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  2. Nothing worth it comes easy. The struggle is the path. It sucks to get hit but maybe its what was needed to bring yourself down to earth. Nothing permanent happened it seems so you lucky. Just cuts and bruises and teeth. The path is God punching itself in the face until it gives up. When you recover get right back onto it but with the knowing of this feeling that it will end. You need to know you are great and keep it between you and God. Mind says im great mouth says im shit on the bottom of a child predators boot.
  3. @Terell Kirby thank you
  4. If self-awareness were the generality among events AND events were disharmonious, what is it about the intrinsic properties of events that is in conflict?
  5. Wishing you a speedy recovery, glad you made it out alive. We all fall into fantasies and self deception-even the most “enlightened” of us. God Realization and Awakening can turn into their own unique set of self deceptions. Seems like you’ve made great progress in many areas of your personal development and spirituality at 27-it’s ok to incur some unexpected hurdles along the way. Take care of yourself
  6. @Emerald Events repeats and only thereby do we identify them, unless we identify a singular event through its similarity to another event. In both cases there is a generality, so far as they are conclusions the former would be called inductive and the latter deductive. Is this tendency for generality self-awareness? Or is the self-awareness additional to this tendency? Assuming the curious proposition that "events can in principle be in harmony" holds true and there were thousands of various events, maybe millions, and all of them were generalised, and all generalised events were self-awareness, would we rely on those events being themselves actually in harmony for that self-awareness to be in harmony with itself? And if those events do fail to be in harmony with one another, can that be an intrinsic property of the events themselves or is it a property of them already interacting with a disharmonious self? If the answer to this question is determinable, would it be critically important to answer it? -- If self-awareness were additional to the tendency for generality among events, would that be compatible with events only being disharmonious through their interaction with that self-awareness? If self-awareness were the generality among events, would that be compatible with events being disharmonious?
  7. Reminds me of myself. In the past year or so, I’ve started to shred tears more often. Whether it is something integrous that I am experiencing, or sadness, or beauty and the magic of reality. I always thought I was quite in touch with my femininity but I feel like once I turned 30, I unlocked a completely new level of femininity (just fully realized this now as I’m writing) I broke off from my long-term relationship that was misaligned despite loving each other dearly, and that freed up so much time and energy for me to just be with me, and get more in touch with my femininity (find deeper alignment in myself). In the past 5 years, I’ve grown so damn much and had to face, accept, and let go so many damn painful lessons and harsh truths that I feel like it’s finally catching up integrating and reaching into my being. Of course the breaking up makes me tear up due to sadness, but lately I find myself tearing up almost daily from also seeing integrity, hearing beautiful music, touching the depth of life etc. It is to the point where my whole dancing style has transformed from aggressive hip hop to a soft, graceful, yet powerful style - it is a completely unique style that I am gonna develop further. I have yet to give it a name but something along the lines of ’Majestic Dancing’.
  8. The only difference between Democratic Socialists and maga are race and income, they're the same ideology.
  9. My guess is he is going to bomb nyc and is being cute.
  10. Late tier 1 with some tier 2 insights
  11. I’m 27, and a few weeks ago I got hit by a car while crossing the street. I’m not writing this for sympathy. I’m writing because it feels like this accident “ripped me out of my fantasies,” and I want to unpack the spiritual side of it with people who actually think deeply about this stuff. Quick background For context: I’ve been on the personal development / spirituality grind for about 8–9 years straight. Heavy focus on: Pickup / social skills / dating Music (I rap / sing, record and mix my own stuff) Business/marketing (SMMA, content, etc.) Spirituality: meditation, kundalini, psychedelics (including 5-MeO), karma, nonduality, etc. I’ve worked with a long-term spiritual teacher who studied under Namgyal Rinpoche. For years I basically saw him as “the guy” – my growth teacher, enlightened, at the highest level of development, etc. My self-image for most of my 20s was: “I’m the dedicated one. I’m special. I’m spiritually ahead of the curve. This struggle is all building toward a big win: music success, women, money, influence, etc.” On top of that, this year I: Moved downtown to really go all-in on music + a social media / automation agency. Got scammed by a Tai-Lopez-type company for the agency side. Paid for music marketing that didn’t deliver on what was promised. So even before the car, the story of “my big breakthrough is right around the corner” was already cracking. The accident: I was crossing a street I’ve crossed many times before (yes, technically jaywalking, like most people do on that stretch). The road looked clear when I started crossing. A car came faster than I expected; next thing I know, I’m hit and thrown. I end up with: Leg injuries (casts, pain, limited mobility) Dental trauma (teeth moved, dental work, follow-ups) General shock to my system - I’m psychically healing and will most likely be back to normal by new years, thankfully. What hurts most isn’t just the body – it’s the story collapse Before the accident, I was doing: A lot of gratitude work Daily spiritual practices “Manifestation” / self-concept work Deep belief in things like “frequency,” “karma clearing,” “life by design” I also had this subconscious narrative: “I’m on a special path. My teacher is enlightened. I’ve done 5-MeO. I’m not like ‘normal’ people stuck in the rat race. My reward is coming.” Then: I get scammed financially. My big marketing plans fizzle. I start questioning if my teacher is actually my growth teacher for this next phase or if I’ve been over-idealizing him. I get hit by a car in a very ordinary, human, non-mythic way. Emotionally, it feels like: The “chosen one” story died. The fantasy of “I’ll be successful by 27” died. The idea that “if I do enough spiritual work, life will spare me from big painful events” died. Spiritually, what I think is happening I’m not saying this is The Truth, but this is the frame I’m playing with: Grief for the fantasy self I’m grieving not just the accident, but the version of me who thought: “I’m ahead of everyone spiritually.” “My teacher + my practices guarantee a smoother path.” “By 27 I’ll already be that guy – money, women, music success, status.” That identity doesn’t fit anymore. It’s like an old skin that got ripped off instead of gently shed. 2. Karmic / psychological “activation” I did a lot of consistent gratitude and “higher frequency” work over the last year. One way to see it: When you raise your baseline, whatever doesn’t match that level (old fear, worthlessness, self-betrayal, family patterns, scarcity) gets pushed to the surface. The accident, scams, disappointments, tension with family, doubts about my teacher – it all feels like old karma and patterns being forced up at once. 3. De-idolization of teachers and destiny I still respect my teacher a lot, but I’m seeing more clearly: He’s human. He may not be the person who can walk me through this very practical, material phase of life. I projected “savior” and “special initiation” onto him. I’m also seeing how much I outsourced responsibility to: Teachers Manifestation methods Spiritual narratives (“this means I’m chosen,” “this proves I’m advanced,” etc.) 4. Shift from “mythic destiny” → self-leadership It feels like life is asking: “Can you lead yourself without the fantasy of being special? Can you keep going without any guarantee of fame, success, or cosmic reward?” That’s a very different game than: “I’m the chosen one, therefore I’ll be protected.” It’s more like: “I’m a human. I’ve trained a lot of skills. My life is fragile and not guaranteed. What do I choose now?” Why I’m posting this here / what I’m asking I know this forum is full of people who’ve gone through: Disillusionment with teachers and “gurus” Harsh life events that shattered spiritual fantasies The shift from mythical narratives to raw self-authorship Have you gone through a phase where life “ripped you out of your spiritual fantasy”? How do you balance genuine spiritual insight with not turning your life into a grandiose story? What does mature self-leadership look like after disillusionment? Any practical pointers for this phase?
  12. That was really creepy for me to see yeah I think trump is two faced and will say whatever to benefit his currently agenda. Which was known before but seeing it so clearly like that is very off putting.
  13. Just try to quiet the mind like you did this morning but dwell in actuality. Funny fhe forum is named that.
  14. That was a tiny investment of his hedge fund, not how he got rich. He funds environmentalist groups, lobbying efforts, and political campaigns.
  15. Today
  16. Vibin out to this one. Playlist is 🔥
  17. My guess is Trump realizes Mamdani is popular right now. And considering they just got crushed on affordability during the last election, he wants to cash in on that. Trump will suck up to anyone who he thinks will increase his power. It's also possible that Mamdani charmed him because Trump is easy to manipulate. I doubt their goodwill holds long.
  18. When awakening becomes purely conceptual, it shows up as dismissiveness, lack of warmth, and a kind of philosophical detachment from lived human experience. That's what I meant by 'awakening without the heart.' This is where awakening becomes warm, grounded, transparent, relaxed. No need to convince anyone, No desire to prove your realization, No urgency. Whats happening for many people online is that they are mentally overstimulated, so even awakening becomes mostly mental. That the mind can get so overactive or charged that spiritual insight itself becomes just another trick it plays to avoid full, embodied awakening If someone were truly embodying the truth they speak, they wouldn't feel the need to repeatedly post, preach, or reinforce it, as constant repetition usually points to underlying doubt.
  19. There's nothing you're saying I really disagree with. I think minimizing male sexual frustration is wise from a societal POV. And yes, historically society has had mechanisms in place that helped with that. But if you want to understand why people can be so apathetic, it's because of how male biological sorting works. Fair or unfair, some percentage of men are considered collateral damage. So if you don't want to be collateral damage, you have to take responsibility and compete. Otherwise you will get sorted by default. Competition is not strictly "dog eat dog". Competition always includes cooperation, alliances, bonding etc. Which means playing by certain rules.
  20. Trump just had a in person meeting with Mamdani. Despite previously calling him a dangerous communist, and Mamdani during the meeting saying yes when asked if trump is fascist and accusing Israel of genocide, Trump mostly ignored this and was very warm and friendly towards him Interestingly most democrats in congress just voted on a measure to condemn socialism, whereas in this meeting Trump a fault said he’d be fine living in New York governed by the democratic socialist Mamdani
  21. As for Jesus eating meat, if we’re being honest and historically realistic: The Essenes ate no flesh. They practiced strict raw food diets. They believed in subtle bodies and purification. They taught breathwork, fasting, and living foods. They called the body "the temple of God." These passages match Essene tradition almost perfectly. And the Essenes are the group Jesus was most shaped by. So yes, these teachings are far closer to the kind of thing a fully awakened Jewish mystic of that lineage would teach than the modern Christian church’s teachings. And if Christ had full realization, he absolutely would: Teach harmlessness Teach purification Reject unnecessary killing Align with oneness Teach diet as part of spiritual transmutation Because a fully realized being sees every creature as themselves.
  22. You may not recognize it, but I am doing you a great kindness right now in challenging your ideas. But you must understand that you're not asking me for empathy. You're asking me to coddle you and to tell you comforting lies, so that you don't have to take personal responsibility for your own dating problems or take responsibility for solving them. And I am giving you VERY specific actionable advice... get acquainted with women, make friends with women, and interact with women. It doesn't get more concrete than that. And it's quite simple to understand that that's what you must do, even if there are challenges to doing so. And let's be real, it isn't that women don't like you. You haven't even interacted with women enough to know whether or not a specific woman likes you or not. And women are not a monolith or a hivemind. Some women will like you. Some women will dislike you. That's how it goes with people from any group. So, it's not that women (as a hivemind in your imagination) don't like you... it's that you don't like women as a collective group, which is why you refuse to interact with them or make acquaintances with them. Take responsibility for your own feelings of dislike towards women instead of projecting your own dislike towards women as a group onto female strangers and believing that they collectively and monolithically dislike you. I think the reason why you don't find our exchanges "productive" (aka comforting) is because I'm telling you to take personal responsibility for your own issue that blocks you from doing the legwork to become acquainted with women... which is the only way of finding a partner and getting your desired outcomes with women. It's more comfortable to see this problem as a problem women must solve for you... and that women are to blame for. You just don't want to take personal responsibility. You'd rather just finger-wag random women you aren't acquainted with for not fulfilling your fantasy of spontaneously given charitable romantic love. If 100% of women are strangers to you, you simply cannot rationally expect that women that you don't know are going to come breaking down your door to give you romantic love and kindness. That is the fantasy that I'm trying to break you of. And that is why I am sharp and not soft. It would be incredibly mean of me to re-inforce your victim's mentality rationalizations and coddle you and be like, "Don't worry sweetie baby honey pumpkin. None of this is your responsibility. It's not your problem to solve. It's those mean women who are at fault that are responsible for the problem, and so they are the only ones who have the power and responsibility to fix it. You are powerless in this situation, so you obviously can't fix the problem. So, you have no responsibility at all in the matter. Just wait for a selfless stranger woman to come and save you purely out of the goodness of her own heart." And it would be incredibly unkind to validate this idea because it would allow you to languish in victim's mentality and powerlessness where you never solve your own problem.
  23. Insight isn’t the whole picture my friends, awakening has layers. Awakening can start as a mental realization, but full spiritual development includes the heart, the body, the nervous system, and the subtle emotional layers. Some people stop at the insight level (no-self / no-separation), but deeper embodiment continues long after that. This affects behavior, lifestyle, choices, and even diet. And when embodiment matures, harming other beings becomes naturally impossible. When the heart fully opens and the body is purified, the felt-sense of Oneness becomes so strong that harming or killing another creature feels like harming yourself. It's not a moral stance. It's a direct energetic sensitivity that emerges from embodiment. Diet matters not as ideology, but because it influences the subtle body. Different foods affect the nervous system, emotions, and energetic clarity. Heavy, dead, or violently-obtained foods make embodiment harder and blunt sensitivity. Lighter, living foods support clarity, empathy, and subtle awareness. This isn't about dogma, it's about how physiology and consciousness interact. And historical spiritual traditions understood this. Many ancient traditions, including the Essenes, early Buddhists, Taoists, yogic traditions ect... saw diet as part of spiritual purification. Whether or not the passages quoted are historically exact, the underlying principle is very old: consciousness expresses through the body, so purifying the body changes the expression of consciousness. This is the overall essence of my teachings and sharings. I’m not claiming superiority, just pointing to an aspect of awakening many modern teachings ignore. I’m not saying some people are 'less enlightened.' I’m saying modern non-duality often emphasizes mental awakening and ignores embodiment. As when embodiment deepens, lifestyle habits often shift naturally, not out of ideology, but because sensitivity increases. Awakening includes how you live, not just what you realize. If realization doesn't transform behavior, relationship to the body, or relationship to life, then it's not yet fully integrated. Not because of morality, but because the body, heart, and mind become aligned. For some people, that includes losing the desire for meat or cooked food. For others, that comes later or never, but it's part of the potential path.
  24. Has anyone pointed out that Leo in Italian is not pronounced like Leo the owner of this site
  25. I don't get it, how is he an environmentalist if he made his fortune investing in coal mining? "Steyer’s hedge fund past includes controversial investments in coal mining and migrant detention facilities that could draw attacks from rivals." https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2025-11-19/billionaire-hedge-fund-founder-tom-steyer-is-running-for-governor

  26. Medical School Journal

    oOo replied to oOo's topic in Self-Actualization Journals

    Diary: Medical School Journal. Chapter: Life in Experiential Recursion (chapter entries seem like a smart idea). Date: November 22nd entry. Type: Consciousness stream. Part/s: 1 of 2. Ran out of time. Entry number: #3. 0----------0----------0----------0 Title: Sleeping attractions to Awakened Catharsis. Recursion. Continuous learning. Replaying the moment. The ability to replay a feeling and experience it, hides the architecture of my control over every other consciousness state. When I am able to replay the moment, not as some perfect digital object but for all its natural contours, the present moment experiences juxtaposition. As I look around myself, it is obvious that most people experience their consciousness in exhalation. Mediation with awareness from A to B does not characterise the spectrum, it is the meta-awareness and its scalability of experience, or rather, its individual experiences, which opens the doors from inhalation to digestion to memory, to exhalation that has truly tasted something we may sublimate as "the fruit of life". Understanding this as a temporal span that biases the energy of my own experience forces the question in me, am I paying enough attention and what are the anchors that create the gestalt we refer to as our embodied whole for me to properly understand how I should be governing my attention? Most experiences I have are as good as gone in the next moment rendering my recollection of them in the next, beautifully granulised, an impossible task. Analogous to AI's attempts at recreating one's visions through shallow linguistic prompts, selections are made in the same way selections are made among the minds interpretations of the past, followed by a pairing phase between memory relived and the respective identity whether it’s ourselves or the narrative, artwork or larger project we’re working on. The described juxtaposition in my consciousness I notice happens in a number of ways. I may be attracted by a woman, wonder why she's still on my mind an hour later, only to have the memory of attraction refreshed to noise by another woman in the next moment as she steals my gaze with a stare that forces an imbalanced circulation of hormones. This gives rise to thinking about state through a kind of hyper-lens, something I may call the hyper-state-temporal, which is a different infatuation than with purely the construct of time itself. That is, instead of becoming preoccupied with any one state-experience external pairing, its utility in understanding the internal mechanisms that self-govern the "governance and release" valve. Helping me differentiate where my power lays versus the power of a woman and where the absence in analogous awareness is a description of not only my own powerlessness, but that of the general population concerning nearly any pull from consciousness they have especially to those wills externalised, potentially corrupted by them too. Outside of course, consideration of those pulls to make love with another, pulls that are inept when it comes to differentiating the purity of intent versus its obscuring. The myopia of choice by attraction sharing the same chasm as the modus operandi of all billion-dollar capitalistic investment scandals of course. It's interesting, the regeneration of time following the movement of one attraction to the next I see, greatly impacts the temporal context viewed and how people are revealed. The instancy of beauty noticed hides the beauty of another that takes longer to realise, returning my gaze out towards the world into something that mirrors infancy more than the maturity they may superimpose on any words relayed towards an attraction. There were after all, several other women within one reach that instead of being noticed, felt like props on a stage in which my consciousness attempts to deny its own selfhood by revealing itself through the vines of attraction wrapping around any meaningful tie to reason my subjective reality has over understanding itself through its self-generated smoke, vines it instead anthropomorphises as its chance for unity through 'biological interfacing' of spirit. It’s the amplification of otherwise neutral stimuli by dual biological intersection between gender and sexual orientation meeting future dissolution after reading Ayn Rand. More meaningfully though, for any distortions that occur the two-and-throw between hyper-temporalization of states of consciousness and the hyper-indexing that follows from granulized self-insight on their existence, opens the gates to a funnel that filters for preferential sanity amidst otherwise a hopeless decay of foresight that sees its own self-denial from the future looking back, a future self warning me of the costs of divorce court and an unplanned pregnancy? Impregnating for depth, I know I need to reach for maturity in understanding my own consciousness reactions beneath the hood. Hyper-indexing simply means the insight thats forged between one or more hyper-temporalised experiential spaces, say in relation to the temporal contrast forged by comparing one attraction to another and how by one (or the memory of one) silencing for little reason outside of the beauty of another they both cancel one another out The lesson in realising one's own self-deceit and the folly of self-persuasion of potential future fatherhood based on choiceless reactions depending on fleeting attractions, apparently ultimately fails the Turing test for genuine consciousness. A self-insight to personal growth which changes the homologous category of ‘attraction to potential ineffable posturing' after reason of course eventually fails after the intellectual transformation and nature, or just present evolution, takes its rightful place, evolving my consciousness through the dual program of insight and hormonal rebellion, and therefore chaos to unexpected ordered synthesized memory. This leaves me to wonder, has this shifting between attraction - temporal indexing - insight revealed the very mechanism that complete impeturbability is achieved, or is impeturbability merely an unmistably illusory resolve as a psychoanalyst may say? The imperturbability is only an outcome of dual cognitive shadowing though where processing balances any conclusion towards stress by managing expectations, beliefs and desires, along with locus of control, or just its absence often felt as loss. If I have only realised this now, why only now? I suppose the only conclusion was that the underlying mechanisms were saturated by not only the experiences themselves but the philosophies curated around them. I was not questioning experience enough, I was free-styling with the skateboard I was given rather than inventing the ski's. Producing an unawavering blindness proportional to the lack of genuine insight regarding. I can add more to this nomenclature of blind-freddy. But gosh when am I going to fully recover from the effects of these seizures. I feel like I'm consistently choosing the shortest straw of the variations of myself with nothing else to reach for, with a future self reaching into the mud in which I dwell to pull me out with straw to become stick. That said, let me get back to the drawing board. Reward based consciousness is a paradoxical virtue, I know I've gotta have it at the seams of consciousness independence, the heel of the boot of agency. For what other power is there to yield that is not free from the over-consumption of power other than the awareness agency subsubes? This independence creates the arch by which the rest of the world enters, that creates chemical dissolution of the effects of the worlds stagnancies. A place of coming and going of the world's effects that mirrors what are some archtypes of the described imperturbability, at least in some of their appearances. Agency is the only real definition of both reward, power and independence; not to mention consciousness that has any business at all with the ups and downs of doing's and "Something or other's". This is admirable reward seeking behaviour that I have been seeking in the past, however without the sophistication on how to upgrade the vehicle of self with some extra subwoofers and spoilers that gave the appearance of agency. A stronger voice, bicep (s) and the raging hormones. A partial product of injected partial views from "how to be a man" by something or other author, argumentation no longer or intricate other than "You here my voice don't you? That's a man. I am man. We are man. Done". It breaks ice without knowing how to carve it, and that's the reason I am looking for in the intricacy of discovering my own manly consciousness. As it should be and as a man should be doing, curating his own design of himself and much more as to me, and perhaps I will end the claim further by the end of this entry, it is man's agency, his choice, his self, his will, that by design he is meant to wield this power into designing the architecture of his being, and that is his sole differentiation and his soul yearning. The very definition of a beta-male versus an alpha-male is not that its too simplistic of a dichotomy and we should throw it out, it is to the degree that he wields his own choice as his own choice. Maturity of that choice is an overlapping voice, however a man must start with choice discernment to graduate that maturity and he will not truly start that developmental phase until he has started to truly wield those powers on his own behalf. This becomes the reward of being a man, and this is precisely how a man chases the reward of being himself and the degree to which he becomes embroiled in the illusions of the rewards externalised to his senses tricking him into the belief they're instead an internal resolve, is by that degree precisely that energy will be taken away from his purpose here. A man is an architect, and so when he falls into the reward architectures of the world, his will becomes programmable and his soul always feels like something is missing. Creating a loop between the programmed belief that relieving this yearning is found in the external apparitions of reward, chasing, perhaps momentary satiation, finalised by a continued unmet yearning that lay deeper beneath the architecture of his will that upon reaching the end of his tongue, becomes the figurative voice that architects the world. Men build to create structures from the physical to the meta-physical, a place in which people can safely dwell within those confines. Those structures can be outgrown and those structures can be reached as the next step. By men, I can say "masculine principle" if that moves better however the point is still the same, the persons trying to be a man so let them be as there are plenty of men that have forgotten their path, and that is the definition of a beta male. The beta male is not less in design, however the truth that he has forgotten makes him less in the meaning of who he is meant to be underneath. Moreover this truth does not weaken even when we consider people that are merely struggling to function at these limits, in fact to me, that is taking away their dignity of at the very least what they were destined to become and so they shouldn't be lessened by any weaker categories or just anything that follows with definitions that presuppose they were meant for anything less other than to wield the power of their god given sentience, something that is undoubtedly mirrored by over-capability, with our stretching towards extending these powers and something that as we know is pioneered by those that have embraced this masculine. This over-reaching, is calculated immaturity, and the weight of maturiy its possessed by, take the interests of Neuralink as just one simple but meaningful example, are only relative to the protection and genuine growth it affords the rest of the tribe, which in this case is not only yet to be determined and hardly to the level of the companies ambition, which includes close to the whole of humanity. Moreover, man's (principle of the masculine - why not use them analogously now) imperturbability as I contemplated, is the calm in the storm that's achieved once he wields this from narrative to bearing the fruits of the practical causes that follow. There is no secret recipe as some have assumed, and as I initially pondered, "Have the thing of nature do the thing it is meant to do and you will see it splended". Anxiety, neurosis and these things in men, are when he is afflicted with the demons of paralysis, an affliction that we should not wish upon even our worst enemies or evil men if we have a choice between this and instead steering the masculine's role to its soverign respect for the natural world from which it spawned. To myself and something that is undoubtedly symptomatic to this greater cause when culturally applied, the first realisation is in realising your existence is not only taking part in a social contract, it is a social contract, and power differentials are the sole medium and balance by which all social contracts are formed. The masculine must understand that its first social contract is between itself and its respective society, if not its tribe and or family which bares the same characteristics so for now I will not elaborate more than the category of society as an informal practical use, even though in some arguably many instances depending on the demographic, the family can be denoted as its own social contract separate to the respective larger society simply because of the larger influence of family than society. The masculines second social contract is between itself and its conscience, the latter which has great influence from the first contract and is the first symbiotic contract, at least the one that is most felt. The third social contract is between itself and all of creation (i.e. analogous to God, mother nature or however one wishes to denote), and this is where now two symbiotic contracts are now built with the fourth social contract, beween its identity and its essence. Each contract is interesting in its own right, with the first contract descriptive of so much that the individual compares themselves to and it is by this comparison that they're easily unknowingly used to their disrepair relative to the lack of health of a given society, of which ours if we parse it as 'the western world' is at its all-time worst stage. Most minds do not eagerly divide themselves to the extent of transforming this noise of the pairing between societal comparison and identity formation to quicken the pathway towards personal individuation, and in todays times this is more than ever a threat to the masculine principles development, directly harming the sovereignty of choice that leads to healthy governance. A bubble that becomes even larger and closets the self even further when their social influences are equally non-divisional therefore living an equivalent unconscious state of comparison. Becoming the source of non-individuating competition among friends and uniquely, stretching to romantic relationships when its states are determined by comparison over joint social division towards an individuated harmony curated in a romantic relationship that mutually determines growth parameters. In fact arguably, one could say every non-equal dimension between two otherwise compatible partners is by equal measure descriptive of the depth and breadth of unhealthy comparison emergent from the first social contract that now the symbiosis defines over two individuated partners. Todays lack of depth in our society is mirrored in the relationhsips of most demographics, revealing the widespread issue of individual selves and the self they're meant to uniquely find jointly through relationships unethered through the constraints of being defined by unhealthy comparison, with the shallowness of societies architectures unsurprisingly correlated with the short-term nature of relationships, monkey branching from one to the next with shallowly defined ease as illusory 'empowered choice', never realising that this 'choice' is being extrinsically defined right beneath the noise that cloacks it. We require the mirror of our given society to provide the individual who's healthy response to their society is that yes, they're just a "cog in the wheel" as its misguidedly usually stated in the negative, but the reason for this negative is that its derivative of the given society demanding conformity while forgetting that it is merely "the sum of its parts". To the extent that a given society is healthy, it does not demand anything of the individual but instead demands itself to require the mirror of the individual towards growth, built upon a healthy foundation leading to a healthy feedback loop of individuation no different to any other relationship. The reason why this demand works of course is that it contains the hidden premise that any given society is made in the individuals own image, by comparisons within the tribe that are together meant to forge 'collective reason' which is meant to be emblematic of a given society, defining itself through this collective synthesis which leads to genuine reinvention also reflected in the individual on their natural path of metamorphosis, not just the compression of noise which perpetuates maladaptive stagnation and resulting decay. The second mechanism at play here in the deterioration of the masculine principle through this first social contract is where shallowness is made in great supply through the efficiency of production creating boundless choice among equally bad options. Shallowness however that is marketed through techniques designed to leverage the knowledge of our biologies evolutionary engineered reward-systems. This information is used against the individual and a society that is defined more by its commerce than by its art is inevariably going to turn 'individual' into sellable ether and 'home-grown business' into a machine that sells the ether as efficiently as possible as the solution to the loss of the individual via comparative driven purchases from equally shallow sources that become weaker in supply at each iterative cycle towards cultural degeneracy. However what's important to note is that once the individual salvages the return of their soul an interesting transformation emerges. Once the first contract between self and society which previously threatened the individuals existential growth via boundary obstruction is discovered as the contract violation that it is, threat transforms back into self-knowledge. Self-knowledge of what one is still yet to become no longer through unhealthy comparison but revelation from what their respective society still lacks in its prevailing collective-knowledge and therefore societal image. As the self moves further back into its status as a genuine individual and stronger along its path towards individuation, one that contradicts all mirrors including demographic ties which is a choice by necessity rather than idealism, increased insight on the contract violation combined with sustained maturity leads individual to often redefine its role as someone that helps restore the health of the contract itself. Aka, restoration of the masculine principle back into the individual to carry out its rightful purpose in aiding the design and passage of their respective tribe and or society. Masculine anxiety, gone. Masculine neurosis, gone. Masculine perturbability, gone. Masculine calm, returned. Masculine purpose, returned. Masculine solidarity, returned. And ready to be put back into realities legal clause governing the reasonability of the masculines continued existence following this restoration of its sovereign identity. A sovereign identity which is symbiotic to its relationship with reality, as will be further defined in the third social contract. As shallow comparison meets the obstruction of meaningful choice and therefore the decay of sovereign will, so too then the obvious path between self and society, and with that, a conscience that often leads to neurosis as expressed in todays modern mental health epidemic. All things being equal, a healthy conscience is the bedrock of a healthy functioning masculine principle as it provides the fuel to the fire of an already aligned and engaged purpose driven existence in as much as the individual is already aligned with its path of individuation. Obstruct the conscience through shallow societal reason and 'the self' will equally misweigh the balance between its wants and needs with the needs of a given societ. Continually informing the self's essence that not only what it wants as programmed by society is out of alignment with its needs but that what society says its needs are totally out of alignment with the intrinsic desires of what the self wants to truly give. The mirror image of socities wants in the western world is that of more commerce, less nature, more problems in relationships as that leads to more isolation which equals more digitized selves and therefore more likes and subscriptions which it also wants, more trauma as that leads to more diagnoses which is also good as that leads to more medications that can be sold, more people on welfare because that leads to more mindlessness which also leads to more internet use and further deterioration of relationships and all for one thing. The accumulation of immature power born out of the mismatch between the conscience of self and the conscience of society. Society has done great damage to its conscience through the recursive lost of individual conscience, and together, they have eroded one another towards the world we are all a collective part of today. The person now born out of the image of society rather than its symbiotic relationship in the growth of its individuality, with little conscience happily erodes another as its societally reinforced via the dichotomy between the objectification of the individual which the persons conscience mirrors combined with the corruption vs the dual objectification of any meaningful security governance within a given society like that of the police force, CIA and FBI. Their erosion, erodes not just the society, but the erosion of the individual that gets injured by the person that's been programmed by the death and decay of their moral structures. Further too then, when the persons programming is influenced by demographics that denounce morality due to the weaknesses in its reason rather than seeing morality that follows a path of evolution equal to the evolution path followed by maturity as opposed to a failure of reasoning itself as many social media influences misguidedly believe and in return, spread in their social following. Thereby making it an even stronger virus that infects the sustenance that protects any mature resolve towards the sanctity of life beyond merely being a philosophical bumper sticker that gets repackaged and re-sold as cheap as culturally possible. Perpetuating the **game theoretic mismatch** between the individuals knowledge of the societal contract and society itself through pedastallised ignorance masquerading as leadership. Game theory being a very important lens by which many conflict vs cooperative situations between society and the individual can be defined, encompassing too the outgrowth of respective demographics taking a non-reducible part in a game-theoretic feedback loop of systems level growth vs degeneration in that contract en masse. Because demographics create a very interesting juxtaposition between the first contract between self and society, self and conscience. Given how in one instance where there is the decay of a given societies conscience and as examined the conscience of the individual, the negative impacts of this which can often lead to neurosis followed by mental disorder, as made very visible in some cases demographics can often, if not contributive, be a salvation point for the individual where that contract between self and society is at risk to the individuals development. Personal growth groups unsaturated by meaninglessness often occupied by economically biased self-help is an example of this. That said however, just having the space whereby an individual can express themselves as themselves like in therapy groups similar to variations of "12 steps (i.e. alcoholic recovery groups)" can be its own form of healing as the individual begins to mirror itself through smaller tribes rather than a failed societal self-image it weakly compares itself to. Something that is crucial in a given society in as much as there has been an indirectly favoured breakdown and fracturing of the family unit such as in our own, that otherwise, the individual previously relied upon as the strength and backbone of its self-differentiation over the society in which it dwelled in preparation for taking part in the building of societies image rather than being controlled by it. As families have however become increasingly more traumatised by the economic mismatch between tradition and family rituals as simple as turninng Christmas into an economic opportunity, the trauma has followed on the individual as families increasingly fail to learn the tools that govern healthy development of their offspring, furthering the fracturing that not only can lead to relying on demographics that are positive outgrowths but falling into the hands of negative demographics that led to the inherent need for those positive demographics to begin the individual on the path towards the return to him or herself. When the conscience within a society, its prevailing demographics and therefore the majority of individuals is degraded enough, "All is fair in naievty and power" becomes an incredibly haunting game-theoretic differential between those with the knowledge of power and those without. Well, I still have more to unravel. But time won't allow it. Hopefully will have recovered slightly more by next week. This free-styled journal is a good measurement of progress of said seizure recovery. Attention still fades in and out sometimes, but the solidarity of my sense of identity in the biological sense is mostly restored. Will have a mixture of completing this in the next entry combined with catharsis towards its next outgrowth. Heh, it’s all just imperturbable reps and sets. When aligned, yes. Best regards.
  27. So guess they were overly excited? Seems like nothing has happened.
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