There is a difference between self-actualized and successful but these two are sometimes, as you point out, conflated.
What does an extraordinary life really mean?
It's very subjective and based on your current development and values. 
Self-actualization being the realization of one's inner potentiality.
Someone wanting status and materialistic gains, self-actualization inevitably translates into transforming inner potentiality to mastery that you can use to fulfill your desire for money, status, career and other needs. This drive is coming from deficiency needs and is not to be confused with what self-actualization point towards. This is "traditionally successful". 
Someone who has worked through ones deficiency needs and is working on self-actualization is working on becoming or being needs. It's the release of that potentiality that translates into such things that could be what the previous example is looking for. The difference is that what the previous example desired could be the result here, that potentiality realizes into success, that may translate into money, status, career, and so on. But the desire and attachment isn't to these things, it is coming from a deeper and truer place of need. 
In that sense the self-actualized individual may live an extraordinary life experientially speaking, without the need for any of those things, being only OK monetary-wise, not distracted by what others think or what status they apply to you, not striving to make a career, and so on.
This can appear as "traditionally successful" but is something different altogether. 
This is the place where freedom, enthusiasm, passion fuels us, and result is often great and without limitations, where ideas and opportunities appear seemingly everywhere, as our radiating inner light shines through and drives us, that potentiality realized.