tsuki

@Truth Addict Ahahahaha. Alrighty. This is ridiculous. Thanks.

This is really difficult to communicate, I really don't want to cheese my way out by saying that you won't understand unless you have tripped. Partly because I did it only twice, and partly because It's very annoying. It's like the whole world gets flipped upside-down. When I'm tripping, profound things are unbelievably obvious like I was some kind of a genius, and yet - I'm a drooling, child-like idiot that's overwhelmed by going to the grocery store or taking a dump. I feel blissful and happy, and yet - every centimeter of my body is burning with pain. I am so vulnerable that a well-timed sneeze would kill me and yet - people can't help being nice to me. And finally - I know that when I'm 'sober' (like right now), I'm a complete and total idiot, a troglodyte and a brute to such a degree, that I don't even understand what it means to be stupid. Still, I know that this idiot, in his idiocy, navigates his life pretty damn well and I'm awestruck by the fact that he arranged these circumstances in which he can lose his shit on LSD safely. The degree of my sober stupidity is of such cosmic proportions that I was being thankful that God is guiding my actions with love, even if I normally have no clue about that whatsoever. In fact, I knew perfectly well that being a tripping, drooling, child-like genius, was the direct effect of having my consciousness raised. I frequently pondered about Leo's post somewhere where he said that it's possible to be so woke that you can barely stand. It's true. At the same time, I was observing my 'sober' obsession with self-development and self-improvement and felt, hmm... admiration? Compassion? Pity? for all those lovely "freaks" that self-inquire on psychedelic substances to 'go deeper'. Psychedelics are the cure for a restless monkey ego and the amount of trips are the objective measure of the obsession with being better. That is how upside-down the world gets turned when you're conscious. So, let me rephrase my question because I was too busy trying to be cool to articulate it properly: How do I tolerate my sorry stupid ass when I'm sober? How do I tolerate my need to take care of the world and develop others despite their pleas for mercy? There is no balance to be made because it is exactly how it should be, but I only see it as such because I'm an idiot. Did I clear this up a little?

@mandyjw I'm not seeking any longer. There is no balance to strike.

I think that his trembling voice when he's talking about life's tragedies and suffering is the best commentary on his perspective.

Have you tried singing?

@Aakash

Manamana. Her penultimate post was 'fuck you tsuki'.

Because the body will die at some point, whether you like it or not, so why not enjoy yourself while you suffer in the meantime?

I recently watched a video where somebody asked Jordan Peterson a similar question, but I think that the answer is applicable to your situation. Start small. Improve your immediate surroundings, starting with yourself, and gradually expand your sphere of concern. At some point, a semblance of a vision may appear and you could work from there. You seem to have a lot of backlash, but this backlash is a sign of growth. You learned a lot of advanced stuff like life purpose etc and your mind is using that to express your suffering. Don't get fooled by that and keep working and your situation will surely improve. You seem to be happy with your financial situation and that's the thing you should be focusing on. This is not the final stop, it is just the beginning. Remember that things can only get better from now on, even if you backslide.

Your effort to clean up your life is what enlightens you. You cannot be 100% perfect because perfection is an abstraction. You can only be who you are and be more of that. You can only find what is underneath all the junk you mistakenly thought was important. The good life that comes out of your efforts sprout from the fact that you're aligned with truth. If enlightenment happens, it happens because you aligned yourself with what is real. With your true nature. Eating junk food is not a part of that, but so is being a supermodel or your own health guru.

@Aakash Here:

@Aakash What do you want from me?

You're suffering because you are not centered. Is there a problem right now, or is it somewhere down the line? Is there anything you can do this very instant? Yes? Do it. No? Clean your room, do 50 push-ups and go read a book. Your existence is free, absolutely. The fact that you may want anything, will anything, is rooted in that freedom. The act of 'severing' your relationship with God is the act of willing anything different from what life brings you. it is independence, strife, failure and success. It is samsara: life's endless ups and downs that stem from reactivity. Surrender is not an act of doing, of willing. It is easing into the present moment, suffering, and letting it be. You are gonna die, Wisebaxter. Does it really matter if it's 10, 20, or 30 years from now? Eternity is not impressed with 80 years of life, nor does it care for your accomplishments. The only life you have is here, now. This is it. Live it.

I'm not gonna feed your curiosity, you hungry little squirrel. Go meditate.

The rule saying the teacher must do it is simply the fact that there's nothing else to do. Love has no opposites.

The relationship between the Ego (the small self) and God (the big self) is dependent on free will. The Ego suffers because it exerts its separate will on the world. If it matures to the point where it is able to observe itself, it will become conscious of how karma works and that all suffering is self-inflicted. Surrender to God, willing to not will, is the only expression of will that stops suffering. That is the lesson the Ego needs to learn. Past that point, all suffering is a centering lesson. Surrender to God does not imply that you should become a mindless starfish. Maybe the lesson is that you should get your life more stable? The lack of motivation may stem from the fact that there are very few things that are truly worth pursuing in society.

Yes, it can have a price. A person that teaches spiritual wisdom has to have his or her needs met. The amount of money that is charged is the measure of: the external needs of that person the value of his or her wisdom on the market The more external needs the teacher has, the less the teaching is embodied. Happiness of a truly spiritual person is not dependent on how many Rolls royces the person has. There have been reports of people so spiritual that they don't even have to eat anymore (saints, etc). The more value the teaching has, the more practical it is. That is the measure of embodiment as well. Embodied spirituality does not come from rejection of the material world, but from exhaustion. There is nothing to accomplish, so it is transcended. So, what happens with the surplus that comes from the difference between the needs and value? A teacher that truly walks his talk would invest it for the good of others.

Doubt is the manifestation of the fact that you are not aligned with truth. Truth is not an abstract philosophical concept. Truth is visceral and misalignment is experienced as suffering. Unconditional honesty is the way to align yourself. It can be mind-centered, or heart-centered. Mind-centered honesty is simply telling the truth and acting on it no matter the consequences. Heart-centered honesty is about giving people space to develop themselves and make their own mistakes. Be aware of the two and let your conscience decide which one is appropriate to follow in any given situation, as they are oftentimes in opposition.

Bye.

No. Insights are not beliefs. Insight is a shift in being, a small fire that can be harnessed to heat something up, to express creatively. Insights cannot be captured in words, but they can be expressed as riddles that can unwrap the contractions in consciousness, like koans. Beliefs are dead, insights are vibrant and alive. Beliefs add, while insights clear.

Please don't do that to me. I have a life, you know?

Amen.

The only thing that can ground your values is truth. Truth is not an abstract concept - if you're in tune with it, it's visceral. My advice is to counter-balance your logical conclusion with feelings - for your coworkers, clients, family and yourself. The mind's job is to provide facts and arguments, but ultimately - it is the heart's responsibility to choose. Never give up your right to make choices in favor of the collective opinion, even if your choice is painful. It is impossible to make a step back because of being wrong, but it is possible to miss the lesson and think that you're unwise. Suffering will teach you the right way to live over the long run, so listen closely and live courageously. Sometimes it takes courage to fight, and sometimes it takes courage to hide.