mgi0077

I think this could help. Watch it.

Not sure what you mean.

No. but I have experienced what it's like to live without constant inner dialogue. This happens through deep meditation.

It is possible to live without ego. Jesus, the Buddha, yogis and mystics, they all lived without ego. Having a healthy ego is beneficial in a world that thrives on ego gratification. However, once you know you do need "worldly powers" to give you some kind of identity (which the ego loves by the way) then that is when you begin to transcend the ego and this gives way to ultimate peace and freedom.

Take this advice. Do not resist the pain. Invite it. Let it come. I know this is very uncomfortable but this is just a process of releasing all that garbage that was accumulated all those years. I resonate with what you've gone through because I too, had emotions repressed because of outside influence (parents and siblings saying that men shouldn't express how they feel). What I did to get rid of all those negative emotions (and still doing) is to very conscious of them when they come (notice them) and then let them go. Basically, I used the Sedona Method which I highly recommend. Look it up for yourself and I'm almost certain it'll help you out. Good Luck and keep going.

Get Girls off your brain>

The work by Byron Katie can help

You might be too attached to the outcome of all your personal development work.. When you depend on improving your life so such and when you work so hard trying to eradicate your limiting beliefs it winds up biting you in the ass because every little circumstance or action you take (like the ones you mentioned) that doesn't live up to your ideal image of who you want to become from doing all your personal development work, then you wind up frustrated which leads to more self-criticism and so on. I say this because I have experienced it first hand.

maybe... those who aren't enlightened could only guess and wonder. What's on the other side?

The mind clings to certainty. The ones who are enlightened know this and they have dis-identified themselves with their minds. You won't need to ask anymore at this point. Why ask questions to which you already know the answer

It's the way you've been conditioned... Just notice the jealousy when it arises and it will eventually subside on its own. Darkness cannot survive in light.

The Sedona Method.. It helped like you wouldn't believe.

suggestion: the next time you notice your mind wandering... focus on your breath... try consciously to hold your breath and breathe in and out for longer periods... this will bring you back to the present moment.

when you no longer need to ask that question