Preety_India

I just pray to God to bring the days back. I so sincerely believe in God that if I stopped believing then I might want to die because that's the only thing that keeps me going... The hope that things would be better... I hope one day I can be free. I think in the end this life is just ruthless and pointless and stressful and has no inherent meaning or value. The only thing the soul will crave is Liberation from all suffering That's what I want too. I just want to feel like there is no tension or stress in life... Like it's a beautiful smooth breeze... Wish we never had to suffer injury, pain, stress, tension, sadness, anxiety, frustration,.... Wish there was only peace and infinite peace, joy and love and feeling of serenity. In our deepest thoughts, that's all we truly desire.... And we deserve it too I think every child who is born in this world deserves all happiness, joy and peace in life. Everyone deserves freedom from suffering.. Nobody deserves to suffer... We were born to be happy

Today is Saturday night and I'm tired. I'm not sure where my life is taking me but I'm a bit depressed because I can't do the things I really wanted to. Life is a waste. A waste of time anyway. There's not much fruitful that comes out of a static joyless existence. Why are we so stressed out? Why is everything so complicated? Even simple joys are impossible? Why is health so unstable? Anything ruins it. The human mind and body is so sensitive. I wish I could get a new body and I would start life all over again. Not that I was too happy 7 years ago in a foreign land.. It was pleasant back then but it seemed like a blur. It's so unusual though. When we are enjoying simple everyday pleasures, we are not aware of how beautiful they are and we take them for granted. And when we suffer and are unable to enjoy, we realize how much we crave them and how much we miss but when we are enjoying them it's like a blur.. It doesn't even register that those moments are so beautiful. I wish I could go back at least 5 years and change things and make them better.. It wouldn't be like now. Those were the days,, carefree, traveling wherever I wanted, ate whatever I wanted and lived however I wanted. Now my health is bad so I have to be careful about every little thing or I end up suffering. It's just not the same anymore. It wasn't very beautiful but I wish I had known then how much of all this really matters. I was too innocent and naive and clueless about everything in life. It's sad now, not the way it was.

Today is Saturday 31st March 2018. A new chapter in my life needs to start from tomorrow. I'm glad it's over. I didn't deserve this. But anyway.

Enough is enough. I'm leaving the ungrateful asshole. I did my part. Fuck it. Fuck life. I have taken enough crap. Time to move on.

Make a bunch of friends online and discuss with them on messengers or private chats or hangouts or video calls. Join political forums. Start a journal for self expression. There are just so many options in the virtual world. I understand your inquisitiveness and the need to let out. Do it in healthier ways. Dont do it on Facebook or other social media where freedom of speech is restricted. Can cause banning or loss of account.

True intentions cannot be born or cultivated in money. Thats impossible. The whole idea doesn't work. Money cannot encourage someone to do better in this world. It's just a vehicle to get things done. But an intention,motivation or passion cannot originate in money. Thats impossible. A doctor who wants to save lives does so because he feels the inner desire or the intention to do it and not because he is being paid for it.if he is paid he will only do what he is being paid for and not beyond that. That restricts his tendency to help or do better because he starts calculating his effort in terms of monetary payout. So the whole money thing just doesn't work.money cannot motivate people to do better. It also becomes very capitalistic in the end. It can only motivate them to do as much as is demanded and not beyond that plus they might even try to limit their effort(to save energy to make more money) or give bad service because they are focused only on money and as long as they get it they are not bothered about the kind of service offered . This is the reason why money can't always ensure either good service or good behaviour. Because you are just paying for it. And so the other person is only obliged to serve well but not passionately motivated to do so. In other words money can't buy intentions.

Obviously focusing on life and existence does not mean there is no room for exploration and adventure and passion. Of course there should be. And nobody is restricted from following their enthusiasm and passion . There are people who.have given up their lives for it. But that could be considered a secondary goal and is obviously too far fetched and impossible to consider or achieve even when the primary goal of survival is not achieved. But by no means is the secondary goal undermined.

True life lessons and life skills are never taught in school. What is taught is a bunch of crap. Life is all about struggle and winning that struggle because it's never going to be smooth and that has to be accepted. There are two very important life goals and those are 1 survival 2 a good existence or good living These two are extremely important and when we fail on any one of the two we really cannot ensure the success and betterment of most people. We cannot expect people to have a good life in the dumps. Plus like I said before that jobs that need middle level skills and basic average intelligence should be in abundance to not only feed the middle class but to also ensure the survival of people with medium or average intelligence because only they are capable of having normal births and normal overall abilities and survival skills across all spectrums. But far too often the average is taken for granted Being competitive is very important but not to put down others but to succeed, set a higher bar and be competent enough to succeed in life. That should ideally be the goal of competition. And it shouldn't be only the survival of the fittest but also survival of the maximum possible. That was the goal of our ancestors always. True life skills lie in - having high endurance. Willpower and strength to overcome adversities - having a foresight of the future. Being able to ascertain how the situation will turn out - having a vision and the big picture based thinking to see how the big picture should eventually benefit everyone and not just a few. The big picture should ensure abundant resources and a better existence for all and not just people living on a razors edge trying to just get by in life. That's a thinking based in deficiency. This is resource based thinking and open minded thinking and not closed minded rat race based thinking that is rooted on deficiency mindset. For the big picture thinking an abundant mindset is important. All that ancestors wanted was survival. Yet today we fight to work to make money in order to live. It's like dying to make money to live. Doesn't make sense and is paradoxical. To ensure the survival of a person so that they exist only to struggle to survive and have to keep struggling till they die. How is that an existence? How is that a success. It's like working towards success to eventually set up for failure We live to ensure survival. And to ensure the survival and existence of only those who are beautiful, capable, powerful and have lots of money is just so mean and not just mean but also cheap and also redundant and based in deficiency or deficit based thinking.. It's like saying the weaker does not have the right to live. These are existential questions from the point of view of evolution and they are really controversial. Meanwhile the goal should be to focus on survival and existence because everything is centered around it and its completely fine to do so because it's the most basic instinct and intention in life that needs to be honored.

Start a diary

Time line method gab Clicker points TL lists different types of lists To goal system Self focus time Resource based strategy

Time to think something else

I always lose my focus and fall astray because of evil people in my life. It's time to get things together and start working on them and be more cognizant and protective of what's happening before vultures swoop in.

Vultures everywhere

I hate humanity. There so much wicked in the world that's its unbelievable.

There's so much greed and inhumanity and evil in this world. It's astounding sickening and saddening. Sometimes I feel like there's no point in being here. You just have to fight and only fight for your life everyday till the point you're dead.

Life has so much beauty in it.

------Creative concepts - - - A103 Intention and action are correlated. Action follows when intention persists.

--- - - Deeper truths - - A102 If someone wanted to fck with you they can, there is nothing you can do about it... What you need to do is the spread the message of love instead of hate. Because hate and evil is easy and that should not be the intention. Intention should be love faith and loyalty.

How to resolve both Problems originating due to resources can be easily solved by planting or supplying the right resources Problems originating in intention or character need moral education and cultivation of the right psyche. Again it boils down to the same thing. It's once again a problem of resources as the right psyche is missing. So eventually almost everything can be directly and indirectly be attributed to the lack of resources

---Creative Concepts - - - A100 There are two origins of problems One is resource based and the other is intention or character based. Certain problems or consequences could be because of the absence of the necessary resources or the presence of unhealthy resources or conditions. When all resources are available and conditions are normal then the problems are created by the deviant nature of the mind and lack of soul or character thus the moral or good intention is lacking so its problems caused by bad intentions or lack of good intention.

- - - - deeper truths - - - - A99 Because the system is based in entropy. And nothing really works and entropy takes place ------------------- Note to myself - don't get too emotional

It's easy to be nice when everything is nice. You have to be in someone's shoes to really understand them.

Cultivate a good psyche