KMB4222

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I don't often skip parts of books to come back to at a later time. I usually settle for skimming certain sections if they don't seem to be interesting or helpful. Of course, the downside to this is that I might miss something quite valuable, or there might be something very insightful that doesn't click with me until later on. I suppose the best way to approach reading (especially if it's for personal development) is holistically, if I'm using that term correctly. Consider that reading the book from cover to cover will provide one kind of understanding of the material, and also that reading a bit here and there can be also be helpful. If the book is more instructional, it might be more beneficial to go through the lists of exercises discussed one or two at a time and see what seems to work for you, or what you can apply and benefit from. If the book is discussing a smaller number of topics, then it might be more beneficial to read the chapters in order, because that's how the author and/or editor put it together, and the intent might have been to lead you toward a greater understanding that way. I would also consider journalling to be part of holistic approach to reading. Books can be read for many reasons and in many degrees of intent. If the reading is done for personal development, then there will probably be some way to journal about what you have read, or some of the questions the book poses. For example, I recently read "Don't Polish Your Ignorance...It May Shine". While the book was incredibly insightful just on its own, I was able to come up with a long list of questions that I could work through myself via journalling. In a way, this solidified and personalized the reading experience and the value of the book. Another helpful tip is to allow yourself to reading a book multiple times. I used to get stuck on reading a book just to cross it off my reading list, but then I would inevitably be drawn back to reading it again because I had found it helpful. My first reading provided me with some level of understanding and insight the first time, and the second time I read it I was able to gain something else as well. Hope this helps in some way. -KMB

Wondering if anyone has insight as to how I can approach this situation next time: I was strong-determination sitting yesterday, and after approx. 20-25 minutes my mind became very quiet, my breathing became shallow and irregular, and my heart felt like it was beating faster, and my mind became more focused. It felt as if I was on the verge of having a breakthrough, but I didn't know what it could be. Thoughts began to creep up. Some of the thoughts were "What is happening?" "Don't be afraid." "Am I about to become enlightened?" I kept trying to push the thoughts aside, but also allowing the thoughts to occur. I began remembering meditation tips I had read: "Allow everything, even these thoughts." "Stay detached, but present." It felt as if I was approaching something, maybe a cloud of awareness, and I strongly felt that a breakthrough of some kind was very possible. But the more thoughts began to creep up, the more the experience began to drop away. I began to recede from the possibility of the breakthrough, and my attention became more inclusive of my surroundings (the room I was sitting in). I was left feeling as if I was close (or potentially close) to have a major breakthrough, but also confused, maybe even saddened. So I guess my confusion is: Why was I not able to continue into the breakthrough experience? What kept me from fully letting go into it? Was I scared? Was it my thoughts that pulled me away? What can I do differently next time that might allow for the breakthrough to actually occur (assuming that's actually what was happening)? thank you for your time, KMB

Thank you for the reply. Much appreciated.

Well, I'm not there yet, but what I have found most helpful along the way is trying to find commonality between yourself and other people. Look for the ways in which you behave the same, even if you are doing something different. For example, I sometimes think that playing around on your phone is a waste of time and I look at other people like they are wasting their time when I see them playing games on their phones. Even though I don't play mobile games, I am still doing what they are doing - distracting myself. I just do it in different ways. I find it helpful to dig deeper into what it is I am first noticing about peoples' behaviour, then identify how I do the same thing, albeit even in a different form. Also helpful are trying to be understanding and forgiving of others, including yourself. Learning about human psychology and behaviour can come in handy here, because it will help you understand why we do what we do sometimes. The ego/mind always wants to point the finger and externalize the problem. But there might not even be a problem at all. We're all in the same ship here. Another thing to look into might be Loving-Kindness meditation. In brief, it involves developing a sense of love for yourself, others, and eventually the entire universe.

I was meditating the other day (sitting with eyes open), and after about 20 minutes I asked myself "what am I I?" Within a few moments, I realized that everything I knew about my personality was based on ideas, assumptions, conditioning, thoughts, reactionary behaviours, etc. It was a very emotional moment for me. So now my question is: How do I know this experience was real? How do I know that it wasn't just my mind/ego making me believe in the experience? I've been reading a book that talks about how we really don't know who we are. How do I know that I actually had this realization, rather than just taking on what I have been reading because my ego knows I'm seeking? I've heard that it's best to let these experiences speak for themselves, and not analyze them too much, because that's just the mind trying to figure it out. Thank you, KMB