is to present yourself as a attractive dating partner for someone that you're interested in. Your mom's is to accept you unconditionally and most moms fall short of that. You got unconditional love for yourself and that's about it, that doesn't even exist in most 20+ year marriages. To have a functional relationships with other adults you need to behave and express yourself in a certain way that is appropriate to the social setting and is adding value to their life otherwise you will have issue dating.

Totally. I just wanted to emphasize that total disclosure for the sake of being a real and authentic person is not really effective nor the sign of a mature individual. I think you can be charming and confident while not making stuff up about yourself and still presenting yourself like a cool guy if you don't have your life all figured out yet. That's the furthest I can go in terms of generalizations though, @Miguel1 is gonna have to elaborate on the exact issues he's facing in terms of people not being authentic or not responding well to his vulnerability. I named one possibility in my comment being that perhaps he's feeling financially insecure and not confident in his career and feels that partners should accept him regardless on dates and that's where the topic of honesty and vulnerability is coming from. That's just one option and perhaps I'm wrong and he's sitting on 500k and it's another issue entirely. If we keep these discussions very vague it's impossible to accurately offer insight or diagnose issues and produce actual breakthroughs in our lives which is hopefully the goal here.

Awesome. Persistence through bad mood is a good trait in general. It's also important to have other stuff to work on when you're in truly a bad mood or there's bad weather or other outside circumstances that prevent your in person outreach to women. Do you have any projects or endeavours that you're working on at the moment to enrich your life and make yourself a more attractive partner and lover?

It shows social skills, competence and responsibility. We all have our struggles and pains of existence. If someone leads with my life sucks and here are 5 reasons why for the sake of vulnerability and honesty I would say they're falling into being dysfunctionally needy as opposed to particularly developed. Emotional control is part of emotional intelligence and means that you are able to compartmentalize even when things are not perfect. Not for the sake of living a persona or isolating yourself from genuine connection but to put your best foot forward when looking for compatible life companions. Most personal pain is universal, you don't need to tell partners on the first few dayes about your anxieties about life they probably feel it too. It should come up organically but if you are not a person that can help them navigate the dark parts of life and are overly anxious yourself to find a partner to cope with then of course that's not a great strategy to date. Self-regulation is a quality of healthy and mature adults.

Okay in other words you think they might come from universal imagination itself like a Pandora's box? Possibly but do you think there is a physical alien civilization right now in another galaxy that will come into our own galaxy soon and perhaps in 2027 like @ChrisZoZo is theorizing? It sounds like you are describing psychedelic machine elves which personally I do not believe are actual entities but just thought forms that we experience when in an elevated state of consciousness like on DMT or other psychedelics. I do not think them or actual physical aliens will manifest in 2027 or at anytime as I do think we are the apex of life; biological or otherwise.

Lol I love this channel, our current world is a pretty wild anime for sure. All three of these comments are quite aligned. There is no use in hating migrants, they are just young men like us looking for a better life. They will not find it in Ceuta and probably not spain or the EU though. I'm not familiar with the Moroccan economy but to feed your population you need social programs and to encourage upward mobility and for these young men to have hope in their own country you need reputable universities and entrepreneurship programs. What are they hoping to find in Spain that they can't find back home? This is the same issue as Indian immigrants flooding Canada to be stuck working minimum wage(or lower) 6 days a week and ending up finding out that home wasn't so bad after all. Literally this scenario told to me by a prospect on a sales call with a potential client from running an ad that was like bro you gotta help me this country and life is shit what do I do lol. I told him idk bro try to start a business and make more money independently of your job; what other solution is there?

What do you mean by this? Can you elaborate I dodn't quite get it.

I think it's an interesting topic but I'm not sure what angle to come at it from. Tell me if I'm off but personally when I hear wanting to connect based on truth, vulnerability and honesty to me that just means wanting to lead with your pain and wanting a woman that tolerates that and have a you two against the world type of dynamic. I had that with my ex and she accepted me and helped through my life troubles and it was a very healing and comfortable experience and even though the relationship devolved into a toxic mess it encompasses most of my most cherished life experiences thus far. Having said that most of the reason that relationship fell apart is I was not the man I want to be and was not able to guide both of our lives to a mutually beneficial destination. To me leadership and offering value are much more core to a relationship experience than honesty and vulnerability. If you are non-judmental and ask deep questions about a girl you will get most of her thoughts and anxieties, and traumas and hopes and dreams pretty quickly; I think that's great for bonding and is core to a high quality relationship. When she tells you all her insecurities and fears and hopes you still need to be the man to help her conquer that and build a great life for herself. A lot of people share the same anxieties about the world and the economy and the weird political situation. I guess you could bond over that and be authentically anxious on a date but that doesn't seem like the point of dating. Life is hard and has been for millennials, we have to overcome that and set ourselves up to be in a good position to support ourselves and a family in adulthood and then find a compatible partner once that's done. I don't know what you're personally vulnerable and open about but for most men their insecurities and hangups are gonna be around not being as successful as they want to be and I'm not sure how being transparent about that early on can help your dating life. I would work on fixing the fundamentals of your life first and then start dating from a position of strength afterwards even if you have to spend a few months or years intentionally single as a result. To me that's what I'm personally working on and what's caused a pause in my dating life since I'm not really in a position to be able to be a true asset for the lives of the high quality women I want to date. I'm building my business and still socializing building a social circle but it's not really with the aim to hitch a girl at this current time, it's more for the women me in 1-2 years will be able to invite into my lifestyle.

There are different levels of comfort. When you are doing a cold approach you are at a stranger danger level of comfort before you hook the set. Then you attract her enough that she wants to give you her IG and see you again. You don't start out by approaching a stranger and asking about their deepest life struggles and saying that they can call you anytime if they need help lol He is also talking about inside a container event or a social circle. You would go for building rapport instead of doing a pickup routine. It's hard to generalize every case but you need both comfort and attraction triggers to be successful with women en masse. People don't understand this advice and opt for nice guy game and being an emotional tampon for a girl because building attraction is harder and then complain when they don't have results. Using comfort to get into a girls pants is also indirect and a bit predatory so it's not really that comfortable and safe after all if you secretly want her to fuck you but you haven't had the courage in the weeks/months/years that you've known her to hit on her. Also 99% of men struggle with attraction not comfort. That would be like having many girls that you fuck regularly but you have trauma and commitment issues so you chase away the ones that want to actually be there for you by acting distant and aloof. Some men are in that phase of their game journey but not many here lol. Or picture a business man or executive who lacks the communication and emotional control skills to explain to his partner that he is stressed due to work and instead snaps at her and is an unpleasant man to be around due to his fear of vulnerability instead of being able to skillfully recruit his women's femininity to soothe his worries and make them feel better in the process. Notice both of these cases make logical sense because the man offers upfront value and thus has women in his lie and then the comfort becomes an issue. If homeboy is randomly at school and there are girls in his friend group and he has a crush on one and he is butt hurt that she is not enthusiastically dating him that is not a comfort issue. That is a he doesn't know enough hot girls and/or isn't doing enough cool things in life that they are continuously asking to come to his events and/or hangout with him problem. The average guy does not have a comfort problem. They have a getting beat down by society to the point where they are irrelevant and powerless problem. Here is a clip for example. It features Triple H from the D-Generation X in the 90s when WWE as really popular and a fangirl flashes her tits at him. Let's break down how that works. Life is hard and boring. This guy has a personal brand and performs publicly for people and is one of the best in the world at it. Girl is bored and goes to his event. He gives her attention, she gives him compliance and flashes her tits. The attraction created the comfort. He created attraction by taking action and working on his brand and career and giving his fans value. He does not complain about the market being too tough and women being shallow and the bad economy in the 90s, etc. This is value giving, it's like the sun it provides warmth for people that have a hard life. That's why creating content that women watch and events that women go to is so important. You go from being an irrelevant male that's mad he doesn't get laid to an active part of their life and their thoughts. https://www.instagram.com/reels/Dagay1qIVL6/