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I rest my case! I see what you are telling me! Basically a rant against myself!

Very true, that mindset of "‘it’s out to get me if I become enlightened’ road can't be a good one for anyone or any part. But there is also a saying that says "You must know the rules before you can break them" So, I guess it can be good to understand how society(which is an illusion) works, in order to stay detached from it in a some way.

Here's the longer quote from Osho btw, I just quoted the first sentence in OP. “No society wants you to become wise: it is against the investment of all societies. If people are wise they cannot be exploited. If they are intelligent they cannot be subjugated, they cannot be forced in a mechanical life, to live like robots. They will assert their individuality. They will have the fragrance of rebellion around them. They will like to live in freedom. Freedom comes with wisdom, intrinsically. They are inseparable, and no society wants people to be free. The communist society, the fascist society, the capitalist society, the Hindu, the Mohammedan, the Christian — no society — would like people to use their own intelligence because the moment they start using their intelligence they become dangerous — dangerous to the establishment, dangerous to the people who are in power, dangerous to the ‘haves’; dangerous to all kinds of oppression, exploitation, suppression; dangerous to the churches, dangerous to the states, dangerous to the nations. In fact, a wise man is afire, alive, aflame. But he cannot sell his life, he cannot serve them. He would like rather to die than to be enslaved.” ~Osho

You are afraid to face truth! And it's a legit fear! This is why.. ..If you trace your way back to God/nothingness, you will realise how profound and perfect everything is. Everything is complete. There is just an overflow of love, bliss, love, peace and beauty. There is nothing to do and nothing to become. There is no goal what so ever, you already are the goal. Now, because of this overflow of positive emotions, God transcend itself so speak and arise if a form of a body-mind. A mind is a derivative of God one can say. The best thing a mind can do is to let it sink back and dissolve itself into to pure awareness/God again. Which is what happened when the mind is stripped of its limitations. Awareness plus a certain set of limitations makes up your mind, there is literary NOTHING more to it. Your mind has many hopes though, many things it will accomplish, you have 20+ years of indoctrination into that mind of yours. Of course, that will be frightened to realise that the only thing worth doing is to dissolve itself back to nothingness again. Life(ego) is great, but even greater, MUCH greater is no life at all. No one is dying here, only the wrong idea that the the mind of yours is something other then limitations of what you really are. Since awareness is infinite, that's what we really are. It can limiting itself to "your" particular mind or "my" particular mind. Your fear is the fear from "your" ego, which is nothing but an imaginary unit.

This is how I see it.. Maya Everything in reality and in the world exist, everything we experience, everything that we perceive through perception is made of something. In that sense it's not illusions. Every experience must be made out of something, a substance if you like. But we never perceive reality as it really is, we have a blind spot that let us see the world/reality from a dualistic perspective. And from that personal dualistic perspective it's fair to say that Everything is an illusion. But every experience, even illusions must be made of something(a substance), in that sense the world is not an illusion. Something is. We never perceive it as it is though, and this is precisely what maya refers to. Brahman is to me the shared infinite consciousness that everything arise from. Every object, every human/animal/mineral arise from this infinite awareness that is everything and nothing at the same time, but this infinite everything/nothing is self aware and without any objective qualities! Atman refers to the infinite awareness in a certain individual. You can argue that Atman is personal, but when you discover Atman fully in yourself you discover that you found Brahman. There is no difference what so ever. Please respond to me if I got it right! Thanks!

In Sweden we have a comedian that truly is a genius, too me, he might even be the most insightful man that ever lived! Anyway, he is very interested in spiritual matters as well, and he know that we(the one) will never die. This is from a comic drama serie that run over 24 episodes and was aired on Swedish television between 1 dec to 24 dec back in 1996. Anyway, one of the characters in this serie had a mission - "To bring God into the mainstream media world" :'-) The comedians name is Peter and he know that God can never appear in mainstream culture because it's govern by mind. Nevertheless he made a comedy show about it and one of his characters say things like "With humor, love, fantasy, knowledge and beauty - we will force God into the media world, that is our mission" Lol, that's fantastic, isn't it? He gatherer a group of people in this episode and explain their important mission. Comic gold! The relevant discussion here is the syntax error in reality, By syntax error I mean this.. ..Reality will always consists of two forces so to speak, one of them is the force of "God "(metaphor for love, compassion, beauty, happiness peace, non duality etc).. ...and the other one is the force of "mind" (metaphor for ego, power, political issues, media business, duality etc) Reality will always consists of these two forces, even though the proportion between them will probably differ slightly over time. If you consider these two forces as liquids (metaphorically speaking), the liquid of "Mind" will always be on top if you mix them together. If the force of God aim to be on top it would no longer be the force of God, but the force of Mind. Thus, even though the force of God is genius and brilliant, the mediocre force of Mind will always be "superior" because of its nature. By superior I refer to the force that dominate mainstream culture with its media for example. Anyway, here's the great swedish comedian in full action doing one of his characters(the one who's mission is to force God into the media world) You will laugh your ass of. This is so surreal and strange in a good way! The part I speak about is between 1.00 - 2.50 in the clip. (It's in English btw)

I have always been very spiritual without even knowing about spiritual communities, enlightenment, gurus and such. I have no conceptual knowledge. But I always felt life is mysterious and magical. I often feel existential bliss. I feel deep connection with existential matters beyond what words describe. However, words and conceptual knowledge doesn't hurt. And now as a father I like to consume some teaching, since I don't want them to be bohemians yet not too adopted to mainstream society with all its toxic priorities and conventional way of living. But I find it hard to find a spiritual teacher that has children and therefore firsthand experience of upbringing. Leo has told us he has no children(yet) and Osho, Sadhguru, Tolle, Adyashanti and Mooji... none of them have have their own families, right ? Is there any teacher/guru that is a father? Might be a stupid question, but I am novice and all of this talk about "infinity" and "pure consciousness" doesn't appeal to me. Maybe later if I continue with teachings. As for now, I would love some pragmatic teachings for helping me out family wise. Thanks!

Thank you Vytas! I'll look into it when I have 1.5 hours over!

Thank you! I didn't know about Sadhguru. Just saw a you tube episode with Peter, really like him. You can say many bad things about internet, but you can indeed find some profound wisdom there as well. Thanks again!

First of all, planning is a good thing, we all agree on that I believe! Without it - No Leo youtube episodes every Sunday morning! However, if you aim for a fully enlightened consciousness, what will that do with your planning abilities? After all, enlightenment is about the NOW, it's about peace and fully accept what is. Love, bliss and beauty! Pure Enlightenment is a total absence of any manipulation, you are guided by intuition, not by your mind. So, is there anything like a "good" manipulation? Planning as well as other intellectual activities are manipulations(Even if it has a good purpose). And also, what about "becoming". Life purpose is about "becoming something". Becoming also involve manipulation, at least manipulation of yourself. There seem to be a conflict here?

True! It's blissful and you wish all people find it in themselves!

Most people take better care of themselves after enlightenment. That's paradoxical, but think about it. When it is obvious that there are a biological system, a body-mind that you are not, but that have desires, hopes nevertheless. Would you like to starve that body? It's one thing to handle your own suffering(starving for example), but it harder to see "others" suffer, specially if you don't have an ego. If anything, "you" will take better care of "your" body and treat it with respect and dignity and feed it with nutritious food and water. Just my two cents..

@Maxi "What thoughts can I trust?" That very question is a thought, right? You have no choice to trust or don't trust a thought! Thats why we like to think less and go more with intuition. If you doubt a thought , that very doubt is a new thought, and if you doubt the doubt, that's yet another thought. The only thing that is companied with a thought is the pure knowing of it(the fluid in which it arise), nothing else. The word "pure" doesn't refer to moral, but to the fact that the "knowing" is "pure" (empty) from any content, like contents from other thoughts. So there's never judging of thoughts, thats why we find a non stop thought stream draining of energy. Judgments are nothing but new thoughts. Some thoughts are better and more true then others, on a relative level that is. But no one is there to tell in the moment of an arising thought whether it is trustworthy or not. An even better question is "What feelings can I trust" Since realising of ones true nature is companied by feelings of peace, happiness, love and beauty. One can argue that those are precisely the feelings we should trust since it correspond to non-dual absolute truth. And thoughts that arise in that state of mood, might be more trustworthy. All of this are just thoughts, but hope it helps anyway!