now is forever

that‘s so low consciousness you should ask yourself who is talking there. certainly not yourself - maybe the offspring of your problems.

both get dry though and wine often gets sour. amen

@Emerald but that goes also for friendship - or soulmates - i realized. i used to confuse that sometimes when i was a teen. you are pointing that out quiet well. real love comes with trust and loyalty and commitment. that’s why relationships often don’t survive.

@Emerald this whole women are a capital thing, i use to forget that sometimes. it‘s quiet disturbing - to see how far we‘ve come and still seem to always return to that point.

@MM1988 yes might be if you don‘t read between the lines - what‘s relevant though is why women are delusional about men who treat them like crap. and i really like the thing about the media - most good lines are already in the trailer. but yeah, sometimes wisdom is buried underneath a crappy movie. everything else - is politics

ok outdated knowledge on my side - but yes it comes with age and that even already at the age of 25 in france for example. and women and men have a different time when they are on their drive. my comment was related to the absurdity of being afraid staying single for the rest of your life because there might not be enough women because they might want to voluntarily join a harem. what nonsense. or does every woman stick with one partner for the rest of her life? the problem is more that there might not be so many women on the market because most of them are a little less progressive in aproaching male. and they are a little less outgoing. of course there are less women on the market, they have more to loose. i know it‘s cliche but this one was a little eye opening for me: so women are cought up in the same game as guys - might be just a communication problem. sometimes even if it’s not about love or sex.

what a jerk - sorry but no wonder, he’s so into himself. no wonder. who could account that for reality? he’s talking about women like they were animals. maybe you should listen to women talk instead or watch some movies women watch. might be you understand them better. but no wonder people think like that if they listen to this crap. i don‘t live in the us - so maybe in europe it‘s different. but i get what your dating problems are if everyone just takes everything for real what someone says on youtube. too many barbies and kens out there ;-) you‘ve got a huge group pressure. interesting how he applies what women often see in men to a situation he noticed in the gym. could be a woman talking about a male. so just try to look for non orange women... i suppose there are some out there.

it means shared inner values attract shared inner values - and only if it’s about a real relationship. if the girl goes off with a drug addict, she might have some problems with her selfesteem. she needs someone like that for what reason ever, law of opposite attraction.

i would not recommend this you would intrude to her personal rights. that’s quiet rude. of course girls are drawn to attractive man - but guys are drawn to attractive girls as well. as long as it is only about the outside appearance and only about sex. but in the end (not hollywood reality) you often see a discrepancy in attractiveness in couples, one or the other way round. for women it‘s actually a protection when men stay monogamous - because of childcare etc. but in reality sometimes it turns out to be a trap, for both. i think most women don‘t like to share one partner with other women, not in the long run. so well you have the problem that women want to choose or what? make yourself a choice, like already said. not only in your appearance, if you work on yourself and have qualities you’ll automatically attract woman who have qualities themselves. you can‘t change the jerks that want to have one on every finger and you can‘t change the bitches that don‘t care they are jerks. if you just want to have sex with different girls - that’s another thing. actually there are more women than man living on this planet. this problem might only apply to countries where they kill baby girls or do birthcontrol in support of male baby’s, they have a problem - a huge one. if you want to attract a woman, you have to work for that, it‘s not an itunes download. the political discussion is probably more about how to protect families that would be the better idea - in the end it‘s just about how to support the family ideal. means child protection and mother protection, even if the mother is a male. everyone else is already doing what they want in privacy. why to get married for that if it‘s not for money support. just to have it on the papers? another thing is how to make man monogamous if they are not forced to care? maybe that has to start somewhere.

i‘m a cherry picker and i like threads, that‘s how i constructed my universe. couldn‘t find the one with the cherry kernel wide spitting.

actually i have to correct myself i don’t think all gods are just symbols - i think they are much more than that. i don‘t want to demystify them - as i found mystery in them, i’m still trying to find out what they are and how they can appear in one’s consciousness, i just think it would be better for us to take the rageful part as a warning - a warning not to rektify our doing with their rage - because they are just showing us ourself in that moment. and showing us what others have done to us - and make us go berserk, sometimes. it is our own decision to break that and stop the karma cycle with that. no one else can do that but ourself. it would be very sad, if we would no longer believe in their guidance. because there is spiritual wisdom in all parts of religion. but it‘s all the same book of life they are written in and we can choose, what to believe and how much power we give them. if we understand that we can see what new gods we constructed in reality. the old ones at least have morals and culture. i like their powerful guidance. they show us a path and they are real in that moment in us and have power over us as far as we let them. that‘s the essence of what i believe. if we don‘t believe in anything, at least i want to believe in humanity and in a consciousness, one that exists outside and inside of us, because i experienced it as reality. oneness and yes it‘s still there, it‘s just too mindblowing to stay there. staying there is also attachment - even when it exists indefinitely and for a part of me it does.

and what if... we are melancholic for one day. someone has to have world pain from time to time. nothing would ever change if not. but you wake up in the morning and the world is filled with hope again - because in reality we are not alone. we are with everyone in parallels. as long as we breathe. even if it‘s dark outside, there is a moon and stars everywhere as long as we look up into the sky from time to time.

certainly i have problems with spiral dynamics stage orange, because orange for me is the opposite of what’s orange for others might be. so how can we rise something if we are even able to hold our breath to counter react. if we see ourselves as just one flower between others on a cherry tree. that‘s maybe the counterreaction to my joyful feelings yesterday. but this feeling can still be very beautiful and creative. in german there are many expressions revolving around this feeling. „leidenschaft“ - passion, but one on one translation it is passion for sth that makes us suffer. a mixture of leiden=suffer and create. „weltschmerz“ - world pain, it is like an illness for the beauty of the world „sehnsucht“ - yearning, but here the addiction to yearn. someone once said germans have a culture of melancholy - maybe because we have found words for it. or maybe we created words for it because it‘s part of our culture. some days ago i was in the theater since long ago the first time. it was a peace written by an israeli woman. very contradictory work of identity unwiering. she also talked about word meanings. her melancholy is much deeper and much, much more painful and more horrifying than mine. she‘s suffering from her war driven mother country, where she grew up - being planted into another country suffering from being planted not in soil but in the air. i think the whole peace was about the triangle relationship between israel, germany and the us. and what we not do or do with other countries, still struggling from what happened not so long ago in another generation. and all of us the watchers screaming inside by not talking about it. still screaming internally of that pain, making others scream in reality screaming out loud, by not talking not dissolving, not actually learning. not stopping the horrors letting them go on, letting them scream infinitely in our silence, in our inability to find solutions for peace. the pain is in the flesh goes through the flesh of the people and stays infinitely in our countries soul if we don‘t manage to resolve it. and not only in our own country’s soul but in all of our countries souls. reflecting it back to any other country on the world. like a prism breaking the energy of a nuclear bomb called hitler, he has us still in his grips, as long as we are not learning, bringing what he brought to us to others. i wish i could resolve it - just by breathing. but the ones who have to breath for that just breath for their own problems. i hope they will resolve that some day. i really wish they would find back to what someone said centuries ago, even writing it in a book, a book they pray to every day. but actually they pray to a golden cow. underneath the gold there is just horror and war and destruction in form of weapons. some sell it some buy it and some kill. but they all pray to it. may what god really is forgive them one day for destroying paradise. may i be forgiven by screaming silently. i hope our generation could stop that cycle - so our children can be more happy and can resolve their own pains. maybe we have to get old for that. even if others want to predict our future. telling us we have to go on with that. they will be gone by then. but we are in need of an age of illumination. (no offense to hindu‘s here, respect for animals is something very spiritual - i just used it as a symbol of another culture they created in a time when they didn‘t know about spiritual diversity) all gods lead us to the same source, all gods are arising in the same consciousness the consciousness that resides in all sentient beings we can choose if we want to serve the forgiving nature of what we perceive of god - and we can chose not to act uppon the not forgiving part or the rage part of god. but if we choose the forgiving part or the empty part or the everything part we also find peace, by illumination, using disconstruction instead of destruction, using construction and reconstruction instead of destruction. and in the end we might even understand that all gods are just a symbol of what it really is and that we are all together part of it and we got the freedom to resist and the freedom to think because of illumination, a history we sometimes forget because it’s not dramatic enough and we don’t like to suffer being different so much or forget that some things about us are not so different at least and maybe we are able to remember we are all in it together in the boat that will maybe bring us to the top of a hill, one that is high enough for a buddha to sit on without drowning one where a dove is flying to. and in our boat there are all animals even the ones that are already gone. but i can say, the water has already risen literally and metaphorically, there is not much time to pack our bags. so i want to pack mine with tools and nourishment and medicine spiritually and physically and i try to find better ones to build a more sustainable world. and i count on others to pack what they are able to find worthy to survive just leave the shit in the past while walking, try to leave not to much waste behind better reuse and don‘t forget nourish the animals instead of eating them. sorry for those who might read that, i just need the feeling of putting something out there because screaming silently is no option anymore. i love to use my hands for that now. soft ones, talking to myself ones.

got my answer this morning. partly. i‘ll focus more on yoga from now on. i like walking with chi but breathing i can‘t stop that. there are others who should sometimes hold their breath. people who destroy from high high above. they should manage their energy a little more - so there is air down here for the people to breath. i can’t heal what others have poisoned for centuries, just by dissolving it with breath. sometimes maybe. but it‘s a drop on a hot stone if i don‘t have a healing job already. so i‘ll focus on creating one. i‘m thankful for the ones who are able to resolve problems with breathing though! breathing through a harmonica for example. or just breathing to balance their chi, dissolving energy. and also the ones breathing to give and or take energy or create vacuums for us to wake up, just for the reason of balance. if they wouldn‘t be here there would be no future to strive for. because breathing is living.

entered a new stage, where i am loaded with energy and very productive - problem is i can‘t focus enough. i try to do meditation. but it‘s quiet hard for someone like me - i‘m a bit chaotic. there are so many situations when i’m aware of a lot of things simultaneously. in berlin there are so many things happening at the same time. what am i breathing in and what do i breath out - does it even matter? in the past i often stopped breathing - i try not to do that anymore. from where do i take energy? is it from within me or is an overload of energy taking energy from others? that’s a thought i always had since i read a book about that (can‘t remember the title). i‘m constantly afraid i could somehow interfere in a bad way, causing more suffering, unwillingly. i know there is also the thought of energy being not inherently good or bad. but in chinese medicine, there is still yin and yang energy. do i have to learn qui gong to understand that? i might not have enough time for that...because mastering takes a lot of time. also had a nice subway experience - where the whole space was loaded with energy, everyone taking part in it. everyone awake and full for a moment. someone playing the harmonica, the whole room filled with light. gave some small money, but afterwards in another train - there where other guys coming in, selling newspaper - and i was sad, because they where going empty. my pocket is not full enough but i would like to share with everyone. with energy it feels the same, i’m full at the moment so how should i channel that. it just comes and goes chaotically. it‘s not exactly maniac but a little in the direction of hypomanic.

understanding culture underneath means understanding symbols underneath understanding everything underneath. even underneath symbols someone uses to decorate ego. sometimes they just impersonate the symbol. ego can’t hide underneath symbols. sometimes they are the symbol (but they are not it) then we might understand. it’s our decision what’s good or bad impersonification and what that makes of us.

there is this phenomenon in psychological studies where they found out: animals usually take the choice of the person they interact with ?. except if they are not influenced. it’s more interesting how dogs smell illnesses in people in experiments without being influenced. group phenomenons are maybe more accurately percepted by “low organized” (they are not) animals like octopus ?. they have more perceptual arms and count quickly and swim in water. and maybe the question shouldn’t just be about the colour but also about what’s underneath.

just discovered her, a women more beautiful than me. an artist who swallowed her world. a catch 44. woman pow wow empowerment:

just found a nice musik video of what happens when a pink in spiral dynamics blue indoctrinated woman is the woman a man supports. but what if most woman are like that: (just for an instance stepping in their shoes) women are often just there to shield the ego of their partners. while they sometimes shield life itself. and then they need their partners to stand strong for them, doing what they can and do best, because that’s what it means in a monkey society to stand by their women. for once, just listening to them and give them the shoes they want to wear. mostly they are even willing to pay for themselves. a gentleman would pay the price. and let them walk barefoot as often as they want to, because their feet are pretty, when they touch the earth. with their coral painted nail polish, on the grass and in the sand. their face lifted to the sun.

sorry just read that - why do you think green is unhealthy? i think all the healthy stuff lies in green, hahaha. green has more than one aspect. green health for example. biological healthy food, healthy nutrition in general, and healthy cooking, alternative energy and waste separation and reduction, yoga, mountain climbing, all sports, if you don’t play them to show off or for the reason of winning. of course you can’t move to yellow without taking some of these aspects into consideration. it’s impossible if you want your body to be healthy.

@Naviy that was my spark to go on when i reached the bottom as a teen, the song is like a mantra if someone trampled on you. even if it is the whole world. before we can humble ourself with the world we need some self-confidence first. at least we can learn to accept us the way we are.

all utopies change if they are proved against reality, they change from a good idea into either a dystopie or something we can live with. only the essence of the idea doesn’t change. the wolve we nourish is the wolve that grows.

i like marie kondo, she teaches us to tidy up our surrounding, and understanding her principle can help us to tidy up inside our mind, and body, too.

https://www.investopedia.com/terms/d/destructive-creation.asp http://destructivecreation.com/ to understand how i understand destruction and what i mean when i talk about disconstruction and reconstruction

there are so many more silent wars going on in this world (if we leave the armed ones for an instance) so many more internal ones, than the war of the ego or the war of gender and religion - the biggest one might still be the war of cultural background, skintone and language. the war of hierarchy and cast systems, intertwined with the war of drugs the war of education the war of money the war of fashion etc. all battled out during one day. and there is the big war against monotony and against time. stuffing ourselves not only with candy but with senseless information. and there is still the war of nutrition and health, because as well as we in the west are overfed with them in other countries they are in need of better ones or at least having any. i wonder wherever we left evolution behind - if we don’t evolve as a species together, and align with the nature and our internal rhythm and finetune the body with nature again, not against it, and finetune our experiences in exchange with other humans, having actually fun sharing time with them, being productive together and supportive. we will soon be fociles - next species unknown.