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Cold approach has limited upside in terms of the social life you can build. If you're able to get decent recents with cold approach that's cool but social circle allows you to take those women that you approach and invite them to events to build a whole network and community for whatever you want. I host photoshoots and business events for example, you might have different interests. Cold approach also is just 1 on 1 so really either you end up dating one of the women you like and that's the end of it or you just hook up with a bunch of people. Social circle lets you hangout with many women at once, make cool male friends too, increase your status, throw events, make money, help and give back to the people in your community, etc. This forum is a social circle, it's just online. Humans are communal we like groups of people. The same skills you learned in pickup can be used on your social life as a whole. Usually you end up with way hotter women too, what I see in cold approach only guys is they aren't able to attract or keep the highest tier of women because usually their social life is empty and boring.
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Freedom
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Sure, but why would I put so much effort into building a social circle I am not that interested in building in the first place when I can just go out and approach a woman on the street and take her on date/start relationship, whatever. It kind of depends on the city you live in but european cities are amazing for this since they are so walkable. I think I saw at least 3-4 hot woman on my way to grocery shop yesterday (and it is like 5 minutes away from my place).
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This week I bumped into a new word: ”intellectual intimacy”. For me, that’s what I have always longed for in relationships. It’s extremely hard for me to be happy in a relationship, if we only explore physical and emotional intimacy, but not intellectual / mind intimacy, where two minds meet and explore together. It feels lacking, shallow and fairly lonely, if there is not the last layer. And we don’t need to agree on everything. Simply the openmindedness, the ability to think nuances and big picture, the ability to be in touch with Spirituality and discuss it. The more I mature, the more it feels like a prerequisite.
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I don't agree basically any hobby has gained some type of mainstream appeal due to mostly the cross-pollination that social media allows us. Video games, trading card games and anime, for example, were seen as super loser hobby that only men liked 10 years ago and now there are e-girls everywhere and you could get laid building out your own Yugioh card group 100%. It's also up to you to also have a top of the funnel side of it where you find a way to get attractive women into your circles or be able to join groups that they are a part of. A high quality dating and social life are not a given, you have to put in a lot of effort to cultivate it. If you do it right there are not many more rewarding things in life though.
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Post #9 I’m the biggest fool on the planet.
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The perfect color chosen.
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If freezing to death is muss less painful then burning to death, the ability to think that while you are in the freezing cold is ... intelligent/ abstract?
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It really looks like war for more territory. Slowly hostigating peasants as to gain control over land. Very very stage red state. Absolutely no care for honest justice, just brute force domination.
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Yes, that is asuming the social circle game is aligned with your interests and values. While it might be good for you, that is not feasible enough for most people simply due to most hobbies/interest/value/circles not attracting enough attractive woman. And it still has to be something you naturally want, which is not everyone. I would even dare to say it is not most people. Btw. The study you linked is refering to students. Obviously they meet via school. But I think on here we are more ambitious than that.
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Very cool. I'm super excited for what generative AI has to bring to the movies and overall entertainment space. Big budgets and gloat have killed originality in Hollywood, it's time to bring it back!
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James123 replied to James123's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
There will be no such a thing as daughter or being high. These are mind activity, not reality. -
If you bring with her isn’t growing for you, then what are you doing? Be careful with chasing for the greener grass and be careful with settling. Relationships arent for everyone. Maybe you should ponder why it is you want a partner. Is it stability, sex, or what? Don’t expect women to fill up all your needs. It is normal to have friend groups where you can get intellectually deep with and have a partner who you can be emotionally deep with.
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Breakingthewall replied to James123's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
So, after enlightenment you could rape your daughter high of meth and that's ok because it's a projection of your mind? -
glassfire replied to AtmanIsBrahman's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
i can feel energy of webcam models, touch there bodies, have sex after in meditation even when the screen is off -
Sure but the point is not to figure out how great they are at it, that's for themselves to introspect on when looking at the quality of their relationships. The point is that most relationships still start out from social circles today, even with how prevalent online dating is. The most surefire way to date hot women is to be in social circles with many of them and display value over time. The guys that are narcissistic, weak willed, inconsistent, etc will weed themselves out and usually if you're a solid man with even a respectable amount of game the single women of the group will gravitate towards you. It's also the most fun way to date because your social circle should ideally be a reflection of your interests and goals if you cater it well over time.
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Okay lets simplify: goal of today is to get into a body doubling call and regulate myself.
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I think part of the anxiety can be explained that I feel like I lost a bunch of social skills because I played so much videogames the last couple of days.
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I tried doing the forgiveness exercise for my father. I seem to have gotten stuck at almost every point. In this case I tried to forgive my father for trafficking me. I was pretty overwhelmed to the point that the video would fade in and fade out. Sometimes I would hear it and other times it seemed to fall on deaf ears. There was one thing that did stick out though. It was this idea that by not letting go of the pain, I am hurting others and passing it onto them due to unconsciousness and ignorance as I am blinded by my own pain. This puts me in an awkward position. I suspect that I may have already hurt people as a consequence of my unresolved trauma such as the things my mother and father did to me that crippled my relationship with my sexuality and made intimacy very difficult for me. The social isolation that results is also painful and might make it less obvious as to how I might be hurting people. In reality, people apparently get vicarious trauma from me talking about these things. I also sometimes express thoughts of wanting to end my life. I don't know how much that might be hurting people, but I do feel that way and sometimes I feel like I don't care because I hate my life and want it to end. I may have also become a burden due to losing my job over severe depression. I struggle to see the point in anything and I can't find someone who can actually help. I'm sick of relying on AI for emotional support, but I struggle to find a human who would actually help. Additionally, there is the people I could have helped but didn't due to the educational disruptions over depression. I was unable to finish my education due to hospitalization. In that case it is not that I overtly harmed someone, but that my pain has prevented me from reaching my highest self from which I could have prevented more pain in myself and others. At the same time I am constantly conflicted over things like life purpose and meaninglessness and feeling lost in life but unable to resolve this problem. The main reason I struggle to let go of what my dad did to me is partially due to survivor's guilt. He and his gang claimed to engage in broader prostitution deals. The possibility that this is true and they actually raped multiple victims makes it feel like a betrayal to let these things go. At the same time, they could have lied and I may have been the only child they actually trafficked. Additionally, I sometimes feel like my silence enabled my father's behavior by not turning him into the police. I just froze and did nothing which leads it me blaming myself and feeling responsible for his behavior. The outcome is that I sometimes feel driven to be vocal about these sorts of things. This is similar to other survivors of childhood sexual abuse who may have a desire to speak out against such abuse for fear of feeling responsible if they stay silent. In my case, I did try helping other victims. What I did was I documented what happened with my father and his associates. I outlined the evidence surrounding the situation in the hopes that the patterns could be used to aid in other cases. The problem is that sometimes my grandma goes through my emails and starts deleting things she doesn't think is important. Therefore, I tried to tell her that I had some important emails incoming with regards to child sex trafficking because of what her son did to me. Now she is pissed, my aunt is pissed, and my cousin is pissed. I wouldn't have done that if she didn't delete important things in my emails, otherwise I wouldn't have needed to give her a heads up about this one to make sure it doesn't get deleted. I guess part of my problem with recovery is that I seem to weight the pain of other victims as higher than my own. It is like my caring tethers me to the pain and doesn't let it go because it feels like betrayal. This seems to be a recurring pattern in which I feel like I am responsible for preventing this kind of harm and I failed because of my father. The pain ends up being too much and it undermine my ability to function. If I could have a healthy relationship with my sexuality it would probably help along with having a sense of direction, meaning, and purpose. I just often feel like who I am isn't enough or who I am supposed to be. I remember I used to find a sense of direction through chess improvement. I wanted to be a professional chess player, but I was derailed by my family insisting on a different life path because they didn't want me playing chess all day. They stopped me originally, and now are acting like they didn't stop me and were supportive. At the same time, I no longer have the same confidence in that dream as I once did. I was given too much proof that my goal of professional chess play was a pipe dream and I needed to construct an alternative identity and life purpose as my desires and passions were obstacles to a practical survival which felt fundamentally empty and meaningless as it was void of love. I ended up researching a broad range of subjects hoping that learning would give me a path to something new and meaningful. This was originally to substitute for the love my mother and father never gave me. Chess became load bearing in the sense that it gave me a domain in which I could develop mastery and competence, and having it disrupted has now tainted it with grief and the question of what if I could somehow still make it work. It isn't very well known, but autistic depression is apparently much deeper and crippling than most cases of depression. Special interests are often load bearing and if they fall apart or interest is lost, then life loses its sense of meaning, direction, and belonging. It also doesn't seem to help that I instead get religious messages about Jesus being the key to salvation. I had some bad therapists who insisted I pray despite my objections while saying "how dare you try to control the future" with this sense that I need to surrender to God without recognizing how I concieve of God. This is why I don't tell therapists my spiritual views. At any rate, I am in a lot of misery. I tried forgiveness for my mother and father, but got stuck. In the case of my mother she gaslit me when I was six into believing I was a rapist. At the same time, if I don't forgive then I might continue to harm others as a consequence of my bitterness in life. I can see this dynamic and I am afraid of becoming someone who is like this as it seems like someone even worse who no longer cares about hurting others. In order to prevent this, I may need to find what do I need in order to avoid being bitter in life. It might not be any grand purpose. It might be just anything that can stop me from being consumed by the bitterness and depression to the point that life seems unlivable no matter what I try.
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glassfire replied to James123's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
when god steps into your home, everything belongs to him, your money, your daughter... you may experience euphoria while that is happening, you surrender. dementia is your gift -
Israel and the IDF have been caught executing violent war crimes and sadistically punishing even innocent palestinians many times. Their ideology goes beyond protecting themselves and their people. It's think that they are the chosen ones and look down on other races and religions. Let alone the conspiracy that they are going full expansionism and want to make that happen by violently expanding their borders. This is not all Israelis but seems to be the view of the current regime under Netanyahu.
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Woman are just as bad about screening characteristics suitable for long term relationships as guys are.
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I dont even know how, but I am in a super low energy and pretty high anxiety mode. I dont even want to leave my room.
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I dont feel good right now at all. That I missed the social opportunity yesterday stings, it was a pretty big group building thing. And there are all writing about the experience from yesterday. I am wondering if this is a pattern of avoiding certain events to not face the possibility of connecting with people.
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I would say women usually take longer to really get attracted specifically because they are screening for long term characteristics. Which is why building a social circle with women works so well for dating because they get to experience you over time and the guys that fake the high status characteristics for a quick lay are weeded out. If you look good and are charismatic a lot of women are gonna like you right away but that's shallow attraction compared to really getting to know your over months and seeing that you are the man in different types of circumstances.
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