WaveInTheOcean

If you as a person ( ' I ' ) is an illusion, as you have found out, how does this change the way you will live your live, behave, etc?

Well, I agree, sex is important for deep emotional connection. Obviously, if you are a very sexual creature, an ideal partner would also have a high sex drive, right? "but I wonder if this is a productive purge (getting it all out and into the light to be transmuted) or if it's a sign of incompatibility." Couldn't it be both? I'd say, emotional pain could almost always be viewed as a kind of productive purge, if you are conscious about it. Many people fall in love, have a relationship for some time, where both -- or at least one -- grow as humans, and then they find out they are incompatible and break up. Then usually, if one of them had not grown much during the relationship, he/she will after the break-up. "Since I'm not completely enlightened" -- why aren't you? Be careful of believing your own narrative too much, ehe...:> What would it take for you to become completely enlightened? And who isn't enlightened? :> Being desperate for attention is pretty human I'd say. Nothing wrong about that, especially not when paired with consciousness/contemplation/inquiry as you do. Perhaps, the more rules you set up about "what is not enlightened" the further away you get from that you seek. Enlightenment isn't about behaving in a special way, or being nice, or being a good person. The road of enlightenment is a quest for honesty: unravling the mind and its ego-structures, accepting what is. https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-descriptions - which type on the enneagram is your core type? :>

"very long time", yeah sure. I've been through hell myself. I personally, egoistically doubt anyone can really awaken without going through hell first, but hey, maybe I'm wrong..., after all, there is no one here, ehe <3

inauthentic - authentic is a human dualistic notion. However, it's a pretty useful notion in terms of enlightenment/awakening. If you want to awaken to the truth of who you are, you have to have (in my selfish limited view) authenticity as one of your top priorities, otherwise you ain't gonna get that c00kie ;-) Look around in the world. How many people have authenticity/truth as a top priority? Almost none. People are biased as fuck and only sees things that fit into their world-view. Survival-programming makes sure of that.

no difference at all. What story do you want to believe in? I'd choose the story that maximizes your joy, happiness and outlook on your life. I do that myself, everything else seems rather silly. I could tell you there is direct experience/actuality behind it, but isn't that the case for all stories, all myths, including atheism? And what difference does it make to you if I say I'm following a belief system/3rd-part story or if there actually is actuality behind it? To you, it would still be hearsay in either case. Of course, to find out what is Absolutely True, you have to go beyond words, beyond beliefs. What is Absolutely True can't be explained with words, so of course I'm just having fun here, creating my own narrative, my own story. But of course there is actuality behind it. How could there not be? :> <3 All stories are stories. Everything that can be said with words is a story. The Absolute Truth of God/Nothingness/Love/Consciousness shows you that you are that itself: God, Nothing, Everything, Infinite Love/Consciousness. Thus you are in perfect control to create ANY story you want. No story is anymore true than any other story. Of course, some stories are more useful than other for particular things. Atheism/science is very bad at creating happiness, but is good at creating technology (which can help makes os happier in indirect ways). Religious stories are good at making us feel happy, but pretty bad at creating computers or medicine. Of course, the only story what will you make permanently infinitely happy is not a story, but the truth, which can't be put into words. It's right there in front of our eyes. God, Nothingness, Awareness whatever you wanna call the Absolute/Divine.

oh, i've had spiritual ermergencies. They seem bad on the outside, but are good on the inside. Takes consciousness to see it, which often comes with time.

everything is direct experience if you have never seen the color blue , and I tell you the sky is blue and beautiful, you can believe me "the sky is blue and beautiful", but you haven't directly experienced the sky, right? And you don't know what blue is. I can tell you much physical stuff about the blue colour, like how the eye and brain work works and the wavelength and frequency of the colour blue, etc, but that's not gonna make you see it, is it? What is gonna make you see it? You going out and watching it:D Now, you have directly experienced it. Now, can you trust your direct experience? Is there really a blue material sky out there you can go visit and touch? naaaah, we now know the blue sky is just an illusion because the molecules of the upper atmosphere scatter the blue frequencies the most, making an illusion of an apparant blue thing up there. But there is no sky, just blue light:> Why is the sky blue? Cos blue frequencies are scattered the most. But why is those frequencies perceived as the subjective experience of seeing blue? Well, that's God's programming, that's direct consciousness, that's how it is. That's infinity, mystery, right there. Anyway, the point is not to *trust* direct experience per se, but to understand that what really matters is direct experience, and not rumors/belief or hersay. How you interpret your direct experiences, what story you want to build out of them: well that's up to you.

Alan Watts understood it/this is all a game. There are infinite games you can play, but to be serious and say "I am not playing. Existence is fucking serious man, and here is my book on how to live" is basically to be as far away from God as you can be. Alan Watts said that even though it's a big game of God; you can still play it sincerely, just as you still play your favorite board game sincerly, even though you know it's just a game:-) Alan Watts will personally always be my favorite philosopher/spiritual guide. What his words has done to my life is indescribable.

Neil is right in the sense that consciousness isn't a thing that can be found or be explained. There is no consciousness to figure out. Consciousness is the very substance of existence. Consciousness is what is. Everything is consciousness. Have anyone ever experienced something that was not appearing in consciousness? No - lol. Neil is wrong in the way he *denies* consciousness, though. Oh it's fun. The Bill Nye guy is the most religious of them all, though. Listen to his religious view of how a copy of his brain would not contain his memories, basically contradicting himself, it's hilarious:

solid post, thank you check out enneagram

No creature lives eternally, so don't worry bout that. God's highest priority is maximizing Love, so of course he wouldn't let himself experience eternal hell without any salvation. Luckily, death is always the greatest of all salvations. The salvation of death(merging with himself/oneness) feels greater for God the more pain he endured beforehand, so there's always love-logic behind everything that happens. Everything that happens -- even though there can happen infinite things, cos yes, God is infinite -- is designed for maximizing Love. Now, what is Love? It's the basic substance of existence. Everything is in fact made out of Love. It's equal to consciousness. You can feel love in many ways of course. Now, if love is the basic substance of existence, if Love = God = Reality , why does God not just bathe in his own infinite pool of Love/Oneness forever? Well, I did, then I got tired of it, wanted some more spice, wanted to create a dangerous game, where it feels like I'm just a 'poor-little-me' stuck in a cruel world, forgetting myself, running around hoping to find answers, happiness, creating technology, creating things, imagination. All of existence is a trade-off for God between infinite imagination (play) and Oneness/Infinite Love. He wants both. He wants it to be dangerous and fucked up and messed up, only to feel even more Infinite Love when he finally goes back to himself and sees it was just his own game of pretending to be a human:D <3

they are pretty much the same psychedelics has a high success rate of producing peak experiences, but they also fail for many too. of course you can also get peak experiences without psychedelics.

of course we are all using psychedelics differently. we are all unique and different (as humans) due to genetics and upbringing. In regards to awakening and enlightenment there is no clear-cut default way for anyone. we all have to walk the path ourselves in our own unique way. Of course God has laid out some breadcumbs, such as pychedelics and the art of meditation, but it's still unique for everyone.

Would there be any room for so-called 'pleasant experiences' if there was no room for so-called 'unpleasant experiences? Unpleasant - pleasant: it's a dualistic construction of your selfish survivalistic mind. Of course, for 'a separate self' that HAS to survive, it is necessary to differentiate between pleasant and unpleasant experiences. What would a world look like without any personal self-agenda (conscious or unconscious)? Would there be any judgments left about the world anymore? Would there be any resistance left to reality? How could one not smile when one sees that there is absolutely nothing going on but Love's Infinite Play of Nothing? Go beyond your mind. When the illusion of the separate self has been fully seen-through -- when the ego has fully surrendered to Oneness -- it doesn't make sense anymore to talk about pleasant and unpleasant parts of reality. Existence, Reality is seen for what it is: one empty infinite eternal perfect experience/happening/dream unfolding out of itself out of play/love ... That's what it is ... this <3

You treat yourself badly. Your unconsciously don't think you deserve love, so if someone actually came and loved you unconditionally and treated you with respect, your ego wouldn't buy it, and you will push them away. Practice self love man❤️??

"It's especially weird because someone mentioned that there could be something in my past that pushes me towards him... but I am clueless as to what that could be. " how is your relationship to your father? has your father always been a straight up nice guy or does he have some dark sides/bad tendencies towards your mother (i'd guess they have broken up, but correct me if im wrong)

you let him back in because you hate yourself -- i.e. you dont love yourself very much -- and have close to zero self worth. I dont even understand why you are making this post. Cut him fucking out of your life and start treating yourself like you'd treat your best friend! love you <3

there are no parts. Or there is, of course, if you imagine there is, e.g. "this is a tree, this is a chair". But beyond imagination, there is raw reality which is always whole and one and absolutely empty. This is pure being, yes, and this pure being is so empty of substance that it can only become full of deep peace, inner joy and uncondtional love.

lol you can react and still be grounded and not-attached. When you are very wise, you understand that the other part sometimes needs a proper reaction=)

Nirvana isn't something to attain. There is no one to attain it. You are Nirvana itself. Nirvana is always the case. The question is if you are willing to see it or not. Most aren't, since this "seeing" presupposes the death of (complete letting go of) the individual separate self, which most aren't willing to let go of, since they identify so much with it (their personhood ... oh this sweet, sweet, bittersweet illusion <3). Give up. Surrender. Let go. <3

The question you should be asking yourself is this: do you care about yourself? And what do you mean by 'myself' ? Contemplate.

It's all imagination/dream/concept/ideas .... BUT: there are different layers/levels to this infinite dream of God/Love/Nothingness. The body, as well as all other apparant "material" forms is one layer of concept. Above this is apparant ego/person/separate self; it is even more abstract. Above this is family, community, society, global world, etc. Death *as a SUBJECIVE experience* is the shedding of all that isn't real. If your buddy dies, then this it is just you projecting out onto 'this world' that now some part of it has "died" , (your friend). This is just your own personal (selfish) interpretation of what is happening. You could as well say that your buddy got alive. It's a matter of perspective, narrative... what story do YOU want to create/hear? :-) You could as well just say that nothing is happening. It's just experience unfolding in infinity out of itself. This is nothingness. This is God. Love. The body is much more 'real' (but still unreal, still an imaginary distinction of infinity) than the ego. At least you can fucking see the body. The separate self, aka ego, is nowhere to be found:-) No ego disappear, cos there wasn't even an ego in the first place. All that disappear (during death) is the illusion of the ego ... the illusion of the separate self.

Not if combined with psychedelics:-) Spiritual practice (contemplation, retreats, meditation, self-inquiry, reading, watching videos, etc.) go hand-in-hand with pychedelics. They amplify each other.

You decide ???