tsuki

Awareness is equal parts conscious and unconscious. Body is an integral part of the environment. Mind is matter. It is both yin and yang. Reality is such that these dualities are illusory. The boundary between them cannot be strictly defined. The boundary between black and white is Ego. It is arbitrary and fuzzy. Seeming dualities blend when inspected closely. The imprisonment you speak of is the expression of ego. In reality you are both consciousness and unconsciousness. The fact that you cannot 'see' the unconscious part is what makes you identify with the conscious part. The other mistake is that you think that you are 'doing' it. You're not. A tortured person may be hurt, but suffering comes from rejection of the pain. You can be in pain and yet, not suffer. The pain is brought to you by the 'black', 'unconscious', 'unseen' part. It has no origin. It simply is. If you do not accept it as yours, you will fight it. Since it is you, you cannot win with it. Hence suffering. When you don't know what suffering is - you may suffer because of pleasure and mistake it for desire to be satisfied. Suffering is the other face of desire. The argument that you cannot manipulate matter with mind is absurd. Have you ever tried to manipulate matter with mind? Did it work? Is it physically impossible, or perhaps you simply don't know how to do it? Or is it perhaps that it is physically impossible because you don't know how to do it? What if physical impossibility is just lack of skill/knowledge?

Did you ever notice that the English symbol for 'I' is a line? A line that divides to fragments, and yet - all fragments touch it forming a whole. It's like the language itself mocks us. It lets us ask, but forbids to answer. When you know, you cannot say. When you say, you cannot know. Reality is perfect.

Fuck yes it is. A miracle.

We all start somewhere. Even those that have deep understanding of spirituality. Accepting your ignorance is a good place to start if you're willing to rely on yourself in your pursuit of understanding. That is what I meant in the original post.

@Dali Llama Sorry, I was being a smartass. What does our opinion matter to you?

One can never be wrong by calling oneself stupid. You'll fit right in.

Truth resides within the title itself: absolute infinity. The infinity so infinite that it contains itself. It's nonsense. The rest of the video is unpacking of this concept. Reality is a paradox. It does not compute. You are this absolute infinity. An animal that can contain itself within its mind. Nonsense that is existence.

Truth is nonsensical to the mind. It does not compute. It doesn't matter what he says as long as it is nonsense. There is one nonsense, just as there is one truth. I don't think that his video is a satire. It is a honest and accurate explanation.

@Jarrad Your crisis is rooted in your trust in reason. Reason is a man-made concept related to other man-made concepts of cause and effect. You are not doing things because you have reasons to do them. Things do themselves and you narrate them as you go. We think that we do things because we want to do them. To us, will is a cause of actions. The problem is that will is an action in itself and we very rarely want to want before we want. How is then our wanting ours, if wanting is not caused by us? It isn't. Wanting simply is and we define ourselves against or in accord with it. Human animal has no capacity for reason in the sense of imposing its will onto reality through actions. Reality plays itself out through our wants, desires, reasons and meanings. We are mere puppets. Godly puppets but still, puppets. To claim ownership of Logos, Tao, etc is a grave mistake. To let go of control is to gain freedom. Isn't that the greatest paradox?

Difficult to say as people call ego all sorts of different things. If you call ego the body-mind living human being 'name surname' real person, then yes. You can further refine this concept and start noticing its effect in everyday situations. From my point of view, ego is always present even if I'm aware that I'm not the 'name surname' person. This way I'm not concerned as much as being in any state in particular and awareness simply flows and perspective always shifts unconstrained. As for mystical states - I'm experiencing them quite frequently, but I'm not seeing them as the objective of seeking. They are more of an experience of great awe and wonder about the world. Working on noticing obviousness seems to help a lot in moving towards this. So - are you deceiving yourself? Yes. Result of self-deception is reality. In your current reality you're questioning whether you're enlightened or not. You had a thought-image that you thought that you are enlightened, but this thought-image has questionable certainty. You can only answer this question through the same mechanism that creates the deception you are trying to dispel. Even if I answer your question, you will not question my answer if you want to have any sort of certainty. Any concrete truth you cling to is born out of self-deception. You cannot cling to the truth of being enlightened if you are truly enlightened.

I'm strong enough to love my weaknesses.

There is no difference between matter being intelligent and you seeing it as intelligent. Is matter governed by laws of cause and effect and obeys physical, mechanical rules? Or does matter simply move intelligently and you are simply trying to explain its movements with made-up mythologies?

@Colin knew what @Prabhaker said and this is why he disagreed. Isn't that the funniest thing in the world?

@astrokeen I wrote about them here: If you have any questions - ask them there.

Cynicism in the modern sense is a self-referential expression of the absurd. You point out the absurd in others and by doing so you notice the absurdity in yourself. Absurd is rejected by the modern rationalists. This is why cynicism is usually bitter, or perceived by bitter by others. The absurd is a necessary occurrence in the rational world so that humans can keep being human. The absurd has to be cherished alongside rationalism. This is the path that changes irony into sincirety in cynicism. No definition of humans will ever be complete. Even the definition that states that humans are undefinable.

Spirituality is a human game like any other. You can have a perfectly meaningful life as a grocery store clerk, or a lawyer. It is our curious assumption that society is broken that leads us into spititual life because it is somehow pure. Spirituality is pure because it is empty. It has no substance to be corrupted. You live by not-living. You sit and call it meditation. Meditation is just a name that is being marketed as a practice. So is the whole of spirituality. If you cannot see through it, you may use it as a means to strengthen the sense of superiority that had led you to it in the first place. Emptiness of spirituality has advantages, like any other lifestyle. You can stand beside society and see through it. There is no value in that as long as you do not give your insights back to it. You are a part of it by parting from it. You are a singularity. A society within itself. You cannot comment constructively unless you stop being ironic. Inrony is insencire. It has no redeeming quality that gives back to society. This is how alienation is born and perpetuated. In order to see through others, you first need to see through yourelf.

Life is not about you. Did anybody ask you whether you would like to live? No. You were born into this place without any say in the matter. Don't expect life to give you directions on your limitations.

Please stop doing this to yourself. You have to trust him. Trust is given, not earned. Please stop going through his phone. Never stay with someone because he said he will change. You have to change yourself to stay with him. Become whatever you need to be in order to stay. Even if that means to become a monster. Strength is scary. We sometimes prefer to take punishment so that we don't admit that we're strong. It takes enormous strength to keep calling yourself weak every day. To endure your own name-calling and humiliation. You are not stupid and weak. You're afraid. Fear announces danger. You fear rightly. Fear is a plea for strength. Stay and become strong. It is sometimes easier to stay than to leave. You can be strong by leaving as well. It's up to you. You are free. You are free to stay and you are free to leave. If you need to talk, we're here for you, friend.

You are what you see if you don't see what you are. If the world always seem broken, be sure to check your glasses for cracks.

Wherever you go, you go with you. There is no disappearing from yourself.

@astrokeen Let me repeat myself, as this is crucial from my perspective: After you've experienced truth - there is no running away from it. You may not be ready for it and play hide and seek, but it will find you eventually. Any meaning you construct will not last. The more meaning you accumulate, the more painful it will get. All further awakenings will be easier. They were for me. Deal with the truth.

The awfulness and despair of the experience you have is your interpretation of it. It is a shadow that will hunt you unless you face it. The despair is a call for mourning. Mourn, so it will turn to appreciation. You will eventually reinterpret it in a different way. This is the miracle of the inherent meaninglessness.

You're welcome, friend.

Noticed how your life was probably constructed around trying to impress people? Funny, huh? Think of it like this: you have died. You have no life. Whatever you had is gone and you laugh at yourself for being silly. If a doctor told you a month ago that you have one month to live - you would give everything for another day of whatever this is. Now you have that one more day to live. Nobody promises you tomorrow. Everything you do is meaningless. Wanting to do anything is meaningless. Your desires are meaningless. Your fears are meaningless. Your ambitions are meaningless. What do you do? Nothing. You never did anything. You were being ignorant of whatever you thought you were doing. Now you know and there is nothing to be done with this knowledge. This is total, complete, stillness. Resisting day-to-day life is meaningless. So is living it. Just sit and observe this miracle while it lasts. It is perfect. Other people are not in despair. You are mourning over your lost life, that's all. You do not mourn to re-live what had been lost. You do it to realize that what's left is also open for being lost. Mourning is the shadow of appreciation. Mourn! Appreciate! When you were being ignorant of your meaninglessness, you did not despair. Their ignorance is bliss. They chase their meaning. We sit in meaninglessness. We're not that different in our ignorance.

Your description of reality seems pretty accurate to me, even though I haven't done any psychedelics (yet). It is a positive experience to me. There is solace to be found in meaninglessness. True meaninglessness is total freedom. I've been through two experiences similar to dark night of the soul. The first confrontation with meaninglessness sprang me right back into building meaning for myself. The second came into being when the self-built meaning showed itself to be meaningless after all. I came to stillness when meaninglessness itself became meaningless. You are a boat that floats on the river of meaning. Dark night of the soul is when you enter the ocean. There is nowhere to go, but you don't have to. Everywhere is the same. Even storms are still. There is no meaning in having meaning.