billiesimon

Nice But what would happen should you discover a crazier deeper level of awakening years after releasing the course? I think this is quite possible, since you keep mentioning that awakening gets infinitely deeper and deeper.

Ok, I might have a flawed small sampling. But I do not have a narrative, this was not a redpill or other negative BS argument. I have just noticed that they tend to be impulsive with sex, it's not a sexist belief. I might be wrong in my sampling. I'm still pro-feminism though.

It might be dangerous, but from what I see going on in social circles, women tend to have huge amounts of casual sex. Way more than men. Yes, they also tend to look for someone stable, but before that they definitely engage in massive amounts of random and even dangerous sex. So, I don't agree at all. I think that the feminine benefits from casual sex because it's a way of maximizing her peak sexual age by having lots of sexual encounters. This is not judging, I'm very progressive minded. It's just something I observed. Yes, they risk more than men, yet they still act on the instincts, especially in the 18-25 age range they are very impulsive on sex (of course there are exceptions!).

What I don't understand is the relationship between high states of consciousness and suffering. In my experience, both sober and psychedelic, higher states deeply reduce suffering. The reason why this happens is because you stop interpreting pain as negative, and start to feel it as a neutral expression of being, just like sleepiness, excitement, an ithc on the skin etc.... I hope I'm getting the point across. I have experienced it at least 5-6 times, and it also makes sense using traditional reason: if you stop discriminating, even subconsciously, between all sensations, pain becomes non-suffering. The only point of suffering is the ego-agenda. It has no other purpose. So, what I'm asking is: shouldn't a DIRECT consciousness of God, in the present moment I mean, erase all survival agendas, thus erase suffering? I don't mean permanently, I mean as long as you remain in a deep state. Do you agree?

What happens in your experience with DMT? How is it different from 5-MeO for you?

Yes, it's the most random and casual type of test. Not really worth it.

I've finally tried the test. It's too simplistic and naive. Seems like a random magazine test.

No problem, I leave the debate because I was not looking for a debate I was just reinforcing your valid points with the deepest level, since it has happened in my direct experience. I literally mean that several glimpses of awakening have completely dissolved any form of sexism or bias in me about gender. So yes, it has had a huge practical impact on my life. I agree that nonduality is not for everyone on this planet. I was not arguing with you, just adding a valid and TRUTHFUL point that I have found very valuable. Truth is Truth. Even if it's not practical. Practicality is a byproduct of ego, it is not Truth. The truth is that women and men are just consciousness and they should be treated equally, so are poor and rich, western and non western. This truth is total and eternal, no amount of pragmatism will erase it, because pragmatism is in the Mind. I like your posts and support them Cheers

I sense that you're projecting or misunderstanding my words, which can happen sometimes. I agree with basically everything you have written in this thread. I'm much more progressive than you, I'm even a marxist and a radical egalitarian. You are probably projecting onto me the classical rational guy who wants to keep the status quo, the classical political centrist who says "women are ok, they are good, but stop talking about it bla bla" No, completely agree with all you've said on this topic, and to be honest there are way deeper dynamics than those. My point was another. I was just completely validating your analisys by going directly to the core of the problem. Feminism is mental gymnastics. Traditionalism, machism, patriarchy, is all mental gymnastics. If people sensed what I have sensed several times (which is the foolish illusion of sex, gender, equality etc) the world would be a society of all equals, on all levels. Not even economic differences. It's that radical. I completely agree that we need to discuss gender equality, I have done my fair share of propaganda for progress. I still do. But the Truth remains that there is no reason to treat humans as unequal The only reason slavery and exploitment happen is because they are asleep. I'm NOT justifying a world of inequality. I am JUST saying that this world ACTS unequal because it is deeply ignorant and asleep. That's it. I'm not doing any zen devilry.... that's your projection I'm basically just saying that women and men have gender issues only because they believe in that gender identity. "Women and men" creates the problem, you are trying to solve the UNSOLVABLE. Because it's rooted in ignorance. I'm being really really radical, to the point of sounding cultish. But you can experience it. I have experience my sex being nothing. I have become deeply conscious, several times, that my sex does not exist. Nor yours. If humanity is so deeply identified in men and women, there will ALWAYS be problems between them. Always. (but still, let's keep fighting for equality)

Well, yes, but this dynamic is essentially rooted in metaphysics. The ego is based on separation from other forms, and thus it seeks to find the higher ground, both physically and mentally. This is not just a male dynamic (of course men do it a lot) but also a female dynamic. Male-female is just ego. You are not female. I am not male. It's just identity. The ego feels inferior. Period. Female egos feel inferior. Male egos feel inferior. Neutral egos feel inferior. End of the story. (of course I'm a progressive, and pro equality, but equality is just a construct the ego. everything is ALREADY equal, women have always been equal to men, because woman is not a real thing, nor are men....) Sorry for the pedantic approach but I like to view this topic from the highest perspective

I finally did it, I finally had my first DMT experience! I've been waiting for this moment for two years, and finally found it. The experience was the exact opposite of what I expected. This trip was ALL about rooting, grounding, reconnecting with motivation for life, rekindling that passion for matter, for flesh and bones. I was expecting a very lofty and nondual trip, but DMT didn't give me what I wanted, it gave me what I NEEDED THE MOST. Grounding into my best possible life. I have tried several psychedelics, received huge benefits from them, also gone to therapy for two years and changed my psyche into a healthier and more balanced version, recovering almost entirely from depression and anxiety, but.... DMT has accomplished what no amount of therapy or LSD (or other psychs) could never accomplish: It gave me back my SPIRITUAL CONNECTION TO LIFE AND MATTER, a love for life I've never had in the past. Maybe the most incredible part is that the trip itself was not the peak of the experience. The peak was my walk through the riverside where I received so many insights into life and felt such a powerful love for the human experience. Setting: in my car for the actual trip, walking along the riverside for the afterglow Dose: 10-12 mg (my scale is not that accurate) It was definitely a light trip, no visuals, no time distortion, no mystical states, just everyday life and LOTS of powerful emotions Duration: 15 mins trip, 2 hours of very intense afterglow rich of insights I don't even know where to start. Words fail me. It was too much, even though the experience was completely ordinary, it was SO SHOCKINGLY PROFOUND at the same time. Perceptions were the same old ones, but the emotions that this trip evoked in me were out of this world. Love for life, love for my humanity, love for matter, love for this limited flawed experience, love and gratitude for having so much to live here and now. THE TRIP ITSELF The trip was just me, in my car, with ordinary reality and ordinary perceptions, realizing just how scared of life and of living fully I am. That's it. I cried a lot, I sighed a lot, It felt so good, I was letting it all out. It's ok, I am scared of life, I've been hurt, I have felt lost for so long (it's important to say that my life is getting better and better in the recent years, but this trip just revealed to me how deeply scared and damaged I've been my whole life and how I'm still scared and weak even after all the progress). I want to be free to connect with people, I want to be free to love others, I want to be free to be real, authentic, to be open-hearted. Lots of tears, mixed with the joy of feeling pure, feeling DEEPLY alive, once again. I thought I had regained my liveliness in the recent years, which is true, but this was a NEW LEVEL of life-passion, a new sparkle of fire, a purer kind of light. THE AFTERGLOW (2 hours) I went for a long walk along the river, where I saw people talking, people with their dogs, birds, the clear mirroring water, and cried a lot, sometimes of compassion for myself, sometimes of love and gratitude for being inside this human experience, gratitude for recognizing the gift of life itself. It was spirituality getting back to the Earth, to the roots. Here are the insights I got, most of them are covered in tears and sighs: 1. I was getting lost in the heavens. Too much spiritual seeking of the nondual states, especially sober. This made me detached from the earth and from the gift of life. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT INSIGHT, and mother to all others. I expected a trip into the sky, but I was instead sent deep into the earth, to regain connection with material life and its spiritual dimension. 2. Material life is spiritual. I was creating a sneaky duality where only meditative and self-inquiring states were becoming "the serious way to live". I was sooooo wrong!!! Earth is spirit. Blood is spirit. Pain is spirit. Flesh and bones are spirit. I was escaping into nonduality, creating some sort of dissociation from life. 3. The small things are the great things. Seeing those people with their dogs made me cry. I never realized how much light and wonder there is in these ordinary everyday situations. I deeply felt the magic of these people going out with the dog they loved and cared for. Life is full of experience, and experience is a gift. 4. Stop littering. I have always been a pro-ecology person, but recently I have started littering unconsciously because of some kind of frustration. I realized how much love and care I can show to life and to the absolute by just CARING about my Earth. By keeping these tissues and papers for myself to throw in a bin after is a sign of spiritual love for this place. This place has been given to me by God. I am not going to litter anymore. 5. Stop being so cautious around people. Life is meant to be messy and to be both a challenging and pleasant experience. You will be safe, but you need to be more vulnerable and open to people. You can choose to be less introverted and connect with new people. In fact I realized how much I want new connections and new friends, and how my fear is getting in the way of my desires. 6. Life is all about desire and passion. Life is also about awakening, but you CAN NOT use awakening as a dissociating tool to reduce pain from life. Pain is spirit. Suffering is spirit. You cannot avoid the messiness of life and awaken. So the insight repeats: get back to the roots, get back into the dirt and you will find spirit there. 7. You have moved towards the sky a bit too much recently. Move towards the earth. New levels of the awakening path will await you there, downwards, not upwards. You cannot grow your branches up in the sky if you are not growing your roots, or you will dissociate from life or even become psychotic. Be wise. 8. Fear is spirit. But don't let fear become an excuse. Fear is spirit, meaning that fear is a phenomenon of spirit, it appears in the spirit, but it is not a real ostacle to living life fully. Learn from it, don't get mesmerized by it. 9. Do not fear to love people deeply. Yes, you will get hurt again. It will benefit you, you are more awake now (not awakened, but just more awake than in the past), and you can grow and benefit from heartbreak. It will not damage you anymore. Living fully is feeling passions fully. This is how God meant it to be. 10. God is below. Not really above. It's a delusion of religion. God is in the small things. 11. DMT could not give you a lofty trip because that's not what grows you spiritually. What grows you spiritually is FINDING THE MAGIC IN LIFE, finding that LOVE IN CRUDE MATTER. The dirty raw soil you hold in your hands IS GOD!!!! It's not some lofty fantastical idea of being in pure bliss and light. Realize how much love and wonder there is in this raw chaotic and imperfect soil. It vibrates with passion for itself. DMT had to show you this, because spirituality is all about loving what is, not loving what you expect to be. I want to share this raw imperfect and impulsive poem, because that's something REAL I've felt, It's messy and intense, as life it's meant to be. As God wants it to be. Earth or heaven It doesn't matter Where you look for it God is found In Earth full of bones Leave the sky Drop your hopes Just feel it here It runs in you The pulse of blood The scorching sun The freezing air A cry of despair A tear of hope All of this just is The breath of God Do not seek elsewhere Just dive through The shades of life ❤️❤️❤️ Thanks DMT. I will come back.

Yes, I was shocked too. I was expecting some geometrical patterns and some nondual insights. Which I got from other psychedelics by the way.

Thanks to you ?? Did you have life changing trips with 5-meo-dmt? I mean practical implications from the trip. I'm still very scared to try it out.

You are talking about the true self, or God self. He is talking about our human form/ego. How does the ego die in practical terms? It's IMPOSSIBLE to remain forever in this limited form.

I've been waiting for the episode "What is Time" for a long time I hope he will release it soon.

I feel you might be right. The classic paranoid state is just the psychedelic effect of THC slamming your fears and anxieties in your face to heal them. One of the first times I tried it I encountered a deep fear of losing the people I love, and I surrendered and entered a deep meditative state where I released part of that fear and found some peace in acceptance. Weed can be really powerful but you should not resist the paranoia.

I really feel that last sentence I'm exploring weed too in these last weeks (never tried it before), and the existential terror it brings is way deeper than normal psychedelics. THC has a really eerie occult feeling that no other psych has, not even salvia. Reality becomes deeply mysterious during these trips, and your fears and anxieties are forced on you to be accepted. I like THC but it's not as pleasant as LSD for example.

That's true, but what's also true is that he renounced everything he could have built in his life. It's really hard to quit everything and start a yogic/sage life like him. It literally means that he threw away everything except his own body. I am quite sure that 99.99% of western people would never do that. Ramana certainly was cautious about danger, but he made the hardest choice in terms of lifestyle. Imagine a famous actor giving up fame, money, cars, sex etc to become a solitary sage. Impossible.

Yeah, I could not believe it. I read @Leo Gura's short replies about cannabis weeks ago, recounting that he had a massive awakening with it. And I also did a lot of reasearch on youtube (Nondual Therapy channel has nice videos on it), and it seems like several spiritual people have had intense psychedelic trips with THC. So I was really curious since I already have several psychedelic experiences and some higher states of consciousness from sober techniques. THE DOSAGE AND STRAIN I received this powerful italian strain (I am italian) of 20% THC and sativa dominant. After several days of anxiety and fear about it, I decided to try it. I weighed 25 mg of raw bud, which is very low, and put it in my small bong. Just two hits and nothing more. THE TRIP After the first hit I feel a lot more present, silent, and my desires and wants seem to fade away. Pleasant orange taste. Second hit, finishing up the tiny fragment of bud. "Well, there's nothing happening. I guess it's ok, I'll do something else." BOOOOM and it hits me. Massive waves of anxiety and fear start to torture me. Never happened so hard on psychedelics, it's the first time that it's so aggressive. Fear, fear, anxiety, terror. I'm gonna die!!! I feel like I'm mentally dying, and my body is almost completely relaxed and still. I recognize the ego death, so I decide to LET GO in order to avoid a bad trip. I surrender over the course of 3 minutes and my fast heart beat calms down. Silence. I am nowhere. I am nowhere to be found. Where am I? I am nowhere, this body... is just a body. This voice, is just a voice. I am nowhere. I start to feel that I am both nowhere and everywhere. I have small moments of deep samadhi with objects, but as soon as I start listening to my human voice, I get back into my ego and lose the samadhi. I notice that I FEEL SAFER in my ego. It feels safe. "I am this person" feels safe. It's the fear of death, the fear of losing free will and the fear of oneness. Massive energy waves Huge energy/frequency waves hit me from every where, they are almost colorful, but they are mostly felt with the touch sense. It's INFINITE energy. I feel infinite energy hitting me everywhere. There's infinite energy forever and ever and ever in existence. It never stops and it's limitless. For several minutes I have felt drowning in this infinite energy. It felt like an infinite quicksand, an infinite rabbit hole made of waves. I feel massive fear of losing completely myself in this infinite limitless texture of energy. What it means to be pure Pure means that you surrender to existence, to the universe, to the whole. The pure one is surrendered and humble. Not morally humble. It is existentially humble. Surrendering to the universe, which I decided to do, made me feel like I was gaining so much power, but I recognized that this power was NOT mine. It was NOT mine. It was of the whole, of the singularity. Surrendering your uniqueness gives you the power of the whole. That's purity. Fear of losing time and comedown Towards the end I start to feel so out of place, literally, that I was too afraid of going deeper. I could totally feel that I could go deeper, but I was too afraid to. Deeper into infinity. Deeper into oneness. Deeper into purity. It's TOO MUCH for me. So I start intentionally to practice monkey mind, listening to music and reflecting on my life. Sometimes I gain more humanness, but sometimes I become conscious of how I'm creating time and how I'm creating my lifestory (which is fiction) inside my head. So I freak out and start to do something else to distract. I notice that I tend to do automatic self inquiry in this trip, something I cannot stop because it seems part of the trip. Walk outside and total comedown At the end I decide to walk outside, and purposefully think. The presence is strong, so sometimes my mind goes blank and I feel a strong connection to everything After 40 min of walking I'm somehow out of the trip. 2 hours of peak state, 1.5 hours of comedown. What the fuck. Amazing experience but also really aggressive, especially the infinite waves. I guess I cannot smoke weed for relaxation and fun

This sounds like Salvia Divinorum Using Salvia I was creating some really colorful scenarios in my imagination.

It seems quite a common experience for spiritual people. I didn't expect so many similar experiences.

It seems to happen to a lot of spiritual people. Do you enjoy THC trips?

Hahah, yeah, I am pretty sure that these drastic changes in cannabis effects are due to a serious spiritual work. All the reports I've read, similar to my experience, are from people who have gained spiritual progress of some sort. You could say that classic weed is just "unconscious weed". But I will trip again with it, I will come back

No way Do you still use it?

Did you have that experience too?