tsuki

Nope. Consider monks that starve in caves. Extreme psychological stress, social isolation and starvation. Of course, neither does starvation help in consciousness work.

No. Choice of food allows to express values of a different scope of a Self, and in doing so - lessen the relative suffering of the individual. Still, nothing to do with consciousness - purely survival business.

Eating has nothing to do with consciousness. It is purely survival business that serves to sustain the body, modify the psychological state, or maintain social interactions.

Very enlightening description of various modes of identity building. As an authentic identity builder, I have to disagree that authenticity is about being original. I have my own view on this matter.

I kept contemplating the fact that I only perceive reality through my own eyes, and I realized that knowledge, perception and emotions are constructed purely for the sake of self-survival as a body. This is why "I" don't perceive anything through the eyes of others. There is also nothing specific about being this particular body, it is just that knowledge is local to it, and is essential to its survival. I am no less everybody else despite the fact that I don't know what they do. Knowledge is entirely relative. When I contemplated what else I can survive as, I pondered the possibility of surviving as humanity, or as life itself and I would have to find it in my direct experience. For the time being, survival as humanity is somehow centered around language. I will keep hammering at it. Also, Gurdjieffian idea of Biospheric symbiosis came up. I seem to be conscious of the origins of this knowledge, as complete understanding of the Self. Enneagram is truly a magnificent tool. I wonder whose survival it facilitates. I-Ching is also a very potent tool for expanding my identification as a Self. I always had issues with the belief systems it passed on, but I can now see why they were necessary. Very, very clever.

With regards to my contemplation of change, I became conscious that change is an illusion. Change is when something is, and isn't itself. Since existence is an appearance, so is change. This is obvious when one is conscious that the present moment is not "something". For the past few days, I was bugged by the question of perspective: "How is it possible that I perceive reality through my eyes, and not through eyes of anybody else?". This question was especially disturbing since I am conscious that my existence is an appearance. After I rejected solipsistic thoughts about me being God and creating everyone else, the mind gave in and I considered that I do not, in fact, perceive anything at all. Neither does anybody else. I thought that whatever is in front of my head, is less nothing than what is in the back of my head. It isn't. It is the same nothing that I don't perceive through your eyes. Also, I understood that is this forum is not a platform for learning, but a social media for sages. @Leo Gura is an influencer.

Yes, I've seen it on multiple occasions.

Death understood as the end of being is a myopic delusion. Being is, and is nothing. This is impossible to understand, so don't even try. Whatever you believe death to be, drop it, and look for yourself in your direct experience. The present moment does not represent anything. Neither does death. Value is only relative to survival, so of course "death" is lower in value than living in the present moment. The "beauty" and "love" in the present moment is a relative expression of a confused mind with no point of reference (knowledge).

Value to whom, exactly? The question of value is purely intellectual, it has no relation to God.

You cannot meet a need for intimacy on your own. That is the point of intimate relationships . The truth is that relationships are not simple. They are multi-faceted and it may be entirely possible that there are other factors that make you stay with this man even if he does not meet your needs for intimacy. Our therapist taught us that commitment is the single most important factor in keeping the relationship together - even if there is no intimacy, or passion. If you are committed to him, and he is committed to you, then you both will do your best to give each other as much as you possibly can. But a person that fits 100% with you does not exist. There will be compromises, strife, suffering and growth. And there will also be love, intimacy, passion and all the other good things. So in the end, the first question is whether you want to be with this man, or not by weighing the WHOLE relationship with him. The second question is whether he reciprocates this decision. Then, you live with understanding that everything that comes after is because you chose it. indeed!

This is what I meant by being neglected. Not having real, inspired connection, passion, openness, hope, dreams, etc. This is what I call passion - a longing for closeness and intimacy. This is opposite to a mechanic, generic, chatting, checking up on, etc. This is a good call I think. It's much better to discuss such matters in person. Maybe a part of all of this is that you miss him? But I think that it is important to let him address what you want openly. Not by manipulating him into introspection and covering it up with an excuse that it's for his own good, because he's a workaholic that avoids intimacy. Yes, the wording may not have been too helpful. I hope that you will be able to find a way to express your emotions honestly, in a way that does not make him feel defensive. Isn't it what you are afraid of, when you talk to him? Expressing what you need? Being supportive means that you give space for your husband to do him, and give him whatever he needs in the pursuit of that. That being said, you are a human being, and real support starts with acknowledging the extent of your own boundaries, and what you can, and cannot do. This is the part about self-interest. Your self-interest limits the extent of support you can give to others. If you overreach (like you are right now), then you have to take a step back and take care of your own needs. Unconditional support is not possible. In this particular situation it would mean, that you would allow your husband to work as much as he likes and helping him to work even more if that's what he needs. But you can't do that because you want to be intimate with him. So you take a step back and tell it to him. But this is a conflict of interest, and this is why you cannot "fix" him. You are not doing this for him, you are doing this for yourself. And that is not a moral judgement. You have every right to take care of your needs. It does not make you a bad person. It makes you a person, as opposed to a god.

Bought her flowers yesterday, out of the blue. I followed exactly, toe-to-toe, what she's been telling me over the years. She likes bright colors, loves Eustoma and gilly flowers. Hates oxeye daisies and flowers wrapped in paper soluble in water. She will not tell you this all at once, but muster these things out of the blue on random occasions. It is your job to listen and take note. Result? She said that these are the best flowers she has ever got and was very surprised. I can see her walking by them and spontaneously looking at them with a smile. I have no idea how will I top this, but my pen and paper is ready.

I'm guessing not as high as we tend to imagine, as he has repeatedly stated on the forum that he is primarily concerned with understanding, and not with embodiment.

@Vzdoh I would suggest to flip this thinking around and focus on yourself instead of thinking about making "his" situation better. From what you wrote: This is not being supportive. You are trying to illicit some effect, like making him look inwards. Why? This is correct, your emotions and self-interest are at stake. Focus on your self-interest and address it openly. To me, it seems like you feel neglected in a relationship. That he prioritizes his work over you and is not giving you the effort that would satisfy you. When did he do something romantic for you? Maybe you feel overwhelmed by the chores and want some fresh air? If that is the case, then try telling him openly and honestly about how you feel and let him ponder this. I don't know the state of your relationship. If he is listens to your difficulties, then allow him some time to ponder and address it. But, if he shrugs it off, chooses his work over you, than that is an answer in of itself and you should ponder that.

@Striving for more I have said this and will hammer this point again. If you are preoccupied with scoring with a generalized, abstract, chick, then you have to be a generalized, abstract, chad. You are not an abstraction. You are a concrete person and you will not score with an abstract chick. Find a woman that suits you, that fits with your life. You find her first by knowing yourself, and what you need, and trying over and over again. The only way it will work is when you find a woman that needs someone like you. Not like chad. When I was preoccupied with thinking in terms of scoring, I did not want to be in a relationship. I was simply thinking that having more sex will make me a better man. This is thinking in terms of abstractions, not genuine self-knowledge that can create lasting fulfillment.

Sorry, just found the question. Had to do some breathing to un-confuse myself ? Are you asking about generalities? Or you, particularly? Which "one"? What "life"? For a householder, no. It is not possible if laser focus on emptiness is your goal.

I would really like to say something helpful, but I am not sure what the question is. I'm here to offer my presence and sympathy to your efforts. Breath is a great medication for confusion though.

Yep, and this difference is doing the actual work.

Because growth requires exploration of areas that we do not naturally gravitate towards. It's all Love in the end, but saying it outright gives the wrong impression that it is, in any way, tied with morality and meekness.

That belief is rooted in your intellectual preoccupation. Stop prioritizing abstractions over yourself. There is no difference between you and the experiences you had. "You" could not have had any OTHER experiences. It would not have been "you".

No inner work will ever give you freedom as understood by having happy thoughts, all day every day. Inner work will only ever give you responsibility, as in, an inner space in which experience occurs. Indeed, shadow work will make you feel like an 8 year old, because, in fact, that 8 year old still lives in your psyche. The psyche does not grow in a way that is similar to the body, by gradually transforming into something different, bigger. It grows by creating layers, like an onion, with experience. Shadow work will let you see clearly, the layers that are very old and very powerful. This 8 year old is interconnected with every other layer, and if it feels threatened, it will throw a tantrum. Because you worked to uncover it, you have the opportunity to take ownership of it, and protect it deliberately by creating boundaries in your life. Only conscious boundary creation will give you a way to create a life that is harmonious with you. It will not be airy-fairy-spiritual. It will be brutal, but now you know that this inner child is there and why it feels so hurt.

Came to share recent events in my life with regards to enlightenment and other personal matters. Took a week off work and did some contemplation. I was writing an essay on limitation and contemplating what it is in my direct experience. This has led me to a question "do things that cannot be experienced, exist?" which obliterated me. I made this thread to gain some insight into the matter and all the big boys came to help. I understood that I lost ground in my contemplation and started asking questions about things I have not experience of. In the process of tackling this question, I became conscious of the nature of abstraction and became acutely aware of how it dominates my experience. I understood experientially that every existence is unique and abstractions are a mode of thinking that is ultimately unsatisfying. After some more contemplation, I started reading "the book of not knowing" with hope to gain more insight into limitation. I read it once in the past and gained insight that I am the absolute truth from the first few chapters of the book that outlined the principles of contemplation. With every book, I start by glancing over the index and seeing which topics resonate with me. For the longest time I thought that this particular book is ought to be read from back to back. I mustered the courage and went straight to the last chapter about the true nature of existence because it sparked the connection with the relativity and limitation. With Peter's written guidance, I started contemplating what difference is, and I realized that it is not a thing and it does not exist. Yet, at the same time, I became aware that difference gives existence to "things". I became conscious that the true nature of existence is emptiness. I also became aware that it is impossible to understand it and it makes no sense whatsoever. Whoever claims to know infinity is full of shit. The intellect is entirely relative and it cannot grasp Nothing. Only not-knowing can bring about consciousness of nothingness. I was experiencing a lot of fibro-related pain at the time and I used this opportunity to contemplate what pain is. I quickly became aware that pain is an emotion and that true nature of emotion is survival and that survival is love, which is absolute. Again, only genuine, shocking, not-knowing can bring about this realization. I am Love, I am Existence, I am Nothing, I am Absolute. There is no such thing as a mind. As of yet, I was not able to properly shock myself into seeing the true nature of time. Today, in a dream, I understood that I have a belief that the present moment is beyond and around reality and contains it like a box. I know intellectually that it is a belief, but I am not currently able to access genuine not-knowing in this matter. On a more personal ground, my relationship with my sister rekindled after we spoke about numerology. I offered to show her more about it thanks to the books that were suggested to me by my friend @Zigzag Idiot. For the past two weeks, we've been meeting and I started teaching her I-Ching and showing how to consult the Sage. I am very happy that we are able to connect again and I will not let the ego appropriate this Cosmic Gift.

We're all strangers on the internet, so it's not the same thing.

Also, you don't want a friend. You want a therapist. There is no road from zero rapport to people giving you effort and listening to your pain to help you. Even people that you've been with for years are usually afraid of doing that. Just find a therapist and pay him to do it. It's like a professional friend that will actually support you and mirror your shadows to you consciously.