Aakash

i see, so you just live life normally without the constant attachment to being the one behind the story, i neglected this part thinking things would be different, looks like i was wrong

been observing my thoughts, beliefs etc in bed and have entered the realm of my subconscious, the turns i make in bed , the positions i like to sleep in , the times i feel uncomfortable, the spins i make my realisation is that the subconscious actually controls 99-99.9% of things i've surrendered control and therefore i am able to observe , makes me wonder how much of my life i was actually in control of

@tecladocasio i will

you know its funny i used to hate religious books, but i think they're the only thing now that can guide me, into my right and wrong question, thanks for your help, i will actually read the scriptures

yeah i think your right, there's always this sense about me that i can sense the true self but i'm always in a state of what is right and wrong and that is extending to the paradoxical nature of the seeker to be honest, i'm not even so sure what you mean by that your right it is proven and tested so maybe i should just accepted that, but there does seem to be holes in my clarity of this whole process and situation which is where the right and wrong comes up, i.e how to live life after self-realisation i've started to feel peace as the self, definitely want to just abide in that for now, clairity i will do a check over the next week,

@winterknight its the seeker itself, the one that was needed to be found and therefore i don't understand why they just don't say something like "the one who is seeking that is the true self" hmm i guess that didn't work, what about "find the seeker, find the self" ahh i dunno i guess those are the teachings, i dunno man, it just seems like there is an easier way to understand the true self! a more direct shortcut, but i guess its because i went through the process. the who is: the one who exists itself, i feel i'm 100% sure who the self is, because it stares me right in the eyes (metaphor) ,but i will assess tomorrow whether i'm deluding myself and unlike before its not intellectually understood, its understood in my direct experience

with being self-realised how do you go about your daily life do you leave it to god or do you consciously put effort in yourself?

My perspective has changed - yeah my "me feeling" has gotten stronger ,but its not a seperate self, its THE SELF my identity, to be honest i'm not sure about lol , i haven't really given any of this a thought , am currently just in the process of being will decide tomorrow where am i, if i'm deluding myself etc ...

@Jkris it is in a way because you still have to find the self within the silence, it can't be found with the mind, its just a matter of how silent does your mind need to be in order for you to recognise you are the one who is aware i guess it depends on several factors including your type of method used but generally for self-inquiry just to get a brief glimpse you need a less quiet mind than doing full on meditate i think i'm not sure i did self -inquiry but its started to blend with meditation at a point, where i wasn't sure which one i was doing but a general rule of thumb is the more silence you remain in the greater probability you have of finding the true self (the fact you know you exist)

@Jkris i don't quiet my thoughts, i just let them appear and then dissappear without identifying with them and as this is happening there is more gap inbetween thoughts also i'm able to meditate/ self-inquiry for much longer periods of time

@tecladocasio well i know the true self, but only recently , not sure how to live life at the moment, just going with the flow really and doing my best so if that constitutes as yes, then yeah i guess there is one who is enlightened but the fact you think you are enlightened is only a thought still i did fist pump all day today in happiness :')

@Serotoninluv the big buddah bang

correct theoretically, the thing about form is, the form and formless are identical they are not seperate distinctions at the final duality collapse and therefore the thing you are searching for is a formless-form which is "the very existance of self" itself

btw the 1% that i tought i was in control of was not even true so the answer is 100% i was not in control of :') life!

@tecladocasio you have the wrong impression of pure nothingness because you don't understand the term it does not mean absent of something it means no-thing aka its not an object to which there can be a subject viewing it or in other words it can't be the seeker who finds it that is because the seeker is the one who is seeking aka the no-thing ness is trying to find no-thing ness itself wrapping your head arround this is the mind fuck

why don't teachings just tell you to find the seeker directly , doesnt that just cut all the rubbish, or am i forgetting the progess i made to get here i.e realising i am not the body, mind, awareness

@Pouya you cant put your attention on nothingness, the reason being is because the awareness itself is coming from the thing that is you which exist, the nothingness you are trying to find is the seeker

@winterknight okay i can do that easily now , its so effortless its sorta funny i thought i had to hold onto it. really thank you for your help although , since the seperate "i" is an illusion, the being is the chair and is the table. i don't have any further questions, i can answer all the rest for myself

@winterknight not to do with me specially but after "self-realising" which actually sounds so funny when you understand in your opinion why is this process so difficult when the answer is so obvious? AND this "i" is the same in every person and animal, but what about a chair?

@winterknight it feels like me, it feels like the true me, i can't even overstate it enough, it feels like the me who is aware of EVERYTHING that is happening and will ever happen, it feels like the only thing that could ever be me like it would be impossible to dissolve it further, because you would be itself the one you are trying to find its really weird its like the most obvious thing in the world when i was in silence with completely no thought it was the presence (me) that was aware it is the one who is aware of a thought

@winterknight it hasn't changed! the "i" is i! THE SEEKER the one being seeked is the seeker , it is i! i is aware of being aware i is aware of the thought of i i is! i am sure that is me because that is me!

i will answer you tonight , i need to do some self-inquiry

OMG is it "no-thing"

@winterknight it would still be there in the background of course aware of everything. but that is not the problem, the problem is "i" wouldn't be conscious of it and therefore be able to be it by holding on , i meant BEING SILENCE it was like a dimension of BEING, but i was infact holding onto it and therefore i probably went wrong there. @SoonHei yes but there is one who is aware of being aware! it doesn't just stop at being aware of the story called aakash and witnessing the characters life.

ahh man, silence trying to keep hold of silence? basically after a thought ended and there was silence, i held onto that, but i never asked myself who is holding onto silence because its just what was being done