MIARIVEL

Long distant relationships are a tricky issue. It takes dedication, honesty and both parties to have integrity in themselves and for the other person when agreeing to a long distant relationship. In all honesty life is way to short to be playing games and it is not your fault for expressing how you feel. No matter what type of relationship you are in, communication is key to ensuring both parties are heard and can freely say how they feel. If you both can't get past these petty little things, it is really not worth pursuing. You shouldn't have to chase someone who feels the same way for you as you do them. She is saying a lot to you by ignoring you, she is showing you she is not interested, her priorities are social media and making excuse to you - no one wants a girlfriend like that, especially if you are after a serious relationship. You have goals you want to achieve and your own personal development to work on, don't let someone ignoring you bother you. Ask to talk about it once and for all and if it can't be done, its time to cut ties. You should know what your worth is and how much of a great guy you are, find a great girl who will do the same for you.

* 5am alarm goes off - snooze button 3-4times *have a glass of cold water and do some stretches * 5.30 get up have a shower and tell myself a few things I am greatful for *Make a smoothie and then get ready for work. I listen to one of Leo's video or something motivational and educational to get my mind right in the morning. * I listen to my audio book travelling to work *Lemon, honey and apple cider vinegar in the morning and green tea and water throughout my day * always take an hour break for lunch in which i usually read or go for an hour walk *Afternoon I nap for about 1/2hr * Clean my room and study for about 1-2hours *Make dinner which is usually something quick and easy which is usually salad and samon. Make lunch for tomorrow. *shower, put out clothes for tomorrow * read in bed for an hour *watch some Ted talks on my ipad in bed whilst I'm about to fall asleep

@An actualizer Time is slipping away. Procrastination is a time killer and we are not getting any younger. Fear is an illusion. I understand getting started is the hardest part. But never starting scares me the most. Think about how many opportunities you will miss, how many great people you might have met. Sometimes it just takes us to take the first step to see the possibilities on how our life can change. Once we take the first step, it only just gets easier the more you keep taking the next step. Have a warrior mentality and believe in yourself. You have the power and the tools and the resources, now all you need is to get out of your own way and do it, tell yourself you can do it and you will eventually get there.

@Love I think it depends what type of music you listen to to. Music can be a great thing and put you in a great state, if you listen to upbeat, happy, catchy music. They say that certain type of music is actually good for studying, but a weird thing when I was studying at university, I used to have music playing in the background and when I listen to the same music before an exam, somehow for me, I seemed to remember more of what i studied just by having the same sound playing. (may not work for everyone though). Music can also be a form of therapy which may cure us from loneliness or depression. I am addicted to listening to podcasts and personal development videos, every spare moment I have, I will listen or watch something, for me it is not only my business, its my life, my obsession, my passion to always be listening to something that makes me feel good and helps me grow as a person. I honestly duo not think there is anything wrong with always listening to music. If you want to try and break the habit, perhaps try some different forms of meditation? to have some you time and to learn to be at peace with yourself, quietness and stillness. Sometimes in meditation you are even listening to soft music but the focus will be more on your mind and body then it will the music.

@An actualizer The power of now, Eckhart Tolle. Maybe try a toastmasters in your area or a meet up. Find some like minded people and get together with them and slowly start pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. With practice this will help build your confidence and self esteem. Watching videos and reading all these books are great, just don't forget to start putting into practice what you have learnt.

@narwhal Hey Narwhal, I have been in a similar position to you and I can honestly say, insecurities, jealousy, neediness and being possessive are relationship killers. I am not saying you are any of these things but I have been. When we start to love and care for someone deeply we have a fear of losing them, that our mind starts to go a little out of control, think certain thoughts, we tend to have negative reactions to certain things, if they don't reply to texts or pick up calls (I have been there believe me). My boyfriend is like your girlfriend, he is very independant, very sociable and I know he is not worried to lose me because there are a lot of prettier girls out there. But he has chosen to be with me. I usually find that these type of people have never really known what it is like to love and lose someone. They live a very positive and content life which is what I think you need to start doing for you. Be happy and confident with or without a girlfriend. One way you can do this is to focus on the now, don't worry about 5 mins ago and don't worry about the future. Don't be to worried about what your girlfriend says or does, she is with you and I think if you love her just cherish every moment with her. Don't waste time being insecure and jealous and if there is something that concerns you, just talk openly about it to her. Try not to react to situations that are not in your control. Focus on becoming a better version of you, go out with your friends more, work on your personal development and what makes you happy and fulfilled. A partner is supposed to be add value, happiness & joy to your life, they are not supposed to be our whole life. This is where a lot of people let their emotions start thinking crazy things and reacting, before you know it, this type of behaviour can make us lose the one we love and that is now what we want.

@Iulia All I can say is its time to let the husband go. It is not fair on either of you to have a relationship like this to each other. I think things are easier said and done and fear sets in and emotions take over. But I honestly feel the moment you start getting feelings for someone else and even making a move (even if its a simple kiss), its time something has to change, weather its you, him, both of you to make things work, or if the feelings aren't there, the passion isn't there. You both need to move on and be happy. Sure you will still love each other and care but its best for your future and his to both be happy and have someone that you connect with on a deeper level.

@Kelley White its so hard when we have all the tools and know what to do, but yet we struggle to use the tools we have and take action on what to do. I think we are always searching for an easier way or a better way or even a way around fear, when the reality is, we just have to go through it in order to grow from it and be a better version of ourselves.

@Jonathanz I have experienced envy and jealousy so many times. Overtime I found out a partner cheated or lied to me, I would become insecure and jealous and envied all the other pretty girls, constantly thinking why I wasn't pretty enough for just one guy to stay loyal to me. However, what I have learnt from all this is that being envious and jealous doesn't serve you in any way, shape or form. If anything it causes more problems especially in relationships but towards yourself as well. I have learnt to use my jealousy, insecurities and being envious as motivators to work out more, look after my health and most importantly look after my mind and every day make an effort to keep being mentally strong. I needed to find the happiness within me to love myself and deal with my issues face on. I sometimes still get envious that most of my friends, live better life, have a seemingly perfect relationship, kids, big house, nice cars but my envy for them has only caused me to work harder, in my business, stay focused and push through these feelings of jealous and insecurity... they only exist if you allow then to exist. Choose to make you 100% mentally strong and find happiness within you, then you will start to realise you have nothing to worry about when it comes to someone else. The most important person to you.. should always be you =)

I am guilty of this.. although I am a sucker for personal development programs, books, audi books, printing out e-books. I just can't seem to stop but my justification is that it is my business so I continue to buy these sort of things for personal and professional growth. Everything else I am very minimal and picky. Take it from someone who moves a lot, I hate having a lot of things especially when you can't afford a mansion to fit everything I used to buy sometimes lol. Its true though, the more you have, the more problems it does seem to create (unless its personal development material) can never have too much of that =)

Creating a vision board and having it somewhere where you can see it daily helps me. When I was studying a Psychology and Law degree, it wasn't so much visualising.. it is all good to day dream and think about the possibilities but you want some solid results and that is where a strong mind set comes in. You need to constantly remind yourself why you are studying, what are you going to get out of it in the long run? what do you need to know or learn in order to be a better student? Remember knowledge is power. When I was studying to become a life coach, I did visualise about the type of impact I could have on people, I visualised people's life changed because I helped them get there, seeing their success and happiness makes me feel fulfilled inside that I have done my job well. This motivated me to keep learning about personal development and getting in touch with as many like minded people out there. I made a commitment to myself that I will do whatever it takes become successful, happy and be the best version of me I can be in this short life that we have to live. I am ready for the challenges because I have my mindset right with the end prize in mind and that is enough motivation for me to keep going. It may be a slow process and there may be some obstacles but I also made the decision to be all in because I really want this and I am so passionate about it. You need to find your passion, what you love doing, and go out there and go get it.

@Vaishnavi I prioritize tasks from importance. I usually pick three top tasks I need to get done daily that are non-negotiable. E.g. work our half an hour, read for one hour, and study for another hour. I schedule this into my day and every single task I commit myself to do, that is where my focus is. Shut off your phone, your lap top, any distractions and for that allocated time just focus on the task at hand and get it done. Too many times when we are too busy multi-tasking trying to get a million things done at once (yes I am guilty of this) but when you look back at your day, what have your learnt, achieved? did you get all the tasks you wanted to do in a way that you have given 100% of your effort. Usually when I ask myself this the answer is no. So I have made a commitment to myself to focus on the task at hand for the time I have scheduled it in and anything else, phone calls, social media, everything else, can wait till I am done until I have finished what I need to do. It’s also a matter of what is important to you. I hate exercising and I hate the gym but I have committed myself 1/2 hour a day to exercise weather its going for a walk or run or home exercises because I value my health. Hope this helps.

I would highly suggest to read ' Eat That Frog' by Brian Tracey, he talks about procrastination, organising tasks, how to manage several tasks. Basically, pick one task you must do today that is non-negotiable. Once that is done, what is the next non negotiable task? Every Sunday I usually plan my week ahead, meal plans, fitness goals, business goals, study goals for the week and schedule them into my week. I also look at my diary every morning of things that I need to do for the day and what I have on. On the last Sunday of every month I write down things I want to achieve for the next month and start putting those goals in. Whatever I don't get one day, it moves to the next day or a later date for me to do.

Prime yourself - with everything I do, I usually 'prime myself'. For example, I studied a Criminology, Law and Psychology degree, there were a few subjects that I absolutely hated, some were boring, some subjects were just too hard for me to understand. I always reminded myself why I am doing this degree, what it is going to do for me later on? How badly do I want to make my future the best it can be? how will I feel once I have finish studying and have my degree? I then usually set short time limits with subjects I wasn't too interested in or didn't want to do. So 15-20mins suck it up and just do it. I take 5mins breaks in between to distract myself and take my mind away from study and then I am back to it again. Another tip, is when I couldn't be bothered reading a whole text book because I found the topic boring, I would skim through and make a few important dot points reading the introduction, sub titles in each paragraph and then the conclusion. This usually got me through enough to pass the exam and I didn't even have to read all the material I was given.

I love Kikki K ring binder planners(http://www.kikki-k.com/textured-medium-personal-planner-black), however they might be a bit girly for you so I have found the male alternative - filo fax http://www.filofax.com/lockwood-zip-organiser-0216-a5-157po.html#year=2016&color=Cognac I customise each tab to have it the way I want, so one tab will be my day to day diary, then another tab for my goals, another tab for my business, another tab just for spiritual inspirational quotes and another tab for resources, books to read etc.

@An actualizer What is the legacy you will leave behind that people will remember you for?

@electroBeam I highly recommend reading "Eat that Frog" by Brian Tracey. It is an excellent book to prioritize your tasks and getting things done.

@kris4114 I am guilty of being addicted to the internet. I constantly check my phone, reply to messages, emails, always on instagram and twitter and Facebook (my justification is, I run a business and have convinced myself, I need to forever be on social media. However, I am very selective with what I read and people I follow on instragram and twitter. I only like to use my time with things that inspire me, challenge my way of thinking or things that may help me with my business. The only way to get rid of old or any habits is first changing your mindset. How bad do you want a healthy lifestyle? how badly do you want to be happy with yourself? I honestly believe if you want something bad enough, that is enough motivation for you to go out and get it. Will it be hard and challenging? Yes? You will need to make yourself uncomfortable, you will need to challenge your thoughts and behaviours and you have to be dedication to the change despite the challenges you face. Tell yourself over and over again that you are going to be all in and that you won't give in to comfort or settling when you are capable of so much more. I struggled with the fear of social anxiety and lonlieness and it was really tough for me, but I kept telling myself, the only way I am going to beat this, is put myself out there to be judged, to be challenged and instead of running away from fear, I am going to face it and do everything in my power to create the best life I can for me.

@Jay Brown Nothing can really bother you in this life unless you allow it to. However, I have been in a similar situation, I grew up with this girl who was also named Mia, we were good friends, she is the same age and she always wanted to do what I was doing, wear similar clothing to me, I always thought she was trying to outshine me and steal my friends, my style, I believed she wanted to be me and have my life lol. However, I realised how silly that sounds. Its not a game of who looks better wearing what dress or a competition or who's better (my opinion). I don't feel in competition with anyone any more because I have learnt to be comfortable with myself. Everyone has something to offer in this world and yes so many people try to be someone else or something they are not, but that has nothing to do with you. You are your own wonderful person and if anything, take it as a compliment. You don't have to be friends with him or even acknowledge him if you don't want to, but just don't let actions of another ruin your mood and if it does, fight it and challenge the way you think and interpret a situation. Change your thoughts towards someone else so it does not put you in a mood that doesn't serve you. You have too many things you need to get done than to worry about other people.

@Peter Paul This sounded like me for a while, I go to bed at 1 am get up at 5am, as soon as I get home from work I sleep for 45mins (no longer or I will over sleep), and I usually find that my energy levels are low, and I can't seem to focus or concentrate. I have tried to force myself to go to bed earlier at least 11pm or 12. The body needs its rest/sleep in order to perform at its best when it is awake.

@vizual What is Love? Everyone has their own interpretation of love. I know girls that think love is when their partner abuses them and they accept that because they "love" them. Other people think it is a feeling, that feeling you get when you 'just know' you love someone else. To me, love is equality, honesty, respect, and integrity. I do not believe in unconditional love with a partner, because partners can cheat. I believe in unconditional love to your children or your own family, that type of bond is very strong despite whatever is said and done in most cases.

@Avi Hi Avi, My personal opinion is that, meditation to me, is my short holiday from everything (the external environment, people, my thoughts). Sometimes thoughts creep in when I meditate but, then I picture an ocean, thoughts come in and then I see them go back out to the ocean. The answer to your question 'can you love someone who is not faithful to you' the answer is yes. However, can you continue to be with and love someone who has been unfaithful to you, the answer is no. People come into our lives to be apart of our lifes, to add value and happiness to our life. They are not mean to be our whole life and nothing else matters but them. No no no. Love is equally given and received. I find that a lot of people who have relationship issues want something from the other person that they are not getting. As much as we love someone we cannot forget our worth as a person. Let me share a saying that I love - "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres". We all let our emotions cloud our judgement of seeing reason in the situation and for this, many of us find ourselves wanting a fantasy life that we picture in our mind. Always listen to your heart. You may have your mind telling yourself you love this girl, then your heart is hurting because its saying "this is not right, you don't have to put up with this behaviour". You treat others how you want to be treated and if people choose to hurt, manipulate or deceive you in any way shape or form, you need to really ask yourself if this person is really worth the hurt, pain and stress. The person you choose to love shouldn't be making you feel sad or questioning your love for her, they are supposed to enhance your life and feelings. For me personally, life is too short for me to be wasting my time with anyone who does not treat me with respect. Hope this helps?

Thank you Leo. Once again your amazing & appreciate you taking the time to answer our questions.

@Leo Gura Leo, you were one of the biggest influences for me to become a life coach waking up to you every morning while getting ready for work. I feel as though I have learnt a lot of great things form you that has helped me with personal issues to be the best coach I can be, so thank you. I remember trying to get coached by you for a while but didn't realised you weren't doing coaching anymore. My ideal dream is to quit my 8-5 job and do coaching full time. But someone told me not to leave my 8-5 job to do coaching full time as a lot of people struggle and the market is highly competitive when it comes to life coaching. Do you agree with this statement? Did you also write up a business plan and become very specific with your niche? because I do personal development coaching for ages between 18 -35 and other coaches keep telling me to focus only on one area like confidence coaching or self esteem coaching but due to my experience , I think I can handle people with various issues relating to personal development. I sort of like to just jump in the deep end when it comes to coaching because I think it is the only way to face my fears and speed up my learning process. Thanks Leo

@Hira Athar I would suggest Tony Robbins Unleashing the power within. Can't go wrong with Tony Robbins