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There are no benefits from it as it is a pointless torture long term, however in a certain sense I think our very liberal culture is underestimating the negative effects of just fapping/releasing in general all the time, or as many times as you please. It shouldn't necessarilly be as many times as you please. I think once or twice a week is the best (a week of no release reaches testosterone peak for men according to certain studies). I don't know how it is for women but I've even dealt once with a woman who couldn't cum anymore cause she had a desensitized vagina cause she masturbated and looked at porn so much, if this is something that can happen to a woman then of course it's bound to have some negative effects on men
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This is really impressive.
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Europe is nothing without America.
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One psychological shift that helped me a lot was to notice the difference between being horny primarily physiologically and being horny primarily psychologically. Sometimes I just got a super boner for no reason and a very short job got me to finish. No porn needed. Thats primarily physiologically, my body is designed to release a load sometimes. Doing it feels clean, no unmotivation/ energy drop/ psychological hit afterwards. But oftentimes I was emotionally in a difficult place, maybe had a hard task ahead of me and used porn to escape that reality by emotionally stimulating myself with porn. Usually my body wasnt even ready to jerk off, I needed to built my boner. It takes more time and without porn I couldnt finish or even wanted to jerk off. You feel a psychological hit afterwards, less motivation and energy and so on.. I realized that fapping is damaging to me to the degree that it is a coping mechanism as the more I stimulated myself with porn and the less my body was physiologically in the mood (no boner) the more damaging it felt.
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To everyone - I did not mean to offend anybody. I was literally studying a concept out of desperation I guess. I am trying to explain it as best of my abilities, but apparently I am not doing a very good job. It seems everybody is strictly opposed this - do you please have any other suggestion? Anything to look into? Books etc.? I would greatly appreciate also books on sexual dynamics that you find useful. thank you all.
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Thank you for your answers guys
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— Arthur Schopenhauer After i saw Leo's blog post on "How Intelligent People Deal With Idiots", i saw this quote above on the video and i actually wrote something similar. If we observe this from a meta level, from spiral dynamic's lens, we see that independent thinking is only seen on individuals at late green stage and yellow stage, and everyone bellow that use "authority" in more and more sophisticated ways the higher they are on the spiral, to a point where sometimes it can look like independent thinking, but it's actually just believing in authority. It happens like this: Lower blue stage: Truth is received, not discovered. Believes thinking isn't available to them, and that Knowledge is hierarchical, and they see themselves in the bottom, that's why they feel like imposters when trying to think about something independently. Rely on authority, common and trendy social knowledge and behavior. All intellectual activity comprise memorization of given knowledge within the major framework they've been indoctrinated with. Higher stage blue: The individual begins comparing authorities within the major authority framework, rather than blindly obeying one. (example: people here will never question religion for example, but only sub-frameworks or branches) Thinking becomes a tool for selecting the “correct” framework, not transcending frameworks. (that's why it looks like independent thinking, but it's just "true authority vs false authority" type of thinking) High degree of rationalizations, cognitive errors, biases, logical fallacies and self-deception. (result of trying to think for the first time) Intellectual effort is spent defending and refining inherited and believed truths. Independent thought is tolerated only if it leads back to the major established framework. Lower Orange stage: Authority shifts from religion/tradition/inherited truth to experts, science, and measurable success. Rational stuff, proven stuff, tangible stuff. same "true authority vs false authority" type of thinking, but selection here relies on results, competence, virality, social proof. very biased rationality that lack first principles thinking and epistemic investigation. Selecting different authorities using biased rationality is what looks like independent thinking Higher Orange Stage: The individual starts comparing major competing frameworks. different scientists, different philosophies... (which looks like independent thinking, but that's still authority, just at a higher level) originality exists here, but only as as recombination of external ideas. High trust in external proven truths that "make sense" VS low trust in internal first person investigation. Lower Green stage: Trust in Turning inwards starts to increase, but only through belief (ironic ik), turning outwards is kinda integrated. High trust in intuition, emotions, the immaterial, but only as a result of believing in that, belief here is mistaken for intuition. High trust in social consensus, it becomes a major authority High degree of abstraction, theorization, using esoteric language, believing in all sorts of crazy spiritual immaterial theories merely through belief that's mistaken for intuition. Relying on emotional resonance, collective lived experience, questioning conventional truths and then replacing them with new chosen unconventional ones is what looks like independent thinking. The individual is still inside a paradigm, but is unconscious of that fact Higher Green stage: The individual recognizes multiple truths and contextual perspectives. Starts to step out of the paradigm of thinking that ruled their worldview and starts to become aware of existence of paradigms. Thinking becomes more self-reflective and aware of bias. Ambiguity tolerance increases significantly. The start of independent, unbiased, detached thinking. driven merely by desire for understanding with nothing to gain, with no agenda or nothing to prove or defend, that is done with radical open-mindedness. The person starts seeing all ideologies, including their own, as partial constructions. Second tier thinking - yellow stage: Thinking becomes systemic rather than ideological. The individual sees every framework as a tool rather than absolute truth. Authority and belief are used as tools while being conscious of the risk that comes with that. they're used strategically and consciously. Epistemology and first principles thinking become non negotiable. Holistic thinking emerges. Tolerance for contradictions and paradoxes. Epistemic humility is high. Original thought emerges through deep synthesis and first-principles observation. High trust in direct observation. constant study of self-deception High reliance on direct experience and trail and error (there is probably more to say about this stage but that's all i got, for now) Stage Turquoise: wait, you expect me to simply break down this stage? who the fuck do you think i am? (just kidding) anyway, this post took almost 2 hours to put together, so you better engage with it or i will come for you. also feel free to point out the gaps and things you think are wrong.
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Hello NewKidOnTheBlock, I partially replied to this in my previous post (in my reply to something_else) - yeah that is the idea actually. What the woman brings is the intangible, the energy she is in while being with the man, making him feel good, respecting him, creating him a home, bringing and caring for children (if they have any), taking care of herself and her looks, appreciating him for what he does. And also working - I explained it above about the feminine work and also about the sex part. You know when you are doing things in life, when they are truly appreciated, it makes you feel great. Apparently, she says that men need this. That is the dynamic - one person is giving, the other person is receiving. If both are giving, and nobody is receiving with appreciation, that makes the giving not so fulfilling. I know there are forums and videos and channels on internet where people agree with this and then there are forums where people strongly disagree. I think it is very courageous from you to be saying that I "haven't been brought up well". Just because I asked a question in a forum? I said that I had many reservations towards this approach and that I was never in any other relationship than fifty fifty. So..if you have a suggestion what a healthy relationship dynamic should look like, I would love to hear that. But otherwise..I don't know what to say.
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How long was this phase? Took me weeks until my first wet dream occured. A whole fruit diet lacks fats, proteins and other minerals. Your body cant function properly on it so thats why the period doesnt come. When you exercise for several hours your body directs resources into the recovery of the body, so thats why the period might not occur.
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Hello something_else, thank you for your reply and input. I really appreciate you taking the time and replying to me on this. To clarify on what I meant (I am sorry maybe I am writing it all wrong, cause I feel like I am leaving a very negative impression here on her work based on the replies here) - she did not mean that the woman is just laying around all day doing nothing. That would not be something I would even consider. What she means is that the partners work together as a union, each of them is in their polarity (man is in his masculine and woman is in her feminine) and each of them is contributing with their individual gifts. She was saying that men are unhappy in fifty fifty relationships (and that they are ending up resenting the woman they are with), because they do not feel respected, appreciated and they don't feel like a man, living to their full potential. (I cannot comment on this, cause I am not a man, so I don't know what men need to feel fulfilled in a relationship). However she was saying that a true respect is not possible in a relationship where a woman si basically doing exactly the same thing as the man. But if he is securing her, taking care of her and providing, then she can respect him easily and appreciate him honestly. What the men is getting out of this - based on her explanation is that he feels useful, manly and fulfilled. He is fed with the feminine energy (this is what she was explaining as well that kind of disturbed me a bit - she was saying that the women is being depleted by having sex with the man, as he is recharging and refreshing himself through sex, while she is depleting herself - that is why she should be provided for, cause if she is charging up a man via sex, then she should get something back...?). I mean this feels off to me and if any of you have any resources on this sexual dynamics, I would be happy to educate myself further. Well the difference between level 1 and 3 should be in the consciousness and options - each of them is in their polarity and recognizing that in order for them to be fulfilled, they have to have a polarized relationship - it is not supposed to be fair, it is supposed to be in adherence to nature. Nobody is forced to do it, they have other options, but they decide to do, cause it makes them feel good. I mean the whole providing was normal in the past, so she is basically talking about how we evolved. And the level 3 is supposed to bring together two people who consciously know what makes them feel good and they acting according to it, even if it is not fifty fifty fair. The endless dating point - she says it is a bug because men allegedly know very fast if they want to marry a woman (historically people got married in arranged marriages where the person was vetted and they did not have three years to be dating and testing and verifying. There was mentioned in the videos that a lot of men basically knew that they are never gonna marry their longterm girlfriends and they were just dragging them on. I would never think this was possible, until I discussed this topic with several groups of women who told me that after years of having a boyfriend, they had to drag him to the altar (I mean he was not willing to do it on his own without a little or bigger push...). And Mina says that if you use rotational dating, the men usually propose very fast (because they know soon if they want you as a wife or not). Look I am not saying that this is a correct approach. This is what I studied as a concept, I never used it in practice. I do not have the feeling that anybody would be used in this case. I mean the man has to be aware of what is happening. I am simply asking questions here, because this is a forum and this was an idea and concept that is drastically different from what I ever studied on relationships. I want to thank you again for your thoughts. I find them super useful and your comment is exactly why I asked this question. I have many issues with this approach, but I wanted to discuss it.
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Some thinking out loud this morning. At different moments in your life you have different sets of thoughts that churn around. When I examine my thoughts they're kind of dreamlike in their character, you know the sort of thing, what would it be like if I was rich and living in mansion, what would it be like if I'd been born somewhere else, born as a different person, and so on. They're dreamlike because they occur but in themselves don't have much meaning or gain any traction: it's unlikely that I will ever live in a mansion. I see it more as curiosity, as mentally "trying on different clothes". One thing that I seem to have a deep affinity with is the outdoor life. I watch videos about people camping, I like nothing more than the beach on holiday, or sitting outdoors in a cafe, working with others in an outdoor project building stuff, hiking, road running. All this might stem from being outdoors nearly all the time as a kid, and especially in the hot dry climate of Andalusian Spain. To me it's play, exploration, freedom, cameraderie, expansiveness. And yet, somehow I'm nearly always indoors. I think subconsciously this fact bothers me, although I don't dwell much on these types of thought generally. I'm inside my head a lot, and this requires a certain amount of stillness and quietude, and being outdoors is the antithesis of that. This need for thinking slowly built up over a very long stretch of time, I was always a curious kid, and when I worked out that I could learn and solve things for myself I never looked back. My default state is "outdoor", "physical", "social", but there is a great weight of "indoor","mental","solitude" working in the opposite direction. I should probably be thankful for having such a balance in my character. But there is also the more subtle battle going on, outdoor is unstructured being, indoor is structured discipline. I've gone from playing "out there" to playing in my head, and I know that I've lost something of my true character along the way. Being an adult requires a fair amount of structure and discipline, and part of me strongly wants to have un-structure and openendedness, not to be tied to anything: freedom from obligation.
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Good example of an activity which importance does not justify the investment
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Enlightenment Atlas https://spireason.neocities.org/enlightenment.html Chakra Map (Main Menu Position) https://spireason.neocities.org/#chakra A unified map of awakening: mythic, modern, scientific, and symbolic. Each enlightenment type is presented as a distinct mode of consciousness, yet all connect like chakras in a single human system. -
1 month.
- Today
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How the other half live.
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One boy's blast is another girl's blessed.
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"Stupid is as stupid does" What a beautiful mind, Schopenhauer had. A man after god's own heart, I mean a man after my own heart. What still blows my mind is that anything you imagine can become a reality. I mean, anything is possible, you could dream as Harry Potter or as Blade Runner in the year 2049. The only limits are the ones you place on yourself. My next dream could be so far in the future that it's the end of the universe. How cool is that? The power of consciousness is unlimited.
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gettoefl replied to r0ckyreed's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Does fear exist? No. It is a rope appearing as a snake. I misperceived. I enslaved myself. I limited myself. There was nothing to fear. When seen, it departs. The snake was never there. It was a rope the whole time. This may be realised. That the limited mind is non-existent. Absolute Mind is the causeless source and the true nature. -
With a strong will and extreme levels of discipline.
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Was it in the news or in the nows. If the first it is plain lies. If second, when are you going to step up? To veer to the highest truth, you need only heal one other to heal the world. Try it. As Janet Jackson put it, what have you done for me lately?
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If you were a hot girl in this life you would have a blast giving freely to everybody 🤣
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Nowhere am I seeing what it is that you are supposed to provide, except for yourself. Not even any kind of effort from your side, and clearly not being raised all too well, considering you are engaging with the idea of spinning men as plates (yes they'd all be dates, but that's pretty much almost identical as men spinning women via sex from a woman's POV). So, since you haven't been brought up well and you'd never be willing to put much effort if any, it is pretty much a wrap, or, in other words, it's over, finito
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I stopped shaving many years ago, one less endless task to worry about. Life's better now, I embrace my hair and how I am naturally. I receive great feedback by most now that the Lion has developed more in full Mum still is disturbed by my beard, but she' a disturbed person in general. My body hair and beard is quite soft, so it never bothers me. Gals always ask me, how you get hair like that, what's your routine? what you do? Pretty much nothing... I just try eat clean and live a healthy life. I use an organic shampoo like once a month, that's about it, never noticed much. Bathing in some rivers always makes my hair feel luxuriously soft, like the best conditioner in the world, especially tea tree lakes.
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Conscious relationship is to come to the world with no needs to only give and to be non-exclusive. Others may range from madonnas to murderers. Not a problem what they do or how they respond. You do what you have to. If on the other hand you still have needs, then play the normal game.
