RendHeaven

lmao there is no such thing as "being spiritual." That's a tier1 identity frankly.

I won't lie, the initial spark of sexual attraction is almost purely physical/visual. But assuming she passes that, I then see if she embodies my top values in a woman - especially the top 3. This process of "screening" is not a logical one, but an emotional/energetic one. It seems like a cold-hearted checklist when I write out the values in bullet points, but I never actually think of it in this way when I'm out meeting someone: #3 might sound like another physical/visual criteria, but it's not. It's an energy that is primarily felt, and although the presence of this energy is confirmed through observing the eyes and the voice, what I'm really looking for comes from a deeper place within the girl, an authentic expression of who she is and what she wants. This can't be faked. Some girls are subtly beaming like goddesses, others are withheld and "dead" inside. But hey I'm just some dude, I don't think guys really think about this stuff too much. For most men it's all subconscious.

@AtheisticNonduality Nah that's just standard turquoise.

You don't get it. The highest insights are literally incommunicable. It "physically" can't be done, you might say. At the highest levels, the notions of communicator and recipient as well as the notion of insight are all transcended and obliterated: It's just the Great "I Am" Beholding and Accepting Itself in Infinite dimensions to Infinite degrees of Simplicity and Complexity, All right Here and Now; you the human were never born and you will never die; your entire life and everything you've ever experienced is simultaneously literally Nothing and the Highest Expression of Cosmic Love. This is not an "insight," nor is this a "communication." It is Truth, and It is entirely trans-human; You "get It" in a flash by re-collecting Your True Nature as That "I Am," and in doing so You disown humanity, and life as was previously known dematerializes - everyone else melts away in the wake of Your Exalted Eternity, revealing themselves to be entirely Imagined and thus transient. There remains nobody for You to "share" this Beingness with, for You are One and All. When You Awaken, the Whole Universe Awakens with You, and You are Alone in Love. Everything above in bold describes Truth and is utterly meaningless.

I can't tell if this is sarcastic? I hope you meant it

How do we know that YOUR story is not the anomaly? To me, my experience is quite normal. In fact, my ex before this ex also asked me out. I have friends with similar stories of the girl initiating. You know, I have a sneaking suspicion that we are each defining "normal" based on our own experiences without accounting for the stories of others. Maybe "normal" is not such an objective concept, and people exhibit a range of behaviors? It's just a question ma'am ?

Don't need to. My ex was the one who seduced me into a beautiful 2 year relationship. I basically sat there doing nothing... I am a living example of a guy who accepted a woman's advance Or in other words, my mere existence is a contradiction to your original statement of, "All men don't like being approached, they reject." I'm curious, does that change your mind at all? Or will you choose to view my story as an anomaly? Lol I was literally just curious. I've made no conclusions as to ertopolice's desirability. In fact, I'm assuming the answer will be yes, that she does experience men approaching. My follow up curiosity question was going to be something like: "Are you unhappy with the quality/kind of men that approach you? If so, why?"

Do men not approach you?

Girl how can you possibly say "all men" with a straight face ?

This is the most mind-numbing post I've ever read bro. 100% self-serving bias and falsehood, I can't believe you expended the energy to write all of that. The average man is fine, dude. I see freakin' everybody and their mom in a relationship around me, it's actually kind of obnoxious. Stop projecting onto the collective male identity your own personal insecurities. Commit to learning attraction and becoming a better man!

Haha maybe question motivations + assumptions some more... it's so obvious that you have a massive pain point about society, you're fighting tooth and nail to separate society from the individual, demonizing the former and glorifying the latter. This reeks of self-bias, exactly what Leo was warning about. Until you see that SOCIETY = EVERYTHING YOU CONSIDER TO BE YOU, you're being dismissive and hasty. A proper exit from the social matrix is effortless and involves no battle. In fact, the one who has ascended the social matrix properly is precisely the one who cares not whether he participates in it. Yes, you really think you're an individual separable from "others people" around you LOL Sounds defensive. What if these dreaded "societal judgements" actually contained kernels of truth? Are you open to that? Yes, and this perfection includes the acknowledgement (rather than denial) of personal egoic tendencies + love for the "social matrix."

@7thLetter The "social matrix" that Leo speaks of is not merely a physical/activity-level participation, but rather a conceptual/idea-level participation. Even the most fundamental idea of being a human in a material world that was born and will die is "part of the social matrix." Even if you escape into a cave in the wilderness or something to "reclaim your sovereignty," so long as you believe yourself to be a human being, you're still participating in the social matrix. Ultimately, the social matrix is not meant to be escaped or rejected but rather observed in silence for its titanic influence. With proper awareness, you become free to dance in-and-out of it periodically, a feat which prior to awareness was not an option.

Spiritual ego is no different than regular old ego, and we've all got plenty of that. Go study yourself!

Ah, there it is. Your selfish bias Sounds like you like Rousseau lol Consider that there is no difference between your individual human identity and the "deluded social world." The two are intermeshed inseparably. To leave the social world is to leave your individuality. This is excellent. Just notice how you distract yourself as well.

He means much more than biological/physical survival when he says survival. He moreso means the psychological survival of your self-image. I mean I guess, but unless you are actually "free" of the social matrix right now in this moment, escape appears difficult. So the contention here isn't too meaningful. Untrue. You can empirically observe laziness using your own two eyes. Especially in yourself. I cannot tell you how many times I've set a simple mundane task to accomplish where I've failed to even start it. You can play fancy mental gymnastics about how societal conditioning is the cause of my inaction or whatnot, but the case remains that I was lazy. And blaming someone else for my laziness is just a further perpetuation of my own laziness! You like your individuality huh The fact that you took that as an attack is telling. I see no attack. Leo literally states that selfishness prevents you from realizing Truth. That's a very neutral statement. Dare I say a true statement! The idea of "wrong" is being projected by you, because (as far as I can tell) you seem to like your individuality and you don't want to let go of it. Notice that Leo never said anything about right or wrong in the entire episode. That's quite an arrogant stance, don'tcha think? In your scurry to abandon the social matrix, there's always the danger of just driving yourself deeper and deeper into your own delusions, as you cut off sources that could've helped you check yourself. I would be very careful before assuming that I know better than society. There's something very noble and wise about studying society generously and adequately before leaving it behind - as opposed to the foolish alternative of just saying "to hell with it all" without even bothering to investigate. Or, maybe you really are selfish and biased. Worth investigating

You don't need us to tell you this lol, the answers is inside you.

So basically, you're insecure.

@Sagar Gopalani Watch all of these for pretty much all the theory you need. Then go actually meet women. https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1UgnEo0cnySuJZOOICaGUi0sMEdAJbNum?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1iEmq4uiNAUFGaPoJhMr1Gc0Jodr2DqGx?usp=sharing

It's exceedingly obvious to me that he just made all of this up on a whim, he's literally self-defining "coral" and using the clout of the actual SD model to appear authoritative. No different than me proposing that there is a stage magenta above all other stages which y'all haven't seen yet, with some arbitrary distinction metric. But since I'm using the words "spiral dynamics," you have no choice but to believe me. Also, there's a huge conflating of ego-transcendence and climbing SD stages (I see this in the video as well as all over the forum). SD stages are OF EGO DEVELOPMENT. The whole model presupposes ego (individually and collectively). All SD does is track ego! So you can't just make up a stage coral+ and call it the "egoless stage" because if you do that, you've changed your "object of study" at that point. We are tracking ego here. No ego, no SD model. Furthermore, if you've actually properly spent time embodying stage yellow systems thinking, you should already be noticing the relative and arbitrary nature of SD as a whole. And by the time you enter turquoise (whole heartedly), you're basically "above" the distinction-making game. You no longer play in the sandbox where the SD model is being etched.

Lol so cute that it's framed as a "breakthrough," but historical texts have been saying this for literal millennia.

@Myagooshki yeah! and you will probably see unicorns in the aether once you hit stage magenta in tier 4!

Yes, any form of free content works as long as the clear value is there. Personally I prefer YouTube videos, but consider that I may be biased. I am here from watching Leo on YouTube, after all... I would say it boils down to what makes you feel the most creative. You've gotta fall in love with the creation process. NP

Well said!

Leo's homepage at https://actualized.org/ is actually a beautiful example of how to do it right: Notice everything in his banner informs you of how Leo will help you: Showing his face gives him a sense of trustworthiness. Even though Leo has actually gone through life-coaching certification and training program, he doesn't talk about that. Instead, he talks about his 300+hours of FREE videos. Next, he literally shoves the free content in your face: Lastly, he makes a quick and easy pathway for you to hand him money: Notice the use of colors and icons too. Everything is made clickable. It's like a well-oiled machine.

@Btraining NP bro! Good luck, I'm rooting for you. I also slightly edited my original post by adding more clarification on how to frame your free content.