A Seeker

i am not the thinker. normally i would say that the thoughts must then have another source , that they are created by the world . but both the world and they idea that it must be the perceptions source are just further perceptions. so perceptions and thoughts come from the same emptiness that contains them. there is no "i" involved in any of this and during my experience the notion of refering to a self felt rather wierd. Thus there is nothing that could be identified as "i" . "i" doesn't exist.

@cetus56 they are independent from an i , they simply exist. previously i considered all these things to be my perceptions and my thoughts and they derived certain meanings from that fact. As i realise that ,that is not the case , they must never have had an inherent meaning to them either.

no , it was rather calm and interesting eventhough after about 15-30 minutes i grew a little bit concerned that it wouldn't go away and hinder my daily life. but i has gone away some minutes afterwards and now i'm rather calm and mindful

I just had a strange experience that i'm trying to make sense of : I was exercising while listening to one of Leo's videos about awareness when i suddenly realised that my sensations (sight , touch , etc) were not actually connected to each other. Instead they simply existed in some kind of void with nothing else in it. It also seemed that the thoughts were just another experience like my sensations. I now a bit about enlightenment so i asked myself wether or not it was an enlightenment expirence . But i am still unsure on it. As i said i was listening to leo talking about awereness so could it be that i was just in some "meditative high" even without meditating as my awareness was increased at that moment ? I'm now trying to make sense of it and try to figure out how to preceed from here. Maybe you could share your thoughts and opinions with me ? Thanks for your attention

i'm not that advanced on my self-actualization journey, but also have the feeling you describe sometimes. Generally I do Medidation as it can be quite challenging to do when you have a strong urge to act. And eventhough it might no feel like it you are still getting some self-improvement-work done. Or you could go out an do some sport as afterward you will some sense of accomplishement calming down your urge "to do". Additionally it's also good for you as physical exercice keeps you healthy. Edit : this might no help you "to be" but i personally find it is a good solution when you can't get yourself "to be" since it also helps in self-devellopement