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Just woke up, I meditated to various stuff, the level of greed, and mania is untouchable with the polarity of the near east, and their schizo consciouness, it's very bad, to wish for so much merging imo, and some individuals are fucked creatures. I had to laugh so hard taking a picture of femboy 3000, in order to defend myself from piss russian racism. This is not bias! This is ethnocentric hatred!
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gettoefl replied to JoshB's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
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That’s because the enlightened dude isn’t trying. The club promoter however has the job of trying to get women. Why do club promoters doing drugs help them get women? Because it numbers their self judgement and negative inner dialogue. The enlightened guy also has that naturally. When an enlightened guy tries he probably can do even better. Osho slept with hundreds of women. Its just that if you’re someone who put in the effort to become enlightened or became enlightened such material pursuits are probably of less interest.
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It's called "Analogical thinking". thank me later.
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I can't remember with how many women I have had sex with in the last 2-3 days.... But there are a few I can remember, because I had sex with them before. Haha.
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Pure environmentalism values the environment over humanity and wants humans to depopulate. It doesn't actually matter much how that is framed. You shouldn't really subscribe to any one ideology in my opinion. There's a reason why theword "ideologue" is prejorative. Because they are crazy people. Just cherry pick the best parts.
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The issue there isn’t sex is easy to get. It’s that they aren’t developing themselves or are still trying to use it to fill their emptiness or avoid confronting themselves. They likely behave like that because it was hard to get so they attached their self worth to it. Sex being hard to get is worse because now you’re spending all your time fixating on how to get sex instead of just viewing it as normal and self actualizing in other ways. Sex is easy to get for women yet that doesn’t result in women wrecking their lives in most cases, and if it does it’s usually some other issue.
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I would add to this: Break all your dependence on external validation, learn to sit alone and be happy, discover as much as you can about yourself.
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A Letter to my 21 Year Old Self I was in the mood to read my old journal that I wrote in from July 2020 to August 2021. I was expecting it to be much more cringe than it was. There were a couple of moments where I caught myself rolling my eyes, but they were few and far between. The thing that inspired me to write this post was the following part of an entry where I was wondering where I would be at 26: I laughed when I got to this part. Yup, here I am at 26 reporting for duty. I remember when writing this, I was writing about all the ways that the pandemic fucked up my college experience, how I thought I would have been further along in life by now, and as a result, how if 16 year old me saw me at 21 she would burst out in tears. As I was reading this entire journal, I found myself thinking I had come a long way in terms of the overall quality of my life and my ability to cope. I was so much more stressed, anxious and depressed when writing in The Joy Journal compared to where I am now. And if I could send a letter to my 21 year old self, the first thing I would do is reassure her regarding her fears for the future. You found stable employment very shortly after college. It's not a job in my desired field but it does pay enough and it isn't a *head empty no thoughts* kind of job. You were able to live on my own for 2 years in Dallas and then you moved in with my boyfriend. You got into this relationship back in May 2022 and y'all have been going strong ever since. He is incredibly smart, competent, gentle, and genuine. He lives up to a lot of the stuff that you have written in your journal about what kind of man you wanted as your first relationship. And you're pretty good in a romantic relationship. I know you were scared at first because of the sketchy people you have encountered, the weird men and manosphere bubbles you encountered on the internet, and you were doubting your own judgement as well as ability to have a healthy and happy relationship. I want to say that you found a safe person despite all that and that you have done so much work both independentally through journalling, therapy, meditating, and self inquiry to where this relationship has been incredibly smooth. You did manage to make friends in college and you were able to study abroad. Those were really good experiences for you and you grew a lot. You also travelled quite a bit after college as well. You're still figuring out some elements of how to navigate friendship in adulthood but you're still in a pretty good spot. You have a ton of money saved up and you're financially stable and responsible. You have gotten a couple of promotions at work as well. And yes, you have had challenges since then and the world is still in a messed up place, but you're navigating that in a much more level headed way. You are still capable of being cordial with your parents but you do still keep quite a bit of distance from them. Yes, this was hard to deal with emotionally and I know you were thinking about going no contact, but you found boundaries and ways of dealing with them in a way that works for you. And honestly, getting your own place was a huge piece to that puzzle. You're still figuring things out in your life, but you have come a long way. Everything is going to be alright. I think reading this journal was in interesting experience. I'm really thankful that I captured a moment in my life so completely in that journal. Reading it felt so familiar and so jarringly different at the same time. It felt familiar in the sense that I don't have a radically different world view when you compare my writing from 2021 to 2026. It's not like I went from being a red pill guy to a feminist. But when I was reading the posts there, I found myself thinking *oh that's when I came up with that conclusion/ had that insight* when I came across things that feel like common sense to me now. I also feel like there is this overanalyzing/ anxious part of my personality that shines through my writing both in 2021 and 2026. I have a lot of the same values and same degree of depth that I look at the world around me. Like reading this journal felt like I was tracking my sense making process in real time because of the way that my writing took me back to 2021. I still largely feel the same way in this post. I would make a few tweaks regarding what I'm aspiring towards because I think my values manifest a little differently now. But my values and the things that bring me joy and fulfillment are largely the same 5 years later: While I feel like the sense making part of my brain is the same, the parts about the journal that feel jarringly different include my emotional state/ wellbeing, my life circumstances, and the amount of life experience I have had since then. My job, though stressful and frustrating at times, is no where near as stressful as my college years during the pandemic. I am no where near suicidal, I'm not having panic attacks, I can fulfill most of my adult responsibilities on a regular basis, and I have some time to breathe on a day to day basis. Socially, I'm in a much better place platonically and romantically. And I am so thankful for my opportunities to travel, gain work experience, and gain a sense of independence in living on my own. And I have a HUGE sense of gratitude for having my own apartment and having financial stability. That was a very big game changer in terms of my overall wellbeing on so many levels. On a less positive note, I still found myself thinking I'm still dysfunctional in some ways that is similar to 2021, but that dysfunction manifests a bit differently and much less intensely. I am still socially anxious. The anxiety back then stemmed from a lack of social experience, shame from my life circumstances, and a not so great self image. The anxiety now stems from me being rusty with some social skills and me having uncertainty around adult friendships due to how much the landscape of life changes after you graduate school. I still have trouble seeing myself as the main character and having that sense of outward confidence. But unlike 2021, in 2026 it doesn't inhibit me from doing what I need to do and going after what I want in my life. I am still someone who is in my head a lot and who analyzes things to death. But in 2026, I would say that I'm much more in healthier place regarding stage yellow to where I'm not experiencing a lot of the drawbacks with that stage. And yes, I still feel angsty about the pandemic. Though I feel like I have come a long way since then and it feels like it was a lifetime away, I can still see the ways it altered my development and the socialization of the people around me. Things are still pretty weird socially, politically, and economically. With all that being said and considering the stuff in my life I'm trying to figure out, I have a few questions for 31 year old me: How are you? Where are you in your life? Do we still live in Dallas? Are we still with him? How are your friendships going? What are your feelings around parenthood? What has happened in the world since 2026? Did things calm down at all or did things just get crazier?
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“Women only love men they respect” or “women only sleep with men they respect” always seemed like nonsense to me. A woman can respect a wise old sage and not want to bang him. A woman can not respect some degenerate drug addled club promoter but sleep with him. A woman can love her husband due to their shared investment but not be attracted to him anymore.
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I seem to remember Leo saying solipsism and not solipsism are the same thing but I can’t seem to grasp this. I realized I live in a complete fantasy world and am heartbroken. Literally got random people in public whispering they aren’t real and shit and ring doorbells speaking to me. And so much different shit has happened it’s seemingly impossible it’s fall into the old “I must be crazy” schtick. What am I supposed to do go dream up another dream and fall in love with some beautiful woman just to find out she’s a complete fucking fantasy? Hopefully my imaginary friends here can give me some good advice.
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mark mansion is a scammer
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Yes, I understand. I could work much less and survive nicely if I were less ambitious. It made me see that tendency you're pointing at, to be a low unconscious factor in the equation that I had never truly noticed. I'll still work hard for the next 15 years, because I want to, but it's clear to me I'll exhaust it eventually. I've seen too many people burnt to be in executive positions after 40, I don't wanna be like that.
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Work Is Not Happiness I am in two minds regarding this post. On the one hand - I recognise humans naturally value something more when they invest in something. When we move toward things we value highly, this can bring pleasure. And happiness - somewhat. But somewhere along the line, my investment in 'tasks' - be they work or not - seemed to have dissolved. I lost my aversion to life tasks. I lost my desire. I experience preference for certain things - yes, absolutely. I feel more keenly and genuinely. I can identify my emotions, thoughts and feelings with crystal clear vision. I do not resist the moment - that is to say - there is no where I would rather be at any point in time and space. Eating a hot meal after a winter bike-ride. Having a hot shower. Even picking up dogshit. Cleaning my toilet. Getting sick and stuck in bed. Injuring myself. My preference is not to experience these last few phenomenologie/s. But I don't resist. I am content with whatever comes my way - good or bad. I accept. So I am happy at work, even right now (procrastinating on the forums a bit ). But it is not work that is causing the happiness, or contentment. It just is. I bring it (happiness) to the work, instead of the work bringing it to me. Maybe this is what you point to? I don't feel it is quite clear to me - yet.
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Post #40 To undertand the matrix you have to exit the matrix, then you'll understand in one fell swoop what the matrix is and what's outside the matrix. Until then you're a fish in water, who dosen't know that it's in the water. Yes you have to leave your comfort zone, which is the matrix. You got stockholm syndrome. Like you're in an abusing relationship but you don't want to leave because you prefer the known.
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I do not know. Either my system metabolizes the RCs much faster than regular humans or my cross tolerance is just so high that nothing really does anything anymore. All the PCP analogues 3-Meo-PCPY, 3-HO-PCE, 3-HO-PCP and Ketamine have cross tolerance. I took speed daily for about 3 weeks and then I ran out and was lying in bed for 2 days unable to find the motivation to get up or do anything. I really did not enjoy that experience. MDMA is great, but not above 120mg, for partying I will take 120mg, for home partying and chilling 60mg. Mushrooms are cool, but too expensive. For a full trip I usually take 5G which is the equivalent of about 25 full acid trips. I highly dislike ACID atm, it is far too heady. I haven't really had it in a long time. DMT is cool, but I haven't had that much experience with it. 5-MeO-DMT is cool too, but it is like Alan Watts said "Once you get the message, hang up the phone": The last trips it really told me "WTF are you doing here again, you really wanna suffocate on your own puke and die? You that stupid you stupid fuck?!?! Yeah I got the message then and didn't take it since". Ketamine and the PCP analogues have way more value than I would have ever imagined. 3-Meo-PCPy is by far my favorite. It is a triple reuptake inhibitor for Seroton, Dopamine and a 3rd one I forgot. I really wanna try out MXPCP again, but my source for that is gone.
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Natasha Tori Maru replied to Elliott's topic in Society, Politics, Government, Environment, Current Events
I get extreme aversion toward him. I dislike his mass surveillance shit via Palantir Enterprises. He heavily advocates for monopolies and favours a sort of 'technocratic elite' and I feel like his stupid theological antichrist lectures are hypocritical attempts to disavow his own vast power. Also his political shit is sketch as fuck financially backing various far right candidates to try to remake liberal democracy. His whole libertarian worldview is sociopathic and dogmatic. Gross 🤢 🤮 - Today
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Ok lol this is another level How are you able to function and survive on this concoction ?
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How about relationships?
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There are ways of having sex with women, that doesn't involve meeting them, interacting with them or having to deal with their "shit". Only issue is that it costs money, but honestly I don't care.
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I am wondering the same thing. I am doing Speed and Ketamine almost every day, with the occasional 1-2 joints and then my 3-MeO-PCPY on fridays with some MDMA and maybe some mushrooms, or Acid or everything + plugged DMT. I don't know. People in my friends circle have told me to turn it down a bit after I had a Psychosis after a Ketamine + Speed all night bender hahaha yesterday. Speed + MDMA + 3-MeO-PCPY + Ketamine during the night + Joints is fun. Also Adding plugged DMT to a trip is also 1 hour of good fun. 5-MeO-DMT has become super boring after I vomited on 80mg plugged and only realized that I vomited after coming back. Glad my body has good survival instincts. Otherwise I would have suffocated on my own puke and there would have been no comeback and no respawn. ROFL 3-HO-PCP + 3-HO-PCE is also a wonderful combination. It is like a scholars mate in chess. Simple and effective. Haha. Unfortunately MXPCP has been pulled from the markets. I have no idea why but I loved it and wished I had gotten 10G or more while it was available. I burned through 3G within a few months.
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Natasha Tori Maru replied to Carl-Richard's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
What if one is an experiencer? -
Leo how happy are you on a day-to-day basis? How much happier has kriya made you?
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I think the biggest part of the problem for men in modern dating is that they stand in their own way. Most girls out there actually want to have sex with or without relationship settings. They literally desire sex possibly more than many men do. They're turned on by default. They even go out shaved and cleaned just in case lol. Your only job as a man is to not turn them off. That's it.
