MIARIVEL

@mr lenny Go on youtube and look up some meditation techniques and there are some that even guide you through the process.

@mr lenny I agree with Beam. If you do nothing then you will get nothing.

@Shane Roberts Do not regret anything. Everything that happens, happens for a reason and although this situation you are in is not ideal you cannot change the past and what has happened. All you can do is move forward and make a plan and budget on how you get get back on track again. There is no point beating yourself up over things you cannot change. Make a conscious decision to make going forward better for you and make smarter decisions according to your values.

@Leon Bell Have you tried hypnotherapy to quit? this has helped many people quit. I quit cold turkey, just decided one day I need to stop after smoking for 10years. I had a cancer scare which changed my mindset that I made a decision that no matter how much I craved one, I would distract myself and do something else. Go eat something, go watch TV, go for a run instead - this worked for me. Plus I would rather spend my money on other things, I tricked my brain that if I don't buy ciggies this week, I can spend $30 on a book or put it in saving or go out for a meal with friends instead. It all comes down to how badly you really want to stop and what you are willing to do to stop.

* I love reading and can read all day long. It is important what you feed your mind. * Learning all you can about health and fitness - what foods you love that are healthy and what type of sports and workouts do you like * Make a schedule of your week and what you would like to do and achieve - things that make you happy and help you grow * Meditation (although not for everyone, it has been known to work wonders on the mind and soul) *You Tube - I love you tube. Watching my favourite motivational speakers and learning all I can about business and Ted Talks is great too * Start spending more time with friends *Long walks, Runs, Hiking, Swimming - Take up a sport *Plan a holiday (even if you don't have money for one right now, plan one for when you do and then travel the world) *Start a new hobby? Photography, Drawing, dancing, making your own you tube videos? Blogging about a topic your interested in? Hope these helped

@abrakamowse You will discover your weakness through everything you go through and things you will be tested on. When you recognise these, I would start implementing a plan to ensure it doesn't happen again or how it can be avoided and what can be done differently next time. Not to sure if there are any books to help you discover your weaknesses but I would highly suggest to write a list of the things you want to work on, learn, know, people to speak to who may be able to help you and having these resources and studying will help strengthen you as person and business owner, it will also help you recognise what you need to work on more. Know what you want to do and what you want to achieve and set some goals and go out there and research and learn all you can to be the best at what you do and know what your competitors are doing, do you see any weakness in what they are doing that you can do better?

@Orange Life is what you make it & we were given it as a gift. Think of it as taking the risk to fall in love, we are not guaranteed that the relationship or love will last with that one person but we take a leap of faith and take the chance anyway. The same with life, we have so much opportunity to experience so many beautiful things while were here, why not make the most out of it? We all have our moments where we feel like everything around us is crap and it won't get better so what the hell is the point. But of course life will seem crap and nothing will ever get better for you until you make the decision that you are going to do everything you can to make your life the best one ever. Tough times are here to test our character and help us grow, we need them in order to learn from our mistakes and what we don't want, we have the choice to be better, create better and this isn't always easy, but I do promise you.. if you change your mindset to a positive outlook on life... it will be worth it.

@spicy_pickles Hey Spicy Pickles, Its a funny thing when it comes to family. Sometimes as much as we get frustrated with them all the time doing things for them, we do it anyway simply because their family. I understand that when your partner is frustrated, you get frustrated to, but you have to sometimes just let things be as some things will be out of your control (as hard as it is sometimes). You have already spoken your peace to your partner and now it is up to them to choose accordingly what is right for them. Its hard taking on other people's burdens especially when your around them a lot of the time and whatever affects them will affect you too but remind yourself that you have done everything you can do and say and now its up to the other person. Meanwhile you can work on bettering yourself instead of worrying about things out of your control. Hope this helped a bit for you.

@Ross Try meetup.com. Its the place where I found my closest friends that I have now and the great thing about it, is you will always find people who have similar interest to you and someone you will get along with.

This forum is too good to leave

@Anlib Hi Anlib, Do you know I am 30 and I still feel like that sometimes. Although I have found my purpose and love what I do, it has taken me pretty much all of my 20s to work out what I really wanted to do with my life. What do you love doing? Where do you waste most of your time? Is it at the gym? drawing? etc. Perhaps try a few things out that interest you to see what you enjoy doing. I can help you with developing better study habits if this is something you would like, I have experience working with a lot of high school students with exam preparation and studying. I have been in and out of jobs through my 20's trying different things in different fields and I believe sooner or later you will know when you have found something that makes you so passionate you couldn't picture doing anything else (that is how I feel with my job as a life coach). Hope this helped a bit.

@Ryan_047 I was 29 when I finally found my life purpose. I wish I found it sooner but sometimes it takes a while to find "the one". When I left high school, I wanted to be a Fashion designer and I studied that and Graphic design. Did that for a few years, I loved it but I didn't like the people in the industry that I was surrounded by so I decided to a Law degree (6years it took me to get this degree) and I have worked for lawyers for a couple of years thinking I was going to be a lawyer one day because it paid really well but I wasn't truely happy. At 29 I started doing volunteer work and I fell in love with helping others, it gave me enjoyment and satisfaction that I haven't got from any other job before and that's when I knew, I wanted to do help others for the rest of my life. I love being a life coach.

@Uncover I have started going to sleep to meditation music and I close my eyes and try and rid everything from my brain and just get lost into listening to the music. This usually helps me other wise I would usually stay awake reading (which usually makes me tired after a while) or fall asleep watching tv and writing things down before you go to to bed and practicing to switch off and unwind when the lights are out and the meditation music is on =)

@heeaffes Have you heard the expression "feel the fear and do it anyway?" I love this quote. Have you asked yourself what it is your really scared of? what is the worse that could happen if you didn't take such careful precautions? No need to be reckless but having no fear when choosing to do something fun is living. We can try to be as careful with everything that happens to us or in our life but reality is, at some point or another we are going to get hurt, we are going to get bruises and we are going to lose our temper at someone. It is always possible to change your mindset and it all starts with the decision to make a difference to your own life. We all can give you great advice but the choice starts with you to start taking risks and action... who knows you might just have some fun and not mind a little bruise or tackle here and there.

@electroBeam Life is so much better than you turn down your care factor to what people say and not take life so damm seriously

interesting

@Ryan_047 It sort of like love.. when you know.. you just know. However, we all have to go through trial and error as sometimes our passions and purposes changes throughout our lives. For me it took me till my late 20's to know what I really wanted to do with my life. I did a lot of personal development work for years on myself and I've even mentored and counselled other people and although I really enjoy this, something else was missing. I met a few life coaches who changed my life and the way I think about things and how I wanted to live my life. I wanted to be as happy, content and successful as them. These people I met just had this drive for life, had this passion in their eyes when it came to coaching other people and they have this amazing energy that makes you drawn to them, I felt like I didn't even know these type of people existed and there were so many of them. So I decided to become a life coach myself and my life has changed incredibly, the energy, the passion - its contagious and when I got my first client and every client after that and I've seen how hard some people work to make big changes in their life - it is the most rewarding thing on earth knowing you have made a difference to someone else's life and seeing them progress. For me, this is how I knew what I was put on this earth to do and I have never looked back.

Really good book and even more rewarding when putting it into action for yourself.

@dboyle I have a lot of different coloured post it notes around my room which I read every day to put me in that positive mind frame. If you read and practice these affirmations on a daily basis, it will become a habit and you will find your mood changes into a more positive light. Keep it up.

@Uncover I used to be like you. I hated the world and everyone in it at one stage and it wasn't until I found myself alone with no friends that I became severely depressed and it took me a while to work out why I hated life and everyone. I hated that everyone's else life seemed so perfect and together, I hated that other people were more happier than me, I always told myself I wasn't smart enough to do what I really want to do, I won't ever be as better as the rest and I will be laughed at or I will be a big failure. This all contributed to my mood and the way I looked at life. I had to face a lot of things I didn't want to face or I didn't think I was ready to face. I kept failing at school and I knew I hated that feeling of not being good enough so I had to make some major changes otherwise I was forever going to be stuck in this rut. I wanted what other people had and I wanted to be as happy and successful as them but in order for that to ever have a chance of happening, I needed to make the decision to not be a miserable victim any more. I got busy immersing myself into personal development, listening to other people like Leo who changed the way I thought about myself and life (sort of a kick in the butt to wake up to myself) before it was too late. Things started to slowly change and I started to see results, it was a tough journey and still one that I am on but practising mindfullness, and being in the present served me well. Don't think about the past or even 5 minutes from now, just be in the right here, right now... who are you? who do you choose to be, react and what is your perception of the way you want to see things right now? try and interpret things in a positive light. If you continue to learn to challenge your mind and get our of your comfort zone you will soon start to break these negative habits.

@Ross Ahh one of the hardest lessons I have had to learn was being able to spend time with myself. This can be scary and seem lonely sometimes but you need to be able to be happy in your own company and enjoy doing things yourself. Like for me, I like going to the park or the beach taking a book or listening to some music there by myself. I like going on long walks and runs by myself, shopping, going for long drives exploring new places by myself. You have to learn to be your own best friend as hard and daunting as that seems. When you are able to do this you will appreciate the value of friendships when you have them and you will be comfortable in your own skin. Start getting involved in sports, networking, seminars, social events at college, if you can attend these things then I would suggest to put yourself out there and just do it. It is easier to make new friends when you are apart of something you doing enjoy doing yourself.

@Orange Ego doesn't necessarily need to be a bad thing. Although it does get in the way of having anything good or seeing things rationally, an ego can (if used in a controlled way) be good for one's self worth and confidence in themselves. So many times we look to external forces to boost or compliment our ego when really we need to challenge ourselves to try and control it. We can control our ego from becoming something nasty and it being something healthy. It all starts with what we tell ourselves and what we believe to be true and our perception of things. Choose the positive over the negative.

@PetarKa 1.What are the best and most effective habits we should integrate with self-actualization? Never stop learning how to better yourself 2.What are the most toxic habits we should eliminate? Drinking, smoking, drugs, rubbish food and having toxic people in our life 3.Tell us what habits you've set in your life and which toxic habits/addictions you've eliminated. Being picky with who I let in my inner circle of friends, exercising and eating right, always developing my mental toughness and emotional intelligence. Toxic habits I have eliminated - getting rid of low quality people who are toxic for me. 4.What changes of your habits are you working on or plan to work on in the future? Working smarter, networking more, focusing more on my business and non stop being a student of life and personal development.

@Spiritjunkie everything worth having doesn't come easy. You have to fight for what you want and work hard to get it. Sure there are shortcuts sometimes (the elevator) but you don't learn anything, you don't grow and you are not challenged if you take the easy route. Working hard for something you want and then reaching that goal is the most rewarding achievement you could ever do for yourself. The person you become because of it, is a lot stronger, wiser, smarter and more fierce. You will feel unstoppable when taking the stairs and finally seeing that view from the top and you will look back at how far you have come, how hard you have worked and you will see just how much you have matured and grown.

@Hardik jain All of these things seem to be a habit but if you start to incorporate small steps to slow down into your daily routine, you will find you can breathe, relax and do things at a pace that feels right for you. My life is pretty much like the way you feel now, I do everything fast because I live such a busy lifestyle and I have so much to do in so little time and constant deadlines to meet. I find when I don't force myself to slow down sometimes I reach burnout and I make a lot of costly errors in my business and my work that I do, so these were good enough reasons for me to slow down. You don't want to live fast and die young so breathe, slow it down a fraction and relax - you will live longer and healthier.