tsuki

A bird's eye view on the situation in the amazon rainforest.

This is a delusion, please stop thinking that. Survival of the fittest does not imply that only the ones at the top of the food chain are having a life that is not considered 'merely survival'. It means that if you're not dead, then you are fit to live. You are living, which means that you are good enough. That is self-evident. That is a very deep delusion and you are hurting yourself by repeating that thought. Happiness is relative to the suffering you are experiencing. Remove the suffering and you will not have to 'reward' yourself with luxuries. Heal your psyche, take good care of your body, secure your basic needs for wealth and meaningful relationships and you will be happy I promise. First get to the point where this 'boring life' is your actuality and then you will see if you really, absolutely have to chase the money. Excess of money does not bring happiness. It gives power that can bring benefit or destruction depending on the person's wisdom. Cases where poor lottery winners ruin themselves are very numerous.

Thanks @mandyjw. As a teenager, I used to view people that tried to reach out to me as selfish. I knew that they were 'merely' reacting to their instincts and I was very proud that I saw right through them. Most of them were actually unaware of what they were doing, so explaining it was completely pointless. It only recently occurred to me why this selfishness is actually selflessness, but not for the reasons unaware people think it is.

Yes, my concern about other people is experienced as inner emotional tension. Yes, by helping other people I want to dispel this tension and my urge is selfish. Yes, if my help is rejected, I am hurt twice over. The only way that I can help myself is to pray for the well-being of those that don't let me help them. I will no longer exchange my human spirit (fragility, care) for comfort.

Ouch. Alrighty. It certainly is my problem that I have a difficulty seeing people that are done with this world.

The rational mind is the part of the All, and the All is describing itself in scriptures through it. The All does not have to understand itself because there is no All, it is not a 'thing'. it is the rational mind that has to know that it unwittingly creates a 'thinker' and an 'object' of thoughts. That is what is being described in scriptures, how the mind can un-mind itself.

So, I ventured out to incel forums to see how it's like over there. I spent 10 minutes reading posts with full awareness of how they lock negativity and still came out feeling like a creep.

Hmm... maybe you are to their liking and they could reflect love back to you? I'd love to know you better. Ugh, that's creepy as hell. Sorry.

Ouch. I know that feeling. It's the hey, I came up with that all by myself! Why should I conform to your standards of what's what?! thing for me. Funny how we want to talk about important things, but protect our personal distinctions to keep the ground we stand on.

[ Hey @saffron . I wrote the following post and realized that it may come off as insensitive, but believe me that I feel for you and wish you many blessings. I know that you've been struggling with your problems for a very long time and these words may even seem insulting because of how basic they are. I've been into personal development for many years and from my experience, it is always about the basics, so here it goes: ] I feel like your expectations about life are set way too high. You don't have to be a chad superstar, bang girls left and right, and be obnoxiously rich in order to be happy. What is of immediate relevance to you is to simply be happier than yesterday, or happier than hour ago. I suspect that it is related to how you engage with mass culture (videogames, internet, etc). You know way too much about what is possible, compared to how you live your everyday life and your mind is giving you a lot of shit because of that. I would suggest media blackout for at least few months and going back to absolute basics such as: Regular sleep schedule Eating good quality food in regular intervals Exercising and taking good care of your hygiene Providing your mind with quality food. Since you're on media blackout - that would be physical books, preferably on emotional mastery. Developing your skills regarding your mind through meditation and concentration practices. Socializing. If you can't meet with friends in person, start with social media. Reach out to compassionate people, they will help you if you ask. And most importantly: never compare your situation against an image that assumes that all people are equal. Some people are born rich and good looking and some don't. Don't try to compete with people that are light years away from you - that will only break your spirit. Start at your own pace, even if it is snail's pace, and start walking. Who knows, maybe an FTL rocket is parked next to your house? You will never know unless you start moving. And for the love of god, never, ever, hang around 4chan and redpill/incel forums.

I found this link today on the forum, it's very important: https://www.bibhudevmisra.com/2017/11/yoga-mudras-in-orthodox-christian-art.html Yesterday I noticed that doing prithvi mudra empties the head instantaneously and, hmm... leaves it vast, spacious and attentive. This is very important.

Thank you very much for this book. I'm just a few pages in but I already see that it is very profound.

Today I had my first divination session using I-Ching. In this journal I will share the contemplation on my life guided by the Oracle. I'm using the version rewritten by Carol K. Anthony and Hanna Moog titled: I CHING The Oracle of the Cosmic Way. The question: How can I fulfill my role better? The hexagram: 35. Progressing The judgement: Progressing. The true self is honored by the Sage's presence so that there is help in everything he does. I received two changing lines: Line 2: Progressing, but in sorrow, due to looking to one's ancestress. Being firmly correct brings success. Then one obtains great happiness. Line 4: Progressing like a hamster. Perseverance brings danger. Contemplation: I couldn't have thought of a better answer to my question. The role plays itself organically. The role grows, like a flower and to do anything to make it better is to damage it. The judgement has been rewritten by the authors to remove the feudal and human-centered nature of the original one: Progressing. The powerful prince is honored with horses in large numbers. In a single day he is granted audience three times. Upon reading the first changing line, I had an emotional release. It powerfully connected with my childhood memories to the point of tears. When I read the interpretation from the book, there was not much I could connect with. Apparently, it points at the belief of lost paradise, original sin and guilt. The second changing line made me smile, as it points at my unhealthy tendency towards money and the dynamic between me and my wife that we're trying to work through. It's getting better (progressing, huh?). During the Retrospective-Three-Coin method (RTCM), it was communicated to me that the first changing line was directed towards my wife and I was asked to draw a hexagram for her. Later it became clear that my question was ambiguous - was the drawing supposed to be a gift for her, or should I simply read it to her on behalf of the Sage? I drew: Hexagram: 22. Grace The judgement: Grace shows success. It is not favorable to create form for its own sake. I received two changing lines: Line 2: He lends grace to the beard on his chin. Line 3: Graceful and moist. Being firmly correct brings good fortune. What I read in this hexagram is superficiality of our sexuality. I need to contemplate that more, as I'm not sure what is this all about yet. RTCM questions weren't of much help, unfortunately. I'm not sure whether I should share the sexual aspect of my marriage here on the forum, so that's it for now. I read this hexagram to my wife and her facial expression was tense. I think she was being superstitious.

I don't consider that an 'except'. Your body needs other people to survive. It needs touch, it needs chemistry, it needs bonding, it needs to be useful and use others. The fear of social rejection is a genuine threat to the body and the body communicates it. You do not become fearless by telling yourself that you don't need anybody, but by being in touch with what the body needs. You can decide that the body is mistaken and act against it, but in truth it rarely is. If you shut yourself off from people, you will develop all kinds of coping mechanisms that start with binge eating for example. Yes, definitely. The trick is that you survived mostly automatically for 30 years, or at least 15. The body had learned all kinds of useless response patterns that lock into your family dynamic and "friends". If you fear something, the default response is to avoid it. If you're angry, the default response is to attack. If, as a woman, you are socially pressured to be submissive, then your response to anger gets overriden by shame, for example. It really is not at all obvious which emotion should be employed at which situation, especially because you lose your cool precisely when you need to observe yourself carefully. One thing is adrenaline response. Another thing is fear. Yet another thing is a 'response'. Fear is a concept you produce in response to adrenaline. This concept, if is identified with, creates a response that hopefully is beneficial for your survival. Identification here is 'letting the fear take you', not noticing the choice to be made. You can always stand still in response to fear. You can always dissolve fear in response to adrenaline. That is emotional mastery and it is not enlightenment. Enlightenment is when you understand what you are. You are a concept, a division of reality. [I don't like that definition, but I'm gonna leave it as is]. If you feel like you are in control of things, like I don't wanna run away from tiger, that is an ego. That thought that deliberates. Enlightenment certainly helps in mastering emotions, and mastering emotions helps becoming enlightened. ___________________ By the way, I highly recommend reading Ursula's The Earthsea Cycle. I did not choose that particular translation because of its quality in itself, but because I highly value Ursula as a spiritual teacher. That cycle is a fantasy novel informed by Taoist nonduality. Absolutely amazing, it was very influential on me.

I'm just gonna leave these three here in case they are relevant: Please don't be too hard on yourself.

Mmmm.... perceiving instinctual responses to danger is not synonymous with identification with the body. It's like saying that the fact that you see, means that you are identified with the eyes. The body is having a freak out because it's built to survive and you are perceiving it. That's good, that means that you are sane. Please explain your understanding of the term "identification". I'm afraid that the one that I shared with you isn't free . Do you still have the PDF file? Maybe the mods won't mind if you attach it to the post?

@Neorez Keep walking the walk and see for yourself. Maybe it is exactly what you need.

@Matys You're welcome man, godspeed. ? If you have any more questions, go ahead and post them.

Yes, it is born out of contraction of what is. For example, body identification is mostly habitual muscle tension. Contraction in this example is the 'habitual' tension.

Hmm... that seems like what I call 'deprivation chamber vision of death'. Look deeply into your senses: Sight Sound Touch If you close your eyes, do you stop seeing? Try to locate the exact moment when your 'vision' stops being real and turns into imagination. If you cover your ears, do you stop hearing? Try to talk and finish the sentence in your mind. How do you turn the outer sound into the inner? If you move your hand and it touches something (stops), does the movement stop, or does it turn into something else? Try locating the exact moment when movement turns into sensation upon contact. Try to touch the touch. Is it possible to not experience?

@Matys It is important to distinguish between the ego death itself, and what your mind is imagining to be like. If you shared your specific fears and what imaginations they trigger, I may help you dispel them if I were going through something similar. The bottom line is that if you are going to realize absolute truth, then that truth is not something new, added, and you are "it" right now.

Farewell. Talking to you was a pleasure.

Being a submissive housewife is a better place to be in than a psychopath. There is a legitimate experiential difference between the two. We need more submissive housewives. Notice that she only suffers because she's vulnerable to other people's exploitation. Her own exploitation does not return back to her like the psychopath's does because she exploits out of a legitimate concern for other people's well-being. That is not a lack of human spirit, but an overblown one. It is born out of having the psychopath in the shadow, out of reaction against it. The trauma locks it in place but that reinforces the heart, not the head. She's softer. Of course you can, if you are able to handle and observe those instincts. Upaya.

@Truth Addict You are awesome, man! Keep rockin! Have you found Love?

That's a pre/post fallacy. Psychopaths are not attached to non-attachment. They are attached to such an extent that they dispose of their emotional, empathetic side to exploit people. First, you need to be healthily attached to become attached to non-attachment. That happens when all of your needs are fulfilled securely.